【草莓酱拌饭组】1Issue7[re返修 2楼again] by 爪子

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

第三段和第四段：

What’s more, even we leading a modern life, the previous plots could be spelled in a lively and visual way through video recording, whose sounds and images have indicated the advent of a time when silence is betrayal. Released in cinemas worldwide, a movie, “Atonement”, based on Ian McEwan’s novel, contains a continuous shot of Allied troops stranded on the beach of Dunkirk waiting to be evacuated. This video record has successfully led us into the feelings that as if we were the solders in the evacuation, queuing in the water and waiting shoulder-deep {位置错了} for hours with anxiety. Additionally, their persistence has told us that just as constant sacrifice is the price {可以考虑at the cost/price of} of victory in a war, so {另起一句So} is eternal solidarity the price of ultimate success in an evacuation. Such a firm belief was featured evidently through the solders’ eyes and words.

However, a video record sometimes is likely to quote out of a context {？} without a historic and literal documentation qualified as a deep reflection and enlightment for a history event. An elementary knowledge of it is insufficient to enable the readers to avoid misinterpreting related video records. A scene in the film, that the whole root and brain of the British Army had been stranded at Dunkirk and seemed to be captured, will impress people as the evacuation is a colossal military disaster and mislead them not into assigning this deliverance the attributes of a victory. Literally, this evacuation came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of disasters in Ian McEwan’s novel, whose vivid written plots with clear perception witnessed a disaster ultimately turning into triumph, and whose descriptive words also underline {前后时态不对应} the firm belief -- the "Dunkirk Spirit", standing for the solidarity in times of adversity, which is still heard in Britain today.

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

第一段那个不是responding，是response。。。

inferiority用在这里不合适，不是单复数问题~

NaperyUID: 2710990

What’s more, even we are leading a modern life, the previous plots could be reproduced in a lively and visual way through a video record, whose sounds and images have indicated the emergency/coming of a time when “silence” demands betrayal. Released in cinemas worldwide, a movie called “Atonement”, based on Ian McEwan’s novel, contains a continuous shot of Allied troops stranded on the beach of Dunkirk waiting to be evacuated. This video record has successfully led us into the feelings that as if we were the soldiers in the evacuation, queuing in the water and waiting deep-shoulder for hours with anxiety. Besides, their persistence has already told us that just as constant sacrifice is the price of victory in a war, so is eternal solidarity the price of ultimate success in an evacuation. Such is a firm belief that was featured evidently through the soldiers’ eyes and words in the video.

even we leading a modern life 这里我想用个独立主格 是不是不合适？

spell 我想用个形象的说法 不过看来貌似不行。。。

video recording  这里我后来觉得还是用a video record好了 因为后面用的是whose 这样可能贴切一点

貌似advent后面用一个具体的词会好一些 例如spring之类的

把is 改成demands 我觉得这样可能会更形象店 来强调对video技术的需要

deep-shoulder 囧 直接copy资料的偷懒作法果真可耻！

soldiers  单词拼写错误，为啥WORD没显示出来？？？ 囧

我这里是想把just as 和后面的as构成一个大概类似于类比的句子，这样考虑的话是不是句子太长了？

正如战争胜利的代价是不停的牺牲，撤退成功的代价是团结统一~~~

NaperyUID: 2710990

第一段那个不是responding，是response。。。

inferiority用在这里不合适，不是单复数问题~
cinderella1016 发表于 2009-11-10 16:06

囧。。。

通宵一晚 没睡好 果真迟钝了 嘿嘿

阿刘 我是想表达一个不重要 或者说次之的观点 ，怎么说比较恰当呢？

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

of secondary importance?

A is subordinate to B.(A比B次要)~

NaperyUID: 2710990

of secondary importance?

A is subordinate to B.(A比B次要)~
cinderella1016 发表于 2009-11-10 16:14

soga~~

inferiority是不是贬义过重了啊？

也想过secondary improtance，但想着说能不能找一个单词代替~~~

subordination  我竟然忘记这个词了。。。汗。。。。

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

第五段：

Born as the fruits of repeatedly rethinking and refining, written records genuinely have conveyed the authors’ inner thoughts as well. In the book “History of the Second World War” written by Kurt Tippelskirch {名字中少一个von}, a Nazi general of Germany, lies his affirmations of Dunkirk Evacuation as he wrote: it is absolutely well-reasoned for their pride for what they have achieved {有check过原文咩？}. The mission, informing audience of an executioner’s praise {？}, which these words call for, will fail to be written down only by a video of battlefield filled with heavy fire. And, it was just in the presentation of Willy Brandt for The Nobel Peace Prize Lecture in 1971 that pronounced the peace-loving intentions of the whole Germany {缺成分}. Nor does the charm of a video record about this lecture simply move without what is expressed in the literal scenarios, such as a matter of his will, vigor of his emotion, or even the his deliberations on the value of a society.

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

后两段看得云里雾里~~

撤先~~~

NaperyUID: 2710990

However, a video record sometimes is likely to quote out of a context {？} without a historic and literal documentation qualified as a deep reflection and enlightment for a history event. An elementary knowledge of it is insufficient to enable the readers to avoid misinterpreting related video records. A scene in the film, that the whole root and brain of the British Army had been stranded at Dunkirk and seemed to be captured, will impress people as the evacuation is a colossal military disaster and mislead them not into assigning this deliverance the attributes of a victory. Literally, this evacuation came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of disasters in Ian McEwan’s novel, whose vivid written plots with clear perception witnessed a disaster ultimately turning into triumph, and whose descriptive words also underline {前后时态不对应} the firm belief -- the "Dunkirk Spirit", standing for the solidarity in times of adversity, which is still heard in Britain today.

However, a video record sometimes is likely to quote out of a historical event without a historic and literal documentation referred to as deep reflection and enlightment for it. An elementary knowledge of it is insufficient to enable the readers to avoid misinterpreting related video records. A scene in the film, that the whole core of the British Army had been stranded at Dunkirk and seemed captive, will impress people as the evacuation is a colossal military disaster and mislead them into not assigning this evacuation the attributes of a victory. Literally, this evacuation came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of disasters in Ian McEwan’s novel, whose vivid written plots with clear perception witnessed that a disaster ultimately turned into triumph, and whose descriptive words also underlined the firm belief -- the "Dunkirk Spirit", standing for the solidarity in times of adversity, which is still universal in Britain today.



deliverance 恩 我想了想 解脱 解救 貌似本省就是说已经带有成功的性质的 是不是这么理解？

红色对应着为修改的地方~~

NaperyUID: 2710990

后两段看得云里雾里~~

撤先~~~
cinderella1016 发表于 2009-11-10 16:33

后两段 我写的时候 也觉得貌似升华过了头~~

那个原文 我找不到 么有办法check  只有按中文自己翻译下了~~

等我再琢磨一下后面两段~~~

NaperyUID: 2710990

Born as the fruits of repeatedly rethinking and refining, written records genuinely have conveyed the authors’ inner thoughts as well. In the book “History of the Second World War” written by Kurt Tippelskirch {名字中少一个von}, a Nazi general of Germany, lies his affirmations of Dunkirk Evacuation as he wrote: it is absolutely well-reasoned for their pride for what they have achieved {有check过原文咩？}. The mission, informing audience of an executioner’s praise {？}, which these words call for, will fail to be written down only by a video of battlefield filled with heavy fire. And, it was just in the presentation of Willy Brandt for The Nobel Peace Prize Lecture in 1971 that pronounced the peace-loving intentions of the whole Germany {缺成分}. Nor does the charm of a video record about this lecture simply move without what is expressed in the literal scenarios, such as a matter of his will, vigor of his emotion, or even the his deliberations on the value of a society.

Born as the fruits of repeatedly rethinking and refining by authors, written records genuinely have conveyed the authors’ inner thoughts as well. A book “History of the Second World War” written by Kurt Von Tippelskirch, a Nazi general of Germany, shows the author’s affirmations of Dunkirk Evacuation, as he wrote: it is absolutely well-reasoned for their pride for what they have achieved. The mission, informing the audience of a Nazi's praise, which these words call for, will fail to be written down only by a video of battlefield filled with heavy fire. And, it was just the presentation of Willy Brandt for The Nobel Peace Prize Lecture in 1971 that pronounced the peace-loving intentions of the whole Germany. Nor does the charm of a video record about this lecture simply move without what is expressed in the literal scenarios, such as a matter of his will, vigor of his emotion, or even the his deliberations on the value of a society.

加上一个by authors，会不会好点？

Von[这里某爪为了省事，就把VON给删了，阿刘真是厉害。。。。]

as he wrote: it is absolutely well-reasoned for their pride for what they have achieved.  自己按照中文翻译的 找不到英文 怎么办？

only是想说 仅仅靠这一种方法是不行的。。。

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

那个von是小写的，用于人命前，表示贵族，音译为“冯”~~

NaperyUID: 2710990

那个von是小写的，用于人命前，表示贵族，音译为“冯”~~
cinderella1016 发表于 2009-11-10 16:51

soga~~~

话说 这句原话 我用尽我所知道的google方法 都还是找不到。。。

阿刘你有读过么？

cinderella1016UID: 2666652

そうか是男人说的， そうですね是女人说的……

方法嘛，你在中译本里标好那句话的位置，在GOOGLE BOOK里面找英文版，然后按图索骥~~其他办法我也想不到~

NaperyUID: 2710990

そうか是男人说的， そうですね是女人说的……

方法嘛，你在中译本里标好那句话的位置，在GOOGLE BOOK里面找英文版，然后按图索骥~~其他办法我也想不到~
cinderella1016 发表于 2009-11-10 17:01

没事，某爪男女不分。。。。

啊 ，我试试好了，如果找不到的话，自己写的话，会不会有影响？