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3.3 ——Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people thinkchildren should study and play, other people think children should helpwith household chores
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Therehas been a fierce debate about the way to educate our children. Somepeople think what the children need to do is just to study and play,while some others just hold the opposite idea that our children, thoughat an early age, should also help their parents with household chores.As far as I am concerned, it is of great importance to have some of thehousehold done by the children since it not only ensures a harmoniousatmosphere in family, but also is beneficial to the socialization ofour offspring.; k. I) y" x4 o, i* r
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Inthe first place, doing housework can create a compatible atmosphereamong family members, which in turn ensures a good environment for ourchildren’s study and play. The adults, especially the mothers,undertake great burdens everyday from not only the workplace but alsothe heavy household chores such as cooking, washing, and cleaning. Itcan greatly relieve the pressure if their considerate children arewilling to share some of those household tasks. Whit’s more; thecommunication among family members could also be enhanced during thisprocess, which is also a necessity of a harmonious family.2 N! I4 D9 e' q; `
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Inaddition, sharing housework is of great benefit to the socializationprocess of children. Undertaking a task and promising to do their bestto finish it helps to nurture(enhance或者evoke这样吧,我只见过这样用的) their awareness of responsibility, whichis a basic request if someone is to gain success in the future. Take mefor example, when I was a little girl, every time I was asked to buysomething for the family such as salt or sugar, I would take it veryseriously and was always proud of the fact that I was able to finishthe tasks as soon as possible 6 v$ G) z0 Y" d: @( S0 x, c* o
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However,what should be kept in mind by the parents is that besides the benefitsmentioned above, too much housework could also do harm to the children.Burdensome household chores would crowd out the necessary time forchildren’s study and play, as well as rest, which is harmful to thedevelopment of a sound mind and body.(mental and physical health这样会不会更好些)5 W5 I E3 ~, d
' Q: v1 F3 v- r2 P1 n B6 wInconclusion, household tasks, as long as controlled within a reasonableamount, helps to form a melodious(这个好像只修饰音乐啊) family atmosphere and the charactersof consideration and responsibility therefore ensuring a healthy bodyand mind of our next generation.
虽然是第一次写,但是我觉得你写的已经很好了啊,我觉得尤其很赞的一点是你还涉及了做家务和学习玩乐之间的关系,非常好啊。而且我改过来的地方是一些建议替换的地方,你本来写的也挺好的。
最后也不能光夸你一通不给你点建议也不好,你看你的论点有三段是吧,最后一个补丁论点是不是有点太短,我猜你是时间没控制好吧,三段比较均匀一点会更好(我是说更好啊,其实现在已经很好了)
最后还要再次说非常抱歉昨天没能及时给你改。
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