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Both work and family play an important role(改成roles,an去掉) in an adult’s life. Then this raises a question: should we spend more time working or staying with family? A group of people claim that it is more important to spend moew time being with family to teach kids and look after parents. As far as I am concerned, however, working deserves more time especially when we are young and energetic. My reasons are as follows.
To begin with, it is no controversial that working helps people earn the bread for daily life. Admittedly, a person would spare some time accompanying his parents, yet he should pay more attention on(改成to吧) the job, which provides the material rewards for his daily life. I cannot imagine if one does not devote more time dealing with the task assigned by his boss, how can he get the money to pay rents, a car, a trip of family on holiday(用family outings好不好?), a new toy(复数toys,很多孩子~~) of his children? What is worse, if a man loses his job due to his constant absence from work, he would lose the security for himself as well as his family. So, it is definitely important to spend more time on the job to make a living.
Beside(besides), the reason why I am in favor of more time for working is because working gives people a sense of self-worth. A person, especially the youth who just started work, usually struggles hard in order to earn a sense of self-assurance from their(his) career. My sister, for example, just got the qualification for medical practice and turned into a doctor. She is always the first arriving at the patience’s’ ward and the last one leaving the hospital. Not only does she stay longer in the hospital, but also she focuses on the medical magazine or related paper to enrich herself at home. As a result, both the chief and the patience speak highly of her work, which makes her more confident and cheerful. Based (加上on)what I mentioned above, I am fully convinced that, more time for working is very significant to one’s self-assurance.,
To sum up, I strongly support the claim that it is more important to spend more time with(改成on) working. Since working provides people material rewards and gives them a sense of self-worth, it deserves more people’s time and attention.
感觉写得很流畅~~~要是能再加一个理由就好了,不过两个理由论证的很充分了。嘿嘿,本人写作不好,只能改改语法了,改完了不好意思阿~~~ |
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