7月底AWQQ78682794小组第二次作业by Gypsophila

追梦小木耳UID: 2781857

小组第二次作业
本人第一篇issue
欢迎各位同学猛拍


48"The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

在历史进程中，名人、伟人的作用和群体的作用哪一个更重要。
1 定义重大历史事件：推动社会变革、发展、进步的事件、过程，对当时和将来产生重大影响。
2 群体有很重要的作用，但是个人有代表性，如现代主义建筑的兴起，某某大师提出的主张、做出的作品，产生了巨大的影响
3 个人起决定作用。如工业革命，很多农民进城当工人，为工业化做出贡献，但这都得益于机器的发明创造。
4结论：群体的力量不容忽视，但强调名人、伟人的功绩、贡献也没有错。


When studying a significant event in history, some famous individuals always stand out, while the groups of people are ignored, which in some one’s opinion, is unreasonable. Admittedly, the groups people had made great contributions, their functions are not as irreplaceable as that of famous few, who therefore deserve more attention.

There is no doubt that groups of people had played important roles in significant trends such as movements in art, yet the appearance of some talented masters had greatly influenced those movements, making them the representatives of the trends. We may take a single example of Le Corbusier, one of the most famous architects in modern architecture. Before him, a number of architects had been trying to bring modernism
in art to the field of architecture. However, it was him who came up with the five points of new architecture and applied them to his works. His proposition had tremendous effects on the modern architecture and determined what the buildings we live in are. Although, there were lots of excellent architects having made better works, which developed modern architecture, their concepts and design methods were based on the accomplishment of Le Corbusier. Thus, the study of history of architecture should lay focus on him in order to better understand the development of modern architecture. Another typical instance is the contribution the scientists made in Industrial Revolution. In 19th century, an increasing number of people came to town, supplying sufficient labors to the factories. Nevertheless, without the improvement of the steamer by James Watt and the inventions of other mechines, the industrilizition was impossible to happen. In this case, it were the scientists rather than the workers who deserve more emphysis.

The famous individuals are always playing the role of leader and decision-makers in historical events. They have been shouldering huge responsibilities while other people just give suggestions and follow the lead. History is filled with such examples as wars. Although, the victory sometimes was attributed to the bravery of the soldiers, the essential factor lied in the correct decisions and proper strategies made by the leader. Therefore, they were more worth memorizing. On the other, if they failed, it was the leader whom to blame. How one leader performed in the war could determine the result, and this is the reason for the study of the famous directors.

To conclude, the important functions of groups of people in the great events and trends are beyond the doubt. However, in comparison, famous individual’s contribution affects the social development much deeply. And studying their lives and works can help us understand the events and trends in history better.

追梦小木耳UID: 2781857

159) 79. The nation of Claria covers a vast physical area. But despite wide geographic differences, many citizens are experiencing rising costs of electricity. A recent study of household electric costs in Claria found that families who cooled their houses with fans alone spent more on electricity than did families using air conditioners alone for cooling. However, those households that reported using both fans and air conditioners spent less on electricity than those households that used either fans or air conditioners alone. Thus, the citizens of Claria should follow the study's recommendation and use both air conditioners and fans in order to save money on electricity.


The conclusion that using of both air conditioners and fans should be recommended in order to save money on electricity appears reasonable at first glance. However, it is questionable to make the recommendation only by comparing the electric costs, which may mask other factors that should be taken into consideration.

While the argument is comparing the electric cost of each cooling device, cooling effect is ignored. Which cooling method is more effective? Perhaps, the using of fan costs most but is the most effective way which would not take long to lower the temperature. Even it was turn off, the room can stay cool for a while.  Although the using of both saves money, it still can not make the room cool. Therefore, the residents have to keep both fans and air conditioners running, which could cost even more money on electricity.

Even if the cooling effects are equal, the argument fails to consider other possible costs. What about the prices of the cooling devices? Maybe, an air conditioner is far more expensive than a fan, let alone the purchase of both.  It is possible that one family could tolerate the higher electric cost produced by the using of fans , but can not afford an air conditioner. In addition, air conditioners may need maintaining every year, which brings about a number of fees while fans are only in need of  occasional cleaning.

In evaluating the evidence of the study, one must consider how the study was conducted. Is it conducted during the same weather conditions? If not, the result could be rather unreliable, since the electric power of the air conditioners or fans varies with the temperature settled. Meanwhile, it is not mentioned that whether each family use cooling devices during the same time of the day or whether they are using for equally long time. It is possible that some families only use cooling devices in the evenings when all the family members are at home. Others may keep the devices running all day long since they do not have to work or work at home. Thus, the result that using both fans and air conditioners save money on electricity remains questionable, that may not apply to most families.

To conclude, the argument, which seems logical, has several flaws as discussed above. It would be improved by evaluating all possible costs caused by cooling devices after a more considerate and precise study.

colin8741UID: 2835824

字号太大了……看的好累……

追梦小木耳UID: 2781857

3# colin8741
抱歉，改小了
提提意见吧~

clarence8UID: 2813388

When studying a significant event in history, some famous individuals always stand out, while the groups of people are ignored, which in some one’s opinion, is unreasonable.(这一句要么把最后个“，”去掉，要么在which后再加一个“，”鉴于此句“，”够多还是去掉较好) Admittedly, the groups people（这个搭配有些别扭，题目里不是groups of people，还是带着of吧） had （have，与后面的时态一致）made great contributions, their functions are not as irreplaceable as that of famous few, who therefore deserve more attention.

There is no doubt that groups of people had played important roles in significant trends such as movements in art, yet the appearance of some talented masters had greatly influenced those movements, making them the representatives of the trends.(这句话用现在完成时就可以了吧) We may take a single example of Le Corbusier, one of the most famous architects in modern architecture. Before him, a number of architects had been trying to bring modernism in art to the field of architecture. However, it was him who came up with the five points of new architecture and applied them to his works. His proposition had tremendous effects on the modern architecture and determined what the buildings we live in are. Although, there were lots of excellent architects having made better works, which developed modern architecture, their concepts and design methods were based on the accomplishment of Le Corbusier. Thus, the study of history of architecture（两个of在一起，建议改为architectural history） should lay focus on him in order to better understand the development of modern architecture. Another typical instance is the contribution the scientists made in Industrial Revolution. In 19th century, an increasing number of people came to town, supplying sufficient labors to the factories. Nevertheless, without the improvement of the steamer by James Watt and the inventions of other mechanics, the industrialization was impossible to happen. In this case, it were(was) the scientists rather than the workers who deserve more emphasis. (我也刚刚开始写issue，看到你的论据写的很有深度，学习啦)

The famous individuals are always playing the role of leader（leaders） and decision-makers in historical events. They have been shouldering huge responsibilities while other people just give suggestions and follow the lead. History is filled with such examples as wars. Although, the victory sometimes was attributed to the bravery of the soldiers, the essential factor lied in the correct decisions and proper strategies made by the leader. Therefore, they were more worth memorizing. On the other, if they failed, it was the leader whom to blame（to be blamed）. How one leader performed in the war could determine the result, and this is the reason for the study of the famous directors.（这句话是学习指挥的重要性吧，不知道director有没有这层意思，另外这段leader出现次数比较多，可以尝试替换，譬如commander，general等）

To conclude, the important functions of groups of people in the great events and trends are beyond the doubt. However, in comparison, famous individual’s contribution affects the social development much deeply. And studying their lives and works can help us understand the events and trends in history better.
总结：除了些许小错误外，语言流畅，思路清晰，最值得我学习的是论据的使用。另外我有一点疑惑：中间两段感觉是在论证一个问题，层次感不太明显。当然，我刚刚起步，有不当的地方还请见谅

colin8741UID: 2835824

Gypsophila的ARGU，只改了小部分语法问题，括号里是我写的
The conclusion that using of(/) both air conditioners and fans should be recommended in order to save money on electricity appears reasonable at first glance. However, it is questionable to make the recommendation only by comparing the electric(electrical?) costs, which may mask other factors that should be taken into consideration.

While the argument is comparing the electric cost of each cooling device, cooling effect is ignored. Which cooling method is more effective? Perhaps, the using of fan costs most but is the most effective way which would not take long to lower the temperature. Even it was turn(is turned) off, the room can stay cool for a while.  Although the using of both saves money, it still can not make the room cool Therefore, the residents have to keep both fans and air conditioners running, which could cost even more money on electricity. (关于效率的部分，总觉得有问题，说不出来，这个好像是前提吧……)

Even if the cooling effects are equal, the argument fails to consider other possible costs. What about the prices of the cooling devices? Maybe, an air conditioner is far more expensive than a fan, let alone the purchase of both.  It is possible that one family could tolerate the higher electric cost produced by the using of fans , but can not afford an air conditioner. In addition, air conditioners may need maintaining every year, which brings about a number of fees while fans are only in need of  occasional cleaning.

In evaluating the evidence of the study, one must consider how the study was conducted. Is it conducted during the same weather conditions? If not, the result could be rather unreliable, since the electric power of the air conditioners or fans varies with the temperature settled. Meanwhile, it is not mentioned that whether each family use cooling devices during the same time of the day or whether they are using for equally long time. It is possible that some families only use cooling devices in the evenings when all the family members are at home. Others may keep the devices running all day long since they do not have to work or work at home. Thus, the result that using both fans and air conditioners （can） save money on electricity remains questionable, that(which) may not apply to most families.

To conclude, the argument, which seems logical, has several flaws as discussed above. It would be improved by evaluating all possible costs caused by cooling devices after a more considerate and precise study.

我觉得可以补充的论点有：
1）地域差异导致的某些地区可能并不需要制冷或一年中只有极少数时间需要
2）用来制冷的电费占总用电量的比例，在制冷费用上节省的必要性？

(我罪恶的成为了只说不做的人:L）

追梦小木耳UID: 2781857

6# colin8741
你说的都很对
我在写这文的时候，的确少考虑了很多因素
一起加油~