[a习作temp] argument174 (高频）必认真回拍！ [复制链接]

yuchen
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发表于 2005-7-30 10:39:49 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

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Argument174
------题目------
The following recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff of Grove College, a private institution, to the college's governing committee.
'We recommend that Grove College preserve its century-old tradition of all-female education rather than admit men into its programs. It is true that a majority of faculty members voted in favor of coeducation, arguing that it would encourage more students to apply to Grove. But eighty percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted the school to remain all female, and over half of the alumni who answered a separate survey also opposed coeducation. Keeping the college all-female, therefore, will improve morale among students and convince alumni to keep supporting the college financially.'
------正文------
In the above argument, the author claims that in order to improve morale among students and convince alumni to keep supporting the college financially Grove College should preserve the tradition of all-female education. To justify the conclusion the author provides evidence based on two separate surveys in the students and alumni of Grove College. At first glance the argument seems plausible and logical. However it suffers from several flaws.

First of all, the author provides no evidence that the sample of the survey in students is statistically sufficient in size and representative of the general students in Grove College. The smaller the sample, the less reliable the author's conclusion. Moreover, If these female students are so shy or afraid to show their views which may be considered as dissatisfaction with their college, it is no surprising to see the fact that eighty percent of the respondents support all-female education. Without ruling out these possibilities, the author cannot rely on this survey to draw any conclusion about students' willingness.

In addition, it is unfair to claim that alumni want the school to remain all female only based on a separate survey. It is entirely possible that people who inclined to all female education were more willing to respond the survey than the others were. Therefore, we are not informed that this survey is reliable. Moreover, it is hasty to say that these alumni will not keep supporting the college financially although they cannot agree with coeducation. Or perhaps the alumni who usually donate amount of money to the college prefer coeducation to only female education. Without considering these possible scenarios, the author cannot convince me that the conclusion is reasonable.

Finally, the argument depends on the assumption that keeping the college all-female will improve morale. However the author does not provide any evidence to show that it is the case. Lacking the evidence about the correlation between all-female education and morale, it is impossible to say that the morale among students will be improved if the author recommendation is adopted.

To sum up, the argument is neither well reasoned nor persuasive. To make the notion more forceful, the author could present us more detailed information about whether the students really want to remain all female education and whether the alumni will not support the college as a result of coeducation. After all, the hasty conclusion will do no good to Grove College.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-30 at 13:24 ]

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发表于 2005-7-30 13:13:56 |只看该作者

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argument 174(高频）必认真回拍！

30min 401words
Argument174
------题目------
The following recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff of Grove College, a private institution, to the college's governing committee.
'We recommend that Grove College preserve its century-old tradition of all-female education rather than admit men into its programs. It is true that a majority of faculty members voted in favor of coeducation, arguing that it would encourage more students to apply to Grove. But eighty percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted the school to remain all female, and over half of the alumni who answered a separate survey also opposed coeducation. Keeping the college all-female, therefore, will improve morale among students and convince alumni to keep supporting the college financially.'
------正文------
In the above argument, the author claims that in order to improve morale among students and convince alumni to keep supporting the college financially Grove College should preserve the tradition of all-female education. To justify the conclusion the author provides evidence based on two separate surveys in the students and alumni of Grove College. At first glance the argument seems plausible and logical. However最好加个逗号 it suffers from several flaws.

First of all, the author provides no evidence that the sample of the survey in students is statistically sufficient in size and representative of the general students in Grove College. The smaller the sample, the less reliable the author's conclusion. Moreover, If these female students are so shy or afraid to show their views which may be considered as dissatisfaction with their college, it is no surprising to see the fact that eighty percent of the respondents support all-female education. Without ruling out these possibilities, the author cannot rely on this survey to draw any conclusion about students' willingness.还是要说清楚，首先是eighty percent of the students responding to a survey ，究竟有多少人多少比例的学生回应了，可能只是少数喜欢all-female education 的人所作的回应conducted by the student government，这也有问题啊，是否有权威性，可能学生对这样的调查是不屑一顾的，

In addition, it is unfair to claim that alumni want the school to remain all female only based on a separate survey. It is entirely possible that people who inclined to all female education were more willing to respond the survey than the others were. Therefore, we are not informed that this survey is reliable. 这里和前面的无关了吧，如果要说还是分段吧Moreover, it is hasty to say that these alumni will not keep supporting the college financially although they cannot agree with coeducation. Or perhaps the alumni who usually donate amount of money to the college prefer coeducation to only female education. Without considering these possible scenarios, the author cannot convince me that the conclusion is reasonable.

Finally, the argument depends on the assumption that keeping the college all-female will improve morale. However the author does not provide any evidence to show that it is the case. Lacking the evidence about the correlation between all-female education and morale, it is impossible to say that the morale among students will be improved if the author recommendation is adopted.这一段没能展开说清楚，为什么keeping the college all-female不会提高士气，可以这样写：Common sense tells me that when male and female students study together, it is more likely to improve the study efficiency. Moreover, perhaps, the students may feel disappointed due to the high expects of coeducation. On the other hand, since it has a century-old tradition of all-female education, it is entirely possible that a change can greatly improve the morale of the whole students.

To sum up, the argument is neither well reasoned nor persuasive. To make the notion more forceful, the author could present us more detailed information about whether the students really want to remain all female education and whether the alumni will not support the college as a result of coeducation. After all, the hasty conclusion will do no good to Grove College.

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