1006G[REBORN FROM THE ASHES组]备考日记 by 木虫虫--不积跬步，无以致千里

木虫虫UID: 2694986

翻译An Introduction to the Analytical Writing Section of the GRE General Test


GRE写作介绍中篇


样题举例
“In our time, specialists of all kinds are highly overrated. We need more generalists—people who can provide broad perspectives."

解题策略
这个陈述提出了几个相互关联的问题：
什么是通才和专才？
他们对社会的贡献是什么？
社会真的需要更多通才吗？
专才确实被“高估”了吗？

你可以采取以下基本立场：是的，社会需要更多通才，专才被高估了。不对，恰恰相反。或者，依情况而定。或者，二者在今天的文化中都很重要，都没被高估。你的分析可以从某一特定领域、多个领域或各种情况中选取事例。你可以聚焦于通才和专才在通信、交通、政治、信息或技术领域中所扮演的角色。只要你能运用相关理由和事例支持自己的观点，上述各种方式都没有问题。

在你选定立场之前，花点时间重读题目，提出以下问题以助分析：

·专才和通才的区别是什么？他们各自的长处是什么？
·这种区别在各个职业和情况都存在吗？是否有可能有时一个专才也需要有非常广泛的知识和能力才能做好工作？
·在你的领域里，专才和通才是怎么工作的？
·你觉得社会对专才和通才的评价如何？是否专才在某些情况被高估，另一些情况没有？
·社会真的需要比现在更多的通才么？若是，他们对社会有什么用？

现在你可以把思路归为两类：
支持题给陈述的理由和事例；
反对题给陈述的理由和事例。

若发现其中一个明显比另一个好写，就从这一方面入手。组织论证时，记住另一方的观点以辩驳它。
若两方观点都很有说服力，就构想一个与题给条件不同，而更受限或更复杂的情况。随后你可以采用双方的理由和事例论证自己的观点。

答卷举例与阅卷人点评

6分答卷
In this era of rapid social and technological change leading to increasing life complexity and psychological displacement, both positive and negative effects among persons in Western society call for a balance in which there are both specialists and generalists.

Specialists are necessary in order to allow society as a whole to properly and usefully assimilate the masses of new information and knowledge that have come out of research and have been widely disseminated through mass global media. As the head of Pharmacology at my university once said (and I paraphrase):"I can only research what I do because there are so many who have come before me to whom I can turn for basic knowledge. It is only because of each of the narrowly focussed individuals at each step that a full and true understanding of the complexities of life can be had. Each person can only hold enough knowledge to add one small rung to the ladder, but together we can climb to the moon." This illustrates the point that our societies level of knowledge and technology is at a stage in which there simply must be specialists in order for our society to take advantage of the information available to us.

Simply put, without specialists, our society would find itself bogged down in the Sargasso sea of information overload. While it was fine for early physicists to learn and understand the few laws and ideas that existed during their times, now, no one individual can possibly digest and assimilate all of the knowledge in any given area.

On the other hand, Over specialization means narrow focii in which people can lose the larger picture.No one can hope to understand the human body by only inspecting one's own toe-nails. What we learn from a narrow focus may be internally logically coherent but may be irrelevant or fallacious within the framework of a broader perspective. Further, if we inspect only our toe-nails, we may conclude that the whole body is hard and white. Useful conclusions and thus perhaps useful inventions must come by sharing among specialists. Simply throwing out various discovieries means we have a pile of useless discoveries, it is only when one can make with them a mosaic that we can see that they may form a picture.

Not only may over-specialization be dangerous in terms of the truth, purity and cohesion of knowledge, but it can also serve to drown moral or universall issues. Generalists and only generalists can see a broad enough picture to realize and introduce to the world the problems of the environment. With specialization, each person focusses on their research and their goals. Thus, industrialization, expansion, and new technologies are driven ahead. Meanwhile no individual can see the wholisitc view of our global existence in which true advancement may mean stifling individual specialists for the greater good of all.

Finally, over-specialization in a people's daily lives and jobs has meant personal and psychological compartmentalization. People are forced into pigeon holes early in life (at least by university) and must conciously attempt to consume external forms of stimuli and information in order not to be lost in their small and isolated universe. Not only does this make for narrowly focussed and generally pooprly-educated individuals, but it guarantees a sense of loss of community, often followed by a feeling of psychological displacement and personal dissatisfaction.

Without generalists, society becomes inward-looking and eventually inefficient. Without a society that recongnizes the impotance of braod-mindedness and fora for sharing generalities, individuals become isolated. Thus, while our form of society necessitates specialists, generalists are equally important. Specialists drive us forward in a series of thrusts while generalists make sure we are still on the jousting field and know what the stakes are.

阅卷人评点——6分

这是一篇相当出众的话题分析——有深刻见解、理由充分、高效的语言运用。引入段指出了作者的立场，并且引出了作者即将展开论述的情境："In this era of rapid social and technological change leading to increasing life complexity and psychological displacement . . . ."

论证本身分两个部分。第一部分给出了关于专才的有说服力的例子，主要在医学领域。第二部分给出了同样有说服力、结构严整的事例以辩驳过于单一，其三个主要分论点是：
·逻辑方面（受训单一的专家们常不能着眼全局）
·道德方面（通才们常常能够理解获得‘大局的利益’需要哪些因素）
·个人方面（过早地专门化/类别化可能导致心理伤害）

通过灵巧的运用专家证词(quotation from a prominent medical researcher)，以及生动的比喻(to inspect only one's toenails is to ignore the whole body)加强了论证的严谨的推理路线。

并不是让这篇文章出色的唯一理由。文章的语言精确而形象("bogged down in a Sargasso sea of information overload," "a pile of useless discoveries," and "specialists drive us forward in a series of thrusts, while generalists make sure we are still on the jousting field") 读者不是被过渡性短语和观点指引，沿着文章摸清其思维结构前行。这是一篇对该话题的杰出答卷。

5分答卷

Specialists are not overrated today. More generalists may be needed, but not to overshadow the specialists. Generalists can provide a great deal of information on many topics of interest with a broad range of ideas. People who look at the overall view of things can help with some of the large problems our society faces today. But specialists are necessary to gain a better understanding of more in depth methods to solve problems or fixing things.

One good example of why specialists are not overrated is in the medical field. Doctors are necessary for people to live healthy lives. When a person is sick, he may go to a general practitioner to find out the cause of his problems. Usually, this kind of "generalized" doctor can help most ailments with simple and effective treatments. Sometimes, though, a sickness may go beyond a family doctor's knowledge or the prescribed treatments don't work the way they should. When a sickness progresses or becomes diagnosed as a disease that requires more care than a family doctor can provide, he may be referred to a specialist. For instance, a person with constant breathing problems that require hospitalization may be suggested to visit an asthma specialist. Since a family doctor has a great deal of knowledge of medicine, he can decide when his methods are not effective and the patient needs to see someone who knows more about the specific problem; someone who knows how it begins, progresses, and specified treatments. This is an excellent example of how a generalied person may not be equipped enough to handle something as well as a specialized one can.

Another example of a specialist who is needed instead of a generalist involves teaching. In grammar school, children learn all the basic principles of reading, writing, and arithematic. But as children get older and progress in school, they gain a better understanding of the language and mathematical processes. As the years in school increase, they need to learn more and more specifics and details about various subjects. They start out by learning basic math concepts such as addition, subtraction, division, and multiplication. A few years later, they are ready to begin algebraic concepts, geometry, and calculus. They are also ready to learn more advanced vocabulary, the principles of how all life is composed and how it functions. One teacher or professor can not provide as much in depth discussion on all of these topics as well as one who has learned the specifics and studied mainly to know everything that is currently known about one of these subjects. Generalized teachers are required to begin molding students at a very early age so they can get ready for the future ahead of them in gaining more facts about the basic subjects and finding out new facts on the old ones.

These are only two examples of why specialists are not highly overrated and more generalists are not necessary to the point of overshadowing them. Generalists are needed to give the public a broad understanding of some things. But , specialists are important to help maintain the status, health, and safety of our society. Specialists are very necessary.

阅卷人点评——5分

作者展示了一篇发展得较好的文章，讨论了对专才与通才二者的需要以分析该话题的复杂性。
这篇文章基于两个延展的事例，两个例子都选的很好。第一个（第二段）首先讨论了医学通才（全科医生）和专家的必要性，随后转入一个例子中的例子（呼吸问题和对哮喘专家的需要）。这种从一般到具体的延伸特点在下一段的事例也具备。它讨论了教育问题，从小学到高中，从初等运算到微积分。

文章的流利展开得益于恰当的连接词："but," "usually," and "for instance,"。文章以重述作者主旨而结尾。

虽然作者较好地处理了语言和语法，表述模糊的瑕疵让该文落于6分线以下。问题包括指代不明("When a sickness progresses or becomes diagnosed, . . . he may be referred to a specialist")、并列句型出错("how it begins, progresses and specified treatments")、语法松散语言不精确("Generalized teachers are required to begin molding students at a very early age so they can get ready for the future ahead of them in gaining more facts about the basic subjects.")





分析驳论文
理解驳论文

论证驳论文部分考核理解、分析、评价论证程序、用写作清晰表达自己观点的能力。该任务的题目由一篇短文给出，文中，作者就某些事件或行动提出某些理由和证据支持他的陈述。你的任务是审视作者的结论的逻辑结构，批判性地检查各个论证及推理脉络。这要求你十分仔细地阅读短文，多读几遍，甚至就欲展开讨论的条目做点笔记。阅读过程中，特别注意：

·有什么证据、支持和证明？
·明确给出了哪些陈述、宣称和结论？
·有哪些假设可能是未经检验或证明的？
·有哪些隐含的作者的看法或者可推得的结论？

还有，你还必须考虑论证的结构——元素之间的联系方式、组成一条推理脉络，你得认出分隔的、有时候未言明的思考过程，考虑这些思考步骤之间的衔接是否符合逻辑。在追踪的过程中，注意那些表明作者意欲作出逻辑衔接的连接词和短语(e.g., however, thus, therefore, evidently, hence, in conclusion)。

在驳论文中很重要的的一点是弄清什么是没有要求你做的。你不需要讨论论题的陈述正确或精确与否；而该做的是讨论能否从题中确实地得到那些结论和推论。你不用就题给观点表态；但是得就该观点的隐含信息作出评论。与观点陈述任务不同，没人要你发表意见；你要做的是评估别人论证的逻辑性，并在批判的同时展示自己的思辨能力、阅读理解能力、分析写作技巧。这些正是在研究生院制胜的法宝。
“论证分析”最看重的就是思辨能力和随之的书面表达能力，在你的评鉴中展现出来的分析技巧将作为评分的重要依据。

理解写作背景：目的与读者
该任务的目的是考核你深入分析他人论证、以书面形式向学术读者有效传达己方思辨性评论的能力。你的读者包括大学与学院的教职工，他们都经过了GRE阅卷人培训并依据论证分析任务的评分指南的给分。

为了更清楚地了解阅卷人对实际答卷的评分标准，你应该浏览评分样例作文及阅卷人评点。样例作文，尤其是5分和6分作文，将向你展示多种的从文章构思布局、深入展开和深刻批判，到高效地运用语言的技巧。阅卷人将就分析性写作的具体方面，如观点的说服力、阐述与支持、组织结构、句式变换、语言有效性等做出讨论。阅卷人将点评哪些对极有效而深刻的亮点与拉低整体有效性的缺点。

备考论证分析任务
由于该任务意在考察你在多年学习过程中学到的说服性写作技巧，它并不需要任何特别的课程，也不存在因学过某门课而占优势的考生。你可能会发现许多大学作文课本提及的说服性写作建议很有用，但对于该类任务，恐怕连这些建议都稍显理论而专门，你并不需要那么多。没人要求你掌握批判性思维或写作的术语或策略。比如，在一个题目中，一个小学校长称新建操场能提高学生出勤率，因为自从有了新操场，缺课率就下降了。你用不着看出该校长的错误因果谬论，只要知道还有别的能提高出勤率的原因，能举出点常识性的例子，或者提出点能修正这个结论的建议。缺课率下降也可能是由于天气变好了，要让校长的结论正当，就得把这一项因素排除。（貌似前面也这么说过）

虽然你用不着知道具体技能和术语，熟悉一下论证方向和关键概念还是必须的，包括：

·其他解释—可引发题给事件的另一个有竞争性的理由；由于它也可能导致现有事实，所以将削弱或限制原有的理由；
·分析—将某事（如一段论证）分解成各个组成成分的过程，用以理解它们之间是如何协作组成整体的；也是对该过程的结果的描述（常以书面形式）；
·论证—以证据和理由支持的某项陈述；表明某事的正确或错误性的推理脉络；
·假设—为了维持立场而必须坚持的简洁、通常未经说明或查证的观点；被认为理所当然的东西，但只有它正确结论才可能正确；
·结论—推理线的终点，若推理正确则结论有理；结果陈述；
·反例—一个真实或虚构的例子，要与论证中的陈述相悖。

备考论证分析任务的绝佳途径就是练习已公布的题库。没有“最好的”练习方法：有些人喜欢起先无视30分钟的时间限制；如果你这么做，就尽你所需花时间分析题目。无论你用什么方法练习，都应该：

·仔细审题——可能读不只一次；
·尽可能多地认出它的陈述、结论及隐含假设；
·尽可能多地想出其他解释和反例；
·想想哪些其他的证据可以支持或削弱该陈述；
·问问自己，更改论证的哪些部分能让它的推导更合理。

简短写下上述思路，分析得差不多时，参考这些笔记，组织讨论（可以分条列举它们）。随后充实内容，依次展开各论点。即使你不写完全文，分析几个题目、写写提纲也是很有帮助的。更加熟练迅速有自信之后，你该试着在30分钟内完成全文，以培养应考时的时间感——没人愿意在考场上因为就某点谈论过深入彻底、或提供了太多势均力敌的例子，以至于时间花光都没法引出其他的主要论点。

向教授批判性思维和写作的老师求教，或与同学就相同话题讨论、参照评分指南批改作文都将有所裨益。将自己的答卷和评分指南对照，能够帮你找出自己有待提高的地方。

如何解释题目中的数字、比例和统计数据

有些论题中，会给出一些数字、比例和统计数据支持结论。比如，某题可能宣称，今年的社区活动没有去年的受欢迎啦，因为去年有150个人参加，今年只有100个，少了30%。要记得没人让你动计算器去算那些数字比例和统计。你只要评估这些用于支持结论的证据就好。该例中，结论是社区活动不受欢迎了。你应该问问自己：100个人和150个人之间的差别能够支持这个结论吗？记住，这儿还有别的解释；比如，今年天气可能很糟，今年的社区活动开展时间没选好，今年的活动花费多了，或者今年同时还有别的活动在举行。每一个理由都能让今年社区活动的参与率下降，从而削弱“社区活动不受欢迎”的结论。同样的，鉴于比例所代表的实际数字有所不同，比例证据可能支持、也可能削弱一个结论。设想有人称一个学校戏剧社应该得到更多资金，因为它的会员增加了100%。如果原本就有100个人，现在有200人了，那么这100%增长率可谓十分显著。如果原先只有5个人，现在变10个，翻一番也没什么了不起。记住，论证分析题目中的所有数字、比例和统计数据都是作为支持结论的论据出现的，你要时刻考察它们是否真能支持结论。

答卷格式（这一点也跟前面大同小异）

…………见前文相关处

你应该在文章结构和组织上选择支持你的观点和整篇内容的有效方式。这就意味着你尽可以依论证便利的需要划分段落。比如，当你的讨论转向新的分析时，你大概得开始一个新的段落了。你可以就论题展开布局，一行一行地挑刺、讨论；或者首先挑明关键性的存疑假设，随后讨论推理过程中的相关漏洞。同样的，若有利于展示你的重要批判点或引出讨论，你可以采用一些例子（不过得记住，你的论证分析写作考核的不是你举例的能力，而是思辨思维和分析写作的能力）。答卷用什么形式不重要，有见解地分析论证、向学术读者们清晰地表述自己的分析结果才重要。

样题举例

Hospital statistics regarding people who go to the emergency room after roller skating accidents indicate the need for more protective equipment. Within this group of people, 75 percent of those who had
accidents in streets or parking lots were not wearing any protective clothing (helmets, knee pads, etc.) or any light-reflecting material (clip-on lights, glow-in-the-dark wrist pads, etc.). Clearly, these statistics indicate that by investing in high-quality protective gear and reflective equipment, roller skaters will greatly reduce their risk of being severely injured in an accident.
对溜冰后赴急诊室的人群的医院统计数据表明，人们需要保护能力更强的装备。被统计人群中，那些在街道或停车场出事的人里有75%都没有穿戴任何防护服（头盔、护膝等）或任何反光物件（可夹式小灯、发光腕表等）显然，这些数据表明若我们投资高质量的防护和反光装备，溜冰者在事故中受重伤的危险将大大降低。

本题策略

本题引用了具体的医院统计数据以支持“投资高质量的防护和反光装备”能减少溜冰者在事故中受重伤的危险的结论。

展开分析时，你应该问问自己，医院数据是不是真的能支持这个结论。你可以问自己以下问题：

·所有的溜冰者中，在溜冰事故后赴急诊室的人占多大比例？
·那些在溜冰事故后赴急诊室的人能代表一般的溜冰者吗？
·有没有因溜冰事故受伤但没去急诊室的人？
·那些去急诊室的溜冰者伤得重吗？
·那25%的穿了防护服的溜冰者伤得跟75%的没穿的人一样重吗？
·对溜冰者而已，街上和停车场是不是本来就比其他地方危险？
·中等质量的防护服和装备与高质量的相比，在减轻溜冰伤害方面是不是一样有效？
·除了防护服和装备外，是不是还有其他的因素——比如天气、能见度、溜冰技巧——可能与这些溜冰伤害更有联系？

考虑上述问题的可能答案，这能帮你辨认假设、其他理由和弱点，以之展开批判。

答卷举例与阅卷人点评
6分答卷
The notion that protective gear reduces the injuries suffered in accidents seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion. After all, it is the intent of these products to either provent accidents from occuring in the first place or to reduce the injuries suffered by the wearer should an accident occur. However, the conclusion that investing in high quality protective gear greatly reduces the risk of being severely injured in an accident may mask other (and potentially more significant) causes of injuries and may inspire people to over invest financially and psychologically in protective gear.

First of all, as mentioned in the argument, there are two distinct kinds of gear - preventative gear (such as light reflecting material) and protective gear (such as helmets). Preventative gear is intended to warn others, presumably for the most part motorists, of the presence of the roller skater. It works only if the "other" is a responsible and caring individual who will afford the skater the necessary space and attention. Protective gear is intended to reduce the effect of any accident, whether it is caused by an other, the skater or some force of nature. Protective gear does little, if anything, to prevent accidents but is presumed to reduce the injuries that occur in an accident. The statistics on injuries suffered by skaters would be more interesting if the skaters were grouped into those wearing no gear at all, those wearing protective gear only, those wearing preventative gear only and those wearing both. These statistics could provide skaters with a clearer understanding of which kinds of gear are more beneficial.

The argument above is weakened by the fact that it does not take into account the inherent differences between skaters who wear gear and those who do not. If is at least likely that those who wear gear may be generally more responsible and/or safety conscious individuals. The skaters who wear gear may be less likely to cause accidents through careless or dangerous behavior. It may, in fact, be their natural caution and repsonsibility that keeps them out of the emergency room rather than the gear itself. Also, the statistic above is based entirely on those who are skating in streets and parking lots which are relatively dangerous places to skate in the first place. People who are generally more safety conscious (and therefore more likely to wear gear) may choose to skate in safer areas such as parks or back yards.

The statistic also goes not differentiate between severity of injuries. The conclusion that safety gear prevents severe injuries suggests that it is presumed that people come to the emergency room only with severe injuries. This is certainly not the case. Also, given that skating is a recreational activity that may be primarily engaged in during evenings and weekends (when doctors' offices are closed), skater with less severe injuries may be especially likely to come to the emergency room for treatment.

Finally, there is absolutely no evidence provided that high quality (and presumably more expensive) gear is any more beneficial than other kinds of gear. For example, a simple white t-shirt may provide the same preventative benefit as a higher quality, more expensive, shirt designed only for skating. Before skaters are encouraged to invest heavily in gear, a more complete understanding of the benefit provided by individual pieces of gear would be helpful.

The argument for safety gear based on emergency room statistics could provide important information and potentially saves lives. Before conclusions about the amount and kinds of investments that should be made in gear are reached, however, a more complete understanding of the benefits are needed. After all, a false confidence in ineffective gear could be just as dangerous as no gear at all.

阅卷人点评——6分

这份出色的答卷显示了作者深刻的分析能力。引言部分首先指出题目的错误推理可能导致". . . inspire people to over invest financially and psychologically in protective gear,"，随后全面地审查了每个论证漏洞。作者特别指出了削弱论证的几点：

·防护性和预防性装备是不同的；
·有些溜冰者不容易出事，是因为他们天生谨慎负责；
·统计数据没有区分受伤的严重程度；
·不那么高质量的装备可能也很有用。

论证流畅、结构合理，每个论点都充分而有说服力地展开了。此外，作者的文字简洁经济，一般而言没有错误。句式复杂而多变，措辞精确而有表现力。

总而言之，这篇答卷展示了评分指南中6分级别的极高水准。如果作者的辞藻不那么出色，或驳斥的论点不那么多，该文同样能拿到6分。

5分答卷
The argument presented is limited but useful. It indicates a possible relationship between a high percentage of accidents and a lack of protective equipment. The statistics cited compel a further investigation of the usefulness of protective gear in preventing or mitigating roller-skating related injuries. However, the conclusion that protective gear and reflective equipment would "greatly reduce.risk of being severely injured" is premature. Data is lacking with reference to the total population of skaters and the relative levels of experience, skill and physical coordination of that population. It is entirely possible that further research would indicate that most serious injury is averted by the skater's ability to react quickly and skillfully in emergency situations.

Another area of investigation necessary before conclusions can be reached is identification of the types of injuries that occur and the various causes of those injuries. The article fails to identify the most prevalent types of roller-skating related injuries. It also fails to correlate the absence of protective gear and reflective equipment to those injuries. For example, if the majority of injuries are skin abrasions and closed-head injuries, then a case can be made for the usefulness of protective clothing mentioned. Likewise, if injuries are caused by collision with vehicles (e.g. bicycles, cars) or pedestrians, then light-reflective equipment might mitigate the occurences. However, if the primary types of injuries are soft-tissue injuries such as torn ligaments and muscles, back injuries and the like, then a greater case could be made for training and experience as preventative measures.

阅卷人点评——5分

这篇强有力的答卷驳斥了题给论证，指出它"indicates a possible relationship"然而它的结论"is premature."。该答卷提出了三个中心问题，它们的答案可能削弱题给论证的合理性：

·溜冰者的总人数是多少？
·防护服和反光装备在预防或减轻溜冰伤害方面有什么用？
·伤害的类型、原因？

作者从能支持或消弱论证的不同方面论述了上述问题。本文对论题的分析和评论的全面性尚未达到6分所要求的深刻和程度，但其清晰的组织结构、有力的语言运用以及论题展开的充实度超过了4分标准。

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翻译An Introduction to the Analytical Writing Section of the GRE General Test


GRE写作介绍下篇

GRE评分指南：在陈述文中观点的展现
6分
6分答卷展现一个令人信服的、衔接恰当的对话题的复杂性展开的分析，并有技巧地传达作者观点。

典型答卷应当是：
○展现出对话题的深刻的见解；
○发展观点是用有力的理由和/或有说服性的例证；
○始终保持重点突出，结构严谨，观点的组织合乎逻辑；
○表达观点流利、准确，使用生动的词语和句子；
○显示出用标准英文写作（即，语法、用法、组织结构）的能力，但可能略有瑕疵。

5分
5分答卷应对话题的复杂性展开基本有深度、论述清楚的分析，并且清楚地传达作者观点。
该层次的典型答卷应当：

○展现出对话题的较为深刻的见解
○发展观点是用较有力的理由和/或恰当的例证发展观点；
○有重点，大体上结构清晰，观点组织合适；
○表达观点流利、准确，使用生动的词语和句子；
○显示出用标准英文写作（即，语法、用法、组织结构）的能力，但可能略有瑕疵。

4分
4分答卷能够对话题的复杂性展开分析，并且足够地传达作者观点。

该层次的典型答卷应当：

○表现出对话题的明确观点；
○用相关理由和/或例证发展观点；
○有所侧重，结构完整；
○合理清楚地阐释观点；
○可能有些错误，但基本上表现出对掌握了标准英文写作。





GRE评分指南：论证一篇驳论文
6分
6分答卷让人信服而阐述清晰有力地批判论证，技巧纯熟地传达作者意图。

该层次的典型答卷应：

○清晰识别论证中的重要特点，对其作出深刻的分析；
○令人信服地展开论点，逻辑合理地组织结构，用清晰的连接衔接各成分；
○有效地支持批判的主论点；
○ 展现出对语言的控制，包括用词恰当，句式多样；
○表现出对标准英文写作能力的掌握，可能略有瑕疵。

5分
5分答卷基本有深度、论述清楚，清晰地传达作者意图。
该层次的典型答卷应：

○清晰地辨识论证中的重要特点，对其作出较有见解的分析；
○清晰地展开论点，逻辑合理地组织结构，用恰当的连接衔接各成分；
○明智地支持批判的主论点；
○展现出对语言的控制，包括用词恰当，句式多样；
○表现出对标准英文写作能力的掌握，可能略有瑕疵。

4分
4分答卷表现出批判论证、足够地传达作者意图的能力。

该层次的典型答卷应：

○辨识和分析论证中的重要特点；
○让人满意地发展和组织观点，但没有过度的连接；
○支持批判的主论点；
○表现出对语言的足够控制，以合理的清晰度传达观点；
○可能有错误，但基本表现出对标准书面英文写作能力的掌握。



分数等级水平描述

GRE分析性写作部分包括两个独立的分析性写作任务，二者的平均分——而非各自得分——作为该部分的分值。
该分值范围为0分至6分，增减单位为0.5分。

以下针对各分数等级的描述基于整个分析性写作部分（包括观点陈述与论证分析）的完成度。因为该考试衡量的是“分析型写作”，批判性思维的技巧（推理、提炼证据展开观点、阐述复杂概念的能力）比作者掌握的语法和文法等更重要。

6分-5.5分

始终对复杂观点进行了有深度和有洞察力分析；采用逻辑上支持力强的理由和/或非常有说服力的例子发展、支持文章主旨；重点突出，组织结构优秀；句型变换熟练，语言精确，高效地传达文意；可能有不影响文意的瑕疵，但表现出对句子结构和语言运用的纯熟掌握。

5分-4.5分

对复杂观点给出了较有深度的分析；采用逻辑完备的理由和/或选择恰当的例子展开、支持文章主旨；大体上重点突出、组织结构优秀；句型和语言有变换，清晰地传达文意；有不影响文意的瑕疵，但表现出对句子结构和语言运用的擅长。

4分-3.5分

对复杂观点给出了完备的分析；用相关理由和/或例子展开并支持主旨；结构组织合理；清晰合理地传达文意；表现出让人满意的对句子结构及语言用法的掌握能力，但可能有些许影响清晰度的错误。

3分-2.5分

对某一问题进行了部分有效的分析，但在以下几个方面中，文章至少有一方面的缺陷：分析或发展不够；组织结构太弱；常出现因错误而导致的文意模糊或不够清晰，句型或语言用法掌握不够。

2分-1.5分

在分析性写作方面表现出严重不足。在以下几个方面中，文章至少在一个方面漏洞很严重：严重缺乏分析和发展；缺少组织结构；句子结构和语言用法常犯大错，让文意晦涩。

1分-0.5分

在分析性写作方面表现出致命缺陷。在以下几个方面中，文章至少在一个方面出现根本性的缺陷：内容极度混乱或几乎与题目无关；极少或没有发展；严重而贯穿始终的错误导致文意支离破碎。

0分

无法评定该考生的分析性写作能力，因为其文章没有谈论任何与题目相关的内容，而仅是尝试复制题目，或用非英语写作，或文字混乱无法解析。

NS

空白

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前两天忙于考试，今天终于考完前面的两门，这么频繁的考，真怀疑自己是不是回到高三了？！

第四次作业
今天泛读示例的作文，虽然没时间逐字逐句研究，但还是觉得从一个新的角度审视作文确实带来不少感触。
结合我自己的作文写作情况，总结几点自己应该注意的地方：
1 模版化  使用模版确实省力，我的作文也是这么写出来的呃……但是看自己的一篇还可以，看了30篇都是这样就忍不住了，突然有种同请GRE readers 的感觉啊%>_<% 可是同时也很茫然，不知道怎么样才能写出不模版的作文呢，而且自己这种水平到底能不能写出啊
2对题目的分析要透彻，要抓住主要的矛盾，不要把注意力放在如何攻击一些无关紧要的弱点上。
3逻辑 在反驳作者的观点同时要注意自己的逻辑关联
4总的来说，写作和阅读一样，要时时刻刻跳出原题来看，这样就会发现作者逻辑错误的深沉原因，是因为他在某个点上主观的理解为一个隐含的条件了，或者将没有必然联系的事物联想到了一起等等，总之不能仅仅就事论事，应该多分析一步，跳出题目给出的条条框框，审视作者的逻辑前提，这样才能从本质上反驳作者。

暂时能想到的就是这些……下周还要考，继续加油

No time like the present.

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这两次作业都没抢上~
今天学习了同主题写作前两期，收获不少……嗯嗯自我感觉不错

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SPECTACULAR 之【SU & SY SO】汇总贴 & DAY I 主谓一致 阅读笔记

我刚才明明做好的，要提交时就不见了……火大:dizzy:

以下摘录我容易错的和不清楚的地方

1、 并列结构作主语时谓语用复数

Reading and writing are very important.
注意： 当主语由and连结时，如果它表示一个单一的概念，即指同一人或同一物时，谓语动词用单数，and 此时连接的两个词前只有一个冠词。
The iron and steel industry is very important to our life.

3、 谓语动词与前面的主语一致
当主语后面跟有with, together with, like, except, but, no less than, as well as 等词引起的短语时，谓语动词与前面的主语一致。


表示金钱，时间，价格或度量衡的复合名词作主语 时，通常把这些名词看作一个整体，谓语一般用单数。(用复数也可，意思不变。)

5、 指代意义决定谓语的单复数

1） 在代词what, which, who, none, some, any, more, most, all等词的单复数由其指代的词的单复数决定。

All is right. (一切顺利。)

All are present.
(所有人都到齐了。)

6 、与后接名词或代词保持一致

1） 用half of, part of, most of, a portion of 等词引起主语时，动词通常与of后面的名词，代词保持一致。

Most of his money is spent on books.

Most of the students are taking an active part in sports.

2） 在一些短语，如 many a 或 more than one 所修饰的词作主语时，谓语动词多用单数形式。但由more than… of 作主语时，动词应与其后的名词或代词保持一致。

Many a person has read the novel. 许多人都读过这本书。

More than 60 percent of the students are from the city.百分之六十多的学生都来自这个城市。

2. 看似单数却表复数概念
①The police is searching for the robbers. (×）
②The police are searching for the robbers. (√)

[解析] the police译为“警方”，表示复数概念，

特别提醒 all of，most of，half of，the rest of，以及a lot of，some，any+名词作主语时，要根据后面的名词确定谓语动词的单复数。

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SPECTACULAR 之【SU & SY SO】第二期——情态动词

1—— 情态动词的语法特征
1） 情态动词不能表示正在发生或已经发生的事情，只表示期待或估计某事的发生。
2） 情态动词 除ought 和have 外，后面只能接不带to 的不定式。
3） 情态动词没有人称，数的变化，即情态动词第三人称单数不加-s。
4） 情态动词没有非谓语形式，即没有不定式，分词，等形式。

3—— 比较may和might
2） 成语： may/might as well，后面接不带to 的不定式，意为"不妨"。
If that is the case, we may as well try.


7—— 情态动词+ have +过去分词

4) needn't have done sth 本没必要做某事
I dressed very warmly for the trip, but Ineedn't have done so. The weather was hot.
5) would like to have done sth 本打算做某事
I would like to have read the article, but I was very busy then.

9—— had better表示"最好"

had better 相当于一个助动词，它只有一种形式，它后面要跟动词原形。
had better have done sth表示与事实相反的结果，意为"本来最好"。
You had better have come earlier.


11—— will和would
1）would like； Would like to do = want to 想要，为固定搭配。
2）Will you…?Would you like…? 表示肯定含义的请求劝说时，疑问句中一般用some, 而不是any。
Would you like some cake?

情态动词在托福写作中的运用
1首先是情态动词，尤其是Will的漏掉。中国考生受汉语影响，一提到“将来”才会有意识地用will, 实际上will可以表达“能、将、会、要、就”等多种意义。
2其它的常见的漏用还体现在与if引导的状语从句一起连用的主句中， so that或者 in order that引导的从句，或者是与without, in case of等介词短语连用的主句，不论条件还是目的都是写作中经常出现的句式。如:
If I have time tomorrow, I drive to pick you up.

3英式的学风历来讲究严谨，像can 这样语气过于绝对的表达最好换成may/ will, 或者是语气更委婉的might/would probably等，同时还要搭配一定程度的副词，如：
indulgence in computer games can lead to social violence especially of teenagers.上句中can不如might用起来更加客观，因为几乎每个小孩都玩游戏，但绝不是每个人都会犯罪。
4另外一个容易误用的词是should，多表示根据社会风俗习惯个人的责任，而在比较正式的议论文写作中，多数句子是以客观事物做主语的， 所以用should就有些不太恰当，一般我们会用另外一个更客观性的短语be to do来代替， 或者是shall，但是这里的shall不是用于第一人称后的将来时符号，而表示的是一种情态。
5至于must, 因为语气实在强硬，所以一般在社会性的问题的论述上我们要慎用，建议多换成need/ shall/ be to do 或者是be expected to do形式。


3. So many mistakes in your homework! You more careful.
A. may be B. had to C. would be D. should have been

解析：选D. “You should have been more careful”. 意为：你本来应该更细心的。
30. Look at what you have done! You ______ be more careful.
A. ought B. Can C. would D. should

解析：选D. ought 后应用to


6. She didn't answer the phone, she ______ asleep.
A. may be B. must be C. should have been D. must have been

解析：选D. 表示：对过去发生的事情的肯定推测。
7．The little girl’s eyes were red. She ______.
A. may cry B. must cry C. must be cried D. must have been crying

解析：选D. 意为：她刚才肯定一直在哭。对过去某事正发生的推测。


10. ______ Mr. Black_______ go to work by ferry before the bridge was built?
A. Did; used to B. Use; to C. Did; use to D. Does; use to

解析：选C. used to do的疑问式，可以是Used+主语+to do ?或Did +主语+use to do?

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今天开始做第七次作业啦……

Every cloud has a silver lining.

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昨天的作业本来以为十道作文题目的分析应该很快的，不过真正动手开始做就发现我还是喜欢面面俱到，差了很多网站和词典，结果一转眼两个小时过去只做好了两道题，已是凌晨只好作罢……本来以为尽早没课可以继续，结果被通知是一上午满满的课%>_<%，因为1点要交了，所以只好在午休时间赶好后面的作业。
  虽然知道我是这种动作不快的小孩，本着不做就不做，做就要有收获的原则，还是希望以后能吸取教训吧，这两天在忙准备考试，找时间一定把剩下的题目仔细准备了。



It takes all sorts to make a world.  

*take 需要  sort  ~种类的人

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【SU & SY SO】第三期——冠词、数词

摘录下容易忘的……


四.零冠词的用法
1.在专有名词和不可数名词前。例如，Class Two，Tian’an Men Square，water

2.可数名词前已有作定语的物主代词（my，your，his，her等）、指示代词（this/these，that/those）、不定代词（some，any等）及所有格限制时。例如my book(正)；my the book(误)

3.复数名词表示一类人或事物时。例如，They are teachers.

4.在星期，月份，季节，节日前。例如：on Sunday，in March，in spring，on Women’s Day
(特例：如果月份，季节等被一个限定性定语修饰时，则要加定冠词：He joined the Army in the spring of 1982.)

5.在称呼语或表示头衔的名词前。例如：Tom，Mum

6.在学科名称，三餐饭和球类运动名称前。例如：I have lunch at school every day.
特例：当football，basketball指具体的某个球时，其前可以用冠词：I can see a football.我可以看到一只足球。Where’s the football？那只足球在哪儿？(指足球，并非“球类运动”)

7.在表特定的公园，街道，车站，桥，学校等之前。例如：No.25 Middle School

8.某些固定词组中不用冠词。

(1)与by连用的交通工具名称前：by bus\by car\ by bike\ by train\by air\by plane\ by sea\by ship，但take a bus，in a boat，on the bike前需用冠词
(2)名词词组：day and night日日夜夜；brother and sister兄弟姐妹;hour after hour时时刻刻；here and there到处
(3)介词词组：in surprise；on foot；on duty；at work；on time；in class；on show；in bed等
(4)go 短语：go home；go to bed；go to school ；go to work；go shopping/swimming/boating/fishing

六.用与不用冠词的差异

in hospital住院/in the hospital在医院里
go to sea出海/go to the sea去海边
on earth究竟/on the earth在地球上，在世上
in front of在……(外部的)前面/in the front of在……(内部的)前面
take place发生/take the place(of)代替
at table进餐/at the table在桌子旁
by sea乘船/by the sea在海边
in future从今以后，将来/in the future未来
go to school(church…)上学(做礼拜…)/go to the school(church…)到学校(教堂…)去
on horseback骑着马/on the horseback在马背上
two of us我们当中的两人/the two of us我们两人(共计两人)
out of question毫无疑问/out of the question不可能的，办不到的
next year明年/the next year 第二年
a teacher and writer一位教师兼作家(一个人)/a teacher and a writer一位教师和一位作家(两个人)


四.分数的构成
分子用基数词，分母用序数词，分子大于1时，分母加s，如：
1/5：one fifth
2/3：two thirds
2-：two and three quarters


六.百分数的表达法
90%：ninety percent
0.5%：point five percent

七.倍数表达法
表示两倍时用twice，表示三倍以上的倍数时用times。如：
The earth is 49 times the size of the moon.
This desk is twice as large as that one.


八.算式表达法：
8/4：eight divided by four

九.与数词相关的主谓一致原则
4)a+单数名词+or two做主语，谓语动词用单数形式。one or two+复数名词，谓语动词用复数形式。如：
A word or two is missed in the sentence.
One or two words are missed in the sentence.

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本来很奇怪为什么自从上次用邮件交了作业以后就再没有新作业了~是不是我完成的不好啊╮(╯﹏╰）╭伤心中
转念想想还是先把以前的欠账补上吧……

SPECTACULAR 之【SU & SY SO】第四期——虚拟语气
虚拟语气TOEFL考点中处于相对次要地位，但在英文中是比较活跃的用法，对其有所了解, 对读题和写作是会很有帮助。
可大致分为三类
1、对现在事实的虚拟
基本形式：If + were /did等过去式…, …would /could /should /might + do
2、对过去事实的虚拟
基本形式：If + had done…, …would /could / should /might + have done
3、对将来事实的虚拟
基本形式：If + should do…, …would /could /should /might + do; 意思类似汉语中的“万一”
4、虚拟条件句的倒装
虚拟条件句的从句部分如果含有were, should, 或had, 可将if省略，再把were, should或had 移到从句句首，实行倒装。
例句：Were they here now, they could help us.=If they were here now, they could help us.
5、wish的用法
1）用于wish后面的从句，表示与事实相反的情况，或表示将来不太可能实现的愿望： 时态要向后推一层
2）Wish to do表达法。
例句： Wish sb / sth to do=want to do
7、It is (high) time that  It is (high) time that 后面的从句谓语动词要用过去式或用should加动词原形，但should不可省略。
关于should 的问题
注意1：部分动词的宾语从句中需用虚拟语气，形式为should do, 其中should常被省略。
此类动词有：insist, demand, suggest, propose, order, require, decide, ask, request, command等表示命令、建议、要求等.
注意3：在下列形容词引导的that从句中必须要用虚拟语气(should) do，但是由于 should经常被省略，所以实际上用的就是动词原形。
这类形容词有: It is important/ necessary/ proper/ imperative/ essential/ advisable等 + that



8、need "不必做"和"本不该做"
didn't need to do表示：
过去不必做某事, 事实上也没做。.
needn't have done表示：
过去不必做某事, 但事实上做了

注意2：在一些惯用语之后经常需要用虚拟，来表示与事实相反或者难以实现的事情
这类习语有：as if , as though, but for, otherwise, without, wish, if only, for fear that, unless, in case, lest等


我输个验证码要等半年……这破网速

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终于见到第八次作业，仔细看看发现自己还有很多没有完成的（都是第一次作业的……惭愧啊）
【Fundamental Course of Writtng】基础写作每日一讲（12）Conciseness

Conciseness: Methods of Eliminating Wordiness

1. Eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers

减少不必要的限定词和修饰语
Writers sometimes clog up their prose with one or more extra words or phrases that seem to determine narrowly or to modify the meaning of a noun but don't actually add to the meaning of the sentence. Although such words and phrases can be meaningful in the appropriate context, they are often used as "filler" and can easily be eliminated.

以下这张表格让我再用词时能有所参照

kind of sort of type of really basically for all intents and purposes

definitely actually generally individual specific particular

例子：

Wordy啰嗦的

For all intents and purposes, American industrial productivity generally depends on certain factors that are really more psychological in kind than of any given technological aspect.

More Concise精练的

American industrial productivity depends more on psychological than on technological factors.

2. Change phrases into single words

用单词替代短语

Wordy

As you carefully read what you have written to improve your wording and catch small errors of spelling, punctuation, and so on,（等于一个字edit) the thing to do before you do anything else is to try to see where a series of words expressing action could replace the ideas found in nouns rather than verbs.

More Concise

As you edit, first find nominalizations that you can replace with verb phrases.

3. Change unnecessary that, who, and which clauses into phrases 无必要的从句又是一种啰嗦

Wordy

The report, which was released recently...

All applicants who are interested in the job must...

The system that is most efficient and accurate...

More Concise

The recently released report...

All job applicants must...

The most efficient and accurate system...

4. Avoid overusing expletives at the beginning of sentences
避免使用过多强调句

Expletives are phrases of the form it + be-verb or there + be-verb.But using the expletive construction allows the writer to emphasize the urgency of the situation by placing the word imperative near the beginning of the sentence, so the version with the expletive may be preferable.

Wordy

There was a big explosion, which shook the windows, and people ran into the street.

More Concise

A big explosion shook the windows, and people ran into the street.

5. Use active rather than passive verbs

使用主动句

6. Avoid overusing noun forms of verbs

避免过度使用动词的名词形式

7. Reword unnecessary infinitive phrases

避免使用不必要的动词不定式

Wordy

The duty of a clerk is to check all incoming mail and to record it.

More Concise

A clerk checks and records all incoming mail.

8. Replace circumlocutions with direct expressions

用直接的表达替代迂回的描述

e.g. At this/that point in time...=Now/then...

the reason for for the reason that owing/due to the fact that in light of the fact that considering the fact that on the grounds that this is why	=because, since, why
on the occasion of in a situation in which under circumstances in which	=when
as regards in reference to with regard to concerning the matter of where ________ is concerned	=about
it is crucial that it is necessary that there is a need/necessity for it is important that cannot be avoided	=must, should
is able to has the opportunity to has the capacity for has the ability to	=can
it is possible that there is a chance that it could happen that the possibility exists for	=may, might, could

the reason for for the reason that owing/due to the fact that in light of the fact that considering the fact that on the grounds that this is why	=because, since, why
on the occasion of in a situation in which under circumstances in which	=when
as regards in reference to with regard to concerning the matter of where ________ is concerned	=about
it is crucial that it is necessary that there is a need/necessity for it is important that cannot be avoided	=must, should
is able to has the opportunity to has the capacity for has the ability to	=can
it is possible that there is a chance that it could happen that the possibility exists for	=may, might, could

9. Omit words that explain the obvious or provide excessive detail

省略解释明显的或者提供过多的细节

Baseball, （one of our oldest and most popular outdoor summer sports in terms of total attendance at ball parks and viewing on television,可以删）
has （the kind of =a）rhythm（ of play on the field） that alternates between
（times when players passively wait with no action taking place between the pitches to the batter and then times when they explode into action as the batter hits a pitched ball to one of the players and the player fields it）=waiting and explosive action.

10. Omit repetitive wording
省略重复的语言

Redundant Pairs   列出来意义相互重复的词语

Many pairs of words imply each other. Finish implies complete, so the phrase completely finish is redundant in most cases. So are many other pairs of words:

past    memories various  differences each   individual _______ basic fundamentals true facts important   essentials future plans

terrible tragedy end result final outcome free gift past history unexpected surprise sudden crisis

呵呵
个人认为这个表格还可以用来替换文章中反复出现的词，以免词语单调。

Redundant Categories
冗余的分类

Specific words imply their general categories, so we usually don't have to state both. In each of the following phrases, the general category term can be dropped, leaving just the specific descriptive word:

large in size often times of a bright color heavy in weight period in time round in shape at an early time economics field

of cheap quality honest in character of an uncertain condition in a confused state unusual in nature extreme in degree of a strange type

Wordy

During that time period, many car buyers preferred cars that were pink in color and shiny in appearance.

The microscope revealed a group of organisms that were round in shape and peculiar in nature.

More Concise

During that period, many car buyers preferred pink, shiny cars.

The microscope revealed a group of peculiar, round organisms.

关于字数的问题https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=923452

CONCLUSION：

1）“字数”这两个字不是应当出现在我们脑子里的

回答里的那些道理才是

2）ISSUE>=550, ARGUMENT>=450

3）所以才要大家事先把题库过5遍以上（注意，是五遍，不是一遍）这会节省你考场上3-5min超级宝贵的时间

在开始最后的临战模考前

MUST DONE IT！！

对于上面的各项，我的理解是，如果对字数有要求的话，应该是针对有效的字数，也就是要传达观点解释论证的句子。而不要把时间浪费在写这些啰嗦的话上面。

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【Fundamental Course of Writtng】基础写作每日一讲（13）-（15）Proofreading

Proofreading for Commas （连逗号都要仔细看啊！）

Compound Sentence Commas

1. Skim your paper, looking only for the seven coordinating conjunctions（连词）:and, nor, but, so, for, or, and yet.

2. Stop at each of these words to see whether there is an independent clause (a complete sentence), on both sides of it. (For more help, see our handout on independent clauses.)

3. If so, place a comma before the coordinating conjunction. Examples:

She wanted to buy a new car, but she didn't have enough money to do so.
The wind blew fiercely, and the rain poured down.
Alaska was not the last state admitted into the US, nor does it have the lowest total population.

Comma Splices

1. Skim your paper, stopping at every comma.

2. See whether you have an independent clause 独立分句(a sentence) on both sides of the comma.

3. If so, change the sentence in one of the following ways:

reword the sentence to change one clause into a subordinate (or dependent) clause (see our handout on dependent clauses)
add a coordinating conjunction after the comma
replace the comma with a semicolon 分号
replace the comma with a period句号, question mark, or exclamation point感叹号, and capitalize the first
word of the second clause

comma splice: Americans speak too rapidly, this is a common complaint by foreign visitors.
correct: Americans speak too rapidly; this is a common complaint by foreign visitors.
correct: Foreign visitors commonly complain that Americans speak too rapidly.

Introductory Commas

Introductory commas after dependent clauses分句中的逗号

1. Skim your paper, looking only at the first two or three words of each sentence.

2. Stop if one of these words is a dependent marker such as while, because, when, if, after, when, etc. (see our Commas After Introductions).

3. If necessary, place a comma at the end of the introductory dependent clause. Examples:

While I was writing, the phone rang.
Because the weather was bad, we decided to cancel our planned picnic.
After the last guests left the party, we had to begin cleaning the house.

Other introductory commas

1. Skim your paper, looking only at the first word or two of each sentence.

2. Stop if the word or phrase . . .

ends in -ing

is an infinitive (to + verb)

is an introductory word (well, yes, moreover, etc.)

3. Place a comma at the end of the introductory phrase. Examples:

To get a good grade, you must turn in all your homework problems.
Walking to work, Jim stopped for coffee at the diner.
Yes, I agree that the exam was difficult.

4. If the sentence begins with a prepositional phrase (a phrase beginning with in, at, on, between, with, etc.), place a comma after the prepositional phrase if it is longer than three words or suggests a distinct pause before the main clause. Examples:

On his way to work, Jim stopped for coffee at the diner.
In those days we wrote with a pen and paper.
Across the street from the library, an old man waited for a bus.

Disruptive Commas 破坏性的逗号，也就是不需要逗号的地方

For disruptive commas between compound verbs or objects

1. Skim your paper, stopping only at the coordinating conjunctions: and, or, nor, but, so, for, and yet.

2. Check to see whether there is an independent clause (sentence) on both sides of the conjunction. If so, place a comma before the conjunction. If not, do not place a comma before the conjunction.

disruptive comma: They bought two pizzas, but ate only one.
correct: They bought two pizzas but ate only one.

For disruptive commas between subjects and verbs

1. Find the subject and verb in each of your sentences.

2. Make sure that you have not separated the subject from the verb with one comma. It's often all right to have a pair of commas between a subject and verb for nonessential clauses and phrases that might be added there, but rarely is a single comma acceptable.

disruptive comma: That man sitting in the train station, is the person I'm supposed to meet.

correct: That man sitting in the train station is the person I'm supposed to meet.

Series Commas

Commas with Nonessential Elements

1. Skim your paper, looking for a phrase or clause in each sentence that explains or gives more information about a word or phrase that comes before it.

2. If you can delete the phrase or clause and still keep the meaning, the phrase or clause is probably nonessential and needs two commas, one before and one after (unless the phrase or clause is at the end of the sentence).

3. As an alternate test for a nonessential phrase or clause, try saying "by the way" before it. If that seems appropriate to the meaning, the phrase or clause is probably nonessential. To understand the essential vs. nonessential distinction, compare the following sentences. In the first, the clause who cheat is essential; in the second, the clause who often cheats is nonessential.

Students who cheat
only harm themselves.
Fred, who often cheats, is just harming himself.

Take a break!
Leave yourself enough time.  
Read aloud.   
Role-play.
Get others involved.Find out what errors you typically make.
Learn how to fix those errors.
Use specific strategies.
Finding Common ErrorsProofreading
   
Do NOT rely on your computer's spellcheck—it will not get everything! 如果没有word更正语法，我会错好多的
Examine each word
Be especially careful of words that are typical spelling nightmares, like "ei/ie" words and homonyms like your/you're, to/too/two, and there/their/they're.
Make sure each sentence has a subject.
Make sure each sentence has a complete verb.
See that each sentence has an independent clause; remember that a dependent clause cannot stand on its own.


Run-on Sentences

·Review each sentence to see whether it contains more than one independent clause.

If there is more than one independent clause, check to make sure the clauses are separated by the appropriate punctuation.

If there are two main clauses, they should be connected with a comma and a conjunction like and, but, for, or, so, yet.

Find the subject of each sentence.

Find the verb that goes with the subject.

Skim your paper, stopping at each pronoun.

Search for the noun that the pronoun replaces.

If you can't find any noun, insert one beforehand or change the pronoun to a noun.

If you can find a noun, be sure it agrees in number and person with your pronoun.

Apostrophes 撇号

Skim your paper, stopping only at those words which end in "s." If the "s" is used to indicate possession, there should be an apostrophe, as in Mary's book.

Look over the contractions, like you're for you are, it's for it is, etc. Each of these should include an apostrophe.

Remember that apostrophes are not used to make words plural. When making a word plural, only an "s" is added, not an apostrophe and an "s."

Suggestions for Proofreading Your Paper One of the most difficult parts of the writing process are proofreading. It is easy for us to see what we want to see, not necessarily what our readers will see. These suggestions should help you take a step back and view your writing more objectively.


Suggestions for Editing (Proofreading) your Paper Read your Paper Aloud Any time your text is awkward or confusing, or any time you have to pause or reread your text, revise this section. If it is at all awkward for you, you can bet it will be awkward for your reader.


Examine your Paragraphs Examine the overall construction of your paragraphs, looking specifically at length, supporting sentence(s), and topic sentence. Individual paragraphs that are significantly lacking length or sufficient supporting information as well as those missing a topic sentence may be a sign of a premature or under-developed thought.


Track Frequent Errors Keep track of errors that you make frequently. Ask your teacher or visit the Writing Lab for assistance in eliminating these errors.


Revising for Cohesion This material (adapted from Style: Ten Lessons in Clarity and Grace, by Joseph Williams) will help students revise sentences for cohesion.
Two Principles

Begin sentences with short, simple words and phrases that a) communicate information that appeared in previous sentences, or b) build on knowledge that you share with your reader.

In a paragraph, keep your topics short and reasonably consistent.

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真不知道怎么回事啊……我快被折腾疯了
今天一整天发帖都提交不了，怎么试都不行，现在有突然都出来了！一下多了这么多一摸一样的帖啊，还删不掉~加上今天电脑也抽，唉！



p.s 好不容易整出来了，我画的颜色都不见了 格式也不对！~~~~(>_<)~~~~


      12/7 今天又试了，颜色还是上不去，放弃了

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【Fundamental Course of Writtng】基础写作每日一讲（16）Metaphors

适量的比喻对于行文的明晰很有帮助

同时，还能增加文章的亮点

Using Metaphors in Creative Writing

1.
Metaphors的定义

列举出数种定义是为了让我们更好地理解隐喻的特点

definitions below: · a comparison between two things, based on resemblance or similarity, without using "like" or "as" most dictionaries and textbooks · the act of giving a thing a name that belongs to something else Aristotle · the transferring of things and words from their proper signification to an improper similitude for the sake of beauty, necessity, polish, or emphasis Diomedes · a device for seeing something in terms of something else Kenneth Burke · understanding and experiencing one thing in terms of another John Searle · a simile contracted to its smallest dimensions Joseph Priestly

Related terms extended or telescoping metaphor: A sustained metaphor. The teacher descended upon the exams, sank his talons into their pages, ripped the answers to shreds, and then, perching in his chair, began to digest. implied metaphor: A less direct metaphor. John swelled and ruffled his plumage (versus John was a peacock) mixed metaphor: The awkward, often silly use of more than one metaphor at a time. To be avoided! The movie struck a spark that massaged the audience's conscience. dead metaphor: A commonly used metaphor that has become over time part of ordinary language. tying up loose ends, a submarine sandwich, a branch of government, and most clichés simile: A comparison using "like" or "as" Her face was pale as the moon. metonym: The substitution of one term for another with which it is commonly associated or closely related. the pen is mightier than the sword, the crown (referring to a Queen or King), hands (referring to workers who use their hands), synecdoche: The substitution of a part for the whole or vice versa (a kind of metonym). give us this day our daily bread

Why use metaphors? 为什么使用隐喻啊 · They enliven ordinary language. 可以增加文章活力，显示自己技高一筹 · They are generous to readers and listeners; they encourage interpretation. 吸引读者，也就是考官的眼球 · They are more efficient and economical than ordinary language; they give maximum meaning with a minimum of words. 将大量信息汇入少数的语言中 · They create new meanings; they allow you to write about feelings, thoughts, things, experiences, etc. for which there are no easy words; they are necessary. 创造出新的意境 · They are a sign of genius. 这个么…… Creative ways to use metaphors as verbs The news that ignited his face snuffed out her smile. as adjectives and adverbs Her carnivorous pencil carved up Susan's devotion. as prepositional phrases The doctor inspected the rash with a vulture's eye. as appositives or modifiers On the sidewalk was yesterday's paper, an ink-stained sponge. Examples Scratching at the window with claws of pine, the wind wants in. Imogene Bolls, "Coyote Wind" What a thrill--my thumb instead of an onion. The top quite gone except for a sort of hinge of skin....A celebration this is. Out of a gap a million soldiers run, redcoats every one. Sylvia Plath, "Cut" The clouds were low and hairy in the skies, like locks blown forward in the gleam of eyes. Robert Frost, "Once by the Pacific" Little boys lie still, awake wondering, wondering delicate little boxes of dust. James Wright, "The Undermining of the Defense Economy"

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0910AW SPECTACULAR 之【SU & SY SO】第五期——倒装
我觉得倒装确实不太熟悉，使用起来也没底气……今天好好学学


【什么是倒装】如果句子谓语提前，则句子为倒装语序（inverted order），分为 完全倒装（full inversion）和部分倒装（partial inversion）

哪些词可以当谓语？在网上查了查：
1. be + 表语
2. 行为动词
3. There be +主语+状语中的be 就是作谓语

Full inversion: 整个谓语提前，如：There comes the bus   (在此我查到一点：如果主语为代词，就不需要倒装了 There it comes !)

就是整个谓语倒装到主语前面        谓语+主语+……

Partial inversion: 只有部分谓语提前，如：How are you doing?
把谓语中的助动词或情态动词倒装到主语之前，将谓语的其余部分留在主语之后，如果没有助动词则需在主语之前加上do/does/did       助动词+主语+……


【一些常见的倒装句】
1，由引导词there 引导的句子：
There’s an outdoor concert tonight in the park
2, 由there , here, now, then 等副词引导的句子。
There comes the rest of the party.
3, 由so, neither, nor 引导的句子：
I like singing and so does Helen
I don’t eat meat and neither does Tom.
Nor will I deny that

【一些状语从句中的倒装语序】
1、有些有If引导的条件状语从句（主要包含有were, had, should 的从句），可以把IF省略，把上述动词放到主语前面去：
Weren’t it for their assitance, we wouldn’t be able to do so well.=If it weren't for their assitance,……
Had we got there earlier, we would have caught the train.
Should Mary call, say that I'll be back in an hour.

2、有些让步状语从句中又是也有倒装的情况，（主要把表语或部分谓语提前）：
Clever though he was, he couldn’t conceal his eagerness for praise.
Try as I would, I couldn’t make her change her mind.

【某些副词或状语引导的倒装句】
1、些又否定意义的副词，若放在句首，句子常用倒装。
表示否定意义的副词有： not 、 never 、nor 、neither 、nowhere 等等。
半否定副词  seldom rarely little hardly scarcely 等等

Never would he know what she had suffered.
Never before has such a high standard been achieved.
Scarcely was she out of sight when he came
。
2, 有个别其他副词放在句首时，又是也会有这个现象：
Often /well /always /once /many a time 这些副词做频率状语或方式状语出现在句首时有时会因为强调而引起倒装
Often would she(she would) weep when alone.
Bitterly did he repent that decision. 他深深地悔恨那个决定。
Gladly would I give my life to save the child.
。
3, 有些短语，（特别是介词短语）移到句首时也可能引导倒装语序：

On no account must we give up this attempt.
Under no circumstances could we agree to such a principle.

一般这类的都是一些否定含义的短语，类似的还有：In vain, not until, at no point
还有表示唯一的，如：only in this way
So…that结构： So bright was the moon that the flowers were bright as by day.
。

。
【一些谓语前移的情况】

1、<状语前置>有些句子没有宾语且主语又比较长。又是可把状语提前，而把主语放在谓语后面去。

Before him lay miles of undulating moorland: 他前面是一片高低起伏的荒原

After the banquet came a firework display in the garden. 宴会后花园里燃放了烟火。

From the distance came occasional shots. 从远处传来零星的枪声。

In the distance could be seen the purple mountains. 远处可以看见紫色的群山。

2、为了描绘更生动，有些与介词同行的副词可以移到句首，把主语放在谓语后面。
这类词有：away / down/ in /off /out /up
Up went the arrow into the air. 嗖的一声箭射上了天。

She rang the bell. In came a girl she had not seen before. 她按铃，进来一个她从未见过的姑娘。

Down flew the eagle to seize the chicken 老鹰飞下来抓小鸡。




【分词和表语移到句首的情况】

1、进行时态中的分词有时可移到句首，来对这个动作加以强调。
Lying on the floor was a boy aged about seventeen.
Standing beside the table was an interpreter
Watching the performances were mostly foreign tourists.
。
2, 已过去分词做表语的句子，过去分词有时也可以提前，把主语放到后面去。
The most widely distributed is the Hui people
Seated on the ground are a group of young people.
Hidden underground is a wealth of gold, silver, lead and zinc.
。
3, 作表语的介词短语有时也可以提前。
Among its products are farm machines and mining equipment.
Around the lake are a huge number of farms.
Near the sourthen end of the village was a large pear orchard.
。
4, 其他表语也可提前
Worst of all is the humiliations he suffered. 最不堪的是他经受的许多屈辱。
Below is a restaurant.
Higher up were forests of white birches. 在往上去是一片白桦林。
。。


【其他倒装句】

1，祝愿的句子:
Long live world peace! 世界和平万岁！
May you have a long and happy life. 祝你幸福长寿。

2、间接引语后的插入语，主语有时可放在谓语后面：
“I do hope,” said Nancy, “they haven’t all forgotten about it.”
。
3, 有时修辞上的考虑，表语也可以提前：
Very grateful we are for your help.
A very reliable person he is, to be sure. 他是个很可靠的人，没问题。