【09年1月-4月】TOEFL作文互改小组-之【TWE作文】第五次作业-BY 1点50分

1点50分UID: 2474836

In general, the professor discusses the problem of working four days in a week is not beneficial to the company and employees that the reading viewed in an opposing angle.

The first point that the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that the new option may force the companies to spend more, possibility a lot more to hire people.They should train the new employees, find more space and buy more computers. All these increase the companies' cost.So it is reduce the profits of companies.This is differ from the main idea in the material that employees work four days in a week will raise company profits.

In addition, the lecture goes on to discuss the issue that the company may expect employees of four-day to finish their primary five-day work and may require them to work overtime, this poses negative notion against the author's idea is that the new option will help to add the rate of employment.

Finally, the professor states that the employees may face the risks to reduce the quality of life, which challenges the standpoint made by the writer who remarks that the much free time will reduce the pressure of stuffs which make their work more efficient.

To sum up, all the three evidence of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagree with the points mentioned in the reading passage.

ddcmj519UID: 176326

1# 1点50分

In general, the professor discussed the problem of working four days _ a week is not beneficial to the company and employees that the reading viewed in an opposing angle.

The first point that the professor used to cast doubt on the reading is that the new option may force the companies to spend more, possibility?不懂- - a lot more to hire people.They should train the new employees, find more space and buy more computers. All these increase the companies' cost.So it is reducing the profits of companies.This is different from the main idea in the material that employees work four days in a week will raise company profits. ; k4 L* Z- x1 {- g# @: _! P4 n#

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In addition, the lecture goes on to discuss the issue that the company may expect employees of four-day to finish their primary five-day work and may require them to work overtime, 这里不对了，两句之间差一个过渡 thus no new position offered for more people.this poses negative notion against the author's idea is that the new option will help to add the rate of employment.

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Finally, the professor stated that the employees may face the risks to reduce the quality of life, which challenges the standpoint made by the writer who remarks that the much free time will reduce the pressure of stuffs which make their work more efficient.原因没说，low ability in career

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To sum up, all the three evidence of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagree with the points mentioned in the reading passage.时间不够的话完全可以不写

关键点是说出来了，但是缺少一些详细的推导。
而且行文中有不少时态错误。。
加油咯~

nirvanahmjUID: 2534352

In general, the professor discusses the problem of working four days in a week is not beneficial to the company and employees that the reading viewed in an opposing angle.
个人认为前半句的语法有点小混乱，discuss的应该是problem of working four days a week吧？那后面的is算什么呢？当然我语法不咋地，不确定是不是不对。
The first point that the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that the new option may force the companies to spend more, possibility [possibly] a lot more to hire people. They should train the new employees, find more space and buy more computers. All these increase the companies' cost. So it is reduce [it reduces] the profits of companies. This is differ [differed] from the main idea in the material that employees work four days in a week will raise company profits.

In addition, the lecture goes on to discuss the issue that the company may expect employees of four-day to finish their primary five-day work and may require them to work overtime, this poses negative notion against the author's idea (is) that the new option will help to add the rate of employment.

Finally, the professor states that the employees may face the risks to reduce [the risks of reducing]  the quality of life, which challenges the standpoint made by the writer who remarks that the much [more] free time will reduce the pressure of stuffs [staff] which make their work more efficient.

To sum up, all the three evidence [evidences] of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagree with the points mentioned in the reading passage.
总体来说，这篇文章的语法我看起来有点小郁闷，特别是从句方面，就觉得别扭但是我很久不弄语法也弄不清楚怎么改比较好==！然后就内容来看，每一条都说的不是很清楚，就是那种看过文章听过录音的人能懂但是没看过听过的就不能理解了，像是只给了最初的facts就得出最后的结论，逻辑不够。不过每段里面总结的那个句子写的都不错，我喜欢！
土的掉渣，仅供参考。

nirvanahmjUID: 2534352

In general, the professor discusses the problem of working four days in a week is not beneficial to the company and employees that the reading viewed in an opposing angle.
个人认为前半句的语法有点小混乱，discuss的应该是problem of working four days a week吧？那后面的is算什么呢？当然我语法不咋地，不确定是不是不对。
The first point that the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that the new option may force the companies to spend more, possibility [possibly] a lot more to hire people. They should train the new employees, find more space and buy more computers. All these increase the companies' cost. So it is reduce [it reduces] the profits of companies. This is differ [differed] from the main idea in the material that employees work four days in a week will raise company profits.

In addition, the lecture goes on to discuss the issue that the company may expect employees of four-day to finish their primary five-day work and may require them to work overtime, this poses negative notion against the author's idea (is) that the new option will help to add the rate of employment.

Finally, the professor states that the employees may face the risks to reduce [the risks of reducing]  the quality of life, which challenges the standpoint made by the writer who remarks that the much [more] free time will reduce the pressure of stuffs [staff] which make their work more efficient.

To sum up, all the three evidence [evidences] of the lecture illustrate that the speaker disagree with the points mentioned in the reading passage.
总体来说，这篇文章的语法我看起来有点小郁闷，特别是从句方面，就觉得别扭但是我很久不弄语法也弄不清楚怎么改比较好==！然后就内容来看，每一条都说的不是很清楚，就是那种看过文章听过录音的人能懂但是没看过听过的就不能理解了，像是只给了最初的facts就得出最后的结论，逻辑不够。不过每段里面总结的那个句子写的都不错，我喜欢！
土的掉渣，仅供参考。

huangnantaoUID: 2474885

2# ddcmj519



"关键点是说出来了，缺少一定的推导"


请版主赐教，“推导”是怎么一个过程？  是我自己的思维处理？