Issue48 同主题写作第七期 求拍！

mayuhorseUID: 198581

TOPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

观点：balance
1，  个人确实对历史的发展起到了十分重要的作用，推动了历史的前进。
2，  同时人民群众对历史的推动作用是显著的。没有大众，但凭个人的力量，很多的事情是不可能完的。
3，  但过分强调个人的作用不能使我们更好的了解历史。历史是个人和大众的统一体，他们在历史中起
    到了不同的作用。
结论：历史研究应该同时关注个人和大众。

As the speaker asserts that the most crucial role in the process of history is not played by the elite, but by the mass people who have been overlooked when studying the history. However, I cannot agree with this assertion simply, as in my mind, both of them propelled the development of history together and it is impossible to identify who are more important than the other.

Admittedly, the most significant events and trends in history have great relationship with the famous few. Ranging from the emperors to the nowadays leaders, from the scientists to the artists, they all have great effects on the development of the history and impel its advance. Newton's three laws of mechanics and laws of gravity, as well as the theory of relativity of Einstein, are the monument in the development of technology and science. Besides, it was Gandhi who carried out the nonviolent disobedience and finally got the independence of India from the Britain. What's more, Medieval artists, Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael, Michelangelo, who are the symbols of the Renaissance are famous not only for their excellent practice but for their profound reflection on the nature of the material worlds. Thus, in this sense, the famous few play a very important role in the history and it is unsurprisingly that their names are passed down and remembered by us.

However, groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten are also significant on the development of the history. Our Chinese ancestors having came up with the idea that “people being the most important” ever since the ancient days, believe that the progress and development of a society hinge on the talents and supports of the majority of the people. Without them, any significant events or trends can never be put out only by the strength of the famous few. Let us take the Great Pyramid, which is one of the Seven Wonders of the World for instance. As materials noted, the Great Pyramid took more than a total of 20000 people to do the work of carrying. Unfortunately, all their names were forgotten while only the owner, King Hhufu was well known. The same as the Chinese anti-aggression wars, without the Chinese people’s unyielding efforts to resist the foreign aggression, it’s hard to gain national liberation only by the leadership of Dr.Sun Yat-sen or Mao Zedong. So we can say that all the famous few are brought about by the trends of their times, and it is the groups of people standing behind the famous few that actually and ultimately push the advancement of the history.

Actually, too much emphasis on the individuals does no well to our understanding of the history. As we know, history is a combination of the individuals and groups both playing their alternative parts on the history: the famous few usually are the leaders and have more deeper insights about the contemporary circumstance than the groups while the groups are usually the support to the leaders. Without the famous few, groups may lose their directions and without the groups, the famous few could only have their plans in their minds. As a consequence, we should put emphasis both on the individuals and the groups.

To sum up, more common people create the history while the famous few stand on the characteristics and features of the history. So neither of them should be ignored in the study of the history.

chongxinlaiUID: 2235209

As the speaker asserts that the most crucial role in the process of history is not played by the elite, but by the mass people who have been overlooked when studying the history. 这里的被动语态听别牛扭的However, I cannot agree with this assertion simply, as in my mind, both of them propelled the development of history together and it is impossible to identify who are 单数吧more important than the other.应该说一样重要，然后归结到我们对历史的研究二者均不可缺，才是对题目的回应亚

Admittedly, the most significant events and trends in history have great relationship with the famous few. Ranging from木见过这种用法好像是范围的意思哈 the emperors to the nowadays leaders, from the scientists to the artists, they all have great effects on the development of the history and impel its advance 意思重复了吧. Newton's three laws of mechanics and laws of gravity, as well as the theory of relativity of Einstein, are the monument in the development of technology and science. Besides, it was Gandhi who carried out the nonviolent disobedience and finally got the independence of India from the Britain. What's more, Medieval artists, Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael, Michelangelo, who are the symbols of the Renaissance are famous not only for their excellent practice but for their profound reflection on the nature of the material worlds. Thus, in this sense, the famous few play a very important role in the history and it is unsurprisingly that their names are passed down and remembered by us.前面的排比学习了，正愁没有例子用呢，谢谢哈~不过这句是怎么推出来的？个人作用大，所以就被留传了？那理所应当群众作用大也该留传亚？

However, groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten never been recognized or been neglected completely就是从来没被记住过是不是好些 are also significant on the development of the history. Our Chinese ancestors 汗，这个用法。。请指教having came up with the idea that “people being the most important” ever since the ancient days, believe that the progress and development of a society hinge on the talents and supports of the majority of the people. Without them, any significant events or trends can never be put out only by the strength of the famous few. Let us take the Great Pyramid, which is one of the Seven Wonders of the World for instance. As materials noted, the Great Pyramid took more than a total of 20000 people to do the work of carrying个人感觉既然要用例子论证群众的力量，那这里就该详细说说，这20000个人都是怎么做的？金字塔凝聚了他们的血汗和智慧等，比如雕刻什么的。。相比而言，上面Great Pyramid后的定语从句可以说是凑字的. Unfortunately, all their names were forgotten while only the owner, King Hhufu was well known. The same as the Chinese anti-aggression wars, without the Chinese people’s unyielding efforts to resist the foreign aggression, it’s hard to gain national liberation only by用过了 the leadership of Dr.Sun Yat-sen or Mao Zedong. So we can say that all the famous few are brought about by the trends of their times,感觉完全否定了上一段亚 and it is the groups of people standing behind the famous few that actually and ultimately push the advancement of the history.

Actually, too much emphasis on the individuals does no well to our understanding of the history.主语从句好些吧，it is harmful。。 As we know, history is a combination of the individuals and groups both playing their alternative parts on the history: the famous few usually are the leaders and have more deeper insights about the contemporary circumstance than the groups while the groups are usually the support to the leaders. Without the famous few, groups may lose their directions and without the groups, the famous few could only have their plans in their minds. As a consequence, we should put emphasis both on the individuals and the groups.这里很像总结的段落亚，因为是纯说理吧，不够充分了

To sum up, more common people create the history while the famous few stand on the characteristics and features of the history. So neither of them should be ignored in the study of the history.文字相当流畅，例子也很多呀，偶要好好学习了。只是看看思路，其实我的提纲要烂得多，有空帮偶拍哈
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=618898

云之翼UID: 2114898

元宵节快乐！

[ 本帖最后由 云之翼 于 2007-3-4 19:22 编辑 ]

muerghqUID: 2272725

As the speaker asserts that the most crucial role in the process of history is not played by the elite, but by the mass people who have been overlooked when studying the history. However, I cannot agree with this assertion simply, as in my mind, both of them propelled the development of history together and it is impossible to identify who are more important than the other.
Admittedly, the most significant events and trends in history have great relationship with the famous few. Ranging from the emperors to the nowadays leaders, from the scientists to the artists, they all have great effects on the development of the history and impel its advance. Newton's three laws of mechanics and laws of gravity, as well as the theory of relativity of Einstein, are the monument in the development of technology and science. Besides, it was Gandhi who carried out the nonviolent disobedience and finally got the independence of India from the Britain. What's more, Medieval artists, Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael, Michelangelo, who are the symbols of the Renaissance are famous not only for their excellent practice but for their profound reflection on the nature of the material worlds. Thus, in this sense, the famous few play a very important role in the history and it is unsurprisingly that their names are passed down and remembered by us.
However, groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten are also significant on the development of the history. Our Chinese ancestors having came up with the idea that “people being the most important” ever since the ancient days, believe that the progress and development of a society hinge on the talents and supports of the majority of the people. Without them, any significant events or trends can never be put out only by the strength of the famous few. Let us take the Great Pyramid, which is one of the Seven Wonders of the World for instance. As materials noted, the Great Pyramid took more than a total of 20000 people to do the work of carrying. Unfortunately, all their names were forgotten while only the owner, King Hhufu was well known. The same as the Chinese anti-aggression wars, without the Chinese people’s unyielding efforts to resist the foreign aggression, it’s hard to gain national liberation only by the leadership of Dr.Sun Yat-sen or Mao Zedong. So we can say that all the famous few are brought about by the trends of their times, and it is the groups of people standing behind the famous few that actually and ultimately push the advancement of the history.
Actually, too much emphasis on the individuals does no well to our understanding of the history. As we know, history is a combination of the individuals and groups both playing their alternative parts on the history: the famous few usually are the leaders and have more deeper insights about the contemporary circumstance than the groups while the groups are usually the support to the leaders. Without the famous few, groups may lose their directions and without the groups, the famous few could only have their plans in their minds. As a consequence, we should put emphasis both on the individuals and the groups.
To sum up, more common people create the history while the famous few stand on the characteristics and features of the history. So neither of them should be ignored in the study of the history.
上面有人很详细的分析过了，我就不做无用功了，而且还没人家分析的好，我就主要说一下结构
第一段提出的论点中只是提到两者都重要，但少了历史应该侧重于哪方面
第二段举的例子很多，而分析很少，没有例子之间的连接过于牵强，有种空白例子的感觉
第三段夹杂着对伟人和大众的重要性，没有突出侧重点
第四段、结尾段还好



[ 本帖最后由 muerghq 于 2007-3-11 00:01 编辑 ]