[经典批改讨论] issue136 我6g aw时写得 [复制链接]

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发表于 2004-7-29 09:25:47 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

刚知道6g成绩，除了作文5.5之外，其他都不好，也不想再多说，安心复习托福了。我感觉issue写得比argument好，估计是个6。所以就找到这篇给大家做个参考。
差不多是按这个思路写的，除了body1写得没这么多，以免喧宾夺主，还有语言也有出入。
The absence of choices is a circumstance that is very, very rare. 【136】
没有选择的情况少之又少。

disagree
1。开头
2.让步：专制国家是的 e.g. Hitler统治下的jewish, black people before emancipation
3过渡：民主国家是有选择的e.g. prectitioner, customers, students, 但是为什么还有人说无选择呢，分析如下
4一种情况是只有最有选择或可行选择 e.g学生期末考试
5一种是没有最满意的选择，但是仍可以有选择，不过不是最优的。e.g.election
6 总结，分为专制国家和民主国家来看。

According to our daily experience, we confront choices every day from the smallest things such as making a choice on what to do after we get up ,what to eat as daily meals to much more important like deciding to invest in which business or companies. Nevertheless/whereas people living in centraliztion countries may encounter many mandatory orders or restrained to laws which make them feel no choices. I contend that as long as the society that we live in is democratic, actually the circumstance of no choices is rare.

First of all, I admit that in a centralized countries like Germany ruled by Hitler, ancient china, North Korea, and racial discrimination countries, populace sometimes lapse into no choice but to be obedient. The rulers or tyrants are pone to make his or her will to act as a standard of the whole society through the means of laws , other regulations. Though the forms of court, military, and legislations seem exist in every democratic countries, those of contralized countries are only at the service of the ruler or tyrants to limit the latitude of common people, sometimes even presumptuously arrest someone and throw into prison. Maybe the most obvious example that could help us understand the hardship of those who living under such circumstance is the Germany during the period ruled by Hitler. At that time Jewish people were massacred, in another word, if they went on stay within the boundary of Germany, their fate is to be killed and be deprived of the first and most important choice--to live. Another good example is the society of America before the emancipation of black people. Have they got choice to not be born as a slave ? No. From the day of they were born, they were sentenced to be subordinate to the white. I just exemplify two instant to indicate that in such countries which has no democracy , peoples choices are few and constrained, so they may now and then face no choices.

However, when it comes to democratic countries like the nowdays America, common people could enjoy their rights entitled by constitutions and laws, among which are the the rights of free religion, speech, exercise, assembly, petition , legislated and ensured by the Amendment 1-10--which makes the absence of choices very rare. People are facing choices everyday and they decide their lives up to themselves: practitioners starts their new business ,chooses a partner; customers have to decide which goods they will buy and which service they'll accept; students can study what they are insterested in. Even though, we still are able to hear someone complaint that they have no choice but to do something. Is that the case that they really have no way out? After further examination one could understand that even who claim they have no chice still have chices .

One case that people feel no other choice but to do something is the fact that they are in front of several options but there is only one that will benefit them most or only one is feasible while others either have disadvantages or infeasible. Consider, a student may say he or she has no choice but to work hard for the approaching exams. Nevertheless, the fact is that to preparing and be diligent is the best way out and will benefit him or her most ,at least heself or herself thinks so; otherwise, say, igoring the advent exam will make him or her feel regretful after the unsatisfying result comes out. In this case, he or she does makes chocies, and there are at least two, to study or give up study, but there may be only a benefical one and feasible one.

Another situation is when there is no best choice , so that people are forced to pick an option from the available ones, but still they have choices. For instance, an electorate could find it hard to make a choice when all the candidates are satisfying, that is there is no such one that could completely represent his or her will. If he insist on his right to vote, the only way out is to vote for a candidate who's plan and action seem better than others. After all, he or she makes a decision among several choices though there is no best choice but a better one. Therefore, after the analysis, it is quite clear that even when people allege they have no chice there do are some choices in a democratic country.

To sum up, it is true that in some extreme cases like centrailized countries, people are sometimes forced to act out the will of the rulesr. However, in a country of democarcy, most often choices are available in front of us . Though when confronting few cases people have a feeling of no chice, the reality is they've already made a decision.

另外我考场上结尾写的比这个要多，我认为高分作文的结尾部分是比较关键的。所以建议不要写得太简略！

祝一切顺利！

[ 本帖最后由 iq28 于 2007-6-23 18:34 编辑 ]

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[经典批改讨论] issue136 我6g aw时写得 [复制链接]

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