Issue47 [认真作文互改小组f_ding 作业] 写的很没思路，求批！

f_dingUID: 2283047

Does society not lay enough emphasis on reasoning and other cognitive stills, as the speaker asserts? I concede that non-intellect, such as emotion and feelings, plays an important role in our society, however, based on personal experience and my daily observance, I agree that enough emphasis should be attached on intellect.

To begin with, intellect is indispensable in keeping our education more efficient and helping to achieve the true purpose of our education. One apt illustration involves a study, conducted by China's Ministry of Education in the year of 2005, which showed a peculiar phenomenon that among the ten thousand students in one hundred universities, ninety percent of them manifested few interests in intellect. According to the study, one critical reason leading to this phenomenon is that universities are paying to much attention the students' final testing performance, while ignoring the processes in which students are engaged in academic or extracurricular activities. Policies like this make students believe that final marks on the testing paper are more telling than the process. In other words, students are encouraged to focus just on the final paper rather than willingly receiving the knowledge imparted by professors, thus, to perform well they often take a commonly used practice-rote and what is worse, maybe cheat. In this situation, it is true and quite necessary that universities should render the intellect top-one policy, so that education can be best achieved in its function as a classroom where knowledge and wisdom from professors is transmitted to students.

Intellect serves as a powerful tool in sustaining our society as a whole more innovative and rapidly developing. Our insights on the nature and creatures on this earth are mainly derived from our reasoning and other cognitive skills, which are instrumental in our understanding of nature laws and their activities. One telling example involves Steven Hawking, an eminent physicist in celestial study, who is paralyzed most part of his body except his brain and several fingers. However, due to the intellect he possesses, he made a breakthrough in the physical realm and thanks to his theory, and hence our understandings towards black hole have altered dramatically. It is the same when it comes to today's theme of creativity. Creativity, generally defined as the use of knowledge to solve the problem in an unprecedented way, is largely based on intellect. Without intellect and thus lacking understanding of the nature as well as creative ways, our society will be far from innovative and will suffer from slow, and perhaps no, progress.

However, it should be admitted that we should never neglect the importance and functions of emotions and feelings, which do not belong to the category of intellect. Human beings, so-called advanced animals, are essentially distinguished from other animals in that human has richness of emotions and feelings. And emotions play very important roles in guaranteeing that we can do something determinedly, consistently and reasonably. Take the example of Hawking once more, generally speaking, one with such disabilities will suffer a lot physically and mentally, however, Hawking endured it not because of his intellect, but his passion for the pursuit of the unknown world. In this sense, emotions provide the space for intellect to take effect.

In sum, from what has be mentioned above, a conclusion can be drawn that we should attach the importance to intellect, in the meantime, we should never overlook the functions of emotions and feelings.

taroUID: 2286098

Does society not lay enough emphasis on reasoning and other cognitive stills(skills), as the speaker asserts? I concede that non-intellect, such as emotion and feelings, plays an important role in our society, however, based on personal experience and my daily observance, I agree that enough emphasis should be attached on intellect.

To begin with, intellect is indispensable in keeping our education more efficient and helping to achieve the true purpose of our education. One apt illustration involves a study, conducted by China's Ministry of Education in the year of 2005, which showed a peculiar phenomenon that among the ten thousand students in one hundred universities, ninety percent of them manifested few interests (little interest) in intellect. According to the study, one critical reason leading to this phenomenon is that universities are paying to much attention the students' final testing performance, while ignoring the processes in which students are engaged in academic or extracurricular activities. (绕，how about “of students’ academic or extracurricular activities) Policies like this make students believe that final marks on the testing paper are more telling than the process. In other words, students are encouraged to focus just on the final paper rather than willingly receiving the knowledge imparted by professors, thus, to perform well they often take a commonly used practice-rote and what is worse, maybe cheat. In this situation, it is true and quite necessary that universities should render the intellect top-one policy, so that education can be best achieved in its function as a classroom where knowledge and wisdom from professors is transmitted to students. (例子陈述过长，缩；适当添论证)

（过渡！）Intellect serves as a powerful tool in sustaining our society as a whole more innovative and rapidly developing. Our insights on the nature and creatures on this earth are mainly derived from our reasoning and other cognitive skills, which are instrumental in our understanding of nature laws and their activities. One telling example involves Steven Hawking, an eminent physicist in celestial study, who is paralyzed most part of his body except his brain and several fingers. However, due to the intellect he possesses, he made a breakthrough in the physical realm and thanks to his theory, and hence our understandings towards black hole have altered dramatically.(背景介绍减—霍金家喻户晓,重点放在写他用intellect作出的贡献) It is the same when it comes to today's theme of creativity. Creativity, generally defined as the use of knowledge to solve the problem in an unprecedented way, is largely based on intellect. Without intellect and thus lacking understanding of the nature as well as creative ways, our society will be far from innovative and will suffer from slow, and perhaps no, progress.

However, it should be admitted that we should never neglect the importance and functions of emotions and feelings, which do not belong to the category of intellect. (unnecessary) Human beings, so-called advanced animals, are essentially distinguished from other animals in that human has richness of emotions and feelings. And emotions play very important roles in guaranteeing that we can do something determinedly, consistently and reasonably. (?) Take the example of Hawking once more, generally speaking, one with such disabilities will suffer a lot physically and mentally, however, Hawking endured it not because of his intellect, but his passion for the pursuit of the unknown world. In this sense, emotions provide the space for intellect to take effect.

In sum, from what has be mentioned above, a conclusion can be drawn that we should attach the importance to intellect, in the meantime, we should never overlook the functions of emotions and feelings

三个Body段的TS感觉都有点泛,所以展开得也比较困难,思路的局限,暂时没有对策
特别是B3对emotion论述需改写, how can emotions guarantee people act reasonably?
例子的问题见文中注.
再难不也写出来了, 改一下就能上战场. 加油!!

wangchangxiaoUID: 2123968

Does society not lay enough emphasis on reasoning and other cognitive stills, as the speaker asserts? I concede that non-intellect, such as emotion and feelings, plays an important role in our society, however, based on personal experience and my daily observance, I agree that enough emphasis should be attached on intellect.(回应的不够明确,直接说你同意对智力的重视不够,虽然情绪感性也很重要,会不会好些呢.?)

To begin with, intellect is indispensable in keeping our education more efficient and helping to achieve the true purpose of our education. One apt illustration involves a study, conducted by China's Ministry of Education in the year of 2005, which showed a peculiar phenomenon that among the ten thousand students in one hundred universities, ninety percent of them manifested few interests in intellect. According to the study, one critical reason leading to this phenomenon is that universities are paying to much attention the students' final testing performance, while ignoring the processes in which students are engaged in academic or extracurricular activities. Policies like this make students believe that final marks on the testing paper are more telling than the process. In other words, students are encouraged to focus just on the final paper rather than willingly receiving the knowledge imparted by professors, thus, to perform well they often take a commonly used practice-rote and what is worse, maybe cheat. In this situation, it is true and quite necessary that universities should render the intellect top-one policy, so that education can be best achieved in its function as a classroom where knowledge and wisdom from professors is transmitted to students.(我觉得这个例子有点问题哈,这样好象是在证明学校在德育方面重视的不足哦.)

Intellect serves as a powerful tool in sustaining our society as a whole more innovative and rapidly developing. Our insights on the nature and creatures on this earth are mainly derived from our reasoning and other cognitive skills, which are instrumental in our understanding of nature laws and their activities. One telling example involves Steven Hawking, an eminent physicist in celestial study, who is paralyzed most part of his body except his brain and several fingers. However, due to the intellect he possesses, he made a breakthrough in the physical realm and thanks to his theory, and hence our understandings towards black hole have altered dramatically. It is the same when it comes to today's theme of creativity. Creativity, generally defined as the use of knowledge to solve the problem in an unprecedented way, is largely based on intellect. Without intellect and thus lacking understanding of the nature as well as creative ways, our society will be far from innovative and will suffer from slow, and perhaps no, progress.(这段论述的比较完整,但是论点好象不是很有力,不知道你的感觉呢)

However, it should be admitted that we should never neglect the importance and functions of emotions and feelings, which do not belong to the category of intellect. Human beings, so-called advanced animals, are essentially distinguished from other animals in that human has richness of emotions and feelings. And emotions play very important roles in guaranteeing that we can do something determinedly, consistently and reasonably. Take the example of Hawking once more, generally speaking, one with such disabilities will suffer a lot physically and mentally, however, Hawking endured it not because of his intellect, but his passion for the pursuit of the unknown world. In this sense, emotions provide the space for intellect to take effect.

In sum, from what has be mentioned above, a conclusion can be drawn that we should attach the importance to intellect, in the meantime, we should never overlook the functions of emotions and feelings.

总体上,F_DING的语言不是大问题, 这篇似乎写之前的准备不够充分,论点有些拼凑的嫌疑,建议F_DING重新考虑下,我的意见可能不对哈,如果有什么错误的地方,我们一起讨论哈,呵呵.F_DING加油.
批批我这篇吧:
http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=603139&extra=page%3D1