issue141 [0710G ＋U Aug小组]第4次作业 ldsun

ldsunUID: 2329026

This issue presents a point of view that personal economic success requires conformity in spite of the benefits of individuality. However, based on my own experience I tend to believe that both individuality and conformity are essential to a person's economic success. Individuality which shows one’s thinking creative can help find opportunities while others cannot; conformity which displays one’s capability guarantee opportunities can be transmuted into success. It is the synergic impacts contributed by the two aspects that lead to one’s personal economic success.

First of all, individuality which is treated more and more important as a character plays indeed a considerable part to personal economic success. Individuality makes one different from others, and helps to seize the advantage that is ignored by most people. There are numerous example especially in these days when computer and internet are ubiquitous. For example, I've heard a senior high school graduates become a millionaire almost overnight. He built a web site called www. millionairehomepage. com in order to pay for his university needs. His web site plays like a different but creative advertisement which makes a great success. It is his individuality that makes his creative idea, thus his success. Under this circumstance, we can find the value of individuality.

Secondly, I think conformity is also dispensable for one's success in economy. Inspection of those successful business figures, it is not hard to pick up the common characters from them. They are all industrious, tenacious, confident and so forth. I want to take that senior high school graduates for example again. It might be tempting to imply that if he is not so hardworking on the study of making a web site before, if he is not so confident about his idea, he would not have succeeded a little. He got the common good qualities which we called conformity and those good qualities help his idea turn to reality.

Moreover, it is not enough to achieve success in possession of either one. Individuality and conformity must be integrated as a whole. Individuality makes different and preeminent, it creates great idea which is like North Star indicating the direction; on the other hand, conformity serves as wind blowing your boat to get forward. Without individuality, one’s industrious cannot be that effective; without conformity, one’s great idea could not be turn to reality that easily.

In sum, I think the point of view that personal economic success requires conformity in spite of the benefits of individuality is partial. To strive for economic success, one should take advantage of individuality and make full use of conformity.

ldsunUID: 2329026

thank you for your patience:-)

ldsunUID: 2329026

为什么没有改呢？

icefirekkUID: 2293126

This issue presents a point of view that personal economicsuccess requires conformity in spite of the benefits of individuality. However,based on my own experience I tend to believe that both individuality andconformity are essential to a person's economic success. Individuality whichshows one’s thinking creative can help find opportunities while others cannot;conformity which displays one’s capability guarantee opportunities can betransmuted into success. It is the synergic impacts contributed by the twoaspects that lead to one’s personal economic success.(题目是"Most people recognize the benefitsof individuality, but the fact is that personal economic success requiresconformity.应该说的是个人的利益很重要，但个人经济成功需要合作。你将此说成是个人经济成功同时需要个人本领与合作，与我以前犯的问题一样，偏大了.benefits是利益的意思)

First of all, individuality which is treated more and more important as acharacter plays indeed a considerable part to personal economic success.Individuality makes one different from others, and helps to seize the advantagethat is ignored by most people. There are numerous example especially in thesedays when computer and internet are ubiquitous.(好词) For example, I've heard a senior high school graduates（用单数）become a millionaire almostovernight. He built a web site called www. millionairehomepage. com in order topay for his university needs. His web site plays like a different(何解释？) but creative advertisementwhich makes a great success. It is his individuality that makes his creativeidea, thus his success. Under this circumstance, we can find the value ofindividuality.
(单说这段不错。但根据题目应该是说个人经济成功需要合作，如何在合作中处理好个人利益与集体的关系,或者说怎样才能在合作的基础上用个人能力来追求更大的利益（利益范围很广，可以是声望、认可、地位等）。以下同)
Secondly, I think conformity is also dispensable for one's success in economy.Inspection of those successful business figures, it is not hard to pick up thecommon characters from them. They are all industrious, tenacious, confident andso forth. I want to take that senior high school graduates for example again.It might be tempting to imply that if he is not so hardworking on the study of（when）making a web sitebefore, if he is not so confident about his idea, he would not have succeeded alittle. He got the common good qualities which we called conformity and thosegood qualities help his idea turn to reality.
(conformity是合作的意思，在本题目中。当然也有服从的含义，也可以说是在合作中有服从的必要。总的思路第一段末我说了，不再重复)
Moreover, it is not enough to achieve success in possession of either one.Individuality and conformity must be integrated as a whole. Individuality makesdifferent and preeminent, it creates great idea which is like North Starindicating the direction; on the other hand, conformity serves as wind blowingyour boat to get forward.（比喻用的很好啊，说明两者缺一不可） Without individuality, one’s industrious cannot be that effective;without conformity, one’s great idea could not be turn to reality that easily.

In sum, I think the point of view that personal economic success requiresconformity in spite of the benefits of individuality is partial. To strive foreconomic success, one should take advantage of individuality and make full useof conformity.（此段正题，点出主题，没任何偏差）
（根据斑竹给我批改的，以后我不再仔细挑选你在单词拼写等简单错误。只关心写作思路、论证方式等。OK？）