issue50 divine第六篇

DivineUID: 2650173

TOPIC: ISSUE50 - "In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach."
WORDS: 467  （实际多了50多词）       TIME: 00:55:00 （实际多用了10分钟 一共65分钟）         DATE: 2009-8-2 15:31:14
How can we improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level remains to be a crucial problem of our society. In my view,it is reasonable for the author to suggest all faculty spend time working in professions relevant to the courses they teach, however, this advocation should not be universally appiled. Nevertheless, it is not the only way to solve the problem.


Admittedly, it is beneficient for instructors and professors to work outside college and university in order to improve their teaching. For the reason that
working out side gives them direct experiences other than knowledge from books and their teachers. Also, as a response to the rapid changing world,
they must open themselves to the new development and discoveries of their
professions, only by this process of renewing can they really give their students fresh knowledge concerning their time instead of banal dogmas. The above comments applies best to professors in media, arts and global politics, which never stopped changing. Working outside gives them a acess
to current trends, so they can teach something new.

However, it may not be advisable for all faculty, whatever their professions
are like, to work outside to get the newly information, in specific cases it would even diminish teaching quality. Since some professions are not directly relevant to our daily life, many of them develops just in colleges. These professions, like pure mathematics, mechanics and philosophy, share one thing in common: they are theoratical. Thus there is no job better than a  college professor to improve themselves. Also, some professions have been almot unchanged during a long period of time, making the suggestion invalid as well. For example, professors in ancient language should be better to sink into books than to seek for a job outside. What's more, realizing that working outside occupies much time and energy, it is wise to weigh its benifits together with costs, after which perhaps we'll find it's better for professors to spend their time in research, or in a better concern about students than deviating frome their own job into another.


In addition,  to achieve the improvement of quality of instruction, students as
a crucial role must be emphasized. Faculty who whats to make their instruction more welcome and effective ought to work on their communication skills and teaching abilities. Most of the time it is not how much knowledge one has but how well can he convey the knowledge he has to students that matters. For example, a physics teacher who uses excellent experiments to illustrate his ideas is certainly more welcome than the other one who merely sticks to the textbook all the time. In a word, teaching skills has the same, if not more, importance as knowledge in class.

In short, working outside to gain moreknowledge is a good way for college and university faculty to make their lessons better. But its expense should be considered carefully by taking other factors into accout. After all, quality of education would be improved only when instructors as well as students are all
doing their jobs and they have a good chemistry.

DidasWUID: 2666962

working out side gives them direct experiences other than knowledge from books and their teachers. Also, as a response to the rapid changing world, （首先，他们的老师……好像他们的老师不一定在自己这个大学里面吧……，后面的那个好像也应该是rapidlz changing world）

some professions have been almo（s）t unchanged during a long period of time（这句话一读有点一头雾水，而且建议，profession这个词不是很准确吧，应该用area,subject,major,focus这样的词来表示专业的不同，profession我觉得应该是表示职业不同，比如你是医生我是演员，可能也有专业的意思，但是总用一词感觉单调点。题目里用的PROFESSION是说，在学术圈之外找一份工作，比如consultant,engineer之类，这是我感觉，别砸我……）

具体到思路上
1.有些专业的教授适合去外面工作工作
2.有些专业本身就是学术性的，other profession outside the academic world不一定能让他们更好（我觉得古文字的不好，可以写函数论专家，纯理论数学，数论，理论物理，古文字专家也应该出去多考古，毕竟很多东西书上找不到）
3.出去工作要花上很多精力和时间，要牺牲很多自己埋头做学问的空间，利弊需要衡量
4.有时候需要提高的不是学术而是表达能力。

我的思路……
1.有些学科需要，有些不需要，其根本的原因在于，有些应用学科，比如建筑、设计、临床医学，其关键点在于新，而不在于深。而有些比如文学，史学，哲学，重在对已有材料的掌握和深究，甚至可以说，只有足够的冷静超然和孤独才可以成就好的学术成就（可以联系实际，现在的大学与社会联系越来越紧，但为什么没有Kant Hegel Schopenhauer VanGogh 前三者都是相当牛的老师，一三相当离群，但是成就没人否认）
2.即使考虑了出去会比较好，我们还应该看到，大学的存在有时候不仅仅是教育，还是一种精神旗帜，出外工作很容易让教授变得世俗，功利，这样对精神的污染反而不好。我宁愿要纯洁的学术精神，(世风对大学的污染例子也很多）而且，大学教授不是东西，而是追求东西的方法，很多大学里面教的东西都被忘掉了，实际材料的重要性被overrated，重要的是方法
我觉得给我这两条我就能500到600字了…………第二条我记得有一名言
“universities are the cathedrals of our age, they shouldn't have to justify their existence by utilitarian criteria"David lodge

DidasWUID: 2666962

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... xtra=#pid1773033956
可以的话也回拍一下

nuaaskyUID: 2615912

How can we improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level remains to be a crucial problem of our society. In my view, it is reasonable for the author to suggest all faculty spend time working in professions relevant to the courses they teach, however, this advocation should not be universally appiled（applied？）. Nevertheless, it is not the only way to solve the problem.（个人觉得nevertheless这个词用得不对，前面讲不能被普遍的适用，这里应该讲“所以”therefore怎么怎么才对。第一句貌似也有问题，从句里好像不能用疑问的语气，应该是How we can吧？第二句，我认为for the author纯属多余）

Admittedly, it is beneficient（beneficent？beneficial吧） for instructors and professors to work outside college and university in order to improve their teaching. For the reason that working out side gives them direct experiences other than knowledge from books and their teachers. Also, as a response to the rapid changing world, they must open themselves to the new development and discoveries of their professions, （；）only by this process of renewing can they really give their students fresh knowledge concerning their time instead of banal dogmas. The above comments applies （comments apply这是Word给出的参考建议）best to professors in media, arts and global politics, which never stopped changing（这边修饰的应该是professor吧？professor怎么能which never stopped changing（实际上想修饰media等等吧）呢？我觉得有问题，至少有歧义）. Working outside gives them a acess （an access？）to current trends（少动词，应该是跟上follow current trends？）, so they can teach something new.

However, it may not be advisable for all faculty, whatever their professions are like, to work outside to get the newly information, in specific cases it would even diminish teaching quality. Since some professions are not directly relevant to our daily life, many of them develops just in colleges. These professions, like pure mathematics, mechanics and philosophy, share one thing in common: they are theoratical（theoretical）. Thus there is no job better than a  college professor to improve themselves. Also, some professions have been almot（almost？） unchanged during a long period of time（为什么用这种时态？感觉不太顺）, making the suggestion invalid as well. For example, professors in ancient language should be better to sink into books than to seek for a job outside. What's more, realizing that working outside occupies much time and energy, it is wise to weigh its benefits（benefits） together with costs, after which perhaps we'll find it's better for professors to spend their time in research, or in a better concern about students than deviating frome（from？） their own job（jobs？） into another.

In addition,  to achieve the improvement of quality of instruction, students as a crucial role must be emphasized. Faculty who whats(want?) to make their instruction more welcome and effective ought to work on their communication skills and teaching abilities. Most of the time it is not how much knowledge one has but how well can he convey the knowledge he has to students that matters. （这句话好长，感觉有错你自己读读看费不费力）For example, a physics teacher who uses excellent experiments to illustrate his ideas is certainly more welcome than the other one who merely sticks to the textbook all the time. In a word, teaching skills has the same, if not more, importance as knowledge in class.（开头讲学生是关键角色，但是后面举的确是老师如何提高教学水平的例子。此段前后不一致，大忌）
In short, working outside to gain moreknowledge (中间少空格？)is a good way for college and university faculty to make their lessons better. But its expense should be considered carefully by taking other factors into accout（account）. After all, quality of education would be improved only when instructors as well as students are all doing their jobs and they have a good chemistry.（化学？不懂！）

通读全文，感觉观点不够突出。作者观点应该是说叫all faculty 去professions不是提高教学质量的唯一方法。但是你只分析了让全体教员去professions对于个别专业不适合，论证了去professions有优势，学生应该扮演关键角色。但是你第三个地方完全没说好啊。所以观点前后没有联系，主要观点不突出，叙述不够。
段落之间联系一般。句子的语法结构我觉得个别句子还可以，但是有些句子我看不懂。语法错误经常遇到。
按评分标准，我起评3分。楼主还要多加努力。我个人水平也有限，若有说的不合适的地方，还望见谅。

DivineUID: 2650173

2# DidasW
没错 的确应该用subject比profession更合适一点

不过你要举的例子，那三个人应该算专业者，不是大学老师，这样是否离题了？

我举古文字的意思是，古文字作为一门学科变化不大，所以依靠出去工作来获得最新知识不可行...好像是不太恰当，
这一篇思路有点混乱...

DivineUID: 2650173

4# nuaasky

写得比较仓促，倒数第二段是想说老师需要加强与学生的沟通和传递知识的能力。主题句写错了...
第一段nevertheless简直是瞎用，我是想表示并列的，用个moreover就好了。
这样观点有两层
一是这个方法不适用于所有专业
二是这个方法不能单独解决教学质量问题
最后chemistry是指化学反应 是想说老师需要和学生有好的互动才能促进教学
语法拼写错误也很多，辛苦你看得这么仔细，我一定改...

DidasWUID: 2666962

5# Divine

是说建筑，设计和临床医学么…………
理解成建筑师，设计师和医生确实也可以，确实有道理，是稍微有点点跑。但当时我想的时候，是觉得，大学里教建筑的教授应该常客串下建筑师，教设计的老师应该本身也是一个设计师，是这个意思。
经这么一说，这样在大学里面有涉及的实践技术其实很多很多，他们都应该出去尝试一下除了professor以外的其他职业，这样才有权利说话，不至于误人子弟。

DivineUID: 2650173

我是说Kant他们...
请大家再拍下我修改后的版本吧
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... age=1#pid1773034488

DidasWUID: 2666962

8# Divine 这个你放心
Kant Hegel Schopenhauer都是大学教师，Hegel前期学生爆棚，Schopenhauer的课都没人听，书也没人买，Nietzsche在书店里看到S的一本 作为意向与表象的世界 ，根本没人要，总共带尼采买的才卖出去十几本还是几十本。但是Schopenhauer后期大行其道，尼采也做了点宣传，他有一篇文章就叫《作为教育家的叔本华》（对这方面比较感兴趣，他们三个都是老师是无疑的LZ放心）