Argument180 【5f 作文互改小组】求拍扁

fuq_flyUID: 2422554

Argue180

很多其他公司最近指出他们的员工参加了Easy Read的速读课程之后生产效率显著提高。这个课程的一名毕业生能够在两个小时之内读完长达500页的报告，另一名毕业生在一年内从助理经理上升到了副总裁。显然，你的阅读速度越快，在一天之内所能吸收的信息就越多。而且，Easy Read的学费只有每人500元，当考虑到它给Acme带来的效益的时候这就是个小数目。这个费用包括在Spruce City举行的为期三周的研讨会和Easy Read新闻刊物的终生赠阅。显然，Acme通过要求所有员工参加Easy Read的课程将会极大地受益。

The personnel director of Acme Publishing Company recommend that their employees should take the easy read course in order to improve productivity. To support his claim the director cites the facts that many other companies' productivity improves a lot thought having their employees attend the course and outstanding achievements of two graduates. The argument is problematic in several respects.

A threshold problem is the mere fact that many other companies reap much benefit---in terms of improving productivity, by having their employees take the course is scant evidence that the A would gain the same benefit by taking the course. On the one hand, there is no evidence to support the increase of productivity is attribute to the course, perhaps those companies' other policy such as they increase employee's wage, improve their working environment. Or perhaps employees in those companies are more qualified than A's company. All of which is equally possible responsible for the productivity. On the other hand, even if the course help to improve productivity in those companies, this cannot be apply to A due to the difference between A and those companies. It is entirely possible that taking the course is a ineffective way to improve the productivity of A because of the unwillingness of A's employees to take course. Without ruling out these possibilities the director cannot convincing me that A will benefit from requiring their employees to take the EASY read course.

Further more, only the two graduate’s outstanding performance that the director cites cannot to draw a general conclusion about the effectiveness of taking that course. Two graduates is not sufficient and representative of all the people who attend the course. Maybe the two graduates are exception because they have acquired advanced skill before attending this course and have innate talent of leadership that most people do not--in which cases will decrease credibility of the director's claim.

Finally, the director assumes that the benefits of that course will outweigh its cost. Yet, there is no evidence to substantiate this assumption. the time that A's employee spend on the course is which extracted from their working time, therefore resulting in declining the overall productivity. Moreover, the course fee---$500 per employee is considerable high.  All of this will more likely outweigh the course's benefit. Without further cost-benefit analysis, the director cannot draw a hasty conclusion.

In sum, the director fails to adequately support the recommendation. To strengthen the argument, the director must investigate the situation of the other companies and his own company and conduct a large sample of graduates who attended that course in order to evaluate the effectiveness of the course. Finally, the further cost-benefit analysis is needed to estimate the practicality of requiring all of our employees to take that course.

[ 本帖最后由 fuq_fly 于 2007-11-6 16:48 编辑 ]

lestouUID: 2260126

优点:写的很丰实,条理也很清晰,论据基本上都反驳到位了,我基本上是一口气读下来的,如果是在30分钟内搞定的真的就很不简单了,起码我还做不到这种程度.
有几个闪光句型比较喜欢,比如:
A threshold problem is the mere fact that
Without ruling out these possibilities the director cannot convincing me that

缺点:就是perhaps those companies' other policy such as they increase employee's wage, improve their working environment这句好象和前面没接上,可以加几句比如perhaps this's only due to those ........

lestouUID: 2260126

还有就是最后可以提下,即使课程有用,也不必所有人都去, 一些岗位不需要阅读的.

fuq_flyUID: 2422554

thx，收下了