issue118 第三篇, 大家使劲拍~

11yvetteUID: 2102418

------题目------
issue118. "In any field of endeavor------the sciences, the humanities, the social sciences, industry, etc.------it is not the attainment of a goal that matters, but rather the ideas and discoveries that are encountered on the way to the goal."

------提纲------
B1. 在文艺方面,艺术家关注的是创作过程中出现的新思路,新发现
B2. 对于社会科学而言,亦是如此,关注过程多于结果
B3. 但在科学技术方面,结果却是最重要的

------正文------
People are always arguing about that whether the result of endeavor is more vital than the process of that. With the answers' diversity, the polemic is never halting. We would like to assert that attaining to the goal and the proceeding to the goal are both important which depend on the qualities of fields one encounter to cope with.

For humanities, such as arts and literature, the true matter is learning through the way to the goal, and the marrow of which is not simply the final results but the process of the creating. Claude Monet, the greatest impressionist, once intended to depict the cathedral, with renting the attic of a bouquet which just faced to the cathedral. He fixed 7 tripods simultaneously to paint at the different time with different perspectives. What Monet focused on is the discoveries through his observation of the cathedral and waited for the sudden burst of inspiration, and then recorded them immediately. Arts and literature just as the recorder help people to recognize the world around us, the main aim of which is to show the ideas and discoveries through the path to the goal.

Social science as well, put its pivot along the way of endeavor. Due to social science is the kind of science to research the relationship between human beings and the society, it has its own necessity to uncover the troubles during the procedure when they begin a research. The attainment is not the destiny but the ideas acquired on the step to the finale are the basic request. Archeologists never think of the attainment of an archeological activity, instead of which they pursue their outdoor research to explore more evidences of the earliest ancestors and determine the origin of the human being. Although the media report the result of the researches again and again, the researches never ended, in that archeologists always discover much earlier ancestors' fossil of footprints or tools they used. As we discussed above, such as humanities and social science, the fields related to the society focusing more on the way to the results.

However, industry and science concentrated to the attainment of the goal, which attributes to the quality of these fields that, as the research begins, it has already got a definite target to the experiment. As Edison invented bulb, what was his goal? Let people get more lights instead of candles; as Bell invented telephone, what was his goal? Let people communicate distantly instead of face to face; as Watt invented the evaporator, what was his goal? Let machines generate automatically instead of drudges' efforts. Because the directed goal lays front of the researchers, their activities on science are going under these conductions. The ideas and discoveries are the servants to the attainment throughout the researches. For scientists and engineers, they are more often to put their points of view on the results they get at last rather than the proceedings they covers.

In sum, it is the matter for disciplines as science and industry to focus on the attainment to the goal, while for domains as humanities and social science to concentrate to the process as it attributes to the different qualities of the different fields.

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欢迎大家来找茬,记得留链接,我们互相拍啊~~~
^_^

ningxinerUID: 2103394

However, industry and science concentrated to the attainment of the goal, which
                                           ~~~~~~~~~~
是不是应该用concentrated on 呀？

思路很好，很有说服力
倒数第二段的三个排比的例子觉得很有力度，
呵呵，admire
我是新人：）

11yvetteUID: 2102418

是啊,怎么把这个基本搭配给搞错了呢~~~
sigh....

ps:谢谢鼓励啊~~~
    一同努力吧^_^

[ Last edited by 11yvette on 2005-7-3 at 21:36 ]

tangentUID: 209829

issue118 第三篇, 大家使劲拍~

------题目------
issue118. "In any field of endeavor------the sciences, the humanities, the social sciences, industry, etc.------it is not the attainment of a goal that matters, but rather the ideas and discoveries that are encountered on the way to the goal."

------提纲------
B1. 在文艺方面,艺术家关注的是创作过程中出现的新思路,新发现
B2. 对于社会科学而言,亦是如此,关注过程多于结果
B3. 但在科学技术方面,结果却是最重要的

------正文------
People are always arguing about that whether the result of endeavor is more vital 只有三音节词才用more吧，是much vitaller?than the process of that. With the answers' diversity, the polemic 这是形容词吧is never halting. We would like to assert that attaining to the goal and the proceeding to the goal are both important which depend on the qualities of fields one encounter to cope with.

For humanities, such as arts and literature, the true matter is learning through the way to the goal, and the marrow of which is not simply the final results but the process of the creating. Claude Monet, the greatest impressionist, once intended to depict the cathedral, with renting the attic of a bouquet which just faced to the cathedral. He fixed 7 tripods simultaneously to paint at the different time with different perspectives. What Monet focused on is the discoveries through his observation of the cathedral and waited for the sudden burst of inspiration, and then recorded them immediately. Arts and literature just as the recorder help people to recognize the world around us, the main aim of which is to show the ideas and discoveries through the path to the goal.

Social science as well, put its pivot along the way of endeavor. Due to social science is the kind of science to research the relationship between human beings and the society, it has its own necessity to uncover the troubles during the procedure when they begin a research. The attainment is not the destiny but the ideas acquired on the step to the finale are the basic request. Archeologists never think of the attainment of an archeological activity, instead of which they pursue their outdoor research to explore more evidences of the earliest ancestors and determine the origin of the human being. Although the media report the result of the researches again and again, the researches never ended, in that archeologists always discover much earlier ancestors' fossil of footprints or tools they used. As we discussed above, such as humanities and social science, the fields related to the society focusing more on the way to the results.

However, industry and science concentrated to the attainment of the goal, which attributes to the quality of these fields that, as the research begins, it has already got a definite target to the experiment. As Edison invented bulb, what was his goal? Let people get more lights instead of candles; as Bell invented telephone, what was his goal? Let people communicate distantly instead of face to face; as Watt invented the evaporator, what was his goal? Let machines generate automatically instead of drudges' efforts. 排比不错，但是分号之间有两个句子（有一个问号）行不行Because the directed goal lays front of the researchers, their activities on science are going under these conductions. The ideas and discoveries are the servants to the attainment throughout the researches. For scientists and engineers, they are more often to put their points of view on the results they get at last rather than the proceedings they covers.其实在自然科学中也有过程比结果重要的

In sum, it is the matter for disciplines as science and industry to focus on the attainment to the goal, while for domains as humanities and social science to concentrate to the process as it attributes to the different qualities of the different fields.踢玩球好累，改的不够仔细，也是没什么毛病，恭喜你的老毛病没了！

zmmaryUID: 2105117

这边很热闹嘛.我刚从自习教室回来的说.
占一下,明天改吧.

zmmaryUID: 2105117

People are always arguing about that whether the result of endeavor is more vital than the process of that. With the answers' diversity, the polemic is never halting.这个用进行时感觉有点怪啊，就像说never stopping We would like to assert that attaining to the goal and the proceeding to the goal are both important which depend on the qualities of fields one encounter to cope with.这句话表态表得有点模糊呢。或者 the importance…, both important用在这里感觉有点

For humanities, such as arts and literature, the true matter is learning through the way to the goal, and the marrow of which is not simply the final results but the process of the creating. Claude Monet, the greatest impressionist, once intended to depict the cathedral, with renting the attic of a bouquet which just faced to the cathedral. He fixed 7 tripods simultaneously to paint at the different time with different perspectives. What Monet focused on is the discoveries through his observation of the cathedral and waited for the sudden burst of inspiration, and then recorded them immediately. Arts and literature just as the recorder help people to recognize the world around us, the main aim of which is to show the ideas and discoveries through the path to the goal.

Social science as well, put its pivot along the way of endeavor. Due to social science is the kind of science to research the relationship between human beings and the society, it has its own necessity to uncover the troubles during the procedure when they begin a research. The attainment is not the destiny but the ideas acquired on the step to the finale are the basic request. Archeologists never think of the attainment of an archeological activity, instead of which they pursue their outdoor research to explore more evidences of the earliest ancestors and determine the origin of the human being. Although the media report the result of the researches again and again, the researches never ended, in that archeologists always discover much earlier ancestors' fossil of footprints or tools they used. As we discussed above, such as humanities and social science, the fields related to the society focusing more on the way to the results.

However, industry and science concentrated to the attainment of the goal, which attributes to the quality of these fields that, as the research begins, it has already got a definite target to the experiment. As Edison invented bulb, what was his goal? Let people get more lights instead of candles; as Bell invented telephone, what was his goal? Let people communicate distantly instead of face to face; as Watt invented the evaporator, what was his goal? Let machines generate automatically instead of drudges' efforts. 这三个例子比较有力，句子变一变比较好。或者把？去掉，或者把；改成。Because the directed goal lays front of the researchers, their activities on science are going under these conductions. The ideas and discoveries are the servants to the attainment throughout the researches. For scientists and engineers, they are more often to put their points of view on the results they get at last rather than the proceedings they covers.前两段还说得比较好，这个。。。。上面提到了research，这一段实质上只提到了invention没提到真正的research, whose essence is to explore the unknown for the knowledge to better understand ourselves and the world around us. 这一点，认人很不爽。

In sum, it is the matter for disciplines as science and industry to focus on the attainment to the goal, while for domains as humanities and social science to concentrate to the process as it attributes to the different qualities of the different fields.这个结尾好单薄啊。

总得说来，说理你应该还是不错的。例子也很会找。
语言还是有待加强。。。。。。