[Try best]ARGUMENT 242 by suzie

yjwn1987UID: 2495078

TOPIC: ARGUMENT242 - The following appeared as an editorial in the student newspaper of Groveton College.

"To combat the recently reported dramatic rise in cheating among college and university students, these institutions should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton's, which calls for students to agree not to cheat in their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect that others have cheated. Groveton's honor code replaced an old-fashioned system in which students were closely monitored by teachers and an average of thirty cases of cheating per year were reported. The honor code has proven far more successful: in the first year it was in place, students reported twenty-one cases of cheating; five years later, this figure had dropped to fourteen. Moreover, in a recent survey conducted by the Groveton honor council, a majority of students said that they would be less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without."
WORDS:371
TIME:--:--:--
DATE: 2009-6-4 下午 06:53:47



This speaker concludes that all the colleges and universities should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton College
(GC) that they can prevent the rising of cheating. To support this conclusion, the speaker cites the fact that the cases of cheating decrease and a majority of students said they will not cheat under the honor code in a recent survey. The argument is problematic in several critical respects.

First of all, an implied antinomy lies in the honor code itself. For if the students can act as the codes requires, there is no need for them to notify a faculty because nobody will cheat in the exam. Apparently, the leaders of Groveton College add the second rule to the code because they consider the honor code as idealistic as well. After all, without a powerful monitor system, it's really a lure for the young students to cheat in the exams. At the same time, if a student himself cheats in a exam, how can we expect him to notify the other cheating ones?
And when the students' promises are not credible even in their teachers’ hearts, it seems that we cannot believe in the function of honor codes.

On the other hand, the data given in the assertion can't be an evidence of the progress in preventing cheating cases. The speaker doesn’t tell us the
students scale of GC. So it's possible that the students scale declines year by year and the cheating ratio of GC doesn't reduce at all.

Even if the honor code is really successful in the GC, it is still unreasonable for all the institutions to copy this action. All appearance,
the conditions of them are different. Perhaps the GC has a tradition of honesty and the students are very highly trained. As the other institutions may not be able to achieve the high moral level as GC, the honor codes is impossible to get the desired results.

In sum, no matter from the theoretical view or the facts, this argument is unconvincing as its stands. For better evaluate the arguer's suggestion, we should know that whether these institutions have the same situation as in Groveton College, and whether the honor code could guarantee a decline in these institutions.

442371236UID: 2636160

This speaker concludes that all the colleges and universities should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton College
(GC) (that they)which can prevent the rising of cheating. To support this conclusion, the speaker cites the fact that the cases of cheating decrease and a majority of students said they will文章是说不太可能不是不会，应will not likely not cheat under the honor code in a recent survey. The argument is problematic in several critical respects.

First of all, an implied antinomy lies in the honor code itself. For if the students can act as the codes requires, there is no need for them to notify a faculty because nobody will cheat in the exam. Apparently, the leaders of Groveton College add the second rule to the code because they consider the honor code as idealistic as well. After all, without a powerful monitor system, it's really a lure for the young students to cheat in the exams. At the same time, if a student himself cheats in a exam, how can we expect him to notify the other cheating ones?
And when the students' promises are not credible even in their teachers’ hearts, it seems that we cannot believe in the function of honor codes.（措辞有点中文化，像最后一句说相信诚信制度的作用，还不如就是believe in honor codes,这样就表达出你想表达的意思  不过我觉得把function改成effectiveness更好了）

On the other hand, the data given in the assertion can't be an evidence of the progress in preventing cheating cases. The speaker doesn’t tell us the
students scale of GC. So it's possible that the students scale declines year by year and the cheating ratio of GC doesn't reduce at all.

Even if the honor code is really successful in the GC, it is still unreasonable for all the institutions to copy this action. All appearance,
the conditions situations 似乎更准确 of them are different. Perhaps the GC has a tradition of honesty and the students are very highly trained. As the other institutions may not be able to achieve the high moral level as GC, the honor codes is impossible impossible 这么绝对啊，not probably or not possiblely更准确吧。to get the desired results.

In sum, no matter from the theoretical view or the facts, this argument is unconvincing as its stands. For better evaluate the arguer's suggestion, we should know that whether these institutions have the same situation as in Groveton College, and whether the honor code could guarantee a decline in these institutions.（最后一句怎么保证作弊减少，这谁能保证）
文章写得仓促，字偏少，措辞可以更地道，至少要精一点。像第一段的function of the honor codes是典型翻译的中文的诚信制度的作用，其实老外只用不要function这次就知道，而且function是一种具体可感的功能，一般指器械的，用这似乎不恰当。嘿，加油。

小红莓UID: 2641349

This speaker concludes that all the colleges and universities should adopt honor codes similar to Groveton College
(GC) that they can prevent the rising of cheating. To support this conclusion, the speaker cites the fact that the cases of cheating decrease（其实不一定是真的下降了，这样说有点绝对） and a majority of students said they will not（也有点绝对了，文章说的是可能） cheat under the honor code in a recent survey. The argument is problematic in several critical respects.

First of all, an implied antinomy lies in the honor code itself. For if the students can act as the codes requires, there is no need for them to notify a faculty because nobody will cheat in the exam. Apparently, the leaders of Groveton College add the second rule to the code because they consider the honor code as idealistic as well. （我觉得这里可以继续展开，否者直接after all显得有点仓促，跳跃性太大）After all, without a powerful monitor system, it's really a lure for the young students to cheat in the exams. At the same time, if a student himself cheats in a exam, how can we expect him to notify the other cheating ones?
And when the students' promises are not credible even in their teachers’ hearts（？？有点雷住我了，呵呵）, it seems that we cannot believe in the function of honor codes.

On the other hand, the data given in the assertion can't be an evidence of the progress in preventing cheating cases. The speaker doesn’t tell us（有点非正式了，最好不要出现you，me，us这种字眼，形容人可以用human,individual这种，不过我也不是很专业，建议在这里只要用show就可以了吧） the（你是不是写作中到句尾你点回车键了？这不是好习惯啊，自己需要另起一段时再点回车，其他时候就让他自己换行吧，否则文章显得有点乱，好像分了很多段一样）
students scale of GC. So it's possible that the students scale declines year by year and the cheating ratio of GC doesn't reduce at all.

Even if the honor code is really successful in the GC, it is still unreasonable for all the institutions to copy this action. All appearance,
the conditions of them are different. Perhaps the GC has a tradition of honesty and the students are very highly trained. As the other institutions may not be able to achieve the high moral level as GC, the honor codes is impossible to get the desired results.（此处寻找的他因似乎少了点，起码要两三个吧）

In sum, no matter from the theoretical view or the facts, this argument is unconvincing as its stands. For better evaluate the arguer's suggestion, we should know that whether these institutions have the same situation as in Groveton College, and whether the honor code could guarantee a decline in these institutions.

总评：字数好像少了点，论证也不太深入，不过基本谬误都找到了，建议在论证方面加强一些啊。我对本篇的修改有点力不从心，因为今天发生的事吧。请见谅...