argument14 [savior小组] 第五次作业

brilliantsUID: 2347224

aru 14
In the memo appeared above, the owner of Green Thumb Gardening Center  made a conclusion that the number of consumers interested in growing own vegetables will increase, in order to meet the needs of consumers and to get more profits it is necessary to expand the seeds stock this coming spring. to spport this conclusion the owner cites a survey that many consumers were dissatisfied with the quality of vegetables in the supermarkets and the gardening magazine has sold out at the stand. But in my opinion, these evidences are far enough for him to drew a conclusion.
First of all, the quality of fresh vegetables is not good does not mean consumers will not buy vegetables in supermarket. There might be a situation that more than one supermarket in the area is avilable for consumers to pick out vegetables they are satisfied with, if goods in some supurmarket are dissatisfed they will go to another one, or perhaps they would give advice to the market after all they will buy vegetable in it. If the fact mentioned in the survey is truth, consumers can find the privite supplyer or go to special vegetable store, maybe the price is cheaper than supermarket, and then no use to grow their own  vegetables.
In this survey , the statistic is rely upon a nation, but the national situation may be just contradict to a suburban town. If consumers in the suburban town are very satisfied with the quality of fresh vegetable they will not develop the interet in growing vegetables of their own.It is unacceptable to reach such conclusion.
For another, the gardening magazine sold out is not appears obviouse evidence consumers will become interest in growing vegetables. Perhaps they are more and more interested in flower and gardening, the Great Gardens magazine just adds a certain context in it. Or perhaps editer in this magazine has change , they are doing selling act these days and the cover of magazines become colourful and attructive. In addition, the owner fails to tell me the number of selling magazines at the Village News stand laterly three months. Assuming that the book stand has cut the storage these three month because Green Gardens has not sold well before in the suburban town, or other book stands closed three months ago, these will all contribute to the gardening magazine sold out.Therefore,the evidence to achieve such conclusion  is so weak and unconvinced.
At last, despite the consumers are interested in growing their own vegetables, it is hardly say the owner of Greeb Thumb Center can increase profits by expanding the variety of stock seeds.For one thing, the owner does not know whether the price nest spring is lower or higher than before.For another, there is no evidence consumer will buy large amount of seeds.Consumers interests in growing has no relavent to the increasing profits of the gardening center.
To sum up, the owner of this gardening center fails to provide enough evidence to spport the commendation. To make it more convinced, it had better  get a further study and sum exact statistics, then  find some relative fact. Or other, it is one-sided  to believe.

sallyplumageUID: 2343965

aru 14
In the memo appeared above, the owner of Green Thumb Gardening Center  made a conclusion that due to the number of consumers interested in growing own vegetables will increase（这是原因，不是结论！加个连词due to，但其实直接写出结论就行了，开头还是直接命中关键重要些）, in order to meet the needs of consumers and to get more profits it is necessary to expand the seeds stock this coming spring. To support this conclusion the owner cites a survey that many consumers were dissatisfied with the quality of vegetables in the supermarkets and the gardening magazine has sold out at the stand. But in my opinion, these evidences are far enough for him to drew a conclusion.

First of all, the quality of fresh vegetables is not good does not mean consumers will not buy vegetables in supermarket. There might be a situation that more than one supermarket in the area is avilable for consumers to pick out vegetables they are satisfied with, if goods in some supurmarket are dissatisfed they will go to another one, or perhaps they would give advice to the market after all they will buy vegetable in it. If the fact mentioned in the survey is truth, consumers can find the privite supplyer or go to special vegetable store. Maybe the price is cheaper than supermarket, and then no users to grow their own vegetables. (论证对但太杂，最后的没有和论点对上)

In this survey , the statistic is rely upon a nation, but the national situation may be just contradict to a suburban town. If consumers in the suburban town are very satisfied with the quality of fresh vegetable they will not develop the interet in growing vegetables of their own.It is unacceptable to reach such conclusion.（应该再说点）

For another, the gardening magazine sold out is not appears obviouse evidence consumers will become interest in growing vegetables. Perhaps they are more and more interested in flower and gardening, the Great Gardens magazine just adds a certain context in it. Or perhaps editer in this magazine has change, they are doing selling act these days and the cover of magazines become colourful and attructive. In addition, the owner fails to tell me the number of selling magazines at the Village News stand laterly three months. Assuming that the book stand has cut the storage these three month because Green Gardens has not sold well before in the suburban town, or other book stands closed three months ago, these will all contribute to the gardening magazine sold out. Therefore, the evidence to achieve such conclusion  is so weak and unconvinced.

At last, despite the consumers are interested in growing their own vegetables, it is hardly say the owner of Greeb Thumb Center can increase profits by expanding the variety of stock seeds. For one thing, the owner does not know whether the price nest spring （这是什么意思？）is lower or higher than before. For another, there is no evidence consumer will buy large amount of seeds. Consumers interests in growing has no relavent to the increasing profits of the gardening center.

To sum up, the owner of this gardening center fails to provide enough evidence to spport the commendation. To make it more convinced, it had better to get a further study and sum exact statistics, and then find some relative fact. Or other, it is one-aspect to believe.

不幸告诉你，你写错题了，应是a140。
注意连接词，应该在保证质量的情况下提高速度。
没逻辑错误，思路都不错，但整篇文章感觉话说得有点??拢?患蚪啵??印＝ㄒ槎嗫纯锤叻肿魑摹?/font]
没必要论证那么多点，但每个都要精。

[ 本帖最后由 sallyplumage 于 2008-3-9 14:10 编辑 ]

sallyplumageUID: 2343965

你的issue那边还是没法发，就发到这里吧

iss 4
At the time full of knowledge about mathematics, physics, and bioteque, it is impossible for us to know about some field just from one aspect of study. These knowledge no matter you are farmilar with or you are just heard of even get no relative about, they are becoming increasingly important part of people's life. Thus, I strongly agree with the speaker, because no field of study can break through without the assistant knowledge and technology from outsiders, especially when the study seems to be in a marsh, where there is no intrinsic power strong enough to pull it out of dilemmma.

There is no doubt that the rapid development today is more or less attribute to their knowledge and experieces brought from other study. The most persuative instant is in the field of computer science, permitted for many other science technoledge, which make the result precise and reliable. When scienctific analogy is added to the feild of biotech, it is become much easier to sum and analogy dates. It is not only speeding up the path of reaching a new discovery but in this way people labor are saved to other valubale things. For that matter, biology can be related to some other subject such as chemistry and mathematics. In a global view, actually all subjects of studies are related and we will find it difficult to define the exact boundary of them. （很好的观点，用计算机的运用与其他领域来说明各学科的交叉，但开头主题句好像不太好，their指的是谁？既然说从其他学科带来的知识和经验，后面的例子我觉得是不是应该说研究生物领域中用到了计算机等其它学科，这样比较对应，只是个人观点，有点死板，仅供参考）

Moreover, we can obviously see that coorperation and communication of people from different subject become more crucial than anutime before, Therefore, strenthen such a co-work and adoption seems necessary in all parts of the world, in shch a case, scientist and resaerchers all can save a lot of many（？你是想指与很多人吗？） and energy on the same experment, if one succeeds, then the others can take advantage of it conveniently. Just stay in a narrow world can hardly make further progress and occure insight thoughts, only when comprehensive intercourse can make road of science wider and wider.（学科之间的合作，但最好有个具体事例，一味说理可不行）

However, not all the scientifit techique would interchange or rely in other special field, some examples are enough to exlain this piont. In the old days, subjects are all essential to knowledge and individual developed. But there are also appeared classical thoery such as Newton's Gravity thoery and Einstein's Relativity, which are not rely on any outsiders those days , however, all peopel today consider them the deepest and most authority thoety in the world. There is no need for them to relate with other field study as the speaker said, but can allthe same develop well.（让步，但牛顿爱因斯坦没有给出为什么没依靠外界学科，你的前提有点牵强（可以说些科技不发达，缺乏联络手段），牛顿还好，爱因斯坦可是现代的人！）

In conclusion, in today's society, even if the simplest principle is generally based on a accumulating progress, we still should bring outsiders' knowledge to get improve, however,  not all the science knowledge through humans history need to cooperate with others and some special knowledge plays a basic role and cannot be neglected. We can safely drew a conclusion that only both sides are fully concerned, our society, our scholars could have a glorious future.
单词拼写错很多，没给你改，自己改一下印象深。总体思想不错，但有些地方干酒还是有些欠缺，下次把你的提纲列出来，我好知道你的大概思路。

brilliantsUID: 2347224

质量较差，让你痛苦了一回吧:loveliness:
下次我会把提纲列出。