Krose的作文贴

kroseUID: 3046161

Do you agreeor disagree with the following statement? For a person to succeed in life, knowledge gained through study is more important than the ability to be creative.

Obviously, it is knowledge that plays such a significant role on one's way to success during these years. Nowadays, more and more people go to university or college to absorb assorted knowledge through study. However, some people say that ability of creativity is also an important factor to one's success. As for me, I am incline to the view that assimilating knowledge through study is more important.

First and foremost, almost everybody who want to be success should study to gain knowledge through different ways. It is the knowledge that enhances people's ability of comprehension and communication as well as extend their horizon which are vital for a person’s way to success. Bacon has been said, "knowledge is power." This sufficiently proves that knowledge is not only important to one's development of psychology but also play a crucial role on people's life. For instance, my mother has been managed a factory in Guangzhou 5 years ago. At the begginning of that time, she didn't know how to administered labor in the factory. Thus, her lack of experience has caused a chaos among the labor. During that time, she was so anxious that cannot slept at night and then she completely understood the importance of knowledge, so she went to a management school next day to study how to administer. When she came back to the factory, she lead her factory to prosperity and make herself more and more sophisticated.

Moreover, it is the knowledge that propels the development of people. Without knowledge, Edison cannot invented electric light so that we will live in dark, Newton cannot discoveried the law of gravity and there's no Microsoft in the world. Edison and Newton are successful because of theirs knowledgeable, and only if people study to gain knowledge so that they can complement themselves, thus they become successful and change world through the knowledge they have learn. That’s why we can sitting in luminous room, using advanced computer to work and enjoy a cup of hot coffee even in cold winter day.

Of course, the ability to be creative is also a practical skill that helps people to explore the new world of their mind. With the development of people's ability of creativity, they can resolve some emergency very quickly even thought they encounter this kind of problem in first time. More important, for one question, these people with adequate ability to be creative, can elcite definitely different explaination from diverse angle which can usually generate new miracle.

In conclusion, study to gain knowledge filled people's whole career. Somebody even never stop studying in his life just because he like studying, and these kind of people can readily reach the destination of success. Anyway, we cannot ignore the status of knowledge, and same as the ability to be creative. But if I have to choose, I thought knowledge gained through study is more important.

自己修改了下拿上来的，还是有点语法的问题。唉

希望各位别手下留情，谢谢

mpromanusUID: 2565872

1# krose

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For a person to succeed in life, knowledge gained through study is more important than the ability to be creative.

Obviously, it is knowledge that plays such a significant role on one's way to success during these years. Nowadays, more and more people go to university or college to absorb assorted knowledge (‘Assorted’ doesn’t really go with ‘knowledge’ as normally only separate, countable items can be ‘assorted’. ‘Knowledge’ is usually ‘varied’.) through studies. However, some people say that ability of creativity is also an important factor to one's success. As for me, I am inclined to the view that assimilating knowledge through studies is more important.

First and foremost, almost everybody who wants to be successful should study to gain knowledge through different ways. It is the knowledge that enhances people's abilities of comprehension and communication, as well as extends their horizons, which are vital for a person’s way to success. Bacon has been said, "Knowledge is power." This sufficiently proves that knowledge is not only important to one's development of psychology, but also plays a crucial role on people's lives. For instance, my mother has been managing a factory in Guangzhou for 5 years ago (完成时只能用时间段，不能用时间点..). At the begginning of that time, she didn't know how to administered labor in the factory. Thus, her lack of experience has caused a chaos among the laborers. During that time, she was so anxious that she cannot sleep at night. and Then she completely understood the importance of knowledge, so she went to a management school the next day to study how to administer business administration. When she went back to the factory, she lead her factory to prosperity and made herself more and more sophisticated. (This does prove that knowledge contributed to her success, but this doesn’t mean knowledge was her only way to be successful. She could have been creative and solved the problem all the same, we just never know because you never said that would not have been the case – note, this is a very important concept in logic: if you don’t mention anything, either direct or induced, you can’t make logical conclusions about it. It doesn’t matter if other relevant things you say are true. So, in this paragraph, you only proved that knowledge was important to your mother’s success, but you didn’t prove that knowledge was MORE important to her success than creativity.)

Moreover, it is the knowledge that propels the development of people. Without knowledge, Edison cannot have invented the electric light bulb, so that we will live in the dark (So you think Edison is the only person in the entire history of human beings who will invent the bulb..nobody else..), Newton cannot have discoveried the law of gravity, and there's will be no Microsoft in the world (Without that comma, you’re saying that Newton’s discovery of the law of gravity is the reason Microsoft exists in the world..But even then, Microsoft would not be a good example for ‘knowledge gained through studies’..because Bill Gates happens to be a university dropout rather than a doctorate..). Edison and Newton are successful because of theirs knowledgeable (or ‘they are knowledgeable’, but not 2 expressions mixed together..), and only if people study to gain knowledge so that they can complement themselves? (夸奖自己？), thus they become successful and change the world through the knowledge they have learnt. That’s why we can sitting in luminous rooms, use advanced computers to work and enjoy a cup of hot coffee even in a cold winter day.
Of course, the ability to be creative is also a practical skill that helps people to explore the new world of their minds. With the development of people's ability of creativity, they can resolve some emergencies very quickly even thought they encounter them for the first time. More importantly, for one question, these people with adequate ability to be creative, can elcite definitely different explaination from diverse angle which can usually generate new miracle.(This is a direct translation that makes little sense in terms of English. Do not try too hard with your language. Focus on what exactly you want to express – ‘Creative people can provide diverse perspectives on one old problem and possibly inspire new solutions’ - rather than trying to ‘use’ your language too much. I didn’t use any big words like ‘elicit’. And my sentence structure in this example is not complex at all – it’s a simple ‘and’, with straight forward subject-verb-object ordering in both parts. No ‘which’ clause. But it says what I want to say and says it clearly. That’s good enough, perhaps better than a jumbo of words and clauses, per TOEFL standards.)

In conclusion, study to gain knowledge fills people's whole careers. Somebody even never stops studying in his life just because he likes studying, and this kind of people can readily reach the destination of success. Anyway, we cannot ignore the status of knowledge, and same as the ability to be creative (What is the thing that is ‘same as the ability to be creative’? Your sentence reads fully as ‘we cannot ignore the status of knowledge, and we cannot same as the ability to be creative’.). But if I have to choose, I think knowledge gained through study is more important.

总结：

你的论述基本没有很大的问题，语法问题比较大，主要有如下几个：

1.
单复数和第三人称单数，尤其在复句里，几乎从来不记得保持主谓一致，过了一个and就丢了第三人称单数的那种错误。。

2.
努力用连词，很好，所以论述相对还比较清楚，但是有滥用连词倾向，加上句法掌握并不扎实，所以长句经常没有整体结构。比如..and only if people study to gain knowledge so that they can complement themselves, thus they become successful and change world through the knowledge they have learn，明显是想到什么就用什么，完全不顾整句话整体的表达应该是什么结构。。

3.
对时态的掌握，同样请注意前后一致，避免过去时现在时掺杂着用，除非有必要。这个问题相对来说还是比较普遍的，尤其就是说开始用了过去时但是写着写着慢慢就忘记了就变成现在时了。。

总的来说可以归结为一句话，就是对文句的整体意识不够强，写文是一个片语一个片语地写而不是一句一句地写的。句法是英语语法的灵魂，如果扎实掌握，就算简单，搭配适当的选词，也可以写得很好–我给了你一个例子。所以请细心+努力~

kroseUID: 3046161

5.5号的

Agree or disagree. It is better to take the most difficult or challenging course in college or university even though you probably won't receive the top grade.

People always go into rapture at the mere mention of the life of college or university they live in, bacause college and university is a paradise that fill with knowledge . Some people piont out that it is better to take the most difficult course in college or unversity even though you won't be the best in the course. As far as I am concerned, I don't agree with this kind of statement.

To begin with,the most difficult course may not the course that you are interested in. Studying in college or university is a long-term work which need enormous patience and persistence, thus if you want to achieve colossal accomplishment in the field of your research, you must always keep with vigor and energy. It is the interest that prospels people to study by their desire and makes their way to success. However, when you face a difficult or challenging course, and you feel laborious and bored on it, hence you can not definitely study this course well. For instance, I have a friend named Emily. When he is in high school, english and history arehis love. He likes to learn these two subject, but he completely hates maths. Generally, for many students in high school in China, maths are the most difficult subject as well as to Emily, and they have to learn it because they will take park in the examination. Thus, Emily has spended considerably number of time on maths but he still can not gained a top grade. He was so distress beacause his endeavor cannot exchange for a top grade he wish. In my prospective, the primary reason why Emily cannot became best on maths because he does not interest in it.

More important, the difficult or challenging course maybe mean nothing for you. I mean the reason why people go to college or university is that they want to learn something useful and practical, because all of students will leave college or unversity to go into society. They need a job for their livelihood. Therefore, they should adequately take advantage of their time in college or unversity. We should put our time in those course which is meaningful and useful in our thought. You can imagine that if Edison never spends a large number of time on technology research instead of painting, maybe we will use candle to illuminate forever.

Nevertheless, those difficult or challenging course can extend people's  horizen and boost people's ability of study, because we usually have to face something we don't interested in but we should understand in our life . For example, even though you don't like these kind of course but you have to learn it because you will face the finally examination in college or university.

In conclusion, It is unnecessary for your to coerce youself to learn those course which are difficult and challenging and you don’t like them. We should make use of our time in college or university, learning something useful or which you are interested in. As a reasult, I don’t agree with the statement that we should take most difficult or challenging course in college or university before they know which course they like to learn.

mpromanusUID: 2565872

3# krose

Agree or disagree. It is better to take the most difficult or challenging course in college or university even though you probably won't receive the top grade.

People always go into rapture at the mere mention of the life of college or university they live in (1. Not all people lived in or attended universities/colleges. 2. Not all universities are residential i.e. students will live on-campus --> you can’t really say ‘always’ in this sentence. Always think twice before you write ‘always’. If you’re trying to describe a universal fact, you usually don’t need ‘always’, e.g. ‘Children sleep more than the elderly.’ If what you describe is not a universal fact, then you can’t really use ‘always’.), because college and university is a paradise that filled with knowledge. Some people point out that it is better to take the most difficult course in college or university even though you won't be the best in the course. As far as I am concerned, I don't agree with this kind of statement.

To begin with, the most difficult course may not be the course that (The omission of ‘that’ here is optional. I prefer to omit ‘that’ if the following phrase is short.) you are interested in. Studying in college or university is a long-term work which needs enormous patience and persistence, thus if you want to achieve any colossal (I have personal reservations on this..I’d say if you want to achieve anything in scientific research, you must already be always going strong. It’s that competitive. What a ‘colossal’ achievement needs is certainly beyond just ‘vigor and energy’.) accomplishment in the field of your research, you must always keep with vigor and energy. It is the interest that prospels people to study by their desires and makes (The form of this ‘make’ depends on which previous verb you intend to pair it up with via that ‘and’. If this ‘make’ pairs with ‘to study’, then it should be ‘to make’. If it pairs with ‘propels’, then there should be a comma before the ‘and’. That’s what I mean when I say you don’t have a 整体感觉 of your sentence. You aren’t really aware that there is a larger structure around the ‘and’. The meaning of your sentence can be different depending on how you balance this structure on both sides of the ‘and’.) their way to success. However, when you face a difficult or challenging course, and you feel laborious and bored on it. Hence you cannot definitely cannot study this course well. For instance, I have a friend named Emily. When he (‘Emily’ is a girl’s name, unless you’re talking about ‘Emil/Emile’, the male equivalent of ‘Emily’.) is (Okay..you can use the present tense but the past tense is preferred when you are obviously describe the past.) in high school, english and history are his loves. He likes to learn these two subjects (Repetition.), but he completely hates maths. Generally, for many students in high school in China, maths is the most difficult subject as well as it is for Emily (Actually this should be the other way round, 'Maths is the most difficult subject for Emile as it is for many students..'), and they have to learn it because they will take part in the examination. Thus, Emily has spent considerable number of time on maths but he still cannot gained a top grade. He was so distressed beacause his endeavor cannot exchange for a top grade he wishes for. In my prospective, the primary reason why Emily cannot become the best on maths because he is not interested in it. (The question is not asking you to explain why you cannot do well in a difficult subject – the question has already acknowledged this – you may not do well if your chosen course is difficult - as a given fact. You don’t need to re-prove it. Even if you choose to explain why, the explanation should be precise and very short. The question is asking if it is better to take the most difficult, challenging course. If you are not agreeing with the statement, then your point is to prove that doing it is not better (than not doing it, presumably). Your writing has been drifting in and out of this central idea without a clear focus, because you don’t really have a clear statement of your exact point. Yes, you’ve said that you don’t agree, but that’s only your attitude on the question’s opinion, not your opinion. If you can keep your focus, that’s good, but when you can’t keep your focus, then it is perhaps better to spell out your point more clearly so that you have a reference point to go back to.)

More importantly, a difficult or challenging course maybe mean nothing for you. I mean the reason why people go to college or university is that they want to learn something useful and practical, because all of students will leave college or university to go into the society (Okay..if you consider a life in the academia is part of ‘the society’ I guess..). They need a job for their livelihood. Therefore, they should adequately take advantage of their time in college or university. We (I thought you were talking about ‘they’.) should put our time in those courses which
are meaningful and useful in our thought. You can imagine that if Edison never spends a large number (‘Time’ is an uncountable noun so you can’t say ‘a large number of’ time. You can only say ‘a large amount of’ time.) of time on technology research instead of painting (You can only ‘do’ something ‘instead’ of something that you don’t do. You can’t ‘don’t do’ something ‘instead’ of doing something.), maybe we will use candles to illuminate forever. (But Edison never attended university or even studied properly for long. If you use him as an example, you’re not saying people should dedicate time to ‘meaningful’ courses in university. You’re saying people should ditch university altogether to do something more useful. These are entirely different ideas. And, it’s not like painting must be more difficult or challenging than research..I’d actually say it’s otherwise.

Plus, ‘meaningful’ courses can be difficult, or not, and vice versa. It’s not like only easy courses are meaningful or useful. You basically didn’t argue your point at all because, again, your focus keeps drifting. Do NOT use an example just because it appears to be relevant. You have to understand why it is relevant before you can explain it to others.)

Nevertheless, those difficult or challenging courses can extend people's horizons and boost people's ability of study, because we usually have to face something we aren’t interested in but we should understand in our life (I don’t quite understand this. Are you saying ‘we’ll meet similar cases of difficult tasks that we must accomplish in future’? Think about what crucial information you need to bring out in a sentence – in this case it’s ‘similar’ and ‘future’ – and then choose your vocabulary accordingly. If you can’t even tell the logic in Chinese – I can’t, given your original sentence – then you’re not thinking proper.). For example, even though you don't like these kind of courses but you have to learn them because you will face the finally examinations in college or university. (If this course is by choice, that means you don’t need to attend an exam if you don’t choose it, right? So your logic doesn’t come through because you didn’t emphasize that some difficult courses can be ‘required’, and in this case you’d have to face them – even though that’s usually more of the case in China than in the States. Now that’s of course a great significance in education systems of the United States – students have a lot more freedom in choosing their courses, especially advanced ones in their 3rd/final years. But the point is that you can’t write with any assumption that people will know what your ‘standards’ and ‘backgrounds’ are. You have to describe your examples in a way that people understand why things happen like that in your example. If not, your example serves no purpose at all.)

In conclusion, it is unnecessary for your to coerce yourself to learn those course which are difficult and challenging and you don’t like them. (Again, the question is not about whether you ‘like’ the course or not. As said, this question is more or less based on the US system where students choose their modules upon freewill.) We should make use of our time in college or university, learning something useful or which you (I thought you were talking about ‘we’. Do not change the person of the sentence unnecessarily. Again, this is a sign of your habit of writing a sentence accumulatively bit by bit without regard of the entire sentence’s structure or meaning – a lot of inconsistencies and sudden changes.) are interested in. As a reasult, I don’t agree with the statement that we should take most difficult or challenging course in college or university before they (Again. It was ‘we’ when you started this sentence.) know which course they like to learn.

总结：

请注意你的拼写。

语法方面还是说没有整体句子的概念，所以经常一个分句/片语过后时态人称连意思一起乱。

论述方面你完全没有论述到题目，也没有论述到你的任何一个分论点，最后的结论也完全和题目没有关系，因为你的主要论点– 如果课程很难，等于在浪费时间，所以不如学点自己感兴趣的简单有用的– 完全没有被理清。这逻辑本身很难站得住，因为课程难和课程让你感兴趣/有用，这几方面是可以并存的。所以如果你的论点是相反的，你必须清晰证明这两方面不能并存，所以选难的课不好，而不是去说明为什么课程很难就很难学好，课程很难就可能没有用。。

kroseUID: 3046161

Agree or disagree: Teachers should assign homework for students every day.

Homework is indispensable in students school life. It plays a very improtant role for students studies. Somebody says that teachers should assign homework everyday while somebody disagrees. As far as I am concerned, I thought students should do homework everyday.

First and foremost, homework can helps students to recall the knowledge they learn in the day. Obviously, human have a restriction on retention. When students learn something from their teachers, they need doing homework to keep remembering knowledge and absorbing them. However, if they don’t notice this point, it will brings some bad ramifications.
For example, once a day, my English teacher teachs us 50 words in a class, and she assighed these words for homework, but my friend Alex didn't completed it. Thus the next day morning, when our English teacher suddenly examined us how many words did we recited, Alex could remembered none of those words. Unfortunately, he got a C in this examination. Therefore, homework is significant and we cannot neglect the role it plays in studies.

Moreover, having class in school and getting knowledge from teacher are only the first step of studies. If you want to get a high grade in your examination, you should do homework to constantly practise yourself. Through doing homework, it can not only helps you absorbing knowledge sufficently but also improves yourability of studies. More importantly, sometime you thought you understand what teacher says but actually you don't, so this time you need homework to complement yourself. Take myself as an example, I had worked in my mother's factory for 2 months. The first day when I begun to work, the manager teached me some details I need to pay attention to during the work, I told him that I completely understood. But when I begun to work, I found that I still can't did my work well, thus I have to ask him again. This was very embarrassed for me, and I have to practised my work again and again untill I could finished it proficiently. I thought when students study, they will meet the same situation, therefore homework cannot be ignored though you thought you are totally understand.

Last bu not least, homework also is a good way for teacher to know their students' situations of studies. Students will have problem in their homework. Throngh homework, teachers can know what students understand and what they don't understand. So techers can accordingly help them to solve their problem of studies.

In conclusion, without homework, student cannot efficiently assimilate what they have learn, and teachers cannot effectively keep working with their students. Homework is benefit to student, also to teacher. Consequently, I thought it is necessary for teacher to assign homework everyday.

kroseUID: 3046161

发重了

mpromanusUID: 2565872

5# krose

Agree or disagree: Teachers should assign homework for students every day.

Homework is indispensable in students’ school life. It plays a very important role for students studies. Somebody says that teachers should assign homework every day (‘everyday’ is an adjective. ‘every day’ is a noun phrase. You’ve been writing ‘everyday’ instead of ‘every day’ throughout the essay. Please at least check that anything you take from the question directly is written correctly.) while somebody disagrees. As far as I am concerned, I thought students should do homework every day.

First and foremost, homework can helps students to recall the knowledge they learn in the day. Obviously, humans have a restriction on retention (‘retention’ of what? Water?). When students learn something from their teachers, they need doing homework to keep remembering knowledge and absorbing it. However, if they don’t notice this point, it will brings some bad ramifications. For example, once a day, my English teacher teaches us 50 words in a class, and she assigns these words for homework, but my friend Alex didn't completed (Again, you’re mixing present and past tenses. Decide on one and use it consistently. ‘My English teacher taught us…and she assigned…but my friend didn’t complete…’.) it. Thus the next day morning, when our English teacher suddenly examined us on how many words did we recited, Alex could remembered none of those words. Unfortunately, he got a C in this examination. Therefore, homework is significant and we cannot neglect the role it plays in studies. (If your English teacher didn’t ‘suddenly’ examine you, your friend would be okay even if he didn’t do his homework, wouldn’t he? You said homework helps you to ‘keep remembering…and absorbing [knowledge]’, but all I see from the example is that you are simply being tested for memorizing things, and you seem to argue that homework is good for 应付突击考试– and that’s hardly ‘significant’.)

Moreover, having class in school and getting knowledge from the teacher are only the first steps of studies. If you want to get a high grade in your examination, you should do homework to constantly practise yourself. (This sounds like the same thing as from the previous paragraph.)Through doing homework, it can not only helps you in absorbing knowledge sufficiently, but also improves your ability of studies (What ‘ability’ is the ‘ability of studies’ anyway..this is too vague an expression to be meaningful.). More importantly, sometime you thought you understand what the teacher says but actually you don't, so this time you need homework to complement yourself. Take myself as an example; I had worked in my mother's factory for 2 months. The first day when I began to work, the manager taught me some details I need to pay attention to during the work. I told him that I completely understood. But when I began to work, I found that I still couldn't do my work well, thus I had to ask him again. This was very embarrassing for me, and I have to practised my work again and again untill I could finished it proficiently. I thought that when students study, they will meet with the same situation, therefore homework cannot be ignored though you think you are totally understand.

Last but not least, homework also is also a good way for teachers to know their students' situations of studies?? (Do you mean ‘study status’ or something like ‘academic progress’?). Students will have problems in their homework. Through homework, teachers can know what students understand and what they don't understand. So teachers can accordingly help them to solve their problems of studies.

In conclusion, without homework, student cannot efficiently assimilate what they have learnt, and teachers cannot effectively keep working with their students. Homework is beneficial to the student, also to the teacher. Consequently, I think it is necessary for teachers to assign homework every day.

总结：

这篇论述还蛮好，但是语法错误实在很频繁。。一个是拼写，另一个是动词时态变形。。非常怀疑你是不是忘记了can/can’t这类的情态动词后面是永远加动词原形的（can/can’t do）然后过去时是变情态动词（could/couldn’t do）而不是变后面的动词（*can/can’t did, *could/couldn’t did）。。请你好好注意这些动词的变形。。

kroseUID: 3046161

Agree or disgree.Grades(marks) encourage students to learn?

Learning in the school, there are many vital factors that effected students' studies. One of them is grades or marks. Admittedly, such a significant role it plays in students' study life in shcool. Somebody says that Grades or marks encourege students to learn. As far as I am concerned, I am definitely agree with this statement.

High grades or high marks can brings confidence to students, and confidence is an important factor that encouraged students to learn. Confidence is an extremely importanct factor which not only effects students studies and even effects adults career. Generally speaking, if you can get high grades or high marks in your examinations, it means that you are good at those subjects. You will think you are excellent, and you will constantly encourege yourself and keep endeavoring to study. For example , the time when I just came into high school, I definitely hate Maths, because I thought it was very complicated for me. However, in order to passed the finally examination , I have to do my best to learn Maths. To my surprised, I got a very high marks in the first examination. I was so happy and I felt very confident. I told myself that Maths was not complex for me, because I can got a high marks. After that , I was fall in love with Maths. Even now, Maths is still my favourate subject.

However, if students usually get low grades or marks, they will feel dejection ,thus they will lost their confidence. That is very dangerous for students’ development. Most importantly, if they usually fail in their examinations, they may feel inferiority when they see others get high grades or high marks, and the situation will become worse. On the one hand, inferiority can makes students lost interest in studies. For instance, my friend Alex usually got a C in his English examiation, which result in that he felt very dismay, and he thought that he was bad at English and he didn't like to learn it. Therefore he always slept in English classes and never got a A in English during his high school life. On the other hand, low grades or low marks will makes students' parents blame their children, they will discourage their children and make them lost confidence.

In conclusion, high grades or high marks just like catalyst. Without it, the reaction between students and studies can not be accelerate, or even emerge. It plays a very significant role in students life and we definitely cannot neglect it.

kroseUID: 3046161

哎…我刚想到，我写偏题了

mpromanusUID: 2565872

9# krose

Agree or disgree. Grades(marks) encourage students to learn?

Learning in the school, there are many vital factors that effected students' studies (This sentence has two subjects – ‘learning’ and ‘there’. You can either say ‘there are many…that affected students’ studies in school’, or ‘While learning in school, there are…’). One of them is grades or marks. Admittedly, such a significant role it plays in students' study life in school (This kind of structure usually goes like this: ‘such <xxx> that <xxx>’ e.g. ‘such a brat he is that kids in his neighbourhood would avoid him at all costs.’..and yours is not complete.) . Somebody says that grades or marks encourage students to learn. As far as I am concerned, I am definitely agree with this statement.

High grades or high marks can brings confidence to students, and confidence is an important factor that encouraged students to learn. Confidence is an extremely importanct factor which not only affects students’ studies but even affects (‘affect’ and ‘effect’ are different words.. ‘affect’ is the verb and ‘effect’ is the noun. Consult your dictionary if unclear.) adults’ careers. Generally speaking, if you can get high grades or high marks in your examinations, it means that you are good at those subjects. You will think you are excellent, and you will constantly encourage yourself and keep endeavoring to study. For example , the time when I just went into high school, I definitely hated Maths, because I thought it was very complicated for me. However, in order to passed the finally examination, I had to do my best to learn Maths. To my surprised, I got a very high marks in the first examination. I was so happy and I felt very confident. I told myself that Maths was not complex for me, because I could get a high marks. After that, I was fell in love with Maths. Even now, Maths is still my favourite subject.

However, if students usually get low grades or marks, they will feel dejected ,thus they will lose their confidence. That is very dangerous for students’ development. Most importantly, if they usually fail in their examinations, they may feel inferiority when they see others get high grades or high marks, and the situation will become worse. On the one hand, inferiority can makes students lose interest in studies. For instance, my friend Alex usually got (‘usually’ usually goes with the present tense, not the past tense.) a C in his English examinations, which resulted in that he felt very dismay, and he thought that he was bad at English and he didn't like to learn it. Therefore he always slept in English classes and never got an A in English during his high school life. On the other hand, low grades or low marks will makes students' parents blame their children. They will discourage their children and make them lose confidence.

In conclusion, high grades or high marks are just like catalyst. Without it, the reaction between students and studies cannot be accelerated, or even emerge (I think you mean ‘happen’). It plays a very significant role in students’ lives and we definitely cannot neglect it. (Yeah, but you’re supposed to conclude on whether grades/marks – not just the high ones – encourage students to learn..)

总结：

这次时态的一致性有提高哦~但是can/could+动词原型还是没有用对。。

以下是一些到现在为止看到的你持续犯错的动词形态搭配规则：

to + 原型 -> to do homework, to plant a tree, buy a dictionary to help my studies. to后面不加变形。

Help (to), make, must, can/could, should, will/would + 原型
-> help dad (to) wash his car, make my son do his homework, must try again, could not bring herself to it..（切记是could + 原型，而不是can + 过去式）

跑题的事情你自己已经意识到了我就不多说了。。:)

kroseUID: 3046161

Agree or disagree  The most important thing for governments to improve health care are to clean enviroment.

With the rapid development of global economy, humans’ quality of life improves remarkably. However, humans are still facing health problems, such as HIV, SARS and so on. Somebody proposes that government should focus on solving environmental problems in order to reduce serious health crisis. In my perspective, I definitely agree with this statement.

There is no doubt that environment can affect people health directly. My friend Ming had lived in a small town in Hubei province when he was 10 years old. At that time, there were a large number of factories around the small town. Some of these factories were manufacturing chemical productions. They were releasing pollutant day and night, thus they were hurting people’s life. Unfortunately, many residents had got bronchitis including my poor friend Ming. The major reason was that they had absorbed too many contaminated air. Obviously, if government could regulate these factories rigorously, the tragedy would not happen.  Moreover, environmental problems never restrict on a finite area. It can also affect a country or even the whole world. The famous affair, Deepwater Horizon, had almost polluted the whole Gulf of Mexico. It had not only influenced local residents’ health but also injured thousand of sea animal’s lives. Another example, notorious Fukushima, which had happened in 11st March, 2011, was affecting many countries including China, Japan, Korea, and even America. The nuclear crisis had released horrible radiation which could hurt people health. Most importantly, governments had played an ugly role in these two environmental crises. They had not regulated carefully about those crucial facilities and services, and resulted in a large scale of environmental problems, then affected people’s fitness.  

Another point we should take into account is that the relationship between environment and people’s health. Imagining that if you live in a beautiful garden with various kinds of follower, you will work and live with happiness. As we know, psychology health plays a significant role in people’s physiology system. If a person usually lives in a dirty environment, he may feel depressed and his immunity will decline, thus he may sick.Consenquently, government should concern about enviroment's effect. Cleaning the enviroment and then giving people a satisfactory home.

In conclusion, environmental problems should consider first when government want to figure out social health care. We can not underestimate the ramifications that environment bring.

mpromanusUID: 2565872

11# krose

The most important thing for governments to improve health care is to clean the environment.

With the rapid development of global economy, humans’ quality of life (Only humans will talk about ‘quality of life’, so you don’t really need to specify ‘human’s quality of life’, as if animals would also have ‘quality of life’ and you need to differentiate yours from theirs..this is really just a hint of translating directly from Chinese.) improves remarkably. However, humans are still facing health problems, such as HIV, SARS and so on. Somebody proposes that governments should focus on solving environmental problems in order to reduce serious health crisis (If the question goes really as you’ve cited, it is not about just ‘serious health crisis’. It’s about general healthcare – meaning that a cleaner environment would make a better healthcare system possible. It is not very straight-forward but it does make sense. Although I highly doubt that what you’ve written at the top is not the exact wording of the real question..) . In my perspective, I definitely agree with this statement.

There is no doubt that the environment can affect people’s health directly. My friend Ming had lived in a small town in Hubei province when he was 10 years old (You can’t use a single point in time ‘when../at../at the time of../on..’ with the perfect tense ‘have + done <something>’. You can only specify a time period using ‘since…/from…’, because the perfect tense indicates a continuation of action from the point of time specified. If you just want to talk about things at a specific point of time in the past, use the past tense, not the past perfect tense. If you use the past perfect tense, then you’re talking about things/actions that started in the past but continue into the present, and will possibly continue into the future.). At that time, there were a large number of factories around the small town. Some of these factories were manufacturing chemical productions. They were releasing pollutants day and night, thus they were harming (You ‘hurt’ a person’s feelings, not his life.) people’s lives. Unfortunately, many residents had got bronchitis including my poor friend Ming. The major reason was that they had inhaled too much contaminated air. Obviously, if the government could regulate these factories rigorously, the tragedy would not happen.

Moreover, environmental problems are never restricted to a finite area. It can also affect a country or even the whole world. The famous affair, Deepwater Horizon (This is the name of the oil rig. The incident is called the Deepwater Horizon ‘oil spill’. And you don’t usually refer this kind of event as an ‘affair’..), had almost polluted the whole Gulf of Mexico. It had not only influenced local residents’ health but also injured thousand of sea animal’s lives. Another example, the notorious Fukushima, which had happened on 11st March, 2011, was affecting many countries including China, Japan, Korea, and even America. The nuclear crisis had released horrible radiation which could harm people’s health. Most importantly, governments had played an ugly role?? in these two environmental crisis. They had not regulated carefully about those crucial facilities and services, and resulted in a large scale of environmental problems, which affected people’s fitness.

Another point we should take into account is that the relationship between the environment and people’s health. Imagining that if you live in a beautiful garden with various kinds of follower?? (You mean ‘flowers’, yes?) you will work and live in happiness. As we know, psychological health plays a significant role in people’s physiology system. If a person usually lives in a dirty environment, he may feel depressed and his immunity will decline (Actually, if you’re constantly exposed to pollutants, your immunity is supposed to be stronger because it gets more ‘exercises’ and more used to bacteria and all, so to speak..), thus he may be sick. Consenquently, the government should concern about the environment's effect (‘effect’ on what?). Cleaning the environment and then give people a satisfactory home.

In conclusion, environmental problems should be considered first when government want to figure out?? social health care. We cannot underestimate the ramifications that environment pollution? brings.

总结：

这篇的问题，如果你没有写错题目，那么问的是healthcare健保（公立医院，药价，医疗保险这些事情），是一个社会/公共政策问题，而不是health健康/科学问题。。虽然我深切怀疑题目其实不是你写的这个样子的。。

环境和健保有什么关系。。环境好生病少公立健保系统的压力就小大家就都能得到更好的服务。。

你的遣词用句非常直翻。平时看新闻请多看英文报道，避免停留在光知道在说墨西哥湾石油泄漏了事，多注意报道的用词造句，模仿着用，会比你只知道‘墨西哥湾石油泄漏’然后再重新试图从中文报道翻译过去有用。。

mpromanusUID: 2565872

我说的直翻主要是片语和句子的组织上的，肯定不是到逐字翻译那么严重啦，其实严格地说应该是‘受母语的影响’。。这个问题的话，英语作为第二语言的学生多多少少都会有，所以请不要太紧张，慢慢积累会有提高的哦~另外这个是基于我的猜想说你可能是这样想所以写出这样的表达，不一定你就是那么想的，所以如果你觉得有什么地方我猜错了，请主动无视哈~仅供参考，有则改之，无则加勉~

1. human's quality of life 这个我觉得是‘人类的生活质量/水平（有很大提高神马神马的）’过来的。。但就像我说的，其实只有人类才有‘生活质量’这个说法，当你提到quality of life的时候默认就是humans' quality of life了。。所以其实如果提到quality of life一般都是quality of life of/in xx国/xx地 这样很细节的说法，要提到human一般也是human quality of life，很少看到humans’ quality of life这种说法。

2. Another example, the notorious Fukushima, which happened on 11st March, 2011, was affecting many countries…这个感觉有一点受类似‘另外一个例子是发生在2011年3月11号的福岛（核电站）。。’的影响，就是你会去想这是一个长的定语修饰Fukushima，然后就想到要用which从句，结果变成了你的句子是一块一块粘起来的感觉。这个整体的意思其实不需要这么多的曲折，而且我认为需要强调的也应该是‘福岛’，而不是‘例子’：Another example: the notorious Fukushima (nuclear leak) on 11st March 2011 is affecting many countries..’ ‘发生在2011年3月11号的福岛。。’完全可以是一个主语加定语，而不一定非要是主语加定语从句。多考虑你要表达的整体的意思，而不是单纯把句子分成一部分一部分，分别表达出来，再用各种联结绑在一起。。语意应该能够自然地流动flow，让文章更加‘可读’。直翻为什么很不好，就是因为会严重破坏语言的流动。过度使用联结语而不是靠语言组织本身来表现逻辑，也会影响语言的流动。很多母语非英语的人写出来的东西，语法词汇神马都没有问题的，但是flow不够，就会有读起来总有点不舒服的感觉。。

3. governments had played an ugly role in these two environmental crisis 这里我觉得你试图在使用‘扮演xx角色’但是不确定中间的xx是什么。。但是不确定你想用‘在xx事件中扮演xx角色’是受中文还是英文的影响。你想表达的意思其实应该是类似..did a poor job..这样的表达。。后面的when government want to figure out social health care类同。

4. If a person usually lives in a dirty environment..这很明显地受‘某人经常处在不良的学习/工作/生活环境下，造成…’类表达的影响。首先live本身已经包含了usually的意思，所以除非你要强调but sometimes he lives elsewhere这个意思，是不用说usually lives的。。第二environment如果是指大的全球自然‘环境’这个意思，一般也不和dirty搭配。中文的‘环境’实际指的是一个个体周围的小环境而已。。所以我觉得你其实想表达的意思类似于If a person’s living environment is often unclean..我并没有换上什么你不懂的词汇，只是让这个句子更准确地表达你想表达的东西而已。

kroseUID: 3046161

In today's world, to speak well is more important than to write well. Agree or disagree.

There is no denying the fact that to speak well is very important in our daily life. Other people, however, say that people should pay more attention to writing. As far as I am concerned, I think speaking is more important.

First and foremost, we are speaking more than writing in today's world. With the growth of global economy, the communication among people become more frequent. We can find that people are usually communicate with others in oral, such as using telephone, or chating face to face. For example, when my mother was working in her factory, she has a lot of things should deal with, such as managing labors of the factory, or negotiating with her clients, and all of those work need to communicate with others. When a day was over, she almost never stop speaking. Obviously, to be the manager of a foctory, she absolutely should has a wondeful skill of speaking, and actually she did. But she virtually has not wrote an email or a letter or anything other thing in a day. Shen told me that speaking was more efficient than writing in the most time.

Moreover, generally speaking, if a person can speak well, his ability of writing would not too bad, even can be admirable. In my perspective, speaking is a kind of art. It can reflects a person's logical thinking, and writing also need logical thinking. You should speak correct in the right time. In fact, many people who can speak well also may write fascinating articles. For instance , Mao Tse-dong, a distinguished politician, militarist, has lectured in front of hundred of thousand people at the Tiananmen. To be the fist chairman of China, he has a high quality skill of speaking. In addition to communicate with different kinds of officials, he also need to negotiate with international affair with other countries. On the other hand, he also is a famous poet, his peoms has embodied in student's textbook, such as Changsha, Snow, Jinggang Mountain and so on. Clearly, Mao can speak well and also write well.

Nevertheless, we can not say that writing is not important. Writting is also plays a significant role in modern socity. Postgraduates should writing in order to publish their thesis, and high school students should writing so that they could get a high grade in their examinations, and newspaper should write more woderful article to public.

In conclusion, we can't separately observe speaking and writing. We can not ignore the status of writing and can not overestimate the status of speaking. But if I have to choose, I think speaking well is more important than to write well.

kroseUID: 3046161

我觉得我的第3段又写偏了。。哎。。