argument65[FF小组]第二次作业---by lkjoyce

lkjoyceUID: 2343550

TOPIC: ARGUMENT65 - The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.

"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."


In this argument, the arguer get conclusion that the best way to improve profits in all of their stores is to discontinue stocking many of their imported cheese and concentrate on the domestic cheeses. To support this conclusion, the arguer points out that last year the domestic cheddar cheeses in their newest store were sold best. And he also presents a survey by a magazine to reinforce his opinion. The argument seems well-present, but it suffers from some logical flaws as follows.

To begin with, the arguer draws a hasty conclusion which is based on inadequate evidence about the cheeses sales situation. Firstly, the condition of the five new stores cannot represent all the stores. It is possible that the five new stores are in some small cities and the salaries of the people lived in those cities are not high so that they prefer the relative cheaper domestic cheeses rather than more expensive imported cheeses. Secondly, the sales of only one kind of domestic cheddar cheeses cannot represent other domestic cheeses. Perhaps the cheddar cheeses are very good and popular with the customer but the other domestic cheeses actually do not sold well.

Moveover, the survey is not convincing enough. The sample of the survey is open to doubts. The magazine subscribers' preference cannot prove all the customers' likeness. Perhaps most of the subscribers are the domestic cheeses business men so that they support the domestic products more. Without a valid survey, the arguer cannot convince me to believe his conclusion.

In addition, the arguer fails to consider about the profit difference between domestic cheeses and imported cheeses. It's possible that the profits of larger amount of domestic cheeses can only get the same profits of a little amount of imported cheeses. Therefore, to discontinue stocking the imported cheese may decrease the whole profits. And there is another possibility that the imported cheeses might have their own steady customs group, the loss of these customs may also affect the whole profits and then undermine the conclusion.

To sum up, this argument is not substantial as it stands. To bolster the conclusion, the arguer should give a more accurate survey to prove the customers prefer the domestic cheeses. He also should take into account that all other stores of this chain of cheese stores and the individual profit different between the domestic and imported cheeses.

wulfharthUID: 2460527

TOPIC: ARGUMENT65 - The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.

"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."


In this argument, the arguer get conclusion【直接用conclude就好】 that the best way to improve profits in all of their stores is to discontinue stocking many of their imported cheese and concentrate on the domestic cheeses. To support this conclusion, the arguer points out that last year the domestic cheddar cheeses in their newest store were sold best. And he also presents a survey by a magazine to reinforce his opinion. The argument seems well-present, but it suffers from some logical flaws as follows.

To begin with, the arguer draws a hasty conclusion which is based on inadequate evidence about the cheeses sales situation. Firstly, the condition of the five new stores【题目说的是最新店的五个销售最佳，而不是五个店】 cannot represent all the stores. It is possible that the five new stores【同】 are in some small cities and the salaries of the people lived in those cities【稍微有点重复，可以用there替代】 are not high so that they prefer the relative cheaper domestic cheeses rather than more expensive imported cheeses.【好长的一句话:eek: ，但是让我觉得是有些刻意拉长的感觉，环环套的太多容易产生歧义】 Secondly, the sales of only one kind【五种而非一种】 of domestic cheddar cheeses cannot represent other domestic cheeses. Perhaps the cheddar cheeses are very good and popular with the customer but the other domestic cheeses actually do not sold well. 【整个这段因为对审题的失误显得很乱，是一个店里销售最好的五种奶酪，所以整个secondly所说的都跑题了，应该是国产车打奶酪和进口奶酪的关系】

Moveover, the survey is not convincing enough【不可信就行了，应该不用加enough，个人觉得enough应该在让步的时候用】. The sample of the survey is open to doubts. The magazine subscribers' preference cannot prove all the customers' likeness. Perhaps most of the subscribers are the domestic cheeses business men so that they support the domestic products more. Without a valid survey, the arguer cannot convince me【按照新东方的说法，能不用“我”就尽量不用，显得客观】 to believe his conclusion.【我觉得攻击调查还可以稍微挖一下，比如参与的人数占杂志订阅者的比例和分布在哪些地方之类】

In addition, the arguer fails to consider about the profit difference between domestic cheeses and imported cheeses. It's possible that the profits of larger amount of domestic cheeses can only get the same profits of a little amount of imported cheeses. Therefore, to discontinue stocking the imported cheese may decrease the whole profits. And there is another possibility that the imported cheeses might have their own steady customs group, the loss of these customs may also affect the whole profits and then undermine the conclusion. 【这一段提供了两种不同的可能，但我个人觉得放在最后不是很适合，显得整个逻辑链条不是很顺，我个人的理解应该是先说奶酪和连锁店的问题，之后过度到调查的问题，比较好顺下来，不会觉得太跳跃】

To sum up, this argument is not substantial as it stands. To bolster the conclusion, the arguer should give a more accurate survey to prove the customers prefer the domestic cheeses【这句好像有点别扭】. He also should take into account that all other stores of this chain of cheese stores and the individual profit different between the domestic and imported cheeses.