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clearbaby
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2005-7-30 22:54:45 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户共用时间：51分13秒 418 words—588words
从2005年6月30日21时4分到2005年6月30日21时51分
------题目------
Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
------正文------
Determining whether education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student, different people have different answers due to different respective points of view. In my opinion, I disagree with what the author claims. The efficacy of education is decided by its valuable guidance for people, but not others.

On one hand, what kind of education is truly effective? For any country, education is seemed as the basis, which can influence the future of the nation. Thereby, the propose of education is to guide the students’ living attitudes to benefit direction, and make them living valuable and vary. So and so only, education can be called truly effective. Here we can cite Helen Keller as an example. Helen Keller suffered from a strange disease when she was only 19 months old, which made her completely blind and deaf. As for a normal person, everything would be hopeless. But a teacher named Anne Sullivan, who teached her to feel, to write and to speak. With the help of Anne, Helen created a miracle. She became a famous person, her book <if give me three seeing days> gained her the respect from people everywhere. The education from Anne not only teached Helen knowledge, but also made her more adamant and have the faith to contribute to the country. This is the real value of education. So the truly efficacy of education is not just as old man treat his grandchildren to meet their favorite, but as a pilot lightship in people's life to tell them how to live better.

On the other hand, if education only meets the individual needs and interests of each student, it is not sure that education will be truly valuable. For example, as for the young students, who have no ability to judge what is good or what is bad for them, often have their favorite things changed quickly. If as what said in the issue, education should change with students' fancies, it is possible that the students will learn nothing at last. There is a story about it. Many years ago, there was a wonder child in a city. His parents were afraid of the general education could not satisfy what he needed, so they decided to teach him alone. In the beginning, the child said that he likes painting, so the parents pleased a famous artist to teach him. But one week passed, the child said that he likes math more than painting. His parents retained a math scientist without hesitation. But after another week, the child’s favorite changed again. So and so, the wonder child learned nothing. In this case, meeting the individual needs and interests of students is not necessary the case.

Admittedly, education should be suitable for most students. However, the educator can use different methods on the basis of students' individual needs and interests. An eastern philosopher has even said (and I paraphrase) ' the ability of people is endless'. According, if education meets people's individual needs and interests, it is easier to discover people’s potential and they will learn the knowledge more pleasure, which can get twice the result with half the effort. Accordingly, we can speak that education is more effective.

In summary, the author's conclusion is unreasonable as what state above. The real value of education is to teach people how to live and how to contribute. Meeting the individual needs and interests of students is also a crosscut for education, thus not the whole.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-31 at 01:18 ]

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clearbaby
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沙发

发表于 2005-7-31 17:41:39 |只看该作者

再顶一下吧~~

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板凳

发表于 2005-7-31 19:40:06 |只看该作者

我来了
Determining whether education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student, different people have different answers due to different respectivedifferent 和respective 读起来有点罗索points of view. In my opinion, I disagree with what the author claims. The efficacy of education is decided by its valuable guidance for people, but not others.others 指的是什莫？

On one hand, what kind of education is truly effective? For any country, education is seemed as the basis, which can influence the future of the nation. Thereby, the propose of education is to guide the students’ living attitudes to benefitbeneficial direction, and make themtheir living valuable and varyvarious. 建议在首句或第二句就提出TSSo and so only, education can be called truly effective. Here we can cite Helen Keller as an example. Helen Keller suffered from a strange disease when she was only 19 months old, which made her completely blind and deaf. As for a normal person, everything would be hopeless. But a teacher named Anne Sullivan, who teached her to feel, to write and to speak. With the help of Anne, Helen created a miracle. She became a famous person, her book <if give me three seeing days> gained her the respect from people everywhere. The education from Anne not only teached Helen knowledge, but also made her more adamant and have the faith to contribute to the country. This is the real value of education. So the truly efficacy of education is not just as old man treat his grandchildren to meet their favorite, but as a pilot lightship灯塔是这样的翻译麽？ in people's life to tell them how to live better.这句话好；这段例子虽好，但论证的不是很深入

On the other hand, if education only meets the individual needs and interests of each student, it is not sure that education will be truly valuable. For example, as for the young students, who have no ability to judge what is good or what is bad for them, often have their favorite things changed quickly. If as what said in the issue, education should change with students' fancies, it is possible that the students will learn nothing at last. There is a story about it. Many years ago, there was a wonder child in a city. His parents were afraid ofthat the general education could not satisfy what he needed, so they decided to teach him alone. In the beginning, the child said that he likes painting, so the parents pleased a famous artist to teach him. But one week passed, the child said that he likes math more than painting. His parents retained a math scientist without hesitation. But after another week, the child’s favorite changed again. So and so, the wonder child learned nothing. In this case, meeting the individual needs and interests of students is not necessary the case.l2个case 有些混，可考虑改一下这段话的论证很不错，赞一个

Admittedly, education should be suitable for most students.此处可适当补充一下原因 However, the educator can use different methods on the basis of students' individual needs and interests.不懂为什莫用however，这两句话之间有点莫名其妙 An eastern philosopher has evenever said (and I paraphrase) ' the ability of people is endless'. According, if education meets people's individual needs and interests, it is easier to discover people’s potential and they will learn the knowledge more pleasure, which can get twice the result with half the effort. Accordingly, we can speak that education is more effective. 这段话的中心意思是什莫？感觉不是很明朗

In summary, the author's conclusion is unreasonable as what state被动 above. The real value of education is to teach people how to live and how to contribute. Meeting the individual needs and interests of students is also a crosscut for education, thus是不是该换成转折的词阿？是模板的话请指点 not the whole.
语言很好，论证有待深入欧上面拍得太重，不要介意哈~

[ Last edited by bnugirl on 2005-7-31 at 20:15 ]

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clearbaby
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地板

发表于 2005-7-31 20:30:19 |只看该作者

嘿嘿，当然不会啦，好象我的argu和issue的论证都是不太过关的

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5楼

发表于 2005-7-31 20:38:33 |只看该作者

pilot light是灯塔的意思，打错了... 用webster查过了
还有第三段里其实就一个例子，前面的for example去掉是不是好些，前面是论证
还有第四段，一般admittely都要用however回扣的，表示让步，其实全文是大负小正的写法，就是说虽然教育要面向大众，但可以以学生的兴趣爱好问出发点来引导，是不是我表达的不到位？
最后的thus不可以表示转折么？没用模版，感觉issue没有万能模版

嘿嘿~~

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