Argument145 同主题写作

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这篇觉得思路不大好，写得也不是很顺，请大家帮忙看看~~~


TOPIC: ARGUMENT145 - A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore. It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea. The interruption of breathing wakes the person-often so briefly that the waking goes unnoticed-and can leave the person too tired during the day to exercise. Anyone who snores, therefore, should try to eat less than the average person and to exercise more.


The people who snore should eat less and exercise more than average person in order not to gain weight. After careful scrutiny of the argument, I find many flaws in the argument, which make the recommendation not credible.

First of all, the arguer asserts that many people who snore are tend to have sleep apnea at night. However, there is no information about the proportion of the people who have sleep apnea among the snored people. It is entirely possible that only a small part of the people snoring at night will have sleep apnea. Or maybe some of the persons having the condition of sleep apnea do not snore. If it is the case, some people have sleep apnea without snoring may not be easy to gain weight, which sets the sleep apnea unlike to be the reason of fat. If the arguer can not provide enough evidence to prove that there is some relation between sleep apnea and snoring, the conclusion below is of little credibility since it is base on a fault precondition.

Even if there is relationship between sleep apnea and snoring, there is no evidence that it may make people tired and even can not exercise. The arguer does not provide any information about how tired the people are during the day and how many exercise they take. The conclusion has no evidence to support. Furthermore, even if these people are too tired to take exercise at the day time, it does not mean that the condition is the result of sleep apnea or snoring. The arguer ignores the possibility that it is the lack of exercise or feeling tired that make the people snoring at night.

Finally, although there is enough evidence to prove that snoring is really the cause of fat, the recommendation is not credible as well. The arguer does not give any information about how much exercise the people take nowadays and how much food they have everyday. It is neglected that these people may have done that already. If it is not so, as to the people who are snore, they are tired at the day time and even have no ability to exercise. It is different to force them to take exercise, especially when they have to eat less, which will make them more tired. If the condition is really the result of snoring, doing exercise and eating less may not affect because they will still snore at night, even may much more serious.

In conclusion, the arguer failed to support that sleep apnea is really result of snore and will cause tired and lack of exercise. In addition, the effects of the recommendation needs to be proved as well.


[ 本帖最后由 kitty_yy 于 2007-2-15 18:42 编辑 ]