0910AW 同主题写作第四期 ISSUE144 by iloveusa2009

iloveusa2009UID: 2650557

144
"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."

*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc


Masses people assert that it is the artist, not the critic, to provide lasting value to society. Apparently, critics must bases their existence on artist's creativity work, let down ask them to create lasting value. Common sense indicates that artists create value, and critics try to give meaning to the “value” and make it appreciable to the public. Thus, as people focus on the lasting value of artists, they should also be careful to deal with the critics because the latter’s movement could affect good or bad, about art works.

Broadly speaking, there is a design at work in all art and the artist is the designer. The lasting value of art is not to make it popular or lucrative, but to reveal the ideas and impulses of a society through artist's particular way of creation. An artist's inspiration and creative works reflect the full history of human beings. Compare to the description of historical text, artists use typical and symbolist pattern to show those particular aspect of their era which will embody more personalized emotion experience than the text. Artists provide a context of individual while the historical text routing up collective memory. When people appreciating artistic works such as the Last Supper by Leonardo da Vinci, they will get a new experience which they never felt in the text reading of Paul the Apostle. For those who had never read bible or once chose to ignore the scripture, they are likely to look up relevant information and then get a sense of Christian culture after being impressed by the masterpiece. In this sense, artist's job will be more valuable and unparalleled than the description in a very, matter-of-fact way.

Of course, critics sometimes can also provide value to society, but they will never exist independently without artist while artists can make lasting value without them. Art critics can be defined as those people who evaluate works of art. They usually criticize art in the context of aesthetics or the theory of beauty. Their written critiques, or reviews, are published in newspapers, magazines, books and on web sites. Art collectors and patrons often utilize the advice of art critics as a way to enhance their appreciation of the art they are viewing. However, the real value of art works will always be found by discerning eyes no matter what critics assessed. As connoisseurs appreciating a certain art work, they use empathy to experience more about the artist's creation standpoint and creative process. In contrast, art critics always make impersonal comment on the art work through a observation way. Although objective angle is a normal method to make critique, such works involved art should pay more attention on the skill of mutual emotion which are most lacking in art critics. For that matter, it is senior connoisseurs, not critics to make the value of classical art works appear to society.

Besides, modern artists usually need positive opinions from critics for their work to be viewed and purchased. Although many now famous and celebrated artists were not recognized by the art critics of their time, often because their art was in a style not yet understood or favored. Conversely, some critics, called militant critics have helped to explain and promote new art movements — Roger Fry with the Post-Impressionist movement for example. In addition, the opinion of art critics has the potential to stir debate on art related topics. Due to this the viewpoints of art critics writing for art publications and newspapers adds to public discourse concerning art and culture. Today art critics, such as Jerry Saltz, use art blogs and other online platforms in order to connect with a wider audience and expand debate about art. All these critics' behavior will lead to a new world that art will have greater influence.

In sum, critic as a occupation is objective reality which no one would ever neglect. Artists who created classical art had really given society something of lasting value, and in this area there seem to be less related to critics. On the other hand, modern artists should find a new way to create lasting value which will be more different of classical artists because the time-space had changed and critics play a more important part in modern art movements. Masterpiece was produced in the certain situation by suitable individual response and impulse. Likewise, modern artists can also find a effective way to make better the relationship with their critics in order to make art works which will be expected to be masterpiece in the future.

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Massespeople assert that it is the artist, not the critic, to provide lasting valueto society. Apparently, critics must bases their existence on artist'screativity work, let down ask them to create lasting value. Common senseindicates that artists create value, and critics try to give meaning to the“value” and make it appreciable to the public. Thus, as people focus on the lasting value of artists, they should alsobe careful to deal with the critics because the latter’s movement could affect good or bad, about art works.

Broadly speaking, there is a design at work in allart and the artist is the designer. Thelasting value of art is not to make it popular or lucrative, but to reveal theideas and impulses of a society through artist's particular way of creation. (这里对lasting value的解释很好，如果楼主没看破题思路就这样写就更赞了) An artist's inspiration and creativeworks reflect the full history of human beings. Compare to the description ofhistorical text, artists use typical and symbolist pattern to show those particular aspectof their era which will embody more personalized emotion experience than thetext. Artists provide a context of individual while the historical text routingup collective memory. When people appreciating(appreciate) artistic works suchas the Last Supper by Leonardo da Vinci, they will get a new experience whichthey never felt in the text reading of Paul the Apostle. For those who hadnever read bible or once chose to ignore the scripture, they are likely to lookup relevant information and then get a sense of Christian culture after beingimpressed by the masterpiece. In this sense, artist's job will be more valuableand unparalleled than the description in a very, matter-of-fact way. (达芬奇最后的晚餐的例子很形象的说明了艺术家创造的价值，我没有想到这么好的例子，赞)

Of course, critics sometimes can also provide valueto society, but they will never exist independently without artist while artistscan make lasting value without them. Art critics can be defined as those peoplewho evaluate works of art. They usually criticize art in the context ofaesthetics orthe theory of beauty. Their written critiques, or reviews, are published innewspapers, magazines, books and on web sites. Art collectors and patrons oftenutilize the advice of art critics as a way to enhance their appreciation of theart they are viewing. However, the realvalue of art works will always be found by discerning eyes no matter whatcritics assessed. As connoisseurs appreciating a certain art work, they useempathy to experience more about the artist's creation standpoint and creativeprocess. In contrast, art critics always make impersonal comment on the artwork through a observation way. Although objective angle is a normalmethod to make critique, such works involved art should pay more attention onthe skill of mutual emotion which are most lacking in art critics. For thatmatter, it is seniorconnoisseurs, not critics to make the value ofclassical art works appear to society. (这一段和开头的观点有冲突，详见后面的总结)

Besides, modern artists usually need positiveopinions from critics for their work to be viewed and purchased. Although many now famous and celebrated artists were not recognized by theart critics of their time, often because their art was in a style not yetunderstood or favored. Conversely, some critics, called militant critics have helped toexplain and promote new art movements — Roger Fry with the Post-Impressionistmovement for example. (举了一个具体的人来说明评论家对艺术作品的影响，显得很有说服力，虽然我不认识他^_^)
In addition, the opinion of art critics has the potential to stir debate onart related topics. Dueto this the viewpoints of art critics writing for art publications andnewspapers adds to public discourse concerning art and culture. Today art critics, such asJerry Saltz, use art blogs and other online platforms in order to connect witha wider audience and expand debate about art. All these critics' behavior will lead to a new world that art will havegreater influence. (这一段的波动很大，开头说艺术家应该吸取critic的意见，中间Conversely和In addition说的都是critic如何如何，最后结尾变成了critic的行为对扩大了艺术的影响。artist可以躲到角落里面壁了，建议把开头那句换成更符合整段中心的句子或者干脆去掉)

In sum, criticas a occupation is objective reality(reality是个名词，看起来像是objective在修饰reality而不是一起修饰critic了) which no one would ever neglect. Artists who created classical art hadreally given society something of lasting value, and in this area there seem tobe less related to critics. On the other hand, modern artists should find a newway to create lasting value which will be more different of classical artistsbecause the time-space had changed and critics play a more important part inmodern art movements. Masterpiece was produced in the certain situation bysuitable individual response and impulse. Likewise, modern artists can alsofind a effective way to make better the relationship with their critics inorder to make art works which will be expected to be masterpiece in the future.

蓝色的部分--认为楼主表达的很好的地方
橙色部分—感觉有问题的地方
斜体—各段中的中心句

1 行文很流畅，许多词和句子表达的很自然，显示楼主还是有很强的功底的，貌似楼主说花了3天？坦率的说，我自己的表达水平和楼主还是有差距的；
2 从开头和结尾的中心句来看，整篇文章应该是取的一个neutral的路线，即肯定artist的价值，也不否定critic的作用。比较严重的问题是第三段的论点和总论点相矛盾（详见斜体字标出的部分）。第三段中间的观点是“However, the real value of art works will always be found by discerning eyes no matter what critics assessed.”也就是说critics的作用可以无视，接下来作者又引入了一个没有明确定义的connoisseurs的概念，更加强化了这一点。最后希望楼主以后的文章能更清晰的表达思维哦。

BTW，这是偶第一次正式修改别人的作文，如果说的不对请不要介意哦，我的同主题作文在https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... xtra=#pid1773001844 没有那么好的文采，欢迎楼主和大家来拍哦