Issue177 抽题模拟之作，还有5天考试

fhxyweiUID: 157384

Issue177: 507 words  45 minutes
The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes.

The knowledge, accumulated by human beings during thousands of years, has tell us a more true world that consists of nature, society and ourselves than we perceive through our eyes. The main approach to penetrate the nature and society around us, besides our daily experience, is the study of academic disciplines.

In the first place, most of our direct daily experience about our natural world is unreliable, which eventually get an explanation from our academic study. Rules and principles of our world always hide behind the phenomenon that always give us a delusion. In the physical world, since we were children, we have seen that the sun rises from the east. Without the academic study, most of us would have concluded that the sun revolves around the earth just like our ancestors did. The main quality of the water, before the academic study in school, is so superficial that we only know its color, temperature and its function for drinking. However, after learning its physical and chemical qualities in the textbooks, we have a brand new idea about this ordinary substance in the natural world. It is the systematic knowledge in academic disciplines that has taught us what the real nature is behind its phenomenon that we perceive in our eyes.

In the second place, it is also the study of academic disciplines that helps us to understand the society we live. How does the society work? What does it consist of? All these questions cannot get definite answers before we learn those academic disciplines such as economy, history and politic. For example, through studying history, I know this world is not as peaceful as I imagined when I was child since history tells me that two tremendous disasters of war occurred just in last century. Through learning economy, I have a better understanding of market-oriented economy that means all the trade activities are mainly guided by market. After studying politic, I realize that there are two distinct social systems in this world: the democratic one comprised of several parties, the autocratic one manipulated by one party. All these academic studies have altered my established concepts that are formed in my daily experience or are indoctrinated by my parents in my early life.

Finally, we human beings deepen the cognition about ourselves including both our physical and mental conditions in the help of studying the academic disciplines. The discipline of arts helps people to explore their deep emotion, which can guide them to appreciate this world in an aesthetic way. The study of psychology leads people to have a deep understanding of how our mind functions. Through academic study, mankind begins to know more and more about itself, gradually realizing the difference between human and animals.


In my final analysis, the concept and the cognition about our world are eventually corrected and established through the academic education. It is the advantage of human wisdom that can be handed down from generation to generation that has helped us have a fast and precise understanding to the world around us.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-22 at 12:20 ]

fhxyweiUID: 157384

自己看了一遍，politic应当修改为politics

liulin12369UID: 2112878

这时候该写机井了的说，看前人的经验啊。
而且还抽到教育类，最容易的一种~~汗~~

fhxyweiUID: 157384

只有偶尔抽题，才能检验自己的真实水平，如果能碰到自己写过的机井， 那时万幸，碰不到呢？ 还不是硬这头皮写：）

mickyeUID: 198329

这个也是jj高频哦

bridgewalkerUID: 208595

Originally posted by fhxywei at 2005-7-22 17:30
只有偶尔抽题，才能检验自己的真实水平，如果能碰到自己写过的机井， 那时万幸，碰不到呢？ 还不是硬这头皮写：）

楼主写了多少篇了？

edgarluUID: 203648

Issue177 抽题模拟之作，还有5天考试

Issue177: 507 words  45 minutes
The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes.

The knowledge, accumulated by human beings during thousands of years, has tell us a more true world that consists of nature, society and ourselves than [what] we perceive through our eyes. The main approach to penetrate the nature and society around us, besides our daily experience, is the study of academic disciplines.

In the first place, most of our direct daily experience about our natural world is unreliable, which eventually get an explanation from our academic study. Rules and principles of our world always hide behind the phenomenon that always give us a delusion. In the physical world, since [the time when] we were children, we have seen that the sun rises from the east. Without the academic study, most of us would have concluded that the sun revolves around the earth just like our ancestors did [呵呵，这话本身是没什么问题了，意思和语法都不错，不过还是建议把just like our ancesters did放到that后面做插入语，免有歧义]. The main quality of the water, before the academic study in school, is so superficial that we only know its color, temperature and its function for drinking. However, after learning its physical and chemical qualities in the textbooks, we have a brand new idea about this ordinary substance in the natural world. It is the systematic knowledge in academic disciplines that has taught us what the real nature is behind its phenomenon that we perceive in our eyes.

In the second place, it is also the study of academic disciplines that helps us to understand the society we live [in]. How does the society work? What does it consist of? All these questions cannot get definite answers before we learn those academic disciplines such as economy, history and politic. For example, through studying history, I know this world is not as peaceful as I imagined when I was child since history tells me that two tremendous disasters of war occurred just in last century. Through learning economy, I have a better understanding of market-oriented economy that means all the trade activities are mainly guided by market. After studying politic, I realize that there are two distinct social systems in this world: the democratic one comprised of several parties, the autocratic one manipulated by one party. All these academic studies have altered my established concepts that are formed in my daily experience or are indoctrinated[查了一下这个词的用法好像只能是indoctrinate sb. With sth. ] by my parents in my early life.

Finally, we human beings deepen the cognition about ourselves including both our physical and mental conditions in the help of studying the academic disciplines. The discipline of arts helps people to explore their deep emotion, which can guide them to appreciate this world in an aesthetic way. The study of psychology leads people to have a deep understanding of how our mind functions. Through academic study, mankind begins to know more and more about itself, gradually realizing the difference between human and animals. [Neat! 赞一个，简洁明了但是干净利索。但是关于art的论述，一来学习艺术好像不是explore our emotion吧，二来art & psychology的组合和论点里的physical and mental不十分符合]


In my final analysis, the concept and the cognition about our world are eventually corrected and established through the academic education. It is the advantage of human wisdom that can be handed down from generation to generation that has helped us have a fast and precise understanding to the world around us. [两个that一时让人不知道it is强调的是哪个that，把前面的 that can be删了怎么样？]
这样的文章如果是限时完成，楼主考试无虞了
楼主考前的习作将长期关注，我比楼主晚5天考，祝楼主高奏凯歌

fhxyweiUID: 157384

谢谢edgarlu

第3个body不是neat，是没有时间认真展开，搞了一个art和phychology就匆匆结束，来写结尾，呵呵

ahqiuUID: 207682

Originally posted by liulin12369 at 2005-7-22 16:43
这时候该写机井了的说，看前人的经验啊。
而且还抽到教育类，最容易的一种~~汗~~

我不同意教育类的简单哈，教育类的观点最容易重复了，而且不容易深入分析，最好敬而远之，呵呵

ahqiuUID: 207682

Issue177: 507 words  45 minutes
The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes.

The knowledge, accumulated by human beings during thousands of years, has tell us a more true world that consists of nature, society and ourselves than we perceive through our eyes. The main approach to penetrate the nature and society around us, besides our daily experience, is the study of academic disciplines.（看来你是举双手赞成了，往下看）
In the first place, most of our direct daily experience about our natural world is unreliable, which eventually get an explanation from our academic study. Rules and principles of our world always hide behind the phenomenon that always give us a delusion. In the physical world, since we were children, we have seen that the sun rises from the east. Without the academic study, most of us would have concluded that the sun revolves around the earth just like our ancestors did. The main quality of the water, before the academic study in school, is so superficial that we only know its color, temperature and its function for drinking. However, after learning its physical and chemical qualities in the textbooks, we have a brand new idea about this ordinary substance in the natural world. It is the systematic knowledge in academic disciplines that has taught us what the real nature is behind its phenomenon that we perceive in our eyes.（水的例子并没有支持你观点中的unreliable, 只是说你理解得更加深入了，你觉得呢？）

In the second place, it is also the study of academic disciplines that helps us to understand the society we live. How does the society work? What does it consist of? （这样的问题有点自找麻烦的感觉，回答这两个问题并不容易阿，建议要么好好想个答案，要么换个说法）All these questions cannot get definite answers before we learn those academic disciplines such as economy, history and politic. For example, through studying history, I know this world is not as peaceful as I imagined when I was child since history tells me that two tremendous disasters of war occurred just in last century.（这个不太好，历史仅仅教会了你这个吗？） Through learning economy, I have a better understanding of market-oriented economy that means all the trade activities are mainly guided by market. After studying politic, I realize that there are two distinct social systems in this world: the democratic one comprised of several parties, the autocratic one manipulated by one party. All these academic studies have altered my established concepts that are formed in my daily experience（以后的可以去掉了，好像对中心没什么用） or are indoctrinated by my parents in my early life.

Finally, we human beings deepen the cognition about ourselves including both our physical and mental conditions in the help of studying the academic disciplines. The discipline of arts helps people to explore their deep emotion, which can guide them to appreciate this world in an aesthetic way. The study of psychology leads people to have a deep understanding of how our mind functions. Through academic study, mankind begins to know more and more about itself, gradually realizing the difference between human and animals.（最后这句话有点扯，呵呵，论证不够充分，大概是时间的缘故）
（art算不算academic discipline?, 我不是很清楚，呵呵）

In my final analysis, the concept and the cognition about our world are eventually corrected and established through the academic education. It is the advantage of human wisdom that can be handed down from generation to generation that has helped us have a fast and precise understanding to the world around us
这篇作文看得我直冒冷汗，呵呵，不是你写的不好，而是我把study理解成了研究，自然就不会把它扯到和教育一起去了，问你一下，理解成研究就算是完全偏题了吧？
提点意见吧，这篇文章是你的文章里面比较乱的一篇了，不是打击你哈，主要的三部分是很清晰的，立意也好，但写得时候每一部分的论证都不够简洁有力，我觉得，再修改一下吧，有时间的话。
不过我觉得考试时写成这样也就不错了，别太紧张了哈
因为上网的时间被我用的查不多了这个月，所以没经常来看看，呵呵

fhxyweiUID: 157384

study可以理解成研究啊，反正就是学习专业知识的意思，我就这么理解的


谢谢修改，我基本上大势已定，这两天看一下以前写的作文，后天上考场！考完后，回头帮你改！