issue141 quickbreeze的第若干篇

quickbreezeUID: 195262

141. Most people recognize the benefits of individuality, but the fact is that personal economic success requires conformity.
time: 56:01    words:547

1、individuality很重要（科学方面的例子）
2、individuality在经济上也很重要
3、conformity也是获得经济成功的必要条件

It seems at the first glance that individuality and conformity contradict with each other. However, indeed, they may interact and cooperate to acquire better results, especially when the topic of personal economics is concerned. I generally agree with the speaker's views about both the benefits of individuality and the significance of conformity.

The crucial role of individuality in daily life and societal development has long been well recognized. In many fields such as natural sciences and industry, individuality is regarded as the source of innovation. An outstanding inventor has his own thoughts and ideas which exceed the reach of ordinary people. It is this kind of feature that distinguishes him from the ordinary. It is this kind of feature that makes him seem a little bit strange.  At the same time, it is this kind of feature that reveals the greatness of his thoughts which leads the pace of the times. Take Albert Einstein as an example. When his theory of relativity, the milestone in physics history, first came out to the world, hardly few people could understand it. Both his dishevel hair and seemingly weird thoughts are looked as the signs for individuality and cleverness.

Also, in the field of economics, individuality has made considerable contributions to achieving personal success. A person who always goes after others will never find his rich gold mine but only some, if any, poor ones which are not chosen by the heralds. In the world of business, always to follow others is not a good strategy. For instance, the prices of stocks often change violently during a very short time. It's impractical to rely your decisions on observing and following others' conducts. To win personal success, individuality is a pivot which takes an individual out of the crowd of plain people. A successful entrepreneur has the ability to make his own way which shows his individuality. Without individuality, Brim and Page, the two founders of Google which is now the biggest internet searching engine in the globe, would not have the courage to finish their program, and we would not be able to get information so quickly as we actually are today.

However, on the other hand, too much emphasis on individuality may bring about eccentricity and peculiarity which exceed normal standard. Conformity is also beneficial and indispensable to win personal economic success. Human is a sort of societal animal and we do business in the whole market, where exist some elements out of personal control. Conformity appeals the accordance with the environment, including the natural resources, national price climate and so on. Moreover, a person who has the character of conformity is good at tackling the relationship with others. No successful entrepreneur, no matter Bill Gates or Teddy Turner, goes to the extreme of individuality to simply try to catch people's eyes. They have learned the very importance of conformity and the useful skill to build a beneficial environment.

In sum, both individuality and conformity deserve considerable attention. Not only neither of them can be overwhelmed by the other, but their sensitive relationship should be kept in a good balance as well. Since this is really a formidable task, it's natural to understand why there are so few individuals with great personal economic success.

SayyesUID: 2186610

It seems at the first glance that individuality and conformity contradict with each other. However, indeed, they may interact and cooperate to acquire better results, especially when the topic of personal economics is concerned. I generally agree with the speaker's views about both the benefits of individuality and the significance of conformity.[开头简洁清晰，观点明确]

The crucial role of individuality in daily life and societal development has long been well recognized. In many fields such as natural sciences and industry, individuality is regarded as the source of innovation[这句话很有力，是本段论证的核心，可围绕此句展开，相比之下后三句小有气势，但有点散了]. An outstanding inventor has his own thoughts and ideas which exceed the reach of ordinary people. It is this kind of feature that distinguishes him from the ordinary[people]. It is this kind of feature that makes him seem a little bit strange.  At the same time, it is this kind of feature that reveals the greatness of his thoughts which leads the pace of the times. Take Albert Einstein as an example. When his theory of relativity, the milestone in physics history, first came out to the world, hardly few people could understand it. Both his dishevel hair and seemingly weird thoughts are looked as the signs for individuality and cleverness.

Also, in the field of economics, individuality has made considerable contributions to achieving personal success. A person who always goes after others will never find his rich gold mine but only some, if any, poor ones which are not chosen by the heralds[这个比喻很不错呀]. In the world of business, always to follow others is not a good strategy. For instance, the prices of stocks often change violently during a very short time. It's impractical to rely your decisions on observing and following others' conducts[这个例子很好]. To win personal success, individuality is a pivot which takes an individual out of the crowd of plain people. A successful entrepreneur has the ability to make his own way which shows his individuality. Without individuality, Brim and Page, the two founders of Google which is now the biggest internet searching engine in the globe, would not have the courage to finish their program[Why？individuality=courage？], and we would not be able to get information so quickly as we actually are today.

However, on the other hand, too much emphasis on individuality may bring about eccentricity and peculiarity which exceed normal standard. [这两句话要建立一定连接和过度]Conformity is also beneficial and indispensable to win personal economic success. Human is a sort of societal animal and we do business in the whole market, where exist some elements out of personal control.[这里可以顺便说出这便是economic success 与其他success的区别] Conformity appeals the accordance with the environment, including the natural resources, national price climate and so on. Moreover, a person who has the character of conformity is good at tackling the relationship with others. No successful entrepreneur, no matter Bill Gates or Teddy Turner, goes to the extreme of individuality to simply try to catch people's eyes. They have learned the very importance of conformity and the useful skill to build a beneficial environment. [这一段没有说清conformity的具体作用，似乎conformity就是not to go extreme of individuality。个人觉得本文重心应在conformity上的]

In sum, both individuality and conformity deserve considerable attention. Not only neither of them can be overwhelmed by the other, but their sensitive relationship should be kept in a good balance as well. Since this is really a formidable task, it's natural to understand why there are so few individuals with great personal economic success.

楼主写作功力深厚阿，句子流畅，逻辑清晰，用词精确，值得学习。

yvonnewhuUID: 2202979

issue141 quickbreeze的第若干篇

141. Most people recognize the benefits of individuality, but the fact is that personal economic success requires conformity.
time: 56:01    words:547

1、individuality很重要（科学方面的例子）
2、individuality在经济上也很重要
3、conformity也是获得经济成功的必要条件

It seems at the first glance that individuality and conformity contradict with each other. However, indeed, they may interact and cooperate to acquire better results, especially when the topic of personal economics is concerned. I generally agree with the speaker's views about both the benefits of individuality and the significance of conformity.[开头间接明了，总结了正反两方面意思之后，又给出了自己的观点]

The crucial role of individuality in daily life and societal development has long been well recognized. In many fields such as natural sciences and industry, individuality is regarded as the source of innovation. An outstanding inventor has his own thoughts and ideas which exceed the reach of ordinary people. It is this kind of feature that distinguishes him from the ordinary. It is this kind of feature that makes him seem a little bit strange.  At the same time, it is this kind of feature that reveals the greatness of his thoughts which leads the pace of the times. Take Albert Einstein as an example. When his theory of relativity, the milestone in physics history, first came out to the world, hardly few people could understand it. Both his dishevel hair and seemingly weird thoughts are looked as the signs for individuality and cleverness. [中心明确，排比论证语势强烈，举例恰当，]
Also, in the field of economics, individuality has made considerable contributions to achieving personal success. [这个论述角度不错]A person who always goes after others will never find his rich gold mine but only some, if any, poor ones which are not chosen by the heralds. In the world of business, always to follow others is not a good strategy. For instance, the prices of stocks often change violently during a very short time. It's impractical to rely your decisions on observing and following others' conducts. To win personal success, individuality is a pivot which takes an individual out of the crowd of plain people. A successful entrepreneur has the ability to make his own way which shows his individuality. Without individuality, Brim and Page, the two founders of Google which is now the biggest internet searching engine in the globe, would not have the courage to finish their program, and we would not be able to get information so quickly as we actually are today.[后面google这个例子似乎和中心有点不一致，相反可以认为Brim and Page他们两人的comformity是他们成功的关键]

However, on the other hand, too much emphasis on individuality may bring about eccentricity and peculiarity which exceed normal standard. Conformity is also beneficial and indispensable to win personal economic success. Human is a sort of societal animal and we do business in the whole market, where exist some elements out of personal control. Conformity appeals the accordance with the environment, including the natural resources, national price climate and so on. Moreover, a person who has the character of conformity is good at tackling the relationship with others. No successful entrepreneur, no matter Bill Gates or Teddy Turner, goes to the extreme of individuality to simply try to catch people's eyes. They have learned the very importance of conformity and the useful skill to build a beneficial environment. [这段中强调很多的还是个人的成功是依靠其他人的交流，可否以众人的成功或者是集体得成功也是个人成功的一种体现来立意呢，个人意见，仅供参考]

In sum, both individuality and conformity deserve considerable attention. Not only neither of them can be overwhelmed by the other, but their sensitive relationship should be kept in a good balance as well. Since this is really a formidable task, it's natural to understand why there are so few individuals with great personal economic success.

[全文论点明确，结构清晰，用词准确。堪称为一篇上等文章。
特别佩服，quickbreeze得用词和句式，值得学习]
[另附  http://www.gter.edu.cn/bbs/thread-503869-1-1.html 请多指教]