With diligence, I was continuously awarded academic scholarships for four years. Moreover, with Rank 1, I was matriculated by XX for graduate study, and was continuously awarded a Graduate Student Academic Scholarship.
这一段很容易在ps里看到,因为当我把XX系隐去后,你就会发现,任何一个人申请任何系都可以用这句话。。。实在是ps万能句型之一。但是如果稍稍做些改变,就能比原来出彩
比如,With diligence, 太笼统,到底是怎么diligence的?可以是为了写一篇论文泡了多久图书馆,读了多少书;也可以是为了研究一个社会问题,做了多少调研。其实大学四年肯定有很多这样刻苦的例子,写一个进来就会生动很多
was continuously awarded academic scholarships for four years,这一条实在是白写了!本来是多好的推销自己的机会。首先,你得的奖学金是个什么概念的奖,是奖给学习成绩好的呢,还是奖给有科研精神的同学?作者没说;其次,这个奖给了多少人呢?容不容易得呢?作者也没说;最后连得了四年!这是多大的坚持…总之就是,看不到这个奖项的分量,看不到作者得到它的价值,如果改成,都得到了XX奖学金,这个奖学金是颁给成绩优秀,有创造精神的女性学生,是本专业唯一的获奖者,而且是唯一保持四年记录的学生。这样就从品德、成绩夸了自己,而且不露骨,你完全可以说,我只是在陈述这些奖学金的性质,不是在炫耀。而且“女性学生”让这段简历有八卦点,很生动,也符合美国有各式各样奖学金的实情。
with Rank 1, I was matriculated by XX for graduate study, and was continuously awarded a Graduate Student Academic Scholarship.
恩,也是一样问题,尤其是“with Rank 1”…真是太露骨了哇……
同样罗列事实,不推销自己的误区也出现在很多简历里,比如