issue103 大家麻烦看下,我感觉自己写得极为别扭,也不知为啥

phoenixlwUID: 2382912

题目：ISSUE 103 - "The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives."
字数：492          用时：0:45:00          日期：2007-9-2

I tend to fundamentally disagree with the assertion that the study of history can be valuable only to the extent that it is relevant to people's daily life. Apparently the assertion is based on an unreliable assumption that history is divided into two parts: one is relevant to people' daily life while other is irrelevant. However, my point of view on this issue is that history is valuable for human, and people should realize that it influences people directly or indirectly rather than so-called conception that is "relevant" or "irrelevant".

On the one hand, if the relevant history represents the history which has direct impact on people, it is true that the history relevant to people's daily lives bring myriads of benefit to people. Since the history offers people various successful examples of individuals or companies, which could lead them a right way to realize their dreams and achieve their goals, people often tend to study this kind of history to improve themselves. For instance, people read autobiography of Bill Gates, and learn decision and wise; people read Einstein’s, and realize the significance of mulling over things alone; people read Roosevelt’s, and understand it is the enormous mettle and persistence that erect his the immortal fame and sublime deference. There is a famous saying goes that if one is eager for success, then copy it from these great individuals in history. Thus, the relevant history plays a vital role in helping people directly establish their success.

On the other hand, the so-called irrelevant history is the history that people could gain benefit less directly or indirectly. Generally speaking, learning this history could help people escape from some gratuitous mistakes or even tragedies, and thus people also should put much emphasis on this kind of history. As business realm is concerned, students who major in business nowadays are offered legions of cases on companies to study. Among these cases, there are success and failures, but either is worth study. No more than these case analyses, the management mechanism and marketing policies of Coca Cola can become known to all, the harmonious atmosphere of the Google Company can be esteemed, the strict and cautious attitude of IBM can be respected. Therefore, the present firms could avoid inefficiency in personnel distribution and marketing plans by studying Coca Cola, escape from lack of cooperation among employees by improving workmate relationship like Google, and establish a credit requires delicacy to ameliorate quality. Furthermore, when it comes to Germany, which is used to be guilty of the Second World War, the prosperity and stability of this country are close associated with its penitence for the past evils. The Germany remembers its history, which is  shameful yet ensures the prosperity and reverence of Germany nowadays. This kind of ostensibly relevant history reminds people of evil of wars and further prevents more wars from happening. Consequently, the so-called irrelevant history also can bring people positive effects as well as the relevant one.

In sum, since history is constituted of series of incidents which existed and influenced the situation of its time, it is worth people's adequate attention. From history, people can gain myriads of and various knowledge and experiences directly or indirectly, and no matter in a direct or indirect way,  people gains priceless behalf. Thus, people should handle history more seriously and carefully for a better future of human.     

[ 本帖最后由 phoenixlw 于 2007-9-3 11:05 编辑 ]

小猫儿UID: 2297873

I tend to fundamentally disagree with the assertion that the study of history can be valuable only to the extent that it is relevant to people's daily life. Apparently the assertion is based on an unreliable assumption that history is divided into two parts: one is relevant to people' daily life while other is irrelevant. However, my point of view on this issue is that history is valuable for human, and people should realize that it influences people directly or indirectly rather than so-called conception that is "relevant" or "irrelevant".

On the one hand, if the relevant history represents the history which has direct impact on people, it is true that the history relevant to people's daily lives bring myriads of benefit to people. Since the history offers people various successful examples of individuals or companies, which could lead them a right way to realize their dreams and achieve their goals, people often tend to study this kind of history to improve themselves. For instance, people read autobiography of Bill Gates, （感觉应该说明这一例子的direct impact on people）and learn decision and wise; people read Einstein’s, and realize the significance of mulling over things alone; people read Roosevelt’s, and understand it is the enormous mettle and persistence that erect his the immortal fame and sublime deference. There is a famous saying goes that if one is eager for success, then copy it from these great individuals in history. Thus, the relevant history plays a vital role in helping people directly establish their success.（论证中规中矩，稳步推进，不错）

On the other hand, the so-called irrelevant history is the history that people could gain benefit less directly or indirectly. Generally speaking, learning this history could help people escape from some gratuitous mistakes or even tragedies, and thus people also should put much emphasis on this kind of history. As business realm is concerned, students who major in business nowadays are offered legions of cases on companies to study. Among these cases, there are success and failures, but either is worth study. No more than these case analyses, the management mechanism and marketing policies of Coca Cola can become known to all, the harmonious atmosphere of the Google Company can be esteemed, the strict and cautious attitude of IBM can be respected. Therefore, the present firms could avoid inefficiency in personnel distribution and marketing plans by studying Coca Cola, escape from lack of cooperation among employees by improving workmate relationship like Google, and establish a credit requires delicacy to ameliorate quality. Furthermore, when it comes to Germany, which is used to be guilty of the Second World War, the prosperity and stability of this country are close associated with its penitence for the past evils. The Germany remembers its history, which is  shameful yet ensures the prosperity and reverence of Germany nowadays. This kind of ostensibly relevant history（同上段一样没有说明这些例子为何就与daily life无关） reminds people of evil of wars and further prevents more wars from happening. Consequently, the so-called irrelevant history also can bring people positive effects as well as the relevant one.

In sum, since history is constituted of series of incidents which existed and influenced the situation of its time, it is worth people's adequate attention. From history, people can gain myriads of and various knowledge and experiences directly or indirectly, and no matter in a direct or indirect way,  people gains priceless behalf. Thus, people should handle history more seriously and carefully for a better future of human.     
个人感觉从LZ的阐述角度很难写，第二部分要说本来无关的历史实际有关，我觉得这个本身就很难写，还不如就从简单的观点来写，呵呵
LZ的论证不错，擅长用的排比也增色不少~~~
替PERFUMEDEW同学给LZ改一下，希望你别介意啊^_^
大家都加油哦~~~

[ 本帖最后由 小猫儿 于 2007-9-4 00:00 编辑 ]

phoenixlwUID: 2382912

呵呵,谢谢小猫儿咯~~~
确实感觉那2个论述段的直接和不直接关系不是很清楚, 该再多点几句.