[a习作temp] Argument71 [Jet小组] 第六次作业 [复制链接]

sunneptune
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2008-2-15 00:10:57 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

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In this argument, the arguer concludes that the amount of electricity used by the copper-extraction industry to decline significantly due to the new copper-extracting technologies. To support the conclusion, the arguer points out the only way to extract pure copper form ore cost large amounts of electric energy. In addition, the arguer reasons that the new copper-extracting technologies require less electricity than the old method. As discussed below, the argument suffers from several critical flaws and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.

The argument lacks credibility because the author overlooks a possibility that whether the new copper-extracting technologies were applied widely. Perhaps in the incipient period of the marketing of the new technologies, a lot of troubles will stand in the way to success. The new technologies might have some obvious defects, such as the waste of water , lacks of stability or the cost of maintain and repair the new equipments is too high, which make the factory managers difficulty to accept them. Maybe there are not sufficient employees to manipulate these methods. Another proviso which impedes the popularization of the new method is that the reputation of this new process is not well enough to allure more factories to use it. In the statement, the arguer provides us no information about the popularity degree of this means. Lacking such evidences, the conclusion is wholly unconvincing.

Another problem that results in the misleading of this argument is that the assertion is based on a false contrast. The author claims that the old process to extract pure copper from ore requires large amounts of electric energy while the proportion of copper in the ore is low. But when the author mentions the new methods, he or she asserts the new copper-extracting technologies can use up to 40 percent less electricity than the order means to deal with the same amount or raw ore especially if the pro proportion of copper in the ore is high. The consuming of the amounts of electricity is compared based on different assumptions: one is in high copper proportion while another is low. Perhaps under the same circumstance, the new technologies cost equal or more amount electricity than the old ways. Without ruling out this factor, I can not reach an agreement with the author's opinion.

As it stands, the argument is not well reasoned. To make it logically acceptable, the arguer would have to demonstrate whether the new methods are popular enough. Additionally, the author must provide us the information that in the same situation the amounts of electric energy the two means cost.
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dreamstring
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沙发

发表于 2008-2-15 23:46:44 |只看该作者

In this argument, the arguer concludes that the amount of electricity used by the copper-extraction industry to decline(would decline 这句主语是amount of e) significantly due to the new copper-extracting technologies. To support the conclusion, the arguer points out the only way(不是only way吧？应该是the old way in extracting吧？) to extract pure copper form ore cost(costs) large amounts of electric energy. In addition, the arguer reasons that the new copper-extracting technologies require less electricity than the old method. As discussed below, the argument suffers from several critical flaws and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.

The argument lacks credibility because the author overlooks a possibility that whether(你说一种possibility就不能用whether了。一个“可能”不应该是能够用“是否”来说的，你仔细想想是不是) the new copper-extracting technologies were applied widely. Perhaps in the incipient period of the marketing of the new technologies, a lot of troubles will stand in the way to success. The new technologies might have some obvious defects, such as the waste of water , lacks of stability or the cost of maintain(maintaining) and repair the new equipments(the cost of the new equipments' repairment) is too high, which make the factory managers difficulty(difficult) to accept them. Maybe there are not(no) sufficient employees to manipulate these methods(方法应该是被运用，不是操纵). Another proviso which impedes the popularization of the new method is that the reputation of this new process is not well enough to allure more factories to use it. In the statement, the arguer provides us no information about the popularity degree of this means. Lacking such evidences(evidence), the conclusion is wholly unconvincing.

Another problem that results in the misleading of this argument is that the assertion is based on a false contrast. The author claims that the old process to extract pure copper from ore requires large amounts of electric energy while the proportion of copper in the ore is low. But when the author mentions the new methods, he or she asserts the new copper-extracting technologies can use up to 40 percent less electricity than the order means to deal with the same amount or raw ore especially if the pro proportion of copper in the ore is high. The consuming of the amounts of electricity is compared based on different assumptions: one is in high copper proportion while another is low. Perhaps under the same circumstance(在相同的情况下，有点chinglish的意思。你可以说in a certain circumstance然后用which 修饰是比例相同的情况就可以了), the new technologies cost equal or more amount electricity than the old ways. Without ruling out this factor, I can not reach an agreement with the author's opinion.

As it stands, the argument is not well reasoned. To make it logically acceptable, the arguer would have to demonstrate whether the new methods are popular enough. Additionally, the author must provide us the information that in the same situation the amounts of electric energy the two means cost.

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