Argument117 第13篇寄托四人组8月24日作业

哥哥家有二师兄UID：2124390

------摘要------{结尾是后加的，又没有时间写结尾了}
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：30分1秒     426 words
从2005年7月24日12时12分到2005年7月24日12时30分
------题目------
The following is a memo from the business manager of Valu-Mart stores.
'Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they were in the past. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores.'
------正文------
By appealing to a recent survey and deduction, the manager recommends all the Valu-Mart stores to increase its stock of the office supplies used at home and concludes the office-supply departments will be the most profitable component of the stores. Though the argument bears some merits, a close scrutiny reveals it suffers from several critical flaws which undermine its validity.

The major problem with this argument is that it is based on the unfounded assumption about the work-at-home trend. First, the survey is not convincing enough to prove more people are working at home. No information is given regarding  how many people participate in the survey and if they are representative enough, for the place they live, their occupation, age and the specific occupation they are taking all would have some bearing on the necessity of taking the work back home. In addition, the attitudes of the surveyed are also important because if they are just complaining the heavy load of work, this would also possibly make the survey flawed. Second, even if the survey is valid, it does not automatically mean people would need to buy some office staff at home. There exists the possibility that they have already owned some at home and do not need new ones.

Another problem with the memo is that even granted this trend is true and people do need to buy the home supplies, it does not mean all the stores must increase the stock. In the first place, there might be some regional differences and people in certain areas have more demand of those staff and they can get more stocks; however in some communities people may just purchase quite a little and the present is sufficient. In the second place, the mere measure of getting a large quantity of stock may not work efficiently to ensure them sell well. Because the quality and price are also important factors when the customers are making the purchase; also we cannot rule out the possibility that other stores may have noticed this trend too and they may compete with us. All these factors would have some impact on our profits.

Finally, even granted we take all the efficient measures to ensure out stock sell very well in the market and make a large profit, it does not automatically mean our departments would be the most profitable one in all the stores. It is highly possible that other departments are also making right analysis of the specific market and the potential customers to enhance their profits.

In sum, this conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make it more logically acceptable, the arguer needs to provide more information on a valid survey to prove there is actually the work-at-home trend and the measure of saving enough stock in the stores is the right one. In addition, a more complete comparison of the profits between this department and the others must be presented to support the argument.

bridgewalkerUID：208595

------摘要------{结尾是后加的，又没有时间写结尾了}
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：30分1秒     426 words
从2005年7月24日12时12分到2005年7月24日12时30分
------题目------
The following is a memo from the business manager of Valu-Mart stores.
'Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they were in the past. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores.'
------正文------
By appealing to(学汤剂啦？呵呵~) a recent survey and deduction, the manager recommends all the Valu-Mart stores to increase its stock of the office supplies used at home and concludes the office-supply departments will be the most profitable component of the stores. Though the argument bears some merits, a close scrutiny reveals it suffers from several critical flaws which undermine its validity.

The major problem with this argument is that it is based on the unfounded assumption about the work-at-home trend. First, the survey is not convincing enough to prove more people are working at home. No information is given regarding  how many people participate in the survey and if they are representative enough, for the place they live, their occupation, age and the specific occupation they are taking all would have some bearing on the necessity of taking the work back home.(举例才有说服力，比如就occupation而言，assembly line 上的manual laborer不太可能work at home，而office clerk就可能了。如果调查的主要是后者，那就缺乏代表性了。) In addition, the attitudes of the surveyed are also important because if they are just complaining the heavy load of work, this would also possibly make the survey flawed.(这一点用处不是很大哦!) Second, even if the survey is valid, it does not automatically mean people would need to buy some office staff at home. There exists the possibility that they have already owned some at home and do not need new ones. (比如laptop、email等就可以搞定啦！)
(ETS的官方指导文献(PP3里面有)强调：Argument关键要放在alternative explanation。希望你注意一下。)

Another problem with the memo is that even granted this trend is true and people do need to buy the home supplies, it does not mean all the stores must increase the stock. In the first place, there might be some regional differences and people in certain areas have more demand of those staff and they can get more stocks; however in some communities people may just purchase quite a little and the present is sufficient.(这一点都找到了，强！) In the second place, the mere measure of getting a large quantity of stock may not work efficiently to ensure them sell well. Because the quality and price are also important factors when the customers are making the purchase; also we cannot rule out the possibility that other stores may have noticed this trend too and they may compete with us. All these factors would have some impact on our profits.

Finally, even granted we take all the efficient measures to ensure out stock sell very well in the market and make a large profit, it does not automatically mean our departments would be the most profitable one in all the stores. It is highly possible that other departments are also making right analysis of the specific market and the potential customers to enhance their profits.这一段废啦！other department卖的咚咚都不一样。我觉得应该谈不同类商品利润大小是不一样的。卖汽车的跟卖订书机的哪个更赚？

In sum, this conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make it more logically acceptable, the arguer needs to provide more information on a valid survey to prove there is actually the work-at-home trend and the measure of saving enough stock in the stores is the right one. In addition, a more complete comparison of the profits between this department and the others must be presented to support the argument.

我也写过这一篇，猫头拍的。你有时间可以参考一下：
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ge=1&highlight=

[ Last edited by bridgewalker on 2005-8-24 at 20:23 ]

哥哥家有二师兄UID：2124390

恩,你那个看过了,有启发!
不过你说的pp3的alternative explanation 能否再详细讲下?
我都没看过..

meautoUID：2116250

那个啥,再改几天,我们组的作文都要从一个娘胎里出来了

meautoUID：2116250

呵呵,我变太阳了,果然够水啊我:D

tangjihedeUID：2107695

Originally posted by meauto at 2005-8-24 21:45
那个啥,再改几天,我们组的作文都要从一个娘胎里出来了

亏你好意思说，看你文章里多少T某人的词，甚至整句都照抄过去了！ft啊。

还有GG啊，好像整个第一段都是我的模板啊。。。危险！

[ Last edited by tangjihede on 2005-8-24 at 22:06 ]

bridgewalkerUID：208595

我也要开始抄了！三位小心！