Issue1

linlilyUID: 134340

Issue1:
We can usually learn much more from people whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own; disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning.

In my opinion, people can usually learn much more knowledge from dissenters than from people whose views we share.

The sharing of our views whose society background is often the same with us or whose personality is similar with us usually give us too much confidence in our ability. As one of my teacher at university once said:" People whose views is the same with you own can only give you confirmation, then affirm themselves at the same time. They can not find any disadvantage of yours just as they can't know theirs." This illustrates the point that people cannot expect learning more knowledge from those who are of the same mind.

If people get information or suggestion from those whose views he shares only, he cannot make the right decision. The Ming dynasty of ancient China was destroyed when ChongZhen emperor hold the empery's kaiserdom because he did not hear suggestions from ministers whose views were contradict his. He believed all that his minion said and thought what he had done was perfect, and then he did not make effort to evaluate his reputation among people. So, he became the last emperor of Ming dynasty.

People who apt to learn from dissenters have more chance of get better method to solve problems. Mr. Deng is a manager of Bang-bang, a chain of stores selling layette. Some other managers agreed with his plan to open a new store in a big outlying area soon, and others disagreed with him because they thought residents in the area did not used to put money into layette. Mr. Deng accepted his dissenters’ suggestion and advertised their merchandises in the area before the new store opening four months later. After four-month period of continuous advertisement, residents accepted their merchandises soon and then the store were very profitable.

Without people whose views contradict our own, we would find ourselves wallowed in self-satisfaction. Thus, dissenters are important, we can learn more from them.

gteryyUID: 114434

A little bit short.
Your expression is fluent which reflects your well-grasped language ability. However, several aspects remain to be improved.

1.weak logical arguments which is narrow and shallow. For the three paragraphs, you clearly present your point, please reread the three first sentences of each paragraph, find out whether you can make them more logical and stronger.

2.too little arguments. You take three examples for each point, though suitable, they are too simple. Moreover, these examples are not familiar by Americans, the unacquainted conscious of whose feelings may bring you no good impression, though we Chinese understand you.

3.pay more attention to some small phraseological mistakes.

Practise more, you will get progress for sure.

linlilyUID: 134340

Thank you, gteryy!
I'm going to amend it in according to your suggestions and post it again later.

linlilyUID: 134340

When we think about how our knowledge and thought come into being, the perspective is common accepted that we learn much more from people who have the same views with ours than whose views contradict our own. In my opinion, people can usually learn much more knowledge from dissenters because they can know their own shortcoming clearer when others oppugn their standpoint.

The sharing of our views usually gives us too much confidence in our ability. It's easy for us to get yea from other members in the group we are in if each member of group has the same view with us. This kind of confirmation hampers our progress in study rather than helps us. We are prone to believe whatever we think is correct for nobody disagree with us. Once people are over self-confidence, they are inclined to lose interesting about learn knowledge from others or by their own efforts. Then they are in danger that their minds and thought will become narrower and narrower.

If people accept opinions from those whose views they share only, they usually cannot get enough information with which they can make right determine. They often make the final decision before they think over positive and negative factors of a problem, and the wrong decision may lead fatal failure. The Ming dynasty of ancient China was destroyed when ChongZhen emperor hold the empery's kaiserdom because he did not hear suggestions from ministers whose views were contradict his. He believed all that his minion said and thought what he had done was perfect, and then he did not make effort to evaluate his reputation among people. So, he became the last emperor of Ming dynasty. It is illustrate the point that always learn from those whose views share us own, our ability of analyzing and judging reduced because we lack of counterview.

People who apt to learn from dissenters have more chance of get better method to solve problems. When they find their views have some differences compared with others, they are likely to think over it: Why there are different? Have I omitted something important? Such kind of comparison and introspection help them to correct their thought and thus help them to find better way to solve problems. I once read a story of a success man called Mr. Thomas who is a manager of Bang-bang, a chain of stores selling layette. Some other managers agree with his plan to open a new store in a big outlying area soon, and others disagree with him because they consider residents in the area are not used to put money into layette. Mr. Thomas accept his dissenters' suggestion and advertise their merchandises in the area before the new store opening four months later. After four-month period of continuous advertisement, residents accept their merchandises soon and then the store is very profitable.

In sum, without people whose views contradict our own, we would find ourselves wallowed in self-satisfaction. Thus, dissenters are important for us to learn much more knowledge from them to avoid narrower paths of thought or making wrong decision.

linlilyUID: 134340

It is hard for me to find some known samples which can make my argument more effective.
:((

gteryyUID: 114434

When we think about how our knowledge and thought come into being, the perspective is common词性错 accepted that we learn much more from people who have the same views with ours than whose views contradict our own. 逻辑上说，这句话不太合适，这个观点不能算common。In my opinion, people can usually learn much more knowledge from dissenters because they can know their own shortcoming clearer when others oppugn their standpoint. 其实这个观点挺好的，但放在这里有点片面，可以作为你论证的一个观点。这里应该是总的。

The sharing of our views usually gives us too much confidence in our ability. It's easy for us to get yea from other members in the group加个which？我感觉是，不知道语法上是不是需要。 we are in if each member of group has the same view with us. This kind of confirmation hampers our progress in study rather than helps us加线的可以不要. We are prone to believe 少个in。 whatever we think is correct for nobody disagree with us. Once people are over self-confidence词性不对, they are inclined to lose interesting about learn（interests in doing sth./be interested in doing sth.很常用的吧，别忘了） knowledge from others or by their own efforts. Then they are in danger that their minds and thought will become narrower and narrower.(stark等词也可以用啊)
这段论证只和思想观念相似的人交流妨碍思维的扩大发展。

If people accept opinions from those whose views they share only, they usually cannot get enough information with which they can make right determine词性. They often make the final decision before they think over （all the）positive and negative factors of a problem, 这中间有点思维跳跃，起码你再说明一下草率的结论会导致错误的决定，然后才是错误的决定怎么怎么and the wrong decision may lead fatal failure. The Ming dynasty of ancient China was destroyed when ChongZhen emperor hold the empery's kaiserdom because he did not hear suggestions from ministers whose views were contradict his. He believed all that his minion这个词不好，换成adulatory minister比较好 said and thought what he had done was perfect,整体这句表达不太清楚，要不这样“He believed all the words of his adulatory minister said that what he had done was perfect” and then he did not make effort to evaluate his reputation among people. So, he became the last emperor of Ming dynasty. It is多余 illustrate the point that always learnlearning from those whose views share us own we share, our ability of analyzing and judging reduced weakened形容ability比较好 because we lack of counterview.
这段你说了不接受异己的意见会导致考虑问题不全面，容易造成错误的决定。这个例子呢，不是太好。因为往往那些大臣都是有意见不敢说啊，要么就是一味地谄媚。我建议你可以举自己身边的例子或者编：）。比如说你想怎么样，你妈不让，结果你硬去做了，但是错了。。。就这个意思。

People who apt to learn from dissenters have more chance of get better method to solve problems. When they find their views have some differences compared with others, they are likely to think over it: Why there are different? Have I omitted something important? Such kind of comparison and introspection help them to correct their thought and thus help them to find better way to solve problems. I once read a story of a success man called Mr. Thomas who is a manager of Bang-bang, a chain of stores selling layette. Some other managers agree with his plan to open a new store in a big outlying area soon, and others disagree with him because they consider residents in the area are not used to put money into layette. Mr. Thomas accept his dissenters' suggestion and advertise their merchandises in the area before the new store opening four months later. After four-month period of continuous advertisement, residents accept their merchandises soon and then the store is very profitable.
这段你论证与持不同意见的人交流带来的好处。改的不错。

In sum, without people whose views contradict our own, we would find ourselves wallowed in self-satisfaction. Thus, dissenters are important for us to learn much more knowledge from them to avoid narrower paths of thought or making wrong decision.
很高兴你这样认真的改正。进步很明显，再加油，多练练。在句子的组成和结构上再下点工夫。反复的回头去读，一边写一边读（初期不赶时间的情况下），效果很好的。

gteryyUID: 114434

真FT，我用WORD改的，下画线什么居然看不出来！

linlilyUID: 134340

谢谢~~:)