argument153 [0806G-奋斗小组]第20次作业

breathUID: 2417355

作业二十：
Argument153：The following is from an editorial in the Midvale Observer, a local newspaper.

"Ever since the 1950's, when television sets began to appear in the average home, the rate of crimes committed by teenagers in the country of Alta has steadily increased. This increase in teenage crime parallels the increase in violence shown on television. According to several national studies, even very young children who watch a great number of television shows featuring violent scenes display more violent behavior within their home environment than do children who do not watch violent shows. Furthermore, in a survey conducted by the Observer, over 90 percent of the respondents were parents who indicated that prime-time television—programs that are shown between 7 p.m. and 9 p.m.—should show less violence. Therefore, in order to lower the rate of teenage crime in Alta, television viewers should demand that television programmers reduce the amount of violence shown during prime time."
作业提交时间：2007年11月23日24：00以前
1.That the cause of rate crimes is televisions emergence is doubtful.
2. Flaws in the national studies.
3. The effect of the measure to control the rate of crimes.
The claim that television programmers should reduce the amount of violence shown during prime time because of the increase in teenage crime paralleling the increase in violence shown on television, while appearing in some respects, is an arbitrary statement. The arguer lacks some more detailed evidence to support his claim.

First, the arguer state that after television sets began to appear in the average home, the rate of crimes committed by teenagers in the country of Alta has steadily increased, which means because of the emergence of television the children do more crimes. I strongly disagree about this point. Maybe the relation between televisions and the rate of crimes is only a time-relationship which means that the two things have no other relevant connections but only one happened earlier and then the other occurs. Consider exchanging of situation, if the rate of crimes increased first, then the television sets began to appear, can we make this conclusion that it is the increase of crimes lead to the appearance of television? Apparently, it must be very ridiculous to make this statement. Also there are some other possibilities. Maybe with drastic growing of economic, there is much more temptation in daily life, therefore the child could not help to resist the allurement and then the rate of crimes increase. So the speaker should provide more evidence to support his statement that the increasing rate is as the result of emergence of the televisions.

Secondly, I still doubt about the several national studies. By comparing the young children who watch a great number of television shows with the children who do not watch violent shows, the speaker infer that television shows indeed contribute to the increasing rate of crimes. In my viewpoint, a terrible logical flaw exists in the method. The speaker compares two different groups of children, how can we know there are no other different factors between the two groups to influence the result. Maybe there are more children who have bad characters and have a more tendency to make anti-social behaviors in one group because these children are unhappy or hurt by some terrible matters, then the rate of that group will much higher than the other group. So I suggest that the arguer should compare the rate of the same groups before and after they watch the television shows to draw his conclusion.

Even though the television shows truly make the rate of crimes increase, I still sucpect the effects of reducing televisions programs to control the rate of crimes. If the children have already addicted to violent programs, the method that we presumptuously reduce the television shows only leads to more terrible problems. There is a possibility that the children will not go home but go to the unpleasant places to watch the violent programs in spare time or the children steal money to buy the violent and unhealthy videos themselves. So I insist that the most efficient way to prevent the children watching televisions is through educational method. And the adults can interpret the harmful results of watching violent programs and do not watch violent programs to set an example for the children.

In sum, the arguer is too presumptuous to draw the conclusion that the violent television shows bring on the increasing rate of crimes, the speaker should provide more persuasive evidences to enhance the cause-relationship between television shows and rate of crimes. The method of reducing violent televisions programs is also not practical or useless.

phong88UID: 2411607

The claim that television programmers should reduce the amount of violence shown during prime time because of the increase in teenage crime paralleling the increase in violence shown on television, while appearing in some respects, is an arbitrary statement. The arguer lacks some（可省） more detailed evidence to support his claim.

First, the arguer state that after television sets began to appear in the average home, the rate of crimes committed by teenagers in the country of Alta has steadily increased, which means because of the emergence of television the children do more crimes. I strongly disagree about this point. Maybe the relation between televisions and the rate of crimes is only a time-relationship which means that the two things have no other relevant connections but only （这样用对吗？）one happened earlier and then the other occurs. Consider exchanging of situation（觉得有点奇怪-exchanging of ）, if the rate of crimes increased first, then the television sets began to appear, can we make this conclusion that it is the increase of crimes lead to the appearance of television? Apparently, it must be very ridiculous to make this statement. Also there are some other possibilities. Maybe with drastic growing of economic, there is much more temptation in daily life, therefore the child could not help to resist(resisiting) the allurement and then the rate of crimes increase. So the speaker should provide more evidence to support his statement that the increasing rate is as (去掉)the result of emergence of the televisions.

Secondly, I still doubt about the several national studies. By comparing the young children who watch a great number of television shows with the children who do not watch violent shows, the speaker infer that television shows indeed contribute to the increasing rate of crimes. In my viewpoint, a terrible logical flaw exists in the method. The speaker compares two different groups of children, how can we know there are no other different factors between the two groups to influence the result.（中文式英语的感觉）Maybe there are more children who have bad characters and have a more tendency(more tendency?) to make anti-social behaviors in one group because these children are unhappy or hurt by some terrible matters, then the rate of that group will (be)much higher than the other group. So I suggest that the arguer should compare the rate of the same groups before and after they watch the television shows to draw his conclusion.（这段考虑的漏洞正确，但是表达上欠佳）

Even though the television shows truly make the rate of crimes increase, I still sucpect(suspect) the effect of reducing televisions programs to control the rate of crimes. If the children have already been addicted to violent programs, the method that we presumptuously reduce the television shows only leads to more terrible problems. There is a possibility that the children will not go home but go to the unpleasant places to watch the violent programs in spare time or the children steal money to buy the violent and unhealthy videos themselves. So I insist that the most efficient way to prevent the children watching televisions is through educational method(education ). And the adults can interpret the harmful results of watching violent programs and do not watch violent programs to set an example for the children.

In sum, the arguer is too presumptuous to draw the conclusion that the violent television shows bring on the increasing rate of crimes, the speaker should provide more persuasive evidence to enhance the cause-relationship between television shows and rate of crimes.(Otherwise), The method of reducing violent televisions programs is also(去掉) not practical or useless.
总体架构清楚，漏洞也基本找出攻击，只是表达上欠足,以致论证不够有力。加油！共同进步！
希望楼主有时间帮我改一下——
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-768206-1-1.html 不尽谢谢！
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