1006G 备考日记 by ieyangj08——行胜于言

ieyangj08UID：2743219

TOPIC: ARGUMENT101 - The following appearedin a memo from the president of a company that makes breakfast cereals.

"In a recent study, subjects who ate soy beans at least five times per week had significantly lower cholesterol levels than subjects who ate no soy products. By fortifying our Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, we can increase sales by appealing to additional consumers who are concerned about their health. This new version of Wheat-O should increase company profits and, at the same time, improve the health of our customers."

WORDS: 409          TIME: 00:29:13          DATE: 2008-3-27 22:05:21

In this memo, the president suggests that in order to increase the profits of company and improve the health of customers, it is necessary to fortify WO cereal with soy protein. At first glance, president's suggestion seems appealing; however close scrutiny revealsthat there are some logical fallacies in the memo that undermines itscredibility.

The threshold problem with this memo lies in that author fails to provide detailed information  about the study such as the total number of subjects in the study. Lacking this information makes his conclusion becomeless statistical reliable. 展开不充分

Even if the study is statistical reliable,the president's suggestion still seems unsound for the simple reason he fails to offer direct evidence that the soy beas is low in cholesterol. Thus, it is entirely other issues such as less eating eggs and red meat that contribute the low in cholesterol. Without ruling out this possibility, author cannot convinceme that eating soybeans would lower cholesterol.

Even if the soybeans do have the functionof reducing cholesterol level, it has no indication that consumers would prefer company's product that mixes it with WO cereal. Perhaps such mixing would result the taste of the product become so bad consumers even those who are most concerned about health are not able to accept its taste. If this is the case,such product will become complete failure in the market. Therefore, failing to accounting this possibility, author cannot make his claim that the product will be appealing to consumers who are concerned their health persuasive.  让步

Finally, even if such product can be accepted by consumers, author's conclusion that it is capable of increasing company's profits is still logical unsound. A common sense informs that the profit of certain product is dependent on its cost and sales. Although this product could gain a good sale in market, its cost is also rising since some soy protein is added to the product.And the president fails to exclude the possibility that the increase in costreaches such a high level that undermines its profits. It this is the truth,president's suggestion become completely unwarranted.  让步，尽量避免二次让步

In sum, this argument is not well-supportedas it stands. To bolster it , president should offer concrete evidence that the product that mixes cereal and soy protein will be good for consumers' health,and this product will be accepted by consumers. Moreover, company should carryout a survey among potential consumers before they make such a decision.

文中单词间的空格省略较多，多少会影响阅读。第二段和第三段可以合并，例子可以更加丰富。后半部分中规中矩。

我的思路
1 胆固醇水平低未必由于吃大豆，可能由于其他原因。两组调查者身体差异，健康、体质差，苗条、肥胖，其他饮食习惯，少吃红肉、鸡蛋等。
2 即使吃大豆可以降低，未必吃我们的新产品可以。豆中的其他成分。
3 新产品未必受欢迎。可能口味会改变，添加豆蛋白后价格可能上升，购买人数可能下降。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

TOPIC: ARGUMENT15 - The following appeared in a newsletter offering advice to investors.

"Over 80 percent of the respondents to a recent survey indicated a desire to reduce their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol, and today low-fat products abound in many food stores. Since many of the food products currently marketed by Old Dairy Industries are high in fat and cholesterol, the company's sales are likely to diminish greatly and their profits will no doubt decrease. We therefore advise Old Dairy stockholders to sell their shares and other investors not to purchase stock in this company."

In this newsletter, the author recommends that Old Dairy (OD) stockholders should sell their shares and other investors should not to purchase stock in OD. To justify this recommendation, the author points out that people want to reduce their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol, according to a recent survey, and that low fat products are abound in many food stores. The author also points out that many food products currently marketed by OD are high in fat and cholesterol. Careful scrutiny of these evidences, however, reveals that this recommendation is unconvincing in several respects.

A threshold problem with the argument involves the statistical reliability of the survey. First, we are informed nothing with respects to the way the poll was conducted and how well the respondents represented the public opinions. Secondly, the author provides no evidence that the number of the respondents is statistically significant. Thirdly, it is highly possible that people inclined to caring their intake were more willing to repond to the survey than were other people. If this is the case, the over 80 percent respondse rate is not persuasive.

Even assuming the result of survey is reliable, the author's reasoning that OD's will no doubt decrease is unjustifiable. First, people's concerns about their intake of foods and their eating of these foods is two things. Next, although the author points out that low fat products abound in many food stores, it is possible that a majority of popular foods remain the kind of OD's products. 需要再说明，逻辑有跳跃Thus, without ruling out this possibility, the author cannot conclude that the profits of OD will no doubt decrease.

Before I come to my conclusion, it is necessary to another flaw appearing in this argument: the author draws a hasty conclusion, merely based on these facts cited in the argument, that OD stockholders should sell their shares and other investors should not to purchase stock in OD. Perhaps, the sales of foods containing fats and cholesterol are not the major sources of OD's revenues. For that matter, after perceiving this trends, perhaps OD would take effective measures to change their products in the near future in order to gain a greater profits. In short, absent additional information concerning these scenarios, I find the author's recommendation is unconvincing.

To sum up, tha author fails to provide key evidence needed to support the recommendation. To bolster that suggestion the author must show that the survey is statistically reliable, To better assess the suggestion the author must also show that the foods containing fats and cholesterol are to a great extent lose their market. Also useful would be any information concerning whether OD has other major sources of profits and whether OD will take measures to deal with the trend.

文章对语言的控制较好，思路清晰，论证还可以更充分的展开

我的思路：
1 未说明调查总人数，可能仅10人回复。10人可能obesity，heart diseases，diabetes
2 未必销量下降。有愿望并不一定买低脂食品。吸烟危害健康，但仍有很多人买烟。口味独特，忠实顾客。
3 店里低脂食物多可能因为滞销。
3 未必不值得投资。该公司还有其他产业，或已经意识到问题在改进。决定投资与否是一件复杂的事情。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

ARGUMENT46 - Although black bears are common in the eastern Canadian province of Labrador, grizzly bears-often similar in color, but much larger-were believed to exist only in the western provinces. Despite a nineteenth-century explorer's account of having startled and narrowly escaped from a grizzly bear deep in the woods in Labrador, modern scientists find no physical evidence that grizzly bears have ever lived in Labrador. But recent research into the language and legends of the Innu, a people who have lived in Labrador for thousands of years, reveals that their language has words for two different kinds of bears, and their ancient legends attribute different characteristics to the two kinds of bears. Therefore, there probably were grizzly bears in Labrador, and the explorer's account probably accurately identified the bear.


The arguer drew two conclusions above. First, there may be grizzly bears in Labrador. Second, the explorer's account probably accurately identified the bear. The reason he provided is that there are two different kinds of bears in the Innu language and the Innu ancient legends attribute different characteristics to the two kinds of bears. There are logical errors in the arguer's deducing, which makes his assertions are unreliable.

For one thing, the main reason the arguer brought forward are the language and legends. 该句逻辑不太严密 The problem is that whether the research of language is useful, or can there be any misunderstanding to the language. Because we don't know whether or not the language research was made by authorities or some one not so professional, we can not firm rely on this search result. 例子有些牵强 Maybe there are some words’ meaning just like grizzly bear, or the description of some other kinds of bears which is similar to grizzly lead the arguer mistaken it as grizzly bears. The legends are neither can be used as evidence. That is only something without evidences support. The arguer seemed to deduce a conclusion with things need warranted, made a serious logical mistake.

Even though there may be grizzly lived in Labrador, no evidence show that the explorer's account is true, let alone to accurately identify the bear. For one thing need to be investigated is whether he really startled and narrowly escaped from a grizzly bear? We must make sure that there were not other reasons that may him to tell a lie. For another, is the report reliable? For it was happened in nineteenth-century, there may be some mistakes in the report which is not so accurate as our contemporary. Another case may be that the explorer had mistaken a bear just be like to the grizzly bear as the grizzly bear.

From analyzed above, we can see that the arguer’s assertions are not persuasive. He should offer more statistic evidence or study reports to give sufficient support to his conclusion, such as studies of the number of grizzly bears or researches did by authorities.

文章的字数有待提高。第二段的推理有些不太严密。对语言的控制能力还有提升空间。

我的思路
1 Innu人语言和传说不能作为证明。另一种熊可能不是灰熊，例如白熊、棕熊或其他熊。传说不能作为科学的证明，只能作为辅助。
2 即使语言和传说为真，也不能灰熊曾在L省。未说明是在L省发现的，可能是Innu人的祖先在西部省打猎、游牧时发现的。
3 Innu人的证据不能证明19世纪探索者的记录为真实的、详细的。两者没有必然联系。惊愕和逃命的瞬间只能大致有印象，不能仔细观察和精确记录。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

TOPIC: ARGUMENT51 - The following appeared in a medical newsletter.

"Doctors have long suspected that secondary infections may keep some patients from healing quickly after severe muscle strain. This hypothesis has now been proved by preliminary results of a study of two groups of patients. The first group of patients, all being treated for muscle injuries by Dr. Newland, a doctor who specializes in sports medicine, took antibiotics regularly throughout their treatment. Their recuperation time was, on average, 40 percent quicker than typically expected. Patients in the second group, all being treated by Dr. Alton, a general physician, were given sugar pills, although the patients believed they were taking antibiotics. Their average recuperation time was not significantly reduced. Therefore, all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as part of their treatment."

WORDS: 448          TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 2008-2-28 16:08:20

In this argument , the author advises that all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as part of their treatment. To substantiate his point, he cites a study consists of two group of people, the people who are given antibiotics recover more quick than other group. At first glance ,this argument seems reasonable, but further inspection shows it suffers from many logical flaws. 第二句繁琐，而且逻辑不严密，可以改为 To substantiate his point, he cites preliminary results of a study of two groups of patients.
   
First and foremost, the study cited in the argument is lack of credibility. Firstly, the study provides insufficient information about two group people's age , sex and physical condition. Without these information, we may think that the first group is consist of people who are young and more healthier than the those in second group. On the contrary, the people in second group may be some old people who have a poor health condition and recovery speed. In this case, the study is invalid to make a comparison. Secondly, the doctor in the two groups are different. Common sense tells us  that the doctor specialized in sports medicine will do better in curing the muscle strain compared with a general physician. Therefore, there is a high possibility that the first group's shorter recuperation time is result form the doctor's better treatment in first group not the function of antibiotics.   该段展开很好，可以再加一句总结性的结束语，以完整结构

Second, the arguer provides no information of the function of sugar pills in the treatment of second group. It's entirely possible that the sugar pill will do some harm in people's recovery. Maybe it is the sugar pill that causes the second group people recuperating slower than group one. Without ruling out this possibility, the arguer can not convince me that the antibiotics will reduce people's recuperation time.  

Even if antibiotics could reduce patients' recuperation time, the arguer unfairly assume that all patients must take antibiotics as part of their treatment. Firstly, the arguer provide no evidence that patients who suffered from muscle strain is likely to get secondary infections. There is a good chance that most of patients suffered from muscle strain don't get secondary infections, therefore using antibiotics will have little effects. Secondly, the side-effect of antibiotics should also be take into patients' consideration. If the antibiotics have many side effects such as damaging one's immune system, nausea, 恶心 vomiting,呕吐 choosing use antibiotics only to reduce recuperation time is not a wise decision.  

To sum up, this argument relies on an doubtful study, which renders it unconvincing as it stands. To strengthen it , the arguer should provide more details of the function of sugar pill and consider the doctor's effect in the comparison. To better improve it, the arguer should also investigate whether the antibiotics have some side effects.

文章整体还行。逻辑严密、思路清晰方面还可以再提升。

我的思路：
1 两组病人的实验不能证明二次受伤使得严重肌肉拉伤难以恢复的假设。实验中未提到二次受伤。
2 实验不能证明抗生素对肌肉拉伤的治疗效果。实验结果可能由于医生的差别。题目未说两组实验的其他因素相同。两组病人的严重情况，治疗方案的差异，医疗设备的差异等。糖丸是否影响恢复？
3 严重肌肉拉伸不一定能推广到所有肌肉拉伸。轻度肌肉拉伸可能不需要使用抗生素。毕竟有副作用，而且较贵。

Argument需要注意论证严密和对语言的控制。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

ARGUMENT150 - The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine.

"The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my conclusion. In 1915 there were seven species of amphibians in the park, and there were abundant numbers of each species. However, in 1992 there were only four species of amphibians observed in the park, and the numbers of each species were drastically reduced. The decline in Yosemite has been blamed on the introduction of trout 鳄鱼 into the park's waters, which began in 1920 (trout are known to eat amphibian eggs). But the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline because it does not explain the worldwide decline."


字数：390          用时：0:30:00          日期：2008-2-28

In this argument, the author claims that the global pollution of water and air is the reason for the decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide. The author cites the results of two studies, and exclude another possible reason to ensure us of its rationality. However, a close scrutiny of the supporting evidences reveals that this argument suffers from several flaws, which render it unpersuasive.

In the first place, the argument is based on the assumption that the numbers of amphibians are declining In the park. However, the author fails to provide any persuasive evidence. Though the author cites the results of two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California, the data of the two studies cannot serve to substantiate his/her assumption. The author does not provide us with any information about the process of the survey. So we cannot make it sure that whether the situation observed by the survey conductor can reflect the true situation of the park. It is quite possible that some of the amphibians in the park has changed their habitats, so the observers have not find them in 1922. Or perhaps the two study had used different method, so it is meaningless to compare the result of them. Any of these scenarios, if true, may serves to undermine the assumption. 两栖动物未必在公园下降

In the second place, the argument is based on the assumption that the numbers of amphibians are declining world widely. However, the author fails to provide us with any information to prove it, such as statistic results of worldwide surveys or worldwide phenomenon which can
reflect the trend. Even assuming that amphibians are declining in the park, the situation in a park cannot represent the situation worldwide. It is quite possible that the decline only happens in Yosemite National Park, and the numbers of amphibians in other places have note declined or even increased. If the author cannot exclude this possibility, he/she cannot make us to believe that the numbers of amphibians is declining world widely. 两栖动物未必在全球下降

In the third place, by exclude the possibility that the decline of the amphibians is caused by the introduction of trout, the author implies that there is no other possibilities. However, there is no evidence to support this assertion. It is quite possible that though the introduction of amphibians is not the reason, the declining of the numbers of amphibians is caused by other reasons, rather than pollution of water and air. For example, perhaps it is the excessive hunting that has caused the decline. Or perhaps the rising global temperature should be blame. If the author cannot exclude these and other possibilities, he/she cannot persuasive us that the pollution is the reason.

In sum, the argument suffers from several flaws which render it logically unpersuasive as it stands. To strengthen the argument, further investigation and analysis should are needed. If so, it will be more thorough and adequate.

文章论证展开充分。段落中心句很有特点，说明假设，否定假设。若能替换段落开头的in the second place 效果将会更好

引用评论中的话
论证推理上的逻辑问题比质疑论据本身的真实可靠更符合ETS的希望。而你用了很大力气——两个段落来攻击真实与否，对这个公园和世界范围视为同一的问题置之不理，个人感觉有一点避重就轻的感觉。 “全球两栖动物减少这一事实，说明全球水和空气被污染了！”这个应该是论证的重点。

我的思路
1 仅用一个公园内两栖动物的减少不能说明全球两栖动物的减少。其他地区可能增加。公园两栖动物的品种有限。
2 全球两栖动物数量减少不能说明全球水和大气的污染。过渡捕捞、气候变暖。
3 公园内两栖动物的减少可能由于其他原因。饲养方式、当地气候变化。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

某个角落好，一起加油：） 102# 某个角落

ieyangj08UID：2743219

Argument 38

The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."


The newsletter recommends that a nutritional supplement calling Ichthaid derived from fish oil is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. As discussed below, however, the argument suffers from several critical flaws and is therefore mot well reasoned.

First of all, the arguert fails to convince me that colds could be prevented by eating a substantial number of fish, for the reason that there are some other alternative explanations. Perhaps people in East Meria are all fond of sports and do exercise regularly. Or perhaps they seldom go to see the doctor just because of the nice climate, the well-rounded medical treatment system as well as the light pressure from work. Moreover, perhaps another substance is also in high consumption in their daily life and does work. 该句有些费解 Owing to the various possibilities mentioned above, the conclusion is far from being guaranteed.

In addtion, the author assumes that Ichthaid which is a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil can help prevent colds and lower absenteeism. However, this is not necessarily the case. Even if eating fish can prevent colds, it has not been provided that Ichthaid is/contains the workable element. In other words, maybe another subject can still do the same thing. In addition, even though it is Ichthaid that can prevent colds, it cannot be warranted that it is useful to everybody. Therefore, there is not enough evidence to demonstrate that Ichthaid can help people keep away from colds. 该段论证不太严密

Further more, it cannot be simply assumed that colds are the reason most frequently for absences from school and work. Given that cold is one reason, it is obviously that the argument neglects the other factors which can also result in the absence, such as the bad weather and the disorderly 混乱的 traffic. Besides, they may mainly account for the absence from school and work. Accordingly, the conclusion remains to be dubious.

Last but not least, the arguer does not take into account the inherent differences between the two places. Admitting that colds could be prevented by eating a substantial number of fish, we cannot assume that this same scenario will work in West Meria. There are a couple of variables that can contribute to the case in East Meria, such as the climate, the lifestyle and some other aspects. Therefore, it is unfair to make this conclusion.

In sum, this argument has been weakened by the flaws mentioned above. More evidence should be provided to warrant that eating Ichthaid can be a way to prevent colds and lower adsenteeism. In order to strengthen the argument, more detailed and scientific studies should be implemented to show that Ichthaid really has a causal link to colds prevention and the reducing of absence from school and work.

文章论证严密性和对语言的控制还有提升空间。

我的思路
1 吃鱼未必是EM感冒少的原因。可能多数人感冒不看医生。即使感冒的人都看医生，也可能由于其他因素，气候，水质，空气等。
2 即使吃鱼可以预防，吃I未必可以预防。
3 吃I未必能减少旷工，旷工还有其他原因，感冒可能是借口。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

TOPIC: ARGUMENT162 - A recent study shows that people living on the continent of North America suffer 9 times more chronic fatigue and 31 times more chronic depression than do people living on the continent of Asia. Interestingly, Asians, on average, eat 20 grams of soy 大豆 per day, whereas North Americans eat virtually none. It turns out that soy contains phytochemicals called isoflavones, which have been found to possess disease-preventing properties. Thus, North Americans should consider eating soy on a regular basis as a way of preventing fatigue and depression.

WORDS: 459         TIME: 0:30:00


The author recommends that North Americans should consider eating soy on a regular basis as a way of preventing fatigue and depression. At first glance, the argument appears to be somehow appealing. However, as discuss below, the author suffer from several critical flaws and therefore is unpersuasive.

To begin with, the author claims that North Americans suffer 9 times more chronic fatigue and 31 times more chronic depression than Asians. However, we do not know the exact number of the patients either/neither on the continent of North America or/nor the patients on the continent of Asia. The single statistic is in sufficient to draw any general conclusion that North Americans are easier to suffer from chronic fatigue and chronic depression. For example, may be the study just investigates some North Americans from big cities such as New York, Chicago, Los Angels, Houston and so on. Common sense and experience tell us that these people may easy suffer from chronic fatigue and chronic depression because their stress is hard. To support the conclusion, the author should provide more information. 调查有效性

In addiction, even North Americans are easier to suffer form chronic fatigue and chronic depression, the assumption that eat 20 grams of soy per day can prevent fatigue and depression is open to doubt. The author fails to establish a causal relationship between soy and fatigue and depression. There are many other facts that lend to the result. For example, the average temperature of Asia is higher than the average temperature of North America, the different in climate may also cause the difference. Or perhaps North Americans prefer hamburger, coke, fried chicken, may be it can also leads to the result of the study. 亚洲慢性疲劳压力小的其他原因，例子详实

Last but not the least, although soy can helps Asians to prevent from fatigue and depression, the conclusion that North Americans should consider eating soy on a regular basis as a way of preventing fatigue and depression lacks credibility. As we know, the body between Asians and North Americans is quite different. May be soy just effects Asians. On the other hand, if North Americans take soy frequently, it may do harm to the body. Without eliminating this possibility, the author can not rely on the study to conclude that eating soy on a regular basis is a way to prevent fatigue and depression. 未必对北美人有效

In conclusion, the author fail to adequately support the recommendation that North Americans should consider eating soy on a regular basis as a way of preventing fatigue and depression. To strengthen the argument, the author should provide more information that North Americans are easier to suffer from chronic fatigue and chronic depression than Asians. To assess the conclusion, I would need more information that soy can really effects North Americans.

文章中心句很有特点，过渡词、条件、结论。例子详实

我的思路
1 调查未必有效，未说明具体人数和调查范围。
2 亚洲人疲劳和压力较少未必是由于吃大豆。工作压力小、生活方式健康等。
3 即使吃大豆的确帮助亚洲人，未必帮助北美人。体质差异、气候差异。
4 大豆能预防慢性疲劳和压力，未必能预防所有疲劳和压力。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

TOPIC: ARGUMENT53 - Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin-a hormone known to affect some brain functions-would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children-now teenagers-who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.

WORDS: 512 (424)         TIME: 上午 12:28:23          DATE: 2006-7-20  修改稿


While the author establishes his conclusion on the basis of a study spanning thirteen years, the argument, however, to me seems a wholly ramshackle 难修复的，摇晃的 one needs to be further scrutinized.  开头简短有力

To begin with, the study conducted years ago is statistically unreliable as it stands. On the one hand, the author fails to render the evidence indicating that the chosen group of 25 infants is basically the same in some other important characters, such as the gender, the age, etc. If these critical characters vary between the two groups, the comparison can only be unfair.  Also, whether the subject is representative of the overall group is dubious, since 25 constitutes such a little portion that it could lend little credence to the subsequent deduction. In view of these statistical unreliability, it is unreasonable to draw any conclusion based on the 25 chosen infants.  好文

Even assuming that the study is substantiated enough, the causality established between the shyness and the chemical secretion of melatonin is unverified, in that the mild distress is probably the symptom of some other feelings, such as dread, or discomfort, rather than the shyness. Besides, due to lack of valid scientific evidence, we cannot preclude the possibility that the melatonin could only work to the mother who created this secretion, while it works little to the infants. Thus, without ruling out all the alternatives, the facts in the argument alone amounts to scant evidence supporting the claimed causality.

Thirdly, conceding the shyness during infancy is related the melatonin, whether the correlation would continue into their later life is open to doubt. The teenagers’ subjective feelings cannot serve as the justifiable evidence tesifying the actual existence of shyness. Perhaps the children make up the fact which misleads the judge of the researchers. Or perhaps the children say so in order to be accord with others. If so, maybe some scientific equipment may be employed in order to measure the existence of the so-called shyness accurately and effectively. Also, there is no evidence that the melatonin continues to be responsible for the shyness. As infants grow up, other external factors would work. For example, the growth environment, includes the family relationship, friends they make, the interests they gravitate to, etc. It seems that many external factors could better explain the shyness than the melatonin does.

In conclusion, the suggestion in the argument is fallacious due to lack of valid evidence and justifiable deduction. To enhance the assertion, more detailed information concerning the sample characters, the efficacy of measurement of the shyness should be provided.

文章展开充分，文笔很好

我的思路
1 调查可信度。未说明调查者其他特征，年龄、性别等。25个样本太少，不具有代表性。
2 内向的原因未必是M的增多。遗传因素、性格等。
3 未能说明持续整个一生。13岁后，随着社交增多可能会有所改变。

ieyangj08UID：2743219

第四次作业终于做完了。30篇Argument，每篇看前先自己分析一下题目，这部分比较占用时间，说明对题库的分析还不熟。有些题目遇到多次，第二次遇见时仍不能清晰回忆起自己上一次的分析，说明题库分析需要多遍记忆。分析题目需要透彻，攻击逻辑推理上的缺陷。论证要严密，开头、段落中心句尤其要注意，要避免推理上的跳跃思维。对语言的控制需要多加练习和积累。

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Active and Passive Voice

Further suggestions for using passive and active voices
1) Avoid starting a sentence in active voice and then shifting to passive.
Unnecessary shift in voice
Many customers in the restaurant found the coffee too bitter to drink, but it was still ordered frequently.
He tried to act cool when he slipped in the puddle, but he was still laughed at by the other students.
Revised
Many customers in the restaurant found the coffee too bitter to drink, but they still ordered it frequently.
He tried to act cool when he slipped in the puddle, but the other students still laughed at him.
2) Avoid dangling modifiers caused by the use of passive voice.  
Dangling modifier with passive voice
To save time, the paper was written on a computer. (Who was saving time? The paper?)
Seeking to lay off workers without taking the blame, consultants were hired to break the bad news. Who was seeking to lay off workers? The consultants?)
Revised
To save time, Kristin wrote the paper on a computer.
Seeking to lay off workers without taking the blame, the CEO hired consultants to break the bad news.
3) Don't trust the grammar-checking programs in word-processing software.  

verbs-voice and mood
1）indicative mood 陈述语气   I need some help.
Examples:He was here.  I am hungry.  She will bring her books.
2）imperative mood 祈使语气  Help me!
Examples:Be here at seven o'clock. (Understood: You be here at seven o'clock.)   Cook me an omelette. (Understood: You cook me an omelette.)  Bring your books with you. (Understood: You bring your books with you.)
3）subjunctive mood 虚拟语气 If I were smart, I'd call for help.
Examples: If he were here... (Implied: ...but he's not.)  I wish I had something to eat. (Implied: ...but I don't.)  It would be better if you had brought your books with you. (Implied: ...but you haven't brought them.)

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Apostrophe 撇号

The apostrophe has three uses:
1）to form possessives of nouns
2）to show the omission of letters
3）to indicate certain plurals of lowercase letters 小写字母

1 Forming Possessives of Nouns
1）To see if you need to make a possessive, turn the phrase around and make it an "of the..." phrase. For example:
the boy's hat = the hat of the boy  three days' journey = journey of three days
2）If the noun after "of" is a building, an object, or a piece of furniture, then no apostrophe is needed!
room of the hotel = hotel room   door of the car = car door   leg of the table = table leg
Once you've determined whether you need to make a possessive, follow these rules to create one.
1）add 's to the singular form of the word (even if it ends in -s):   the owner's car      James's hat  
2）add 's to the plural forms that do not end in -s:   the children's game     the geese's honking
3）add ' to the end of plural nouns that end in -s:  houses' roofs        three friends' letters
4）add 's to the end of compound words:  my brother-in-law's money
5）add 's to the last noun to show joint possession of an object:  Todd and Anne's apartment
2 Showing omission of letters 表示省略
don't = do not   I'm = I am    he'll = he will    who's = who is    shouldn't = should not
didn't = did not    could've= could have (NOT "could of"!)    '60 = 1960
3 Forming plurals of lowercase letters
p's and q's = "Be careful, don't make a mistake." Today, the term also indicates maintaining politeness, possibly from "mind your pleases and thankyous."   Nita's mother constantly stressed minding one's p's and q's.
three Macintosh G4s = three of the Macintosh model G4     There are two G4s currently used in the writing classroom.
many & s = many ampersands    That printed page has too many & s on it.
the 1960s = the years in decade from 1960 to 1969   The 1960s were a time of great social unrest.
4 Don't use apostrophes for possessive pronouns or for noun plurals.
wrong: his' book
correct: his book
wrong: The group made it's decision.
correct: The group made its decision.
wrong: a friend of yours'
correct: a friend of yours
wrong: She waited for three hours' to get her ticket.
correct: She waited for three hours to get her ticket.
5 Proofreading for apostrophes
A good time to proofread is when you have finished writing the paper.  If you tend to leave out apostrophes, check every word that ends in -s or -es to see if it needs an apostrophe.

Hyphens  连字符

1.Use a hyphen to join two or more words serving as a single adjective before a noun:
a one-way street   chocolate-covered peanuts  well-known author
However, when compound modifiers come after a noun, they are not hyphenated:
The peanuts were chocolate covered.    The author was well known.
2.Use a hyphen with compound numbers:
forty-six    sixty-three     Our much-loved teacher was sixty-three years old.
3.Use a hyphen to avoid confusion or an awkward combination of letters:
re-sign重签 a petition (vs. resign辞职 from a job)    semi-independent (but semiconscious)    shell-like (but childlike)
4.Use a hyphen with the prefixes ex- (meaning former), self-, all- ; with the suffix -elect; between a prefix and a capitalized word; and with figures or letters:
ex-husband  self-assured  mid-September  all-inclusive  mayor-elect  anti-American  T-shirt  pre-Civil War  mid-1980s
5.Use a hyphen to divide words at the end of a line if necessary, and make the break only between syllables:
pref-er-ence   sell-ing    in-di-vid-u-al-ist
6.For line breaks, divide already hyphenated words only at the hyphen:
mass-
produced
self-
conscious
7.For line breaks in words ending in -ing, if a single final consonant in the root word is doubled before the suffix, hyphenate between the consonants; otherwise, hyphenate at the suffix itself:
plan-ning    run-ning   driv-ing   call-ing
8.Never put the first or last letter of a word at the end or beginning of a line, and don't put two-letter suffixes at the beginning of a new line:
lovely (Do not separate to leave ly beginning a new line.)
eval-u-ate (Separate only on either side of the u; do not leave the initial e- at the end of a line.)

很细致的语法讲解，好严谨啊

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Parallel Structure

Parallel structure means using the same pattern of words to show that two or more ideas have the same level of importance. This can happen at the word, phrase, or clause level. The usual way to join parallel structures is with the use of coordinating conjunctions such as "and" or "or."
1 Words and Phrases With the -ing form (gerund) of words: Mary likes hiking, swimming, and bicycling.  Parallel

2 With infinitive phrases 不定式:  Mary likes to hike, to swim, and to ride a bicycle.  Parallel   OR Mary likes to hike, swim, and ride a bicycle. Parallel

3 Do not mix forms.
Mary likes hiking, swimming, and to ride a bicycle. Not Parallel
Mary likes hiking, swimming, and riding a bicycle.  Parallel
The production manager was asked to write his report quickly, accurately, and in a detailed manner. Not Parallel
The production manager was asked to write his report quickly, accurately, and thoroughly. Parallel
The teacher said that he was a poor student because he waited until the last minute to study for the exam, completed his lab problems in a careless manner, and his motivation was low.  Not Parallel
The teacher said that he was a poor student because he waited until the last minute to study for the exam, completed his lab problems in a careless manner, and lacked motivation.  Parallel

4 Clauses
A parallel structure that begins with clauses must keep on with clauses. Changing to another pattern or changing the voice of the verb (from active to passive or vice versa) will break the parallelism.
The coach told the players that they should get a lot of sleep, that they should not eat too much, and to do some warm-up exercises before the game. Not Parallel
The coach told the players that they should get a lot of sleep, that they should not eat too much, and that they should do some warm-up exercises before the game. Parallel
The coach told the players that they should get a lot of sleep, not eat too much, and do some warm-up exercises before the game. Parallel
The salesman expected that he would present his product at the meeting, that there would be time for him to show his slide presentation, and that questions would be asked by prospective buyers. (passive) Not Parallel
The salesman expected that he would present his product at the meeting, that there would be time for him to show his slide presentation, and that prospective buyers would ask him questions. Parallel

5 Lists After a Colon. Be sure to keep all the elements in a list in the same form.
The dictionary can be used for these purposes: to find word meanings, pronunciations, correct spellings, and looking up irregular verbs. Not Parallel
The dictionary can be used for these purposes: to find word meanings, pronunciations, correct spellings, and irregular verbs. Parallel

6 Proofreading Strategies to Try
Listen to the sound of the items in a list or the items being compared. If something is breaking that rhythm or repetition of sound, check to see if it needs to be made parallel.

这篇非常实用

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commas

Commas use
1）Use commas to separate independent clauses when they are joined by any of these seven coordinating conjunctions: and, but, for, or, nor, so, yet.
The game was over, but the crowd refused to leave.
The student explained her question, yet the instructor still didn't seem to understand.
Yesterday was her brother's birthday, so she took him out to dinner.

2）Use commas after introductory a) clauses, b) phrases, or c) words that come before the main clause.
a） Common starter words for introductory clauses that should be followed by a comma include after, although, as, because, if, since, when, while.
While I was eating, the cat scratched at the door.
Because her alarm clock was broken, she was late for class.
If you are ill, you ought to see a doctor.
When the snow stops falling, we'll shovel the driveway.
However, don't put a comma after the main clause when a dependent (subordinate) clause follows it (except for cases of extreme contrast).
Incorrect: She was late for class, because her alarm clock was broken.
Incorrect: The cat scratched at the door, while I was eating.
Correct: She was still quite upset, although she had won the Oscar. (this comma use is correct because it is an example of extreme contrast)
b） Common introductory phrases that should be followed by a comma include participial and infinitive phrases, absolute phrases, nonessential appositive phrases, and long prepositional phrases (over four words).
Having finished the test, he left the room.
To get a seat, you'd better come early.
After the test but before lunch, I went jogging.
The sun radiating intense heat, we sought shelter in the cafe.
c）Common introductory words that should be followed by a comma include yes, however, well.
Well, perhaps he meant no harm.
Yes, the package should arrive tomorrow morning.
However, you may not be satisfied with the results.

3） Use a pair of commas in the middle of a sentence to set off clauses, phrases, and words that are not essential to the meaning of the sentence.  
Clause: That Tuesday, which happens to be my birthday, is the only day when I am available to meet.
Phrase: This restaurant has an exciting atmosphere. The food, on the other hand, is rather bland.
Word: I appreciate your hard work. In this case, however, you seem to have over-exerted yourself.

4） Do not use commas to set off essential elements of the sentence, such as clauses beginning with that (relative clauses). That clauses after nouns are always essential. That clauses following a verb expressing mental action are always essential.
That clauses after nouns:
The book that I borrowed from you is excellent.
The apples that fell out of the basket are bruised.
That clauses following a verb expressing mental action:
She believes that she will be able to earn an A.
He is dreaming that he can fly.
I contend that it was wrong to mislead her.
They wished that warm weather would finally arrive.
Examples of other essential elements (no commas):
Students who cheat only harm themselves.
The baby wearing a yellow jumpsuit is my niece.
The candidate who had the least money lost the election.
Examples of nonessential elements (set off by commas):
Fred, who often cheats, is just harming himself.
My niece, wearing a yellow jumpsuit, is playing in the living room.
The Green party candidate, who had the least money, lost the election.
Apples, which are my favorite fruit, are the main ingredient in this recipe.
Professor Benson, grinning from ear to ear, announced that the exam would be tomorrow.
Tom, the captain of the team, was injured in the game.
It is up to you, Jane, to finish.
She was, however, too tired to make the trip.
Two hundred dollars, I think, is sufficient.

5）Use commas to separate three or more words, phrases, or clauses written in a series.
The Constitution establishes the legislative, executive, and judicial branches of government.
The candidate promised to lower taxes, protect the environment, reduce crime, and end unemployment.
The prosecutor argued that the defendant, who was at the scene of the crime, who had a strong revenge motive, and who had access to the murder weapon, was guilty of homicide.

6）Use commas to separate two or more coordinate adjectives that describe the same noun. Be sure never to add an extra comma between the final adjective and the noun itself or to use commas with non-coordinate adjectives.
Coordinate adjectives are adjectives with equal ("co"-ordinate) status in describing the noun; neither adjective is subordinate to the other. You can decide if two adjectives in a row are coordinate by asking the following questions:
·Does the sentence make sense if the adjectives are written in reverse order?
·Does the sentence make sense if the adjectives are written with and between them?
If you answer yes to these questions, then the adjectives are coordinate and should be separated by a comma.  
He was a difficult, stubborn child. (coordinate)
They lived in a white frame house. (non-coordinate)
She often wore a gray wool shawl. (non-coordinate)
Your cousin has an easy, happy smile. (coordinate)
The 1) relentless, 2) powerful 3) summer sun beat down on them. (1-2 are coordinate; 2-3 are non-coordinate.)
The 1) relentless, 2) powerful, 3) oppressive sun beat down on them. (Both 1-2 and 2-3 are coordinate.)

7） Use a comma near the end of a sentence to separate contrasted coordinate elements or to indicate a distinct pause or shift.
He was merely ignorant, not stupid.
The chimpanzee seemed reflective, almost human.
You're one of the senator's close friends, aren't you?
The speaker seemed innocent, even gullible.

8）Use commas to set off phrases at the end of the sentence that refer back to the beginning or middle of the sentence. Such phrases are free modifiers that can be placed anywhere in the sentence without causing confusion. (If the placement of the modifier causes confusion, then it is not "free" and must remain "bound" to the word it modifies.)
Nancy waved enthusiastically at the docking ship, laughing joyously. (correct)
Incorrect is a waved at Nancy, laughing joyously. (Who is laughing, Lisa or Nancy?)
Laughing joyously, Lisa waved at Nancy. (correct)
Lisa waved at Nancy, who was laughing joyously. (correct)

9） Use commas to set off all geographical names, items in dates (except the month and day), addresses (except the street number and name), and titles in names.
Birmingham,Alabama, gets its name from Birmingham, England.
July 22, 1959, was a momentous day in his life. Who lives at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC?
Rachel B. Lake, MD, will be the principal speaker.
(When you use just the month and the year, no comma is necessary after the month or year: "The average temperatures for July 1998 are the highest on record for that month.")

10）Use a comma to shift between the main discourse and a quotation.
John said without emotion, "I'll see you tomorrow."
"I was able," she answered, "to complete the assignment."
In 1848, Marx wrote, "Workers of the world, unite!"

11）Use commas wherever necessary to prevent possible confusion or misreading.
To George,Harrison had been a sort of idol.

12）Don't use a comma to separate the subject from the verb.
Incorrect:An eighteen-year old in California, is now considered an adult.
Incorrect:The most important attribute of a ball player, is quick reflex actions.

13）Don't put a comma between the two verbs or verb phrases in a compound predicate.
Incorrect:We laid out our music and snacks, and began to study.
Incorrect:I turned the corner, and ran smack into a patrol car.

14）Don't put a comma between the two nouns, noun phrases, or noun clauses in a compound subject or compound object.
Incorrect (compound subject):The music teacher from your high school, and the football coach from mine are married.
Incorrect (compound object):Jeff told me that the job was still available, and that the manager wanted to interview me.

15）Don't put a comma after the main clause when a dependent (subordinate) clause follows it (except for cases of extreme contrast).
Incorrect (extreme contrast):She was late for class, because her alarm clock was broken. (incorrect)
Incorrect:The cat scratched at the door, while I was eating.
Incorrect:She was still quite upset, although she had won the Oscar.

Commas After Introductions
1）Introductory Clauses
Introductory clauses are dependent clauses that provide background information or "set the stage" for the main part of the sentence, the independent clause.  Introductory clauses start with adverbs like after, although, as, because, before, if, since, though, until, when, etc.
If they want to win, athletes must exercise every day. (introductory dependent clause, main clause)
Because he kept barking insistently, we threw the ball for Smokey. (introductory dependent clause, main clause)
2）Introductory Phrases
To stay in shape for competition, athletes must exercise every day. (introductory infinitive phrase 不定式短语, main clause)
Barking insistently, Smokey got us to throw his ball for him. (introductory participial phrase 分词短语, main clause)
A popular and well respected mayor, Bailey was the clear favorite in the campaign for governor. (introductory appositive phrase 同位短语, main clause)
The wind blowing violently, the townspeople began to seek shelter. (introductory absolute phrase 独立短语, main clause)
After the adjustment for inflation, real wages have decreased while corporate profits have grown. (introductory prepositional phrases 介词短语, main clause)
3）Introductory Words
Introductory words like however, still, furthermore, and meanwhile create continuity from one sentence to the next.
The coaches reviewed the game strategy. Meanwhile, the athletes trained on the Nautilus equipment.
Most of the evidence seemed convincing. Still, the credibility of some witnesses was in question.

Semicolon (;)
1）Use a semicolon when you link two independent clauses with no connecting words.  
I am going home; I intend to stay there.
It rained heavily during the afternoon; we managed to have our picnic anyway.
They couldn't make it to the summit and back before dark; they decided to camp for the night.
2）You can also use a semicolon when you join two independent clauses together with one of the following conjunctive adverbs (adverbs that join independent clauses): however, moreover, therefore, consequently, otherwise, nevertheless, thus, etc.  
I am going home; moreover, I intend to stay there.
It rained heavily during the afternoon; however, we managed to have our picnic anyway.
They couldn't make it to the summit and back before dark; therefore, they decided to camp for the night.

Commas with Nonessential Elements
Rule: Use commas before and after nonessential words, phrases, and clauses, that is, elements embedded in the sentence that interrupt it without changing the essential meaning. If you leave out the element or put it somewhere else in the sentence, does the essential meaning of the sentence change? If so, the element is essential; if not, it is nonessential.
Nonessential: The average world temperature, however, has continued to rise significantly. (word)
Essential: The sixth-century philosopher Boethius was arrested, tortured, and bludgeoned to death. (word)
Nonessential: Company managers, seeking higher profits, hired temporary workers to replace full-time staff. (phrase) 该点写作时很实用
Essential: The person checking tickets at the counter asked for a form of identification. (phrase)
Nonessential: My uncle, who is eighty years old, walks three miles every day. (clause)
Essential: The woman who interviewed you is my sister. (clause)

Conquering the Comma Powerpoint Presentation
·placement in compound sentences
·placement after introductory elements
·placement with dependent phrases and clauses
·placement around nonessential elements
·placement in a series
·placement with adjectives

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Dangling Modifiers 垂悬修饰语

1 A dangling modifier is a word or phrase that modifies a word not clearly stated in the sentence. A modifier describes, clarifies, or gives more detail about a concept.
Having finished the assignment, Jill turned on the TV.
Incorrect usage: Having finished the assignment, the TV was turned on.

2 Strategies for revising dangling modifiers:
1) Name the appropriate or logical doer of the action as the subject of the main clause:
Incorrect: Having arrived late for practice, a written excuse was needed.
Correct: Having arrived late for practice, the team captain needed a written excuse.
2) Change the phrase that dangles into a complete introductory clause by naming the doer of the action in that clause:
Incorrect:Without knowing his name, it was difficult to introduce him.
Correct: Because Maria did not know his name, it was difficult to introduce him.
3) Combine the phrase and main clause into one:
Incorrect: To improve his results, the experiment was done again.
Correct: He improved his results by doing the experiment again.

3 More examples of dangling modifiers and their revisions:
Incorrect: After reading the original study, the article remains unconvincing.
Revised: After reading the original study, I find the article unconvincing.
Incorrect: Relieved of your responsibilities at your job, your home should be a place to relax.
Revised: Relieved of your responsibilities at your job, you should be able to relax at home.
Incorrect: The experiment was a failure, not having studied the lab manual carefully.
Revised: They failed the experiment, not having studied the lab manual carefully.

具体写作中很有用