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[i习作temp] 【辉太郎杀G大队】7/15业 Issue207 by MC dragonfly [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-7-15 22:21:03 |显示全部楼层
TOPIC: ISSUE207 - "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."
WORDS: 584
TIME: 01:14:13
DATE: 2009-7-15
下午 03:32:54


A ritual and ceremony is a set of actions have special cultural symbolic value, which is often prescribed by religions or the traditional beliefs of a community. Today, the rituals and ceremonies have more social functions other than the religious ones. It plays an important part in stimulating the loyalty of people to some social beliefs and will certainly contribute to our cultural identity. Without them, just as the assertion of the speaker, we lost a good way to build peoples' sense of belonging to their society and group , although they are not the only aspect involved.

The hallowed atmosphere of the ritual and ceremony will certainly solidify people's identity to their basci social roles.
When students of medical college step to their academic learning, the first class for them will be a ceremony to vow for the their devotions of healing the wounded and rescue the dying, which will keep the future doctors to in mind of mercy and conscience of white angels. Taken the world over, there are also many kinds of rituals to claim a child to be an adult. In ancient China,
a ceremony called the "Hat ritual", which the father lay the special hat on his son to acclaim his being a adult, will be given to every men in his twenties. Then the young adults are stimualted to strive for the honor of their ancestors and family.


Another social function of the rituals and ceremonies is to express, fix and reinforce the shared values and beliefs of the society, which helps define a culture. When we are young, none of us can escape the experience of memorizing the hallowed heroes of our society. We respect and hallow the the battle heroes for their bravery and sacrificing spirit for our countries, the scientists for their intelligence and the contributions to knowledge and the political leaders for their creative thoughts and intelligent choice for our society. From the memory ceremony of them, we learn the moral and deeds that our society admires. Some excellence of us will finally turn out to be the great followers of this social admirations and the culture of our society shall last.

Furthermore, the most important social function of the ceremony is its great value on cultural identity to which the two privileges mentioned above somehow contribute. With the globaliztion of modern civilizations, some tradition culture cannot escape the destiny of
being assimilated. The traditional rituals and ceremonies will help a lot to prevent the total cultural assimilation into our modern-day homogenous soup. Considering the native tribes in America and Australia, they clings to their customs and rituals tightly to hand on their tribal heritage and fight against the assimilation, even extinction at the hands of European intruders. Chinese people will hold magnificent ceremony to sacrifice our cultural ancestor, Huang Emperor. This will be positive to build the sense of belonging to our cultural and answer the question whom we are as a matter of course.


Although the rituals and ceremonies plays an important role in cultural identity,it is unnecessary to overemphasize the importance of them. Nor are ritual and ceremony the only means of preserving the cultural identity. For example, the different styles in wearing and other different customs in living will certainly tell the Arabians from Americans.

In summary, Rituals and ceremonies have important social functions on peoples' cultural identity and help to establish a increasing sense of whom they are. But they are not the only means to make such contirbutions.

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发表于 2009-7-19 15:10:43 |显示全部楼层
A ritual and ceremony is a set of actions have
(having) special cultural symbolic value, which is often prescribed by religions or the traditional beliefs of a community. Today, the rituals and ceremonies have more social functions other than the religious ones. It plays an important part in stimulating the loyalty of people to some social beliefs and will certainly contribute to our cultural identity. Without them, just as the assertion of the speaker, we lost a good way to build peoples' sense of belonging to their society and group, although they are not the only aspect involved.


The hallowed atmosphere of the ritual and ceremony will certainly solidify people's identity to their basic social roles. When students of medical college step to their academic learning, the first class for them will be a ceremony to vow for the their devotions of healing the wounded and rescuing the dying, which will keep the future doctors to in mind of mercy and conscience of white angels. Taken the world over, there are also many kinds of rituals to claim a child to be an adult. In ancient China, a ceremony called the "Hat ritual", which the father lay the special hat on his son to acclaim his being a adult, will be given to every men in his twenties. Then the young adults are stimulated to strive for the honor of their ancestors and family.

Another social function of the rituals and ceremonies is to express, fix and reinforce the shared values and beliefs of the society, which helps define a culture. When we are young, none of us can escape the experience
(
换个词比较好,这个词组用得不是很合适)of memorizing the hallowed heroes of our society. We respect and hallow the the battle heroes for their bravery and sacrificing spirit for our countries, the scientists for their intelligence and the contributions to knowledge and the political leaders for their creative thoughts and intelligent choice for our society. From the memory ceremony of them, we learn the moral and deeds that our society admires. Some excellence of us will finally turn out to be the great followers of this social admirations and the culture of our society shall last.

Furthermore, the most important social function of the ceremony is its great value on cultural identity to which the two privileges mentioned above somehow contribute. With the globalization of modern civilizations, some tradition culture cannot escape the destiny of being assimilated. The traditional rituals and ceremonies will help a lot to prevent the total cultural assimilation into our modern-day homogenous soup. Considering the native tribes in America and Australia, they cling to their customs and rituals tightly to hand on their tribal heritage and fight against the assimilation, even extinction at the hands of European intruders. Chinese people will hold magnificent ceremony to sacrifice our cultural ancestor, Huang Emperor. This will be positive to build the sense of belonging to our cultural and answer the question who are we as a matter of course.

Although the rituals and ceremonies plays an important role in cultural identity, it is unnecessary to overemphasize the importance of them. Nor are ritual and ceremony the only means of preserving the cultural identity. For example, the different styles in wearing and other different customs in living will certainly tell the Arabians from Americans.


In summary, Rituals and ceremonies have important social functions on peoples' cultural identity and help to establish an increasing sense of whom they are. But they are not the only means to make such contirbutions.


整个文章用语很流畅,没有什么太大的语法错误
段与段之间的关系也很有逻辑。有一些小的拼写错误,a/an阿之类的,要小心
结尾稍微多写一点,最好可以再概括一下中间段的观点。

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RE: 【辉太郎杀G大队】7/15业 Issue207 by MC dragonfly [修改]

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