issue150 八月高频 有拍必回！

udoUID：2114276

【题目】
150"Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."
此题是托福作文的第320题。

【提纲】
A.电视和网络增加了人们的旅游兴趣。广告的效应。使人们产生旅游的渴望，更加努力工作挣钱或者尽力安排休假时间来旅游。什么都不可能替代身临其境的感觉！

B.通过电视和网络，人们可以为自己的旅程作出最好的安排，同时可以提高飞机和hotel的入住率。

C.让步。 尽管一些负面报道会暂时使旅游业低迷，但是有利于长期发展。规避风险，为游客着想，赢得声誉。

[fly]【注明】高调做事，八月高频。有拍必回！[/fly]


In modern time, media including television and Internet plays a critical role in tourism industry. In my opinion, they are strongly supporting the booming tourism instead of impeding it.

First of all, nobody will deny the advertisement in television or Internet contributes to the flourish of tourism. For instance, after seeing the beautiful scenery introduction, one will imagine his or her trip to a beautiful city on the Nile. The streets are clean, the surrounding fields are green and fertile, fishing boats ply gently between the many islands and sand banks in the water. Walk through picturesque narrow alleyways and he or she is rewarded by greetings from locals who are to all appearances friendly and helpful. Then, he or she will work hard to earn more money  or strive for taking a holiday to let the dream come true. So, it is obviously that television and Internet are great help of tourism.

In addition, the modern information technology makes it possible to arrange your trip as comfortable as you can even at home. You can order an airplane, book a room in your favorite hotel, and even hire an experienced local guide. This kind of preparation through Internet not only benefits the visitors but also increases the quality of tourism management. The hotels can arrange special discounts in low season according the hotel prearrange rate to attract more visitor so as to increase the efficiency of the hotel. Besides, the airways also can open some temporary flight during traveling busy season. All measures mentioned above will indubitably enhance the profit of tourism industry.

Admittedly, some reports might produces disadvantageously affects on tourisms, such as the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake which generated a tsunami that was among the deadliest disasters in modern history, killing well over 240,000 people, the international outbreak of the illness known as severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) and terrorists struck in the Egyptian Red Sea resort of Sharm el Sheik which killed nearly 88 people, etc. However, as it turns out, the negative surface affects are just temporary. Beijing, once to be a horrific and dangerous city because of the SARS, now welcomes hundreds of thousands of visitors all around the world. It is the same situation in Maldives where has been destroyed by a terrible tsunami. Timely information about the scenic sites can avoid the visitors from unnecessary harm and deduce the loss.

In sum, the highly development of information technology plays an advantageous role in tourism industry. Visitors can find the most valuable information they need and arrange their trip as comfortable as possible, while the visiting cities can earn much more profit than before by increasing the facilities efficiency. Although bad news about some specific scenic sites might cause disadvantageous effects, it is merely temporary and too far to influence the world tourism industry as a whole.

udoUID：2114276

自己顶一下吧，呵呵

ouymUID：2109118

In modern time, media including television and Internet plays a critical role in tourism industry. In my opinion, they are strongly supporting the booming tourism instead of impeding it.

First of all, nobody will deny the advertisement in television or Internet contributes to the flourish of tourism. For instance, after seeing the beautiful scenery introduction, one will imagine his or her trip to a beautiful city on the Nile. The streets are clean, the surrounding fields are green and fertile, fishing boats ply gently between the many islands and sand banks in the water. Walk through picturesque narrow alleyways and he or she is rewarded by greetings from locals who are to all appearances friendly and helpful. Then, he or she will work hard to earn more money （这个有点多余吧！） or strive for taking a holiday to let the dream come true. So, it is obviously that television and Internet are great help of tourism.

In addition, the modern information technology makes it possible to arrange your trip as comfortable as you can even at home. You can order an airplane, book a room in your favorite hotel, and even hire an experienced local guide. This kind of preparation through Internet not only benefits the visitors but also increases the quality of tourism management. The hotels can arrange special discounts in low season according the hotel prearrange rate to attract more visitor so as to increase the efficiency of the hotel. Besides, the airways also can open some temporary flight during traveling busy season. All measures mentioned above will indubitably enhance the profit of tourism industry.

Admittedly, some reports might produces disadvantageously affects on tourisms, such as the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake which generated a tsunami that was among the deadliest disasters in modern history, killing well over 240,000 people, the international outbreak of the illness known as severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) and terrorists struck in the Egyptian Red Sea resort of Sharm el Sheik which killed nearly 88 people, etc. However, as it turns out, the negative surface affects are just temporary. Beijing, once to be a horrific and dangerous city because of the SARS, now welcomes hundreds of thousands of visitors all around the world. It is the same situation in Maldives where has been destroyed by a terrible tsunami. Timely information about the scenic sites can avoid the visitors from unnecessary harm and deduce the loss.

In sum, the highly development of information technology plays an advantageous role in tourism industry. Visitors can find the most valuable information they need and arrange their trip as comfortable as possible, while the visiting cities can earn much more profit than before by increasing the facilities efficiency. Although bad news about some specific scenic sites might cause disadvantageous effects, it is merely temporary and too far to influence the world tourism industry as a whole.

这篇的题目说：因为有了电视、网络，所以人们对他们没有去过的地方都很熟悉，所以旅游也将衰败！  因果关系非常强！
我觉得这篇文章应该用主要的篇幅写“人们对旅游区的熟悉”会导致还是不会导致“旅游业衰败”，然后，再用少量篇幅写一下与“旅游业兴衰”有关的其它方面。
如果这篇文章不存在离题的话，那么我觉得这篇文章的架构不错，很丰满！

amanda1011UID：2106668

【提纲】
A.电视和网络增加了人们的旅游兴趣。广告的效应。使人们产生旅游的渴望，更加努力工作挣钱或者尽力安排休假时间来旅游。什么都不可能替代身临其境的感觉！

B.通过电视和网络，人们可以为自己的旅程作出最好的安排，同时可以提高飞机和hotel的入住率。

C.让步。 尽管一些负面报道会暂时使旅游业低迷，但是有利于长期发展。规避风险，为游客着想，赢得声誉。[这点有点牵强了，还不如就像你文章中简单的说，负面报道有影响，但是只是暂时的。然后适当发挥一下，说我们要考虑游客……]

【注明】高调做事，八月高频。有拍必回！


In modern time, media including television and Internet plays a critical role in tourism industry. In my opinion, they are strongly supporting the booming tourism instead of impeding it.

First of all, nobody will deny the advertisement in television or Internet contributes to the flourish of tourism. For instance, after seeing the beautiful scenery introduction[introduction of scenery], one will imagine his or her trip to a beautiful city on the Nile. The streets are clean, the surrounding fields are green and fertile, fishing boats ply gently between the many islands and sand banks in the water. Walk through picturesque narrow alleyways and he or she is rewarded by greetings from locals who are to all appearances friendly and helpful. Then, he or she will work hard to earn more money  or strive for taking a holiday to let the dream come true. So, it is obviously that television and Internet are great help of tourism.[最后这句有点霸王硬上弓的感觉，呵呵，把great help of 换成一些明确的意思比较好，比如来了繁荣了旅游业，增加了旅游业的收入啦什么的。直接来一句：显然有帮助，这个就牵强了。]

In addition, the modern information technology makes it possible to arrange your trip as comfortable as you can even at home. You can order an airplane, book a room in your favorite hotel[这个介词短语加的怪怪的，三个短语前后两个都没有，中间一个有，结构不平衡的感觉], and even hire an experienced local guide. This kind of preparation through Internet not only benefits the visitors but also increases the quality of tourism management[说得有点含糊，点明visitors不用出门，旅游业提高效率什么的不是更好。说旅游管理的质量太模糊了。]. The hotels can arrange[这个词不恰当，打折是安排的？] special discounts in low season according [to] the hotel prearrange[是根据预定情况吧？prearrange是预先安排的意思] rate to attract more visitor so as to increase the efficiency[没看出折扣跟宾馆效率有什么关系？是利用率吧] of the hotel. Besides, the airways also can open some temporary flight during traveling busy[rush或者high] season. All measures mentioned above will indubitably enhance the profit of tourism industry.[个人感觉不要用太绝对的词，会适得其反，毕竟我们的论证并不是肯定正确，用了极端的词反而引起看官的注意。就像我们看argument里面，出现一些极端的词，也会成为我们攻击的对象。]

Admittedly, some reports might produces[s去掉] disadvantageously[ly去掉] affects[effects] on tourisms, such as the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake which generated a tsunami that was among the deadliest disasters in modern history, killing well over 240,000 people, the international outbreak of the illness known as severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) and terrorists struck in the Egyptian Red Sea resort of Sharm el Sheik which killed nearly 88 people, etc. However, as it turns out, the negative surface affects are just temporary. Beijing, once to be a horrific and dangerous city because of the SARS, now welcomes hundreds of thousands of visitors all around the world. [这句逻辑不对，你要证明的是负面影响只是暂时的。那就应该倒过来用现象来证明啊，应该说，现在又有非常多的游客来到北京－这个曾经遭受SARS袭击的城市。这样才能说明影响是暂时的，过后又会恢复繁荣。说北京欢迎人家，不见得人家要来啊（哈哈，感觉自己argument研究多了，用得是argument的思路了）]It is the same situation in Maldives where has been destroyed by a terrible tsunami.[这句差不多就是废话，说跟人家一样有什么意义？] Timely information about the scenic sites can avoid[protect，avoid是自己避免……] the visitors from unnecessary harm and deduce[reduce] the loss.

n sum, the highly[这是个副词] development of information technology plays an advantageous role in tourism industry. Visitors can find the most valuable information they need and arrange their trip as comfortable as possible, while the visiting[visited，不过觉得应该也不是这么表达，还是用个从句吧] cities can earn much more profit than before by increasing the facilities efficiency[这个词组没看懂]. Although bad news about some specific scenic sites might cause disadvantageous effects, it is merely temporary and too far to influence the world tourism industry as a whole.

[文章整体思路，我觉得没有大问题，就是句子间的逻辑和衔接，以及怎么表达能更充分的论证自己的观点方面再加工一下，呵呵。udo是不是越写越累了，开始一段，写的词句还很精致漂亮，要向你学习，到后面部分错误开始增多了。]

G10T5UID：2101393

In modern time, media including television and Internet plays （play） a critical role in tourism industry. In my opinion, they are strongly supporting the booming tourism instead of impeding it.

First of all, nobody will deny the advertisement in television or Internet contributes to the flourish of tourism. For instance, after seeing the beautiful scenery introduction, one will imagine his or her trip to a beautiful city on the Nile （把Nile移到前面去）. The streets are clean, the surrounding fields are green and fertile, fishing boats ply gently between the many islands and sand banks in the water. Walk through picturesque narrow alleyways and he or she is rewarded by greetings from locals who are to all appearances friendly and helpful. Then, he or she will work hard to earn more money  or strive for taking a holiday to let the dream come true （这句话有添足之嫌）. So, it is obviously that television and Internet are great help of tourism. 刺激旅游者的欲望

In addition, the modern information technology makes it possible to arrange your trip as comfortable as you can even at home. You can order an airplane, book a room in your favorite hotel, and even hire an experienced local guide. This kind of preparation through Internet not only benefits the visitors but also increases the quality of tourism management. The hotels can arrange special discounts in low season according the hotel prearrange rate to attract more visitor so as to increase the efficiency of the hotel （这个和酒店管理质量无关）. Besides, the airways also can open some temporary flight during traveling busy season. All measures mentioned above will indubitably enhance the profit of tourism industry. 这段你想说信息技术有助于安排我们的旅程，还是说有助于提高旅游产业的利润？

Admittedly, some reports might produces disadvantageously affects on tourisms, such as the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake which generated a tsunami that was among the deadliest disasters in modern history, killing well over 240,000 people, the international outbreak of the illness known as severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) and terrorists struck in the Egyptian Red Sea resort of Sharm el Sheik which killed nearly 88 people, etc. However, as it turns out, the negative surface affects are just temporary. Beijing, once to be a horrific and dangerous city because of the SARS, now welcomes hundreds of thousands of visitors all around the world. It is the same situation in Maldives where has been destroyed by a terrible tsunami. Timely information about the scenic sites can avoid the visitors from unnecessary harm and deduce the loss. 这个方面新鲜，可以借鉴一下：）。但是你最好将基调固定在信息有利上面。所以写这段时强调及时的信息可以避免不必要的危险。

In sum, the highly development of information technology plays an advantageous role in tourism industry. Visitors can find the most valuable information they need and arrange their trip as comfortable as possible, while the visiting cities can earn much more profit than before by increasing the facilities efficiency. Although bad news about some specific scenic sites might cause disadvantageous effects, it is merely temporary and too far to influence the world tourism industry as a whole.

写得不错，将第3段的论点在确认一下，或者分成2段写