ARGUMENT170 第一次写ARGUMENT 呵呵...欢迎大家多多提意见啊...不胜感谢!
words:500 times: 2hours
The notion that as the consumer know that the bacteria in oyster can be killed, so that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will follow greater profits seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion. To support this assertion, the author assumed that consumer will pay the same price for Gulf Coast oyster since they consider it is safe. However, the argument relies on a serious of unsubstantiated assumptions which render it unconvincing as it stands.
First of all, the author assumed that the price of Gulf Coast oyster will promote. However, the author provide no evidence that this is the case. Since harmful bacteria were found in a few raw Gulf Coast oysters cause the Atlantic Coast oyster price promote as twice as before. However, the Atlantic Coast oyster price may decline because the safe Gulf Coast oyster and the Gulf Coast oyster price may still retain.
In the second place, even if the bacteria can be killed, the author assumed that consumer may buy the Gulf Coast oyster. But the author provides no evidence substantiates this assumption. Perhaps the Gulf Coast oyster doesn’t test well enough, or perhaps Gulf Coast oyster doesn’t preserve so well that consumer don’t want to buy them any longer. Moreover, perhaps the consumer stopped to buy them even before bacteria. In either event, the author could not justifiably rely on the mere fact that the scientist has now devised a process for killing the bacteria.
In the third place, the author assumed that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profits. However, this is not necessarily the case. It is entirely possible that the producers can’t get greater profits even someone would like to pay higher price than now for them. Since the highly cost of bacteria’s kill. Thus, the strength of the author’s claim of greater profits of Gulf Coast oyster depends on the kill of bacteria that the author does not provide.
In the fourth place, based on the fact the consumer are likely to be willing to pay as much for Gulf Coast as for northeastern Atlantic Coast oyster the author infers that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profits. However, this is not necessarily the case. It is possible that reputation is easy to destroy but hard to regain. Even aware of the devise to kill bacteria, consumers may still afraid of this problem. So they would still not buy Gulf Coast oyster. It will maybe a long time and need lots of work to conciliate their fear.
In conclusion, the deduction of the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profit is not well supported. To convince me that the Gulf Coast oyster will get profits, the author must provide clear statistics evidence that the cost of killing bacteria is very low that all the producers can bear it. to better evaluate the conclusion, I would need more information about how the Gulf Coast oyster producers make consumer willing to buy their oyster without fear.
words:500 times: 2hours
The notion that as the consumer know that the bacteria in oyster can be killed, so that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will follow greater profits seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion. To support this assertion, the author assumed that consumer will pay the same price for Gulf Coast oyster since they consider it is safe. However, the argument relies on a serious of unsubstantiated assumptions which render it unconvincing as it stands.
First of all, the author assumed that the price of Gulf Coast oyster will promote. However, the author provide no evidence that this is the case. Since harmful bacteria were found in a few raw Gulf Coast oysters cause the Atlantic Coast oyster price promote as twice as before. However, the Atlantic Coast oyster price may decline because the safe Gulf Coast oyster and the Gulf Coast oyster price may still retain.[论证过程基本没有展开,既然你已经发现了攻击点,为什么不去深入讨论呢?]
In the second place, even if the bacteria can be killed, the author assumed that consumer may buy the Gulf Coast oyster. But the author provides no evidence substantiates this assumption. Perhaps the Gulf Coast oyster doesn’t test well enough, or perhaps Gulf Coast oyster doesn’t preserve so well that consumer don’t want to buy them any longer. Moreover, perhaps the consumer stopped to buy them even before bacteria.[可以在这里加些不买的原因] In either event, the author could not justifiably rely on the mere fact that the scientist has now devised a process for killing the bacteria.
In the third place, the author assumed that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profits. However, this is not necessarily the case. It is entirely possible that the producers can’t get greater profits even someone would like to pay higher price than now for them. Since the highly cost of bacteria’s kill.[表达的有问题] Thus, the strength of the author’s claim of greater profits of Gulf Coast oyster depends on the kill of bacteria that the author does not provide.
In the fourth place, based on the fact the consumer are likely to be willing to pay as much for Gulf Coast as for northeastern Atlantic Coast oyster the author infers that the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profits. However, this is not necessarily the case. It is possible that reputation is easy to destroy but hard to regain. Even aware of the devise to kill bacteria, consumers may still afraid of this problem. So they would still not buy Gulf Coast oyster. It will maybe a long time and need lots of work to conciliate their fear.
In conclusion, the deduction of the Gulf Coast oyster producers will get greater profit is not well supported. To convince me that the Gulf Coast oyster will get profits, the author must provide clear statistics evidence that the cost of killing bacteria is very low that all the producers can bear it. to better evaluate the conclusion, I would need more information about how the Gulf Coast oyster producers make consumer willing to buy their oyster without fear.
第一次写成这样已经很好了!
以后注意写argument重在分析,攻击题目要有充足的理由,不能干巴巴的列大条目。
一般写成五大段式,这样符合考试时的实际情况!
加油吧!:) :handshake