Romanus的作文修改铺 *2010年4月1日起已停，谢谢支持*

mpromanusUID: 2565872

> 不知道为什么，我从楼主评语里面学到的东西，会用的比从其他渠道（比如原版教材、economist、满分范文等）学来的东西更顺。可能是因为楼主的评论，议论性很强，句子简单，用词凝练吧。但最重要可能是，看楼主的评论，我很轻易就能想起对应的中文句子或词语，印象就特别深刻。不像其他渠道里的一些文章，看着真是文采飞扬啊，但就是想半天不知道中文具体翻成什么；即使配有中文翻译，也无法一一对应的翻过去。

大汗。果然还是有非纯正母语使用者的痕迹 =.= 自大学开始没有老师一直督促，看来是懒散了很多。。我也要加油注意自己的语言了。。=.=

好吧，还是厚脸皮地为自己辩护一下：我写评语是属于casual writing，不像教材还是economist，都是formal writing，而且有好多专业词汇，风格不一样的，所以你看到的 顺， 主要是风格不同的表现而已，并不是因为我语言间隙比较小什么的。。（其实我自己也知道我写出来的东西不是完全没有问题的。。就是比较懒 =.=）

给我举个你看着文采飞扬却不知道中文怎么翻或者无法对应的例子吧。。 =.=

tbs2010UID: 2752381

哦，那好吧，我就是觉得我的文章中的两个论点好像又有些重复:L ，那就麻烦你帮我简单看一下吧，谢啦！ 159# mpromanus

chjwUID: 2663731

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1055500-1-1.html
楼主啊，我又来排队了，不知道要盼到何年何月了。。
你上次帮我提得意见很实用的，再次感谢！

御风凌歆UID: 2738216

对不起我没仔细看首楼……那我慢慢等吧
LZ真的辛苦了

carriexuUID: 2559756

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... xtra=#pid1773554107麻烦楼主帮忙修改啦~

chiivyUID: 2709743

> 大汗。果然还是有非纯正母语使用者的痕迹 =.= 自大学开始没有老师一直督促，看来是懒散了很多。。我也要加油注意自己的语言了。。=.=
  
好吧，还是厚脸皮地为自己辩护一下：我写评语是属于casual writing，不像教材还是economist，都是formal writing，而且有好多专业词汇，风格不一样的，所以你看到的 顺， 主要是风格不同的表现而已，并不是因为我语言间隙比较小什么的。。（其实我自己也知道我写出来的东西不是完全没有问题的。。就是比较懒 =.=）

给我举个你看着文采飞扬却不知道中文怎么翻或者无法对应的例子吧。。 =.=

mpromanus 发表于 2010-1-29 10:16

一些中文英文都很好的ABC，他们的中英文就是一一对应的。说是非母语者的痕迹，也算吧，反正两种语言对他们来说都是母语，互相影响是很正常的。两个语言体系都很牢固，都几乎进化成本能的话，相互磨损不太可能，只会相互促进，就像两个齿轮之间的无缝对接。

formal writing的风格是什么呢？咱们现在练的托福独立作文算不算是formal Writing的预备阶段呢？

说到文采飞扬又死活翻不出来的句子，那是相当多呀。。。比如：the second myth is that most entrepreneurs are just out of short trousers.

mpromanusUID: 2565872

> 一些中文英文都很好的ABC，他们的中英文就是一一对应的。说是非母语者的痕迹，也算吧，反正两种语言对他们来说都是母语，互相影响是很正常的。两个语言体系都很牢固，都几乎进化成本能的话，相互磨损不太可能，只会相互促进，就像两个齿轮之间的无缝对接。

我觉得两种语言之间完全一一对应的话，日常用语可以，文化方面比较难 =.=

> formal writing的风格是什么呢？咱们现在练的托福独立作文算不算是formal Writing的预备阶段呢?

formal writing也分很多种，普遍地说是句子的语法要正确，词汇要正式，表意要详尽。现在的托福作文可以算是预备。

> 说到文采飞扬又死活翻不出来的句子，那是相当多呀。。。比如：the second myth is that most entrepreneurs are just out of short trousers.

这个正是我说的 文化方面比较难 的例子。。=.= 这是英式文化下特有的表达，你不知道这件事儿的话没法翻的，但只要跟你一解释这是怎么回事儿保准就容易翻了。。英式的校服，年轻小男生都是穿短裤的，要到年龄大了才穿长裤，所以 才脱短裤 就是代表很年轻、刚算个小大人儿的意思。这种校服穿法在以前是英国殖民地的国家还能看到。西方的学校传统上是非常重视长幼有序的，中国现在没有这种以服装样式区分长幼的，所以不会翻很正常。。要翻的话应该对应传统的 年及弱冠 之类的概念。

屋顶的眼睛UID: 2730078

楼主大人，拜托了~~
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1055724&extra=
狠拍之，谢谢谢~~

lxb200709UID: 2665924

麻烦帮忙改一下，谢谢。。。 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people think children should study and play, other people think children should help with household chores. Interestingly, nowadays people are prone to debate whether students should study and play or help with household chores, which seems a question-that is, virtually not for they both essential to a juvenile, devoid of each of them, an adolescent will grow up with regret. It seems true that study is the main job of students and play is a tributary method to enhance their study. However, this theory will cultivate quantities of scholars who can do research pretty good, whereas have no idea about their own life. For example, currently, it's a common situation that college students, even some elite students in the key college, can not merely wash their clothes, fold the beds, not to mention make a meal. What contributes to this consequence at all? It's over spoil; it's the misconception that when a student do a good job in his study, he will act well in his life and later have a brilliant future. In this case, many college students can't even get job after graduating from university owing to the lack of experience of surviving alone, that's so called independent. Of course, there is no way around the fact that students only do housework at home will perform better, which appears ridiculous in some way. In China, there are nonetheless some parents who prohibit their children, especially girls, going to school to accept education. Instead, they drive their kids accompany with them to do household chores everyday, which accordingly can decrease their workload to support a family. What a irresponsible and selfish deed it is! Neglecting their kids' future, benefiting themselves ephemerally, I really fell humiliate at these parents. In this situation, which triggers China's labor markets that are always teemed with a great number of working force who without little technique, and these kids' future are ruined by their mean parents as a result. In sum, contradicting the above two cases, we can clearly conclude that each option of the dispute, actually, is an sort of extreme, resulting in predicament to the students undoubtedly when grow up. Thereby, only by combining the intelligence of study and the practice of common chores could students grow up healthily in their lifetime.

mpromanusUID: 2565872

174楼：请注意规则，作文求改请单独发帖然后把链接跟在这里，否则无效，不予受理。。=.= 谢谢合作~鞠躬~

chiivyUID: 2709743

> 一些中文英文都很好的ABC，他们的中英文就是一一对应的。说是非母语者的痕迹，也算吧，反正两种语言对他们来说都是母语，互相影响是很正常的。两个语言体系都很牢固，都几乎进化成本能的话，相互磨损不太可能，只会 ...
mpromanus 发表于 2010-1-29 18:21

没有想到短裤子还是一项有意思的小传统，看到有点像传说中的借代或者借喻吧？
年及弱冠？
哇，这个说法非常非常传神~~！

我是专门来感谢M同学的~~
拿到雅思成绩后，复习12天就去考托福

查了成绩，W25，一个good一个fair，挺满足的，感谢楼主~！！

mpromanusUID: 2565872

176# chiivy

不谢，好成绩也有你自己的努力啊~

edmundzhuUID: 2758464

lz好人，辛苦了，帮忙看看我的这边文章，提点意见，我还有个努力的方向啊！
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1056451&extra=

lxb200709UID: 2665924

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1056456&extra=
谢谢提醒，改过来了，麻烦修改一下。。

mpromanusUID: 2565872

顶一下。。

今天一考通过拿到驾照了，祝贺自己一个，哈哈哈~