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[未归类] TOEFL暑期集结号作文第六次作业By hustzwj [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-7-28 12:04:58 |显示全部楼层

Do you agree with the following statement: nowadays people spend too much time on personal enjoyment -things they like to do-rather than the things they should do.


1.



1. Admittedly, 一些人确实在荒废时间于personal enjoyment,一些学生不学习,去打PC游戏,一些工人上班时间chat,或者surfing on the internet,而不工作


2. However, 大部分人还是很尽职的,因为他们很忙,而没有时间去花在enjoyment上。尽管越来越多的娱乐设施,但是人们都忙于工作,


3. 而且,人们越来越有责任心,他们愿意去尽到自己的commitment,去做好自己的工作,同时也去帮助别人。




As the high technology has brought great benefit and convenience for people's daily life nowadays, more and more entertainment facilities and places of recreations are supplied for people to enjoy. Thus, some of the citizens would be likely to spend more time on personal enjoyment rather than their own commitment for jobs. However, they are just a very few part and partial people among us, and I think people in the contemporary world are so busy with their businesses and more responsible for their jobs so that they have take more time working but not enjoying.



Admittedly, some people are playing more time than working, especially some of the students. In the high school or even the university, some students, in order to escape from the heavy burden of study, would be indulged in the playing computer games or surfing on the Internet. In the games or virtual community, they can have much more fun and pleasure by chatting, fighting, and so on. Besides, some workers use the work-time to chat or shop on the Internet when they are in the company office. I definitely cannot tolerate these people's behavior and I will dismiss these workers if I was the boss.



However, such kind of people who always put joy before everything cannot represent all of the citizens. It is well known that people are leading more hurried and more complicated life in the fast speed world, so we should commit more responsibility to the jobs what we should do rather what we like to do. Comparing to our parents generations, we are busier and have heavier loads for living. For example, I have to spend more than 8 hours each day to finish my tasks, and after working, I need to take less than 1 hours driving to go back home. The moment I enter my house, I feel so tired and just want to sleep in the bed. In that situation, I think we may not drag our tiresome body to go to the recreation places to sing Karaoke or else. Accordingly, people are so busy that they will not have extra time to spend on enjoyment.



Furthermore, as far as I see, increasing numbers of people have received higher education, and the citizens are becoming more and more responsible for their jobs and willing to help other people in need. For one thing, in the company, with great team-work spirit and highly emotion on the jobs, the workers there all spare no efforts to finish their tasks well in order to make an excellent enterprise in the marketing. In the school, aware of the importance of study, students devote themselves to the learning new knowledge carefully. Moreover, in the earthquake happening in China last year, there are many volunteers go to Sichuan to contribute to the reconstruction of schools and housing for the kids and homeless people. Maybe they do not need to go to these poor condition places to join in the works, but they are willing to give a hand for these people just because they feel that they should undertake the commitment for it.




In conclusion, not only do people nowadays have too much work to do, but also they are more responsible to take the charge of their jobs and volunteer to help other people. Therefore, it makes no sense that people are spending more time on personal enjoyment rather than the works they should do.

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发表于 2009-7-28 13:53:54 |显示全部楼层
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发表于 2009-8-1 21:44:44 |显示全部楼层
2# 小籁
clap,,谢谢支持噢,,就要考了,8.8多吉利,bless吧

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发表于 2009-8-2 15:59:18 |显示全部楼层
As the high technology has brought great benefit and convenience for people's daily life nowadays, more and more entertainment facilities and places of recreations are supplied for (to) people to enjoy. Thus, some of the citizens would be likely to spend more time on personal enjoyment rather than their own commitment for jobs. However, they are just a very few part and partial people among us (这两句和在一起好像很难读懂, 分成两句吧there is just a small portion of such people and they are the partial ones among us), and I think people in the contemporary world are so busy with their businesses and more responsible for their jobs (so这个so可以删掉的,前面有so了) that they have take more time working but not enjoying.

Admittedly, some people are playing more time than working, especially some of the students. In the high school or even the university, some students, in order to escape from the heavy burden of study, would be indulged in (the可以去掉) playing computer games or surfing the Internet. In the games or virtual community, they can have much more fun and pleasure by chatting, fighting, and so on. Besides, some workers use the work-time to chat or shop on the Internet when they are in the company office. I definitely cannot tolerate these people's behavior and I will dismiss these workers if I was the boss.

However, such kind of people who always put joy before everything cannot represent all of the citizens. It is well known that people are leading more hurried and more complicated life in the fast speed world, so we should commit more responsibility to the jobs what (which?) we should do rather (than) what we like to do. Comparing to our parents generations, we are busier and have heavier loads for living. For example, I have to spend more than 8 hours each day to finish my tasks, and after working, I need to take less than 1 hours driving to go back home. The moment I enter my house, I feel so tired and just want to sleep in the bed. In that situation, I think we may not drag our tiresome body to go to the recreation places to sing Karaoke or else. Accordingly, people are so busy that they will not have extra time to spend on enjoyment.

Furthermore, as far as I see, increasing numbers of people have received higher education, and the citizens are becoming more and more responsible for their jobs and willing to help other people in need. For one thing, in the company, with great team-work spirit and highly emotion on the jobs, the workers there all spare no efforts to finish their tasks well in order to make an excellent enterprise in the marketing. In the school, (being) aware of the importance of study, students devote themselves to (the可以去掉) learning new knowledge carefully. Moreover, in the earthquake happening (happened to) in China last year, there are many volunteers go (going) to Sichuan to contribute to the reconstruction of schools and housing for the kids and homeless people. Maybe they do not need to go to these poor condition places to join in the works, but they are willing to give a hand for these people just because they feel that they should undertake the commitment for it.

In conclusion, not only do people nowadays have too much work to do, but also they are more responsible to take the charge of their jobs and volunteer to help other people. Therefore, it makes no sense that people are spending more time on personal enjoyment rather than the works they should do.

写的真好.
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hustzwj + 1 谢谢你对我的小细节給了这么多指点,你看东 ...

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发表于 2009-8-7 17:13:27 |显示全部楼层
lz明天考试了,我就不详细给你改作文了(本来写的也挺好的)
加油吧!!祝你明天考试听,说,读,写样样顺利,期待你凯旋而归~
bless!!!
fighting for future

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RE: TOEFL暑期集结号作文第六次作业By hustzwj [修改]

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