issue93 G89 6号作业,互拍啊!!!!

vickycy6UID: 2107893

Issue93
The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.

补上提纲：
１反对作者第２句
２从人的本性来说的责任，这都是自愿的而非强迫
３后天教育成的责任也应该称之为出于自己的行为
４进入社会，也许是有被外界限制，但我们应该作为人成长所必要遵守的　
５总结

The existence of a society, which depends on the assembling of different people, inevitablely requires people in that group to obey some limitations. Because it is a collection, better to say a bond of people, while not just one. Consequently, the concept of ''individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. However, in my view, I strongly disagree with the speaker's second content that people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making. On the contrary, I believe that our behavior is largely relying on our own; the external forces are just the instructor for us to get to the right direction.

To begin with, I would like to investigate into the instinct of the human being. Anyone who has the consciousness can make sensible judgments to guide him what he will do. As a mother, she takes the responsibility of foster her child as a sweet burden. Why can our great mother throw her life to education us children? Where does such great power come from? It's the life which formed in her body that gives mother the responsibility accompany with the inborn energy to put all her heart on her children. Such behavior can not be defined as the determination result from the outside forces. It is the instinct for a mother to love her children deeply. An elder brother takes care of his little sister is another example, also the same thing will happen to a boy who met with a gorgeous girl. Such behavior is just the determination of ones own, having nothing to do with the forces coming from the society.

Although much more behavior are formed under education after we grow up, the given responsibility is also a necessities for us to grow up while we still can not consider them as the result of outside forces. The excellent tradition of chinese that respect for the old, take care of the young is a case in point. When I was a little girl know little about the conception of moral or responsibility, my parents told me that I should esteem the old people, and accommodate myself to the younger ones. So till now, I always listening to the old ones opinion with great tolerance and respect, meanwhile, treat the youngs sincerely. To be polite is the behavior decided by myself, not the pressure that the societies give to me.

Admittedly, when we get into the society, we were linked with more clauses which not only come from the society, but also derive from the company, community. Such as the limitation that pay taxes after receiving the money we earn, the punishment for late and leave early. However, those responsibilities are, to some extent, the moral rules we should conform to which give us a direction to grow better. For the stability of a country, a society, a company, only having take out some proper regulations can people in that field get-together more harmony. If someone fingers that it is hard to comply to these regulation, he may not be successful in his future for appropriate rules are one's basic need in living in the world.

Individual responsibility is essential for us. We need to be a high quality person through taking up a series responsibility, which is fulfilled by heart while not take as a burden coming from the outside. In sum, people's behavior is largely depending on their own decision not determined by forces, although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions.

[ Last edited by vickycy6 on 2005-8-9 at 10:17 ]

huangdaoUID: 190018

首先，可以的话 把提纲列出来 可以方便的看出是否跑题
虽然不知道 我自己跑题没 但你不必担心你的方向 看看Ets的范文讲解

Issue93
The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.

The existence of a society, which depends on the assembling of different people, inevitablely requires people in that group to obey some limitations. Because it is a collection？？？ , better to say a bond of people, while not just one. Consequently, the concept of ''individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. However, in my view, I strongly disagree with the speaker's second content that people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making. On the contrary, I believe that our behavior is largely relying on our own; the external forces are just the instructor for us to get to the right direction.

To begin with, I would like to investigate into 可以删掉吧 the instinct of the human being. Anyone who has the consciousness can make sensible judgments to guide him what he will do. As a mother, she takes the responsibility of foster her child这个顺序是不是有问题？foster到底看作动词还是名词？her foster child？as a sweet burden. Why can our great mother throw her life to education ？？us children? Where does such great power come from? It's the life which formed in her body that gives mother the responsibility accompany with the inborn energy to put all her heart on her children. Such behavior can not be defined as the determination result from the outside forces. It is the instinct for a mother to love her children deeply. An elder brother takes care of his little sister is another example, also the same thing will happen to a boy who met with a gorgeous girl. Such behavior is just the determination of ones own, having nothing to do with the forces coming from the society.

Although much more behavior are formed under education after we grow up, the given responsibility is also a necessities for us to grow up while we still can not consider them as the result of outside forces.这句话好难懂啊 但是与上下文的联系呢？ The excellent tradition of chinese that respect for the old， take care of the young is a case in point 不错. When I was a little girl who know little about the conception of moral or responsibility, my parents told me that I should esteem the old people, and accommodate myself to the younger ones. So till now, I always listening to the old ones opinion 不知道是否合适 with great tolerance and 去掉吧 感觉不和谐respect, meanwhile, treat the youngs sincerely. To be polite is the behavior decided by myself, not the pressure that the societies give to me.

Admittedly, when we get into the society, we were linked with more clauses which not only come from the society, but also derive from the company, community. Such as the limitation that pay taxes after receiving the money we earn, the punishment for late and leave early. However, those responsibilities are, to some extent, the moral rules we should conform to which give us a direction to grow better. For the stability of a country, a society, a company, only having take out 时态？some proper regulations can people in that field get-together more harmony. If someone fingers that it is hard to comply to these regulation, he may not be successful in his future for appropriate rules are one's basic need in living in the world.

Individual responsibility is essential for us. We need to be a high quality怪怪的感觉 person through taking up a series responsibility单复数！, which is fulfilled by heart while not take as a burden coming from the outside. In sum, people's behavior is largely depending on their own decision not determined by forces, although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions.

首先好像第一人称用得太多拉 客观 客观  不过可以用自己的例子
语法错误好多 最好先用word改改
短语很丰富  学习  ps：希望不是用金山查的
论证过程感觉怪怪的 好像各段之间的联系太松散了 我也经常犯这种错误
彼此学习吧 加油！

vickycy6UID: 2107893

对不起啊，这么晚才来看到你帮我改了，万分感谢！！
这个题目就好晦涩，提纲写出来了，都不知道对不对：（
a collect那句我是想说社会是一个集体，能怎么说好呢？
错误是好多啊．．．．
现在最主要把自己思路理清，我也不知道这样写对不对．．．．．