Issue177 留链互拍

wwltlUID: 2156586

177 "The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes."

提纲：
1、学术研究能够使我们更好地了解这个世界
2、每个人的大脑都有独特的思考和处理信息的方式，它对于我们研究学习的过程也会产生影响。
3、世界不会停留在原处因为科学研究的目的之一就是让人类的生活更美好，人类已经并正在利用科学研究来是世界改变。

I hold the same belief with above topic on the contribution that study of an academic discipline makes, after all to understand the world better is one of the goals of academic study. More than that, I think the way we perceive the world, play roles to influence the process of our study on the disciplines too. And once being clearer about the world we live, we always make some differences in the world to enable our lives easier and comforter.

One of the fundamental purposes of scientific study is to let us see the world with clearer, broader and sharper sights. As a matter of fact, the process of study on academic disciplines is the process that we keep finding new things and understanding more about this world. When Aristotle said heavy body always falls faster than light ones, he was thought to be right. But the study on physics never stops, and many years later Galileo Galilei proved this theory wrong. Since then, when we see one piece of feather falls much slower than a steel ball, we do not think it is caused by their difference in weight any more. Also thanks to the discovery of cell by Robert Hook and the following ones attained by other scientists, nowadays we can not only see cells consisting in numerous species, but also can understand how they function to make us walk, hear, see, and speak. Many other academic studies enable us more knowledgeable too. With aeronautics, we can see further into the universe and obtain a picture of our own earth from out space; with archaeology, we can be aware of our history and know how we revolute in such a long time; with chemistry, we understand fire is not only heat and light, but with an intense chemical reaction inside. Such discoveries exist in so many fields that I can not name them one by one. By studying them, the way we perceive the world on longer stays in the same level, they make us understand the world more and see it further.

When applauding the change made by study, however, we should also notice that our way to perceive the world usually influences how we study academic disciplines. After reading one same book, two people will give two distinct reviews, because their brains deal with information with different ways. A theory could be very clear and logical to one person, but be vague to another one. Even both being great in Alzheimer's Disease, my professor holds a belief that the crucial factor in the pathology is a protein called APP, while another professor I know, who research in the same field, thinks mutation in another protein named tau is the real murderer of  the nerve cells. Everyone's brain functions in its own particular ways, influenced by experience, education, feelings, and other unexplained factors. In that, we perceive the world in our own way. Although objectively speaking, truth is always the same for one subject, how we reach it and which part we focus on, is always different.

Another fundamental purpose of scientific study is to make our lives more convenient and comforter, which inevitably induces change. After study academic disciplines, when we are able to see the world with different eyes, there is almost no way for us to stay the same. We are always eager to make some differences. That is why we perform gene therapy, clone animals, build stations in out space, deal with globe warming, and achieve lots of other things which are hardly to imagine decades ago. If consequence of study is merely making us see the world clearer, there will not be computer, telephone, medicine, television, and even mobile to make us live easily. More than that, academic study will not continue, because for us there is no telescope to see further, no microscope to look into delicate world, and no computer to calculate faster. The nature of human being is trying to live better and longer, therefore, after studying on academics and being to understand the disciplines of the world more, the world must be changed.

To sum up, I believe academic study can change the way we perceive the world. Meanwhile, the way we feel and think decides how we perform these studies. After studying the disciplines, we not only posse different eyes, but also equip ourselves with stronger hands to change the world.

snownontraceUID: 2247677

pfpf，跟读范文似的……
第一段最后一个词"comforter"好像不对吧，"more comfortable"？
我其实在怀疑是不是lz使用了某种高深的修辞。。。

harrietannUID: 2204456

seat taken, lz作文修改中。。。

I hold the same beliefwith above topic on the contribution that study of an academic disciplinemakes, after all to understand the world better is one of the goals of academicstudy. More than that, I think the way we perceive the world, play roles to influencethe process of our study on the disciplines too.没看明白呢，跟上面那个比较的啊 And once beingclearer about the world we live, we always make some differences in the worldto enable our lives easier and comforter.安慰者的意思，改成more comfortable;用the more…the more…是不是好些One ofthe fundamental purposes of scientific study is to let us see the world withclearer, broader and sharper sights. As a matter of fact, the process of studyon academic disciplines is the process that we keep finding new things andunderstanding more about this world. When Aristotle said heavy body alwaysfalls faster than light ones, he was thought to be right. But the study onphysics never stops, and many years later Galileo Galilei proved this theorywrong. Since then, when we see one piece of feather falls much slower than asteel ball, we do not think it is caused by their difference in weight anymore. Also thanks to the discovery of cell by Robert Hook and the followingones attained by other scientists, nowadays we can not only see cellsconsisting in numerous species, but also can可省略 understand how they function tomake us walk, hear, see, and speak. Many other academic studies enable us moreknowledgeable too. With aeronautics, we can see further into the universe andobtain a picture of our own earth from out space外空间？没查到这个词，可以说from out ofthe space;with archaeology, we can be aware of our history and know how we revolute insuch a long time; with chemistry, we understand fire is not only heat andlight, but with an intense chemical reaction inside. Such discoveries exist inso many fields that I can not name them one by one. By studying them, the waywe perceive the world on longer stays in the same level, they make usunderstand the world more and see it further.Whenapplauding the change made by study, however, we should also notice that ourway to perceive the world usually influences how we study academic disciplines.After reading (one) thesame book, two people will give two distinct reviews, because their brains dealwith information (with)in different ways. A theory could be very clearand logical to one person, but be vague to another one. Even both being greatin Alzheimer's Disease, my professor holds a belief that the crucial factor inthe pathology is a protein called APP, while another professor I know, whoresearch in the same field, thinks mutation in another protein named tau is thereal murderer of  the nerve cells. Everyone's brain functions in itsown particular ways, influenced by experience, education, feelings, and otherunexplained factors. In that, we perceive the world in our own way. Althoughobjectively speaking, truth is always the same for one subject, how we reach itand which part we focus on, is always different.Anotherfundamental purpose of scientific study is to make our lives more convenientand comforter, which inevitably induces change.After studying academic disciplines, when weare able to see the world with different eyes, there is almost no way for us tostay the same. We are always eager to make some differences. That is why weperform gene therapy, clone animals, build stations in out space, deal withglobe warming, and achieve lots of other things which are hardly to imaginedecades ago. If consequence of study is merely making us see the world clearer,there will not be computer, telephone, medicine, television, and even mobile tomake us live easily. More than that, academic study will not continue, becausefor us there is no telescope to see further, no microscope to look intodelicate world, and no computer to calculate faster. The nature of human beingis trying to live better and longer, therefore, after studying on academics andbeing to understand the disciplines of the world more, the world must bechanged.我觉得只说我们现在有了新发明和说世界改变了还是有区别的，应该可以再说透彻些To sumup, I believe academic study can change the way we perceive the world.Meanwhile, the way we feel and think decides how we perform these studies.After studying the disciplines, we not only posse different eyes, but alsoequip ourselves with stronger hands to change the world.

优点就不赘述啦

开头说同意论者观点，但后面反对的成分多些，迷惑中

词汇的使用上比较级略多，可以考虑其他表达方式
如果对我的修改有不同看法尽管提出，大家共同提高

[ 本帖最后由 harrietann 于 2007-2-10 14:13 编辑 ]

lovephysicsUID: 2141260

177 "The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes."

提纲：1、学术研究能够使我们更好地了解这个世界

            2、每个人的大脑都有独特的思考和处理信息的方式，它对于我们研究学习的过程也会产生影响。

            3、世界不会停留在原处因为科学研究的目的之一就是让人类的生活更美好，人类已经并正在利用科学研究来是世界改变。

I hold the same belief with (the) above topic on the contribution that study of an academic discipline makes, after all to understand the world better is one of the goals of academic study. (这句语法似乎不对，是study of --- makes---better吗) More than that, I think the way we perceive the world, play roles to influence the process of our study on the disciplines too. And once being clearer about the world we live, we always make some differences in the world to enable our lives easier and comforter.（受段开宗明义，指出了下文的3个TS,尤其第二个观点我个人觉得较好。语法上小有一些不足）

另外有个问题，原题we see the same world as before, but with different eyes好像不必然代表“更好”

One of the fundamental purposes of scientific study is to let us see the world with clearer, broader and sharper sights. As a matter of fact, the process of study on academic disciplines is the process that we keep finding new things and understanding more about this world. （这句有个不足，你的语言描述的是see more, see new, 这和we see the same world as before, but with different eyes有些矛盾，建议避免使用new,more这两个词）When Aristotle said heavy body always falls faster than light ones, he was thought to be right. But the study on physics never stops, and many years later Galileo Galilei proved this theory wrong.（历史上这个试验不是伽利略做的，这只是个传说。不知道引用这个例子恰不恰当） Since then, when we see one piece of feather falls much slower than a steel ball, we do not think it is caused by their difference in weight any more. Also thanks to the discovery of cell by Robert Hook and the following ones attained by other scientists, nowadays we can not only see cells consisting in numerous species, but also can understand how they function to make us walk, hear, see, and speak. Many other academic studies enable us more knowledgeable too. With aeronautics, we can see further into the universe and obtain a picture of our own earth from out space; with archaeology, we can be aware of our history and know how we revolute in such a long time; with chemistry, we understand fire is not only heat and light, but with an intense chemical reaction inside. Such discoveries exist in so many fields that I can not name them one by one. By studying them, the way we perceive the world on longer stays in the same level, they make us understand the world more and see it further.

最好能用一些文字，把they make us understand the world more and see it further.和 we see the same world as before, but with different eyes等价起来

When applauding the change made by study, however, we should also notice that our way to perceive the world usually influences how we study academic disciplines. After reading one same book, two people will give two distinct reviews, because their brains deal with （the same）information with different ways. A theory could be very clear and logical to one person, but be vague to another one. Even both being great in Alzheimer's Disease(是in the study of Alzheimer's Disease吧，怎么能在病上great呢,great也比较恶俗，distinguished好些吧), my professor holds a belief that the crucial factor in the pathology is a protein called APP, while another professor I know, who research in the same field, thinks mutation in another protein named TAU is the real murderer of  the nerve cells. Everyone's brain functions in its own particular ways, influenced by experience, education, feelings, and other unexplained factors. In that, we perceive the world in our own way. Although objectively speaking, truth is always the same for one subject, how we reach it and which part we focus on, is always different.

Another fundamental purpose of scientific study is to make our lives more convenient and comforter, which inevitably induces change. After study academic disciplines, when we are able to see the world with different eyes, there is almost no way for us to stay the same. We are always eager to make some differences. That is why we perform gene therapy, clone animals, build stations in out space, deal with globe warming, and achieve lots of other things which are hardly to imagine decades ago. If consequence of study is merely making us see the world clearer, there will not be computer, telephone, medicine, television, and even mobile to make us live easily. More than that, academic study will not continue, because for us there is no telescope to see further, no microscope to look into delicate world, and no computer to calculate faster. The nature of human being is trying to live better and longer, therefore, after studying on academics and being to understand the disciplines of the world more, the world must be changed.

To sum up, I believe academic study can change the way we perceive the world. Meanwhile, the way we feel and think decides how we perform these studies. After studying the disciplines, we not only posse different eyes, but also equip ourselves with stronger hands to change the world.

最重要的问题是你把academic仅仅理解为scientific了，社会科学怎么能不写？

we see the same world as before, but with different eyes不是和社会科学的对同一事物有不同观点强烈对应吗？

[ 本帖最后由 lovephysics 于 2007-2-12 15:52 编辑 ]