[i习作temp] Issue130 【0906G 文以载道三月四月小组】2.8作业 by NormalFuJen [复制链接]

NormalFuJen
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2009-2-9 00:47:44 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Issue 130
"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have
not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."

提纲：
态度：以反对为主
1：小孩的社会化程度是对社会有很大影响
2：但是社会化程度并不完全决定社会命运
3：我们已经掌握到如何培养小孩的方法

According to the speaker, the destiny of our society depends on how or children are socialized while we have not yet learned how to raise our children for a better society. I concede that the extent our children are socialized does have something to do with the development of our society. However, the assertions that how our children are socialized would determine the destiny of society and that we have not learned how to raise children are both poorly supported by empirical evidence.

First of all, I concede that the extent how children are socialized does affects the development of society. To witness healthy socialization in action, one needs look no further than Mr. Obama, the new President of U.S. As a teenager, he lived in Indonesia for several years and then moved to America. As an active child, he soon got on well with the local children and became popular no matter where he moved. Thanks to the wonderful childhood, Obama learned a lot from children around and that helps him how to get along well with friends and even enemies, and eventually he succeeds. Hitler has had a miserable childhood, when he did not get enough love from his parents and became dissocial or even anti-social. That shadow makes his psychological state abnormal, and eventually contributes to his cruel character, which relates to his decision to start the disastrous war, the World War II. In short, how children are socialized does relates to the destiny of society to some extent.

However, socialization is only one factor influencing the extent to which an individual will ultimately contribute to a better society. Perhaps there are other more important factors than socialization. Consider certain prominent scientists who have contribute greatly to a better society. Watt's contributions in inventing steam engine sprang primarily from the strong will that he believed that he would succeed. Having experienced a lot of fails, he finally succeeds in developing the first steam engine in the world with his unremitting efforts. Watson and Creek's contribution in finding the structure of DNA was primarily the result of their hard work and concentration in the research field. An even more remarkable example was Bill Gate, who set up the Microsoft Company which makes our daily work easy and comfortable by developing a series of software such as Windows and Office. The main reason for his success was his bright sight in business career and great courage. In a word, there are other factors, perhaps more important than socialization, that affect the destiny of society.

Another reason for my disagreement with the speaker is that we have already learned how to raise children to bring about a better society. In the past fifty years, we have learned to be tolerant of different viewpoints and people who are different from ourselves. We taught our children to be compromising and respect others. In this way, most children all over the world learned to be tolerant and compromising. Children now are also taught to be peace-loving. Having experienced the pain of the Second World War, it is a consensus that we do not need war any more. Children are also taught to be respectful of rights of women and various racial groups. They became aware of that people are born equally. Moreover, most children become aware of the importance of cooperation, which will help them to get along well with people around and contribute more to the society. In my view of point, the speaker's second claim flies in the face of the evidence above.

In sum, when it comes to whether children grow up to contribute to a better society, the key determinants are not only socialization but also strong will, great courage as well as bright sight. And in my view, we have already handled the right way to raise children to bring a better society.

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沙发

发表于 2009-2-10 12:47:44 |只看该作者

According to the speaker, the destiny of our society depends on how our children are socialized while we have not yet learned how to raise our children for a better society. I concede that the extent our children are socialized does have something to do with the development of our society. However, the assertions that how our children are socialized would determine the destiny of society and that we have not learned how to raise children are both poorly supported by empirical evidence.

First of all, I concede that the extent how children are socialized does affects the development of society. To witness healthy socialization in action, one needs look no further than Mr. Obama, the new President of U.S. As a teenager, he lived in Indonesia for several years and then moved to America. As an active child, he soon got on well with the local children and became popular no matter where he moved. Thanks to the wonderful childhood, Obama learned a lot from children around and that helps him how to get along well with friends and even enemies, and eventually he succeeds. Hitler has had a miserable childhood, when he did not get enough love from his parents and became dissocial or even anti-social. That shadow makes his psychological state abnormal, and eventually contributes to his cruel character, which relates to his decision to start the disastrous war, the World War II. In short, how children are socialized does relates to the destiny of society to some extent.(两个很好的例子，正反对比，两个政治家都对社会产生了很大的影响)

However, socialization is only one factor influencing the extent to which an individual will ultimately contribute to a better society. Perhaps there are other more important factors than socialization. Consider certain prominent scientists who have contribute greatly to a better society. What's contributions in inventing steam engine sprang primarily from the strong will that he believed that he would succeed(sping from 用的很好，但是整个句型不是很地道，可能我没见过). Having experienced a lot of fails, he finally succeeds in developing the first steam engine in the world with his unremitting efforts. Watson and Creek's contribution in finding the structure of DNA was primarily the result of their hard work and concentration in the research field. An even more remarkable example was Bill Gates, who set up the Microsoft Company which makes our daily work easy and comfortable by developing a series of software such as Windows and Office. The main reason for his success was his bright sight in business career and great courage. In a word, there are other factors, perhaps more important than socialization, that affect the destiny of society.

Another reason for my disagreement with the speaker is that we have already learned how to raise children to bring about a better society. In the past fifty years, we have learned to be tolerant of different viewpoints and people who are different from ourselves. We taught our children to be compromising and respect others. In this way, most children all over the world learned to be tolerant and compromising. Children now are also taught to be peace-loving. Having experienced the pain of the Second World War, it is a consensus that we do not need war any more. Children are also taught to be respectful of rights of women and various racial groups. They became aware of that people are born equally. Moreover, most children become aware of the importance of cooperation, which will help them to get along well with people around and contribute more to the society. In my view of point, the speaker's second claim flies in the face of the evidence above.（The resoning is a little bit unconvincing and presumptuous, also lacks evidence.）

In sum, when it comes to whether children grow up to contribute to a better society, the key determinants are not only socialization but also strong will, great courage as well as bright sight. And in my view, we have already handled the right way to raise children to bring a better society.

总的来说，这篇文章思路很清晰，三段论，前两段论证完美，但第三段略显苍白，现在的教育到底怎样，是不是你主观说的那样，读者也很怀疑，如果能用一些例子，比如对孔子学说仁、礼、和等的推崇会更好些。

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NormalFuJen
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板凳

发表于 2009-2-11 02:03:32 |只看该作者

Issue130 【0906G 文以载道三月四月小组】2.8作业 Thanks to luyaoxu

According to the speaker, the destiny of our society depends on how our children are socialized while we have not yet learned how to raise our children for a better society. I concede that the extent our children are socialized does have something to do with the development of our society. However, the assertions that how our children are socialized would determine the destiny of society and that we have not learned how to raise children are both poorly supported by empirical evidence.

First of all, I concede that the extent how our children are socialized does affect the development of society. To witness healthy socialization in action, one needs look no further than Mr. Obama, the new President of the United States. As a teenager, he lived in Indonesia for several years and then moved to America. As an active child, he soon got on well with the local children and became popular no matter where he moved. Thanks to the wonderful childhood, Obama learned a lot from children around and that helps him how to get along well with friends and even enemies, and eventually he succeeds. Adolph, the Germany Nazi leader during the 1930s and 1940s, had a miserable childhood, when he did not get enough love from his parents and became dissocial or even anti-social. That shadow makes his psychological state abnormal, and eventually contributes to his cruel character, which relates to his decision to start the disastrous war, the World War II. In short, how children are socialized does relates to the destiny of society to some extent

However, socialization is only one factor influencing the extent to which an individual will ultimately contribute to a better society. Perhaps there are other more important factors than socialization. Consider certain prominent scientists who have contribute greatly to a better society. James Watt's contributions in inventing steam engine sprang primarily from the strong will that he believed that he would succeed. Having experienced a lot of failures, he finally succeeds in developing the first steam engine in the world with his unremitting efforts. James Dewey Watson and Francis Creek's contribution in finding the structure of DNA was primarily the result of their hard work and concentration in the research field. An even more remarkable example was Bill Gates, who set up the Microsoft Company which makes our daily work easy and comfortable by developing a series of software such as Windows and Office. The main reason for his success was his and great courage and innovation. In a word, there are other factors, perhaps more important than socialization, that affect the destiny of society.

Finally, in my view of point, we have already to find the right way to raise our children for a better society: being creative and cooperative. We have noticed the importance of creative thinking since hundred year ago, through which we have cultured hundreds of innovative scientists. It is through creative thinking of keeping suspicious to the old theory God create the world that Charles Robert Darwin develop the theory of evolution, which attribute great to the development of biology. We also have learned to teach children to be cooperative as the power of individual is limited while through the cooperation of team work one can get great success. Recognizing the importance of collaboration, Sam Walton, the founder of WAL-MART, learnt to ask for help from his colleagues when he faced difficulties he could not solve. With the help of numerous colleagues, he finally found WAL-MART and developed it into the largest enterprises in the world. In short, we have already found the correct way, instructing them to be creative and cooperative, to educate our children.

In sum, when it comes to whether children grow up to contribute to a better society, the key determinants are not only socialization but also strong will, great courage as well as bright sight. And in my view, we have already handled the right way to raise children to bring a better society.

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