[a习作temp] Argument74 Issue112 [YB-1]7月14日作业 by3071001007 [复制链接]

3071001007
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电梯直达

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发表于 2009-7-14 12:59:07 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 3071001007 于 2009-7-14 18:00 编辑

每回都是先写完再总结提纲。。。是不是顺序有点反了啊
第一段不用多说，回顾一下作者的观点，指出推理有问题
第二段对调查结论的客观性提出质疑。指出仅仅靠志愿者的报告是不够的，有时心理暗示作用会影响一个人的判断能力。建议通过一些客观的方法证明皮肤的改善
第三段让步假设结论没有问题。进一步指出调查本身存在方法上的问题。我们不能判断是中性肥皂还是洗面奶对志愿者有帮助，因为志愿者的情况我们不了解，很有可能很多志愿者之前不用中性肥皂。
第四段进一步指出皮肤有很多类型，一种洗面奶适用于所有类型的皮肤是不太可能的。鉴于我们不知道志愿者的皮肤情况，作者的论断显然是缺少说服力的。
第五段总结提出意见

这里有个尝试，就是没有按照通常的逻辑顺序来写，帮我改的同学不妨注意一下，写作顺序和逻辑上肯定和你有不同，麻烦你帮我看看这样的尝试是抓住了重点，还是失去了逻辑性。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT76 - The following appeared as part of an article in a health and beauty magazine.

"A group of volunteers participated in a study of consumer responses to the new Luxess face cream. Every morning for a month, they washed their faces with mild soap and then applied Luxess. At the end of that month, most volunteers reported a marked improvement in the way their skin looked and felt. Thus it appears that Luxess is truly effective in improving the condition of facial skin."
WORDS: 429
TIME: 01:00:00
DATE: 2009/7/14 12:43:23

Recently, a study is conducted to study about the effect of a new Luxess face cream. Based on the evaluation of the volunteers in the study for one month, the author suggests that the new face cream is truly helpful to improve the condition of users' facial skin. Although the argument looks reasonable, but it can still reveal many flaws after a careful consideration.

First of all, the author judges the effect only related to the volunteers' reports. There is no other scientific evidence to support the conclusion. We all know that the psychological suggestion can affect one's feeling a lot, so the highly evaluation of the new face cream is quite possible be the result of the psychological suggestion that the cream will be helpful to our skin by the volunteers. In this way, we can't judge the question simply by volunteers' words. It will be better to give some tests of the volunteers' facial skin and so that we can get an objective evaluation of the situation.

Moreover, let's suppose that the conclusion has no error. The argument is based on a experiment, which is considered correct. But the fact is that there exist many flaws in the research. All the volunteers washed their face not only with the new face cream, but mild soap as well every morning. It's hard to say that the improvement is contributed to the face cream, because we don't know anything about the volunteers. Someone may used to use the mild soap, but others may not. Under the situation of lacking clearly evidence, we can't tell whether it is the cream which helps for those who don't use mild soap.

Further more, there are not only one type of facial skin for all the people, as we all know that some people have a dry skin while others may be oily. It's almost impossible for a product's application to cover all types of skin. Since we don't know anything about the type of facial skin of the volunteers, the author's argument obviously lack of persuasion.

In sum, the author makes some mistakes in the process of argument which render it logically unpersuasive. To persuade me to believe the author's claim, I advise that the author give more evidences to indicate that the new face cream is helpful to consumers' facial skin, and it will be even better to give a particular conclusion about which type of skin suits the cream most. Only in this way, can the argument be more acceptable and may even lead to a good sales performance.

arguement, Issue, 作业

[a习作temp] Argument74 Issue112 [YB-1]7月14日作业 by3071001007 [复制链接]

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