Issue93 问题文章详细点评 by imong

yeyedogUID：125746

Issue93"The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making."
The concept of ‘individual responsibility’ has been emphasized by our society, and has even become an indication of people’s maturation. Ever since childhood, to adolescence, to adulthood, people have been taken all kinds of individual responsibilities. The speaker assert that the concept of ‘individual responsibility’ is a necessary fiction, however, I believe though there do exist lots of restraints that can influencerestrict people’s behavior, people’s actions are primarily determined by themselves, according to their individual responsibilities, which are necessary to every single human being and the whole society.个人觉得最后这句话很累赘，拗口。还不如解释一下具体的individual responsibilities,什么叫'individual responsibility'就是你能不能把你做的事不管是好事坏都归咎到人的原因而不是非人的外因，可以说这是个哲学的命题—唯心 VS 唯物。 事实上，统观全文题目在问一个问题你是否同意'individual responsibility'是虚构的？下面我就“不同意”来说明我对这个题目的看法，in personal view（因为我有点唯心） 对于‘同意’可以vice versa。
1，        说明'individual responsibility'不是虚构，人们能够决定很多事以他们的意志，而且这个世界上有许多成就是因为有强大的责任感才得以实现的，一个很极端的例子— Helen, keller. God help those who helps themselves.反过来说，如果人们不能为他们的行为负责，那么人的价值何在。人存在因为他的选择，他不是别人不是机器不是无生命的东西在于他能够自己做选择，而不是submit to外因。他能够为自己的选择负责
2，        像很多人说‘Man proposes and God disposes’ 是错误的。即使在相同的条件下不同的人们用不同的方式去做事。即使在很多不能改变的外因下人们还是能够去选择怎样去面对这些可能很challenge的条件。Beethoven, Lincoln的例子。人们仍然能为他们做的事负责，能为他们的选择负责。
It is human’s nature to lead an unserious life and treat things at one’s pleasure. That is why ‘individual responsibility’ is a necessity concept which involves both the liability to be acquired to give account, as of one’s action or of the discharge of a duty or trust and the answerableness for one’s behavior. The absence of either part in people’s deep heart will reduce感觉这么用不行吧？deteriorate, degenerate them to deal with their work with ease. Moreover, when they encounter some difficulties, they will give up the unsolved problems and turn to something easier. As a result, without ‘individual responsibility’ people will become aimless and the society will come into a state of chaos. So Thus\Therefore the society should emphasize the conceptwhat concept? and hold individuals accoutable for their own actions.

hatty，后面我就不帮你改词法了，上面只是说了个人的看法，不一定对。不好意思！另外我觉得你的定于从句用的太多了，一个好的句子应该有力，就像一个高手出拳应该有力一般而不能拖泥带水。想象一下你一句话说出去了，结果中间，后面跟着一堆的限定，修饰那这句话还有力吗？这一拳还有力吗？当然我不是说定于从句不好，而是不必要的说明（看起来罗嗦的限定）不要有！简单的举个例：there is a flat which has four room. there is a four-room flat.
in the last,最近在实验室被奴役，所以回的有点迟，生怕赶不上你考试的日期。sorry

yeyedogUID：125746

哈，老鬼你也回来了。呵呵！
准备笔试郁闷吧？哈哈。

可以多吃吃这个“天王养心丹”喔。要不‘读书丸’也很不错就是我一直看不到有卖。  

不开你玩笑了。加油阿！