0910G 同主题写作第七期 Argument101 NLT小组 By Sara

sara550827UID: 2549787

写了半天也就写了这么点字数，词汇量小，总觉得自己在重复，写的过程很痛苦，希望大家多多指出我的不足啊～～谢谢:loveliness:

101The following appeared in a memo from the president of a company that makes breakfast cereals.

"In a recent study, subjects who ate soybeans at least five times per week had significantly lower cholesterol levels than subjects who ate no soy products. By fortifying our Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, we can increase sales by appealing to additional consumers who are concerned about their health. This new version of Wheat-O should increase company profits and, at the same time, improve the health of our customers."

Based on the research involving the soybean eaters, the president argues that by fortifying their Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, they can attract more consumers and thus increase the profits of their company. I find the argument unpersuasive for several reasons.

First of all, the president unfairly assumes that it is because of the soy protein which contained in soybeans that lead to the low levels of cholesterol. The possibility is ignored that some other nutrients in soybean cause the decreasing level of cholesterol. On the other hand, it is possible that without the combining effect with some other substance in soybean the soy protein alone cannot lower the cholesterol level. Thus, only fortifying the Wheat-O cereal with soy protein might make no sense.

Secondly, given that adding soy protein in the cereal can decrease the cholesterol, it does not mean that it can improve the health of their customers. Low cholesterol does not equal to health. Although high cholesterol harasses many people, as cholesterol is an essential component of hormone, too low level of cholesterol may also cause the endocrine disorders. And, this may result in the losing of some customers of the company.

Thirdly, the president does not inform us the cost of fortifying the cereal with soy protein. Perhaps it is too costly that the company’s expectation of increasing the profits cannot come true. One of the possible conditions is that to offset the high cost by adding soy protein, the company raised the price of the Wheat-O cereal. In this case, the customers or potential customers of the Wheat-O cereal are likely to be unsatisfied with the price changing and turn to other companies whose prices may more acceptable to them. Another possible condition is that the company does not raise the price of their products and the change in composition does appeal to more customers. But because of the large amount expenses on the protein adding program, it is still possible that the cost is too high that the increasing income brought by sales growing cannot make up. Without ruling out these possible conditions, the president cannot convince us that the profit of the company will rise.

In sum, the evidences provided by the president cannot strongly support his conclusion. To make the argument more convincing, the president must show that it is the soy protein that works to lower the cholesterol level and no difference exists when the protein is added alone. The president must also remove the negative effects which may cause by protein. Besides, the cost of adding protein in the cereal should be taken into consideration as well.

McNeilUID: 2272415

Mc修改sara Argu 101.doc (68 KB, 下载次数: 6)

2009-6-27 02:18:23 上传

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1# sara550827

其实没重复那么多，挺好的

qianbiziUID: 2460429

不好意思，我以为是截止到今天了。发晚啦，见谅，改得有问题的地方再讨论哦~~

sara550827UID: 2549787

101The following appeared in a memo from the president of a company that makes breakfast cereals.

"In a recent study, subjects who ate soybeans at least five times per week had significantly lower cholesterol levels than subjects who ate no soy products. By fortifying our Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, we can increase sales by appealing to additional consumers who are concerned about their health. This new version of Wheat-O should increase company profits and, at the same time, improve the health of our customers."


Based on the research involving cholesterol level of two groups, one of which eat soybeans regularly and the other do not, the president argues that by fortifying by fortifying their Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, they can attract more consumers and thus increase the profits of their company. It appears to be logic at the first glance, but when take a close look, there leaves several unconvincing assumptions.

First of all, the president unfairly assumes that it is because of the soy protein which contained in soybeans that lead to the low levels of cholesterol. Soybean, a nutritious food, contains rich vitamins, fat, protein, and so on. The possibility is ignored that some other nutrients in soybean cause the decreasing level of cholesterol. On the other hand, it is possible that without the combined effect with some other substance in soybean the soy protein alone cannot lower the cholesterol level. Thus, only integrating the Wheat-O cereal with soy protein might make no sense.

Secondly, given that adding soy protein in the cereal can decrease the cholesterol, it does not mean that it can improve the health of their customers. Low cholesterol does not equal to health. Although high cholesterol harasses many people, as cholesterol is an essential component of hormone, too low level of cholesterol may also cause the endocrine disorders.

Thirdly, without the evaluation of cost and income the president cannot convince us that it is worthwhile to make the change. One possibility is that the potential consumers of Wheat-O cereal do not care about their cholesterol as the president assumes. It is likely that the sales target groups are mainly the young people and for them there is no need to lower the cholesterol level. This condition may lead to no increase in the sales hence in the profit. Another possibility is that the cost which used to produce the new version many be so expensive that the increasing income cannot cover. Granted that the sales would be increase, this may still not enough to offset the cost of production process, advertising, and so on. Thus, the profits expected cannot be guaranteed.

In sum, the evidences provided by the president cannot strongly support his conclusion. To make the argument more convincing, the president must prove that it is the soy protein and only the protein that works to lower the cholesterol level. The president must also remove the negative effects which may cause by protein. Besides, it is crucial for the president to make sure that the change of Wheat-O cereal will necessarily increase the company profits regardless the cost.

gaofei323UID: 2588256

弄好了 看看吧 有问题及时交流~