ISSUE11 fantasy互改群，帮忙看看哈！

mahuUID：179508

贴的文章已经自己修改了一遍了

ISSUE11
All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems.
开头：concede题干。 My: 各个nations需要cultivate他们的学生将来能够devote到社会建设，并创造contribution.
1、从个人角度，高中毕业生不一定选择study in a global university. 举例：各个学生有不同的preference和ambition，他们根据自己的interests，advantage来选择学校，专业。
2、从社会角度，社会需要各种人who have various specialties and capabilities. 举例：软件公司－programmer，in the fields of manufactures－mechanics or electronics engineers
3、从国家角度，各个国家情况不同，有些不适合support the development of a global university. 举例：一些国家需要加强sci-tech， 同时，the development of a global university 的花费会很大
4、Admittedly, 一些well developed countries可以支持the development of a global university. 举例：发展民主，保护环境，解决污染等全球性问题。


The author asserts that all nations should support the development of a global university which engages their students to solve the world's most persistent social problems. I concede that raising the students' ability of solving the world's most persistent problems is an important content in the education. However, in my opinion, the nation should help to develop the university which can cultivate their students who can devote themselves to the country and even make some contribution to the whole world. Solving the world's most persistent social problems is just one of the most important aspects in the education.

In the first, the children graduated from high schools may not choose to study in a global university for many reasons. Different students in different countries have various advantages and ambitions. It is not equal to cultivate them just in the only way that improves their ability to solve the global social problems. Students have authority to choose all kinds of majors which they are interested in and they will devote themselves into the study. Some students who are good at analysis and logics may choose natural science or technology as their major. Some students who have some special talents may choose art or literacy as their major. For example, in the major of natural science such as physics, the professor should pay much attention on the study and experiments in their own fields. They may not focus on the world's most persistent social problems. It is unfair to say that these education which does not care about the global social problems have obvious fallacies.

In the second, the whole society needs all kinds of people who have various specialties and capabilities. There are so many different jobs in the society. The country needs different kinds of people in different position. The software company may need a large amount of programmers.  In the fields of manufactures, the company may need a large amount of engineers who are special at mechanics or electronics. In the realm of politics, the government may need a certain amount of people who have the ability to solve the social problems. However, it does not mean that the government should enroll the people who are only good at solving the global social problems but not familiar with their own countries.

In the third, every nation in the world has its distinctive character and condition. The policy that developing an university which only engage their students to solve the global social problems will bring little help to the construction of their own countries. For example, if a nation need a large amount of people who are special at technology such as mechanics and electronics, the major issue for the government is to give enough support to develop the university which is good at cultivating engineers and scientists. Meanwhile, to construct such a university which designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems may cost a unimaginable money. Every nation should take a comprehensively consideration of this suggestion carefully.

Admittedly, it is constructive to keep in mind that some well developed countries in the world can help to support the university and engage their students to solve the global social problems. These policies can bring much benefit for their own counties in the future.

To sum up, the students do not have to study how to solve the global social problems. Meanwhile, every nation needs different styles of people who are good at some special field not only the realm of solving the global social problems. Furthermore, not all nations in the word are suitable to develop such global universities. Therefore, the claims that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems is over-simplified and ungrounded.

foreveraUID：202035

占座。。。明天早上来看。。。晚上总是很迷糊。。。

modeuxUID：2107416

The author asserts that all nations should support the development of a global university which engages their students to solve the world's most persistent social problems. I concede that raisingraise这里作提高的意思好像不合适，换improving吧~~ the students' ability of solving the world's most persistent problems is an important content in the education. However, in my opinion, the nation should help to develop the university which can cultivate their students who can devote themselves to the country and even make some contribution to the whole world. Solving the world's most persistent social problems is just one of the most important aspects in the education. 这里有点疑问，题目只提到a global university，楼主这里扩大到education，是不是有点不妥~~~

In the first, the children graduated from high schools may not choose to study in a global university for many reasons. Different students in different countries have various advantages and ambitions. It is not equalnot equal->unequal to cultivate them just in the only way that improves their ability to solve the global social problems. Students have authority权威？是不是权利，rights？ to choose all kinds of majors which they are interested in and they will devote themselves into the study. Some students who are good at analysis and logics may choose natural science or technology as their major. Some students who have some special talents may choose art or literacy as their major. For example, in the major of natural science such as physics, the professor should pay much attention onto the study and experiments in their own fields. They may not focus on the world's most persistent social problems. It is unfair to say that these education主谓不一致了，后面是单数了，前面用these which does not care about the global social problems have obvious fallacies.

In the second, the whole society needs all kinds of people who have various specialties and capabilities. There are so many different jobs in the society. The country needs different kinds of people in different position. 前面三句好像说的都是一个意思啊？呵呵~~~ The software company may need a large amount of programmers.  In the fieldsfield of manufactures, the company may need a large amount of engineers who are special at mechanics or electronics. In the realm of politics, the government may need a certain amount of people who have the ability to solve the social problems. However, it does not mean that the government should enroll the people who are only good at solving the global social problems but not familiar with their own countries. 这一段最后的However用得很不好，中心句是说社会需要各种人才，也举了三个领域的例子。后面突然转折显得很突兀，而且使得这一段中心不明确。However的内容放到后面好了。

In the third, every nation in the world has its distinctive character and condition. The policy that这个从句用的好像不对，that后面怎么接动名词了？把that改称of吧 developing ana，不用an university which only engageengages their students to solve the global social problems will bring little help to the construction of their own countries. For example, if a nation needneeds a large amount of people who are special at technology such as mechanics and electronics, the major issue for the government is to give enough support to develop the university which is good at cultivating engineers and scientists. Meanwhile, to construct such a university which designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems may cost amoney不可数，a去掉 unimaginable money. Every nation should take a comprehensively这里该用形容词，应该是comprehensive consideration of this suggestion carefully. 这一段的首句写的不好，最好写成中心句，说这一提议对有的国家弊大于利

Admittedly, it is constructive to keep in mindkeep in mind这里是什么意思？~~~ that some well developedwell-developed countries in the world can help to support the university and engage their students to solve the global social problems. These policies can bring much benefit for their own counties in the future. 这段让步写的不好了，只简单的说了有好处，就嘎然而止了。应该展开论述一下比较好，为什么有好处，好处在哪里。

To sum up, the students do not have to study how to solve the global social problems. Meanwhile, every nation needs different styles of people who are good at some special field not only the realm of solving the global social problems. Furthermore, not all nations in the word are suitable to develop such global universities写反咯~~应该反过来说 to develop such a global university(楼主怎么变成复数universities了？呵呵)is not suitable for all the nations. Therefore, the claims that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems is over-simplified and ungrounded.

mahuUID：179508

这篇文章限时写的，结果那段让步就来不及仔细分析了

虽然修改了，但是还明显留有手忙脚乱的痕迹，

下礼拜就考试了，心里还是蛮慌的

foreveraUID：202035

The author asserts that all nations should support the development of a global university which engages their students to solve the world's most persistent social problems.完全照抄题目好象不是太好 I concede that raising the students' ability of solving the world's most persistent problems is an important content in the education. However, in my opinion, the nation should help to develop the university 带的定语从句好长。。。可以把一个换成状语which can cultivate their students who can devote themselves to the country and even make some contribution to the whole world. Solving the world's most persistent social problems is just one of the most important aspects in the education，not all.开头太长了。。。不够简明

In the first,好象没有TS？ the children graduated from high schools may not choose to study in a global university for many reasons. Different students in different countries have various advantages and ambitions. It is not equal to cultivate them just in the only way that 定语从句里没有主语improves their ability to solve the global social problems. Students have authority 好象有点不准确to choose all kinds of majors which they are interested in and they will devote themselves into the study. Some students who are good at analysis and logics may choose natural science or technology as their major. Some students who have some special talents may choose art or literacy as their major.例子？好象和上文有些距离。。。太突兀了 For example, in the major of natural science such as physics, the professor should pay much attention on the study and experiments in their 指代不明own fields. They may not focus on the world's most persistent social problems. It is unfair to say that these education which does not care about the global social problems have obvious fallacies.感觉这段有点跑。。。始终没有和主题的global university联系上

In the second, the whole society needs all kinds of people who have various specialties and capabilities. There are so many different jobs in the society.有点多余 The country needs different kinds of people in different position. The software company may need a large amount of programmers.  In the fields of manufactures, the company may need a large amount of engineers who are special at mechanics or electronics. In the realm of politics, the government may need a certain amount of people who have the ability to solve the social problems. 段内有这么强烈的转折不好However, it does not mean that the government should enroll the people who are only good at solving the global social problems but not familiar with their own countries.感觉这段也是很勉强的才和解决社会问题联系上。。

In the third, every nation in the world has its distinctive character and condition. The policy that developing an university which only engage their students to solve the global social problems will bring little help to the construction of their own countries.仍然很罗嗦 For example, if a nation need a large amount of people who are special at technology such as mechanics and electronics, the major issue for the government is to give enough support to develop the university which is good at cultivating engineers and scientists. Meanwhile, 前面一直在说解决社会问题。。。这里突然联系上global university感觉太突然。。to construct such a university which designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems may cost a unimaginable money. Every nation should take a comprehensively consideration of this suggestion carefully.

Admittedly, it is constructive 啥意思哦？to keep in mind that some well developed countries in the world can help to support the university and engage their students to solve the global social problems. These policies can bring much benefit for their own counties in the future.论证的太单薄了。。

To sum up, the students do not have to study how to solve the global social problems. Meanwhile, every nation needs different styles of people who are good at some special field not only the realm of solving the global social problems. Furthermore, not all nations in the word are suitable to develop such global universities. Therefore, the claims that all nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems is over-simplified and ungrounded. 结尾还是太长了

感觉总体结构很混乱，前几段都没有和globla univerisity联系起来，这样似乎解决社会问题就是主题了，不过后来又很牵强的联系上了。。这样感觉不是太好。。。而且这个题目的中心似乎还是在global university上。。。

mahuUID：179508

多谢lz

这个global的问题我一直比较糊涂

我的本意是想把他扯到一个大的教育的概念范围内，然后再展开来写

所以有些东西的确很突然，可能还是支持agree的态度来写这篇issue可能效果会好一些

boreasUID：183790

请问一下，我也想过好久这个题目，个人觉得这种写法突出的不是国际化，而是教育了，开始想些倾向于反对，后来觉得同意更好写，将不同意的理由做个让步即可。

个人意见，讨论一下

小破孩UID：2125288

个人觉得前两点有点牵强，题目和个人目标是不是读university和读什么university没什么关系吧，而且globle university的专业也可以多样化啊，也只有多样化才能解决social problem还有社会没什么太大关系吧，第三点很不错。