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[未归类] 紧急求助,请大家帮忙找找问题,如果考场这样写能有几分啊,谢谢 [复制链接]

hyjspmis
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电梯直达

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发表于 2007-4-5 13:17:38 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

TOPIC: ARGUMENT16 - The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper from a citizen of the state of Impecunia.

"Two years ago our neighboring state, Lucria, began a state lottery to supplement tax revenues for education and public health. Today, Lucria spends more per pupil than we do, and Lucria's public health program treats far more people than our state's program does. If we were to establish a state lottery like the one in Lucria, the profits could be used to improve our educational system and public health program. The new lottery would doubtless be successful, because a survey conducted in our capital city concludes that citizens of Impecunia already spend an average of $50 per person per year on gambling."
WORDS: 309 TIME: 0:30:00 DATE: 2007-3-28

The author hastily assumes that if they establish a state lottery, the profits can improve the conditions in education and public health program, on the basis that Lucia spends more per pupil and treats more people after they began a state lottery. Besides, the author projects that the new lottery would be successful resulting from a survey, which shows that citizens of Impecunia already spend a large amount of money on gambling. Further, the author makes a conclusion that they should establish a state lottery. Yet, in my view, this argument is well organized and presented, not well-reasoned in some aspects.

Firstly, while a high correlation between lottery and the profits spent on education and health program is strong evidence of causal relation, it is actually insufficient. Maybe the money provided by government in education in Lucia is much more than that in Impecunia. And it is entirely possible that the patients in Lucria are more than that in Impecunia. Accordingly, lacking clearer evidence in the exact profit spent on education and health program, I cannot fully accept the assumption that lottery contributes to the improvement on education and health program.

Secondly, even if the lottery in Lucria had good effect on education and health program, it is unconvincing that the lottery in Impecunia can have the same effect. Because no evidence is given in the argument to demonstrate that the two areas have the same social environment and hobbies of the residents. The possibility is that the improvement is not apparent even if the profit on education and health program.

Thirdly, the assumption--the new lottery would undoubtedly be successful based on the survey conducted in capital city is unjustifiable. First of all, the respondents in capital city are not representative of overall population in Impecunia. In addition, without more information about the respondents’ occupations, sexual proportion, and whether it is conducted scientifically, I cannot fully accept the results of the survey. It is entirely possible that the individuals inclined to gamble are more willing to respond to the survey than other people. And the most important of all, lottery is only one part of the gambling. Lacking no sufficient evidence, I cannot rule out the possibility that the respondents spend the majority of $50 on other gambling activities--almost little money on lottery. Therefore, the assumption, which depend on the survey, that the new lottery would success is unjustifiable. More evidence are needed to support this assumption.

To sum up, the argument is indeed illogical in some respects. More information about the interest of residents in Impecunia in lottery should be provided. What is more, more evidence in reference to the relation between lottery and more profits to spend on education and health program are needed to support the conclusion.
谢谢大家:)

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bangbang1982
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沙发

发表于 2007-4-5 14:41:28 |只看该作者

写得太少了点吧，帮你顶一下

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hyjspmis
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板凳

发表于 2007-4-5 15:57:56 |只看该作者

这篇文章后来改过不止那个数,当时打字慢没写完
十一号考了,很急,请大家帮忙指下错误
谢谢

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bangbang1982
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地板

发表于 2007-4-5 16:39:08 |只看该作者

十一号？哪里考？我也十一号呢，不过路途遥远，要提前两天走，所以比你时间还紧张

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hyjspmis
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5楼

发表于 2007-4-5 16:40:38 |只看该作者

我照一位G友的意见修改了一下,希望大家能多帮我狠狠拍以下,非常感谢:) :handshake
TOPIC: ARGUMENT16 - The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper from a citizen of the state of Impecunia.

"Two years ago our neighboring state, Lucria, began a state lottery to supplement tax revenues for education and public health. Today, Lucria spends more per pupil than we do, and Lucria's public health program treats far more people than our state's program does. If we were to establish a state lottery like the one in Lucria, the profits could be used to improve our educational system and public health program. The new lottery would doubtless be successful, because a survey conducted in our capital city concludes that citizens of Impecunia already spend an average of $50 per person per year on gambling."
WORDS: 309 TIME: 0:30:00 DATE: 2007-3-28
The author hastily assumes that by establishing a state lottery, the profits can improve the conditions in education and public health program. Besides, the author projects that the new lottery would be successful resulting from the survey in capital city of Impecunia. Further, the author makes a conclusion that they should establish a state lottery. Yet, in my view, this argument is well organized, but not well-reasoned in some aspects.

Firstly, while a high correlation between lottery and the profits spent on education and health program is powerful evidence of causal relation, it is actually insufficient. Maybe the money provided by government in education in Lucia is much more than that in Impecunia. And it is entirely possible that the patients in Lucria are more than that in Impecunia. What is more, perhaps the environment there was polluted that more and more people had illness which should see a doctor in public hospitals. Or perhaps, the level of public health system has been improved by employing many experts in different areas, which attracts more people to treat there. Accordingly, lacking clearer evidence in the exact profit spent on education and health program, I cannot fully accept the assumption that lottery contributes to the improvement on education and health program.

Secondly, even if the lottery in Lucria had good effect on education and health program, it is unconvincing that the lottery in Impecunia can have the same effect. Because no evidence is given in the argument to demonstrate that the two areas have the same social environment and hobbies of the residents. It is entirely possible that the residents do not spend much on lottery. In addition, the government of Impecunia may not profit from lottery to advance the conditions in education and health programs. And perhaps the improvement is not apparent even if the profit on education and health program. Without ruling out these possibilities, the author cannot convince me that there will be a success in lottery in Impecunia.

Thirdly, the assumption--the new lottery would undoubtedly be successful based on the survey conducted in capital city is unjustifiable. First of all, the respondents in capital city are not representative of overall population in Impecunia. In addition, without more information about the respondents’ occupations, sexual proportion, and whether it is conducted scientifically, I cannot fully accept the results of the survey. It is entirely possible that the individuals inclined to gamble are more willing to respond to the survey than other people. And the most important of all, lottery is only one part of the gambling. Lacking no sufficient evidence, I cannot rule out the possibility that the respondents spend the majority of $50 on other gambling activities--almost little money on lottery. Therefore, the assumption, which depend on the survey, that the new lottery would success is unjustifiable. More evidence is needed to support this assumption.

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hyjspmis
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6楼

发表于 2007-4-5 16:42:33 |只看该作者

呵呵刚才粘贴掉了结尾,现在补上,谢谢

To sum up, the argument is indeed illogical in some respects. more evidence about the relation between lottery and profits to spend on education and health program is needed to support the conclusion.

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