issue51 [清凉夏日一组作业贴]

helenlhhUID: 2127690

很久没有写作文，写起来很困难，自己觉得很不满意，也没什么思路，还望大家多多指教。

TOPIC: ISSUE51 - "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."
WORDS: 477          TIME: 0:42:15          DATE: 2006-7-16

What is the purpose of education? In my eyes, education should meet the needs of students both in material things and in spirit. That is to say, education should provide the receivers not only the skills and knowledge to go through basic life, but also opportunities for them to explore in certain specific areas that they are interested in. Education should be designed, if to be thought effective, to meet the needs and interests of the whole new generation.

The education system in America is a typical example that satisfies students in both sizes. Schools offers fundamental courses such as reading and math lessons to help students to develop basic skills which prepare them for their further study; Courses deals with specific skills such as cooking, gardening and house making also prevail in grade school education. These skills are useful, for they can make sure the students can lead an independent life in the future. But there are many other courses, fond by students, which are selective and students can choose from a wide range and pick up a few only by their interests. Besides, the extracurricular activities are favored by students sharing the same interests or have common sense. This sort of education system take into account both the needs and interests of most students, and is proved to be successful in inculcate generations that are adapted with the development of the society.

But some people go to some extremes to design education that is perfectly for each of the students. It is too naive to do so because when we talk about education, the general aim is to make each student to meet the needs of the society. It is of great harm if we simply satisfy a young person by offering anything he desires. Firstly, students cannot judge clearly what they actually need. Most college students are eager to be trained into skillful workers, but they fail to see that in the long run, they should be required the ability of learning by oneself to succeed in such a ever-changing world.

For another, overemphasizing interests might lead students to the sick attitude of abandoning anything that they do not like to learn. In this case, students may give up some important learning that is surely useful in the future. Even if we are interested in one thing, we cannot avoid other things which might be boring but closely related to your preferences. If we want to prepare the generation, we should not simply admit them to choose what they like, instead, we should help them to develop interests in most of the subjects for them to enjoy.

in sum, education should meet the needs and interests of the society and the terminal benefits of students. But we should not go too far to design education to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.

主旨：部分赞同：同意满足大多数学生的需求和兴趣，但不可能精确到每一个人
1、        美国的大众教育就是这样做的
2、        不应该满足每个人的需求，学生并不很清楚他们自己到底需要什么
3、        过分强调学生的兴趣会造成偏科，导致一些该学的没学到，而学校应该帮助学生培养兴趣

leonnieUID: 2216142

据说开头最好不要用这种提问式方式
写着么多还不到45m， 赞

abawtresbonUID: 2164961

到底是成熟啊,时间用得真少,羡慕啊!   咀嚼ing..

开头是否也转折一下,全是正面的不太好吧..
我觉得b1展开得非常好
但是b2的TS是否最好把第一句和第二句的前半结合一下,我比较喜欢有态度的主题句,象b3那样的
b2b3都没有什么例证,可能跟你时间比较赶也有关系吧~~

真羡慕啊,时间用这么少!!!

dendrobiumUID: 2226505

还可补充的是：学校尽量培养学生的兴趣，但是不可能每个人的都一样
如果每个学生的兴趣都不同，基本不能达到按每个学生的要求来办学，不方便管理，实现的可能性很小

Amelia1214UID: 2228270

What is the purpose of education? In my eyes, education should meet the needs of students both in material things and in spirit.[应该both in material and spirit就行了] That is to say, education should provide the receivers not only the skills and knowledge to go through basic life[provide…with…] , but also opportunities for them to explore in certain specific areas that they are interested in. Education should be designed, if to be thought effective[虽然没错，但好像有些别扭^_^], to meet the needs and interests of the whole new generation.

The education system in America is a typical example that satisfies students in both sizes.[sides] Schools offers[offer] fundamental courses such as reading and math lessons to help students to develop basic skills which prepare them for their further study; Courses deals with specific skills such as cooking, gardening and house making also prevail in grade school education. These skills are useful, for they can make sure the students can lead an independent life in the future. [一个句子里最好不要用两个can]But there are many other courses, fond by students,[fond adj]. which are selective and students can choose from a wide range and pick up a few only by their interests[用according to会不会好点]. Besides, the extracurricular activities are favored by students sharing the same interests or have[having] common sense. This sort of education system take[takes] into account both the needs and interests of most students, and is proved to be successful in inculcate generations [inculcating the young] that are adapted with the development of the society.[可以举个例子]

But some people go to some[some多余] extremes to design education that is perfectly for each of the students. It is too naive to do so because when we talk about education, the general aim is to make each student to meet the needs of the society. It is of great harm if we simply satisfy a young person by offering anything he desires. Firstly, students cannot judge clearly what they actually need. Most college students are eager to be trained into skillful workers, but they fail to see that in the long run, they should be required the ability of learning by oneself to succeed in such a ever-changing world. [这个观点不错，给了我一些启发，可以继续展开]

For another, overemphasizing interests might lead students to the sick attitude of abandoning anything that they do not like to learn[sick 可以修饰attitude吗，to learn有点多余]. In this case, students may give up some important learning that is surely useful in the future[surely用得不太好]. Even if we are interested in one thing, we cannot avoid other things[others] which might be boring but closely related to your preferences. If we want to prepare the generation[prepare换成benefit], we should not simply admit them to choose what they like,[句号] instead, we should help them to develop interests in most of the subjects for them to enjoy.

in sum, education should meet the needs and interests of the society and the terminal benefits of students. But we should not go too far to design education to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.[ needs and interests重复得太多了。最后一句的意思有些模糊]
写得挺快啊，要赞！
但用词上还存在一些问题，正文应该多举些例子充实一下
第一次改，水平有限，呵呵

[ 本帖最后由 Amelia1214 于 2006-7-17 00:52 编辑 ]

CharaznablezUID: 2140987

写的真实挺快的. 是不是实际考试的时候要选题再加上构思要占去3分多钟啊?
文章语言值得我学习,说一下问题吧:
1.我觉得跟阿宝说的一样,b2 主题句太后面了读到中间才有这段要讲的,结果论述只有一句太少了吧, 而且其实b3跟这段联系很紧啊,fall to see long term 可能就是因为the attitude of abandoning anything that they do not like to learn
2.文章写了两段反对意见可是开头主题句根本没提这不好吧
3.例子有点太少了 (这是我想跟你讨论的,谢谢你对我文章的评论,我也觉得我文章太多罗列例子但是其实我不列例子也不知道怎么展开,总觉得空说一是不充实二是我水平也写不了很多字还费不少时间.但这个确实是个问题 ,看你文章有点启发.不过这篇例子可能太少了.能不能详细跟我说说 还应该怎么论证呢?)

helenlhhUID: 2127690

非常感谢大家，让我受益匪浅！我会好好把这篇文章改改，再给大家看。
关于论证的问题，交流贴里讨论。

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=495339&highlight=