cjlu的作文修改铺

after17UID: 2681985

TOPIC: ISSUE56 - "Governments should focus more on solving the immediate problems of today rather than trying to solve the anticipated problems of the future."
WORDS: 493
TIME: 01:15:14
DATE: 2010/2/6 22:59:34

It is true that sometimes government should pay more attention to solve the immediate problems of today rather than to solve the future problems. However, in certain period, we had better emphasis on problems of the future at first. Therefore I cannot agree with the statement


First and foremost, conceding that it is a profound idea to solve problems for now before we take actions to future problems sometimes, since in such a highly developed society, there are enormous vital problems remained to be solved. Recent year, influencing by the financial crisis, a myriad of companies run bankrupt. As a result, millions of people become layoff so they have to hunt new jobs. However, it is difficult for them to do so, owing to the depression in economy. With the unemployment, people's lives are miserable and some of them may even hunt jobs while suffer from starvation. At this time government should centralize the work on how to prosper the economy of the nation other than deal with other things. If government pays little attention to this problem, we can image that people living in a miserable life would commit crime or even rise rebellion Then the country will suffer difficulties and in a unstable situation.This may worse the condition in the country since foreigners do not intend to invest in a unsteady nation. so under such circumstance, government should focus more on solving current problems.

Nevertheless, long-term programs still play a key role in our life, thus we cannot ignore them. For example, education for youth will pay much more than we expend. Youth is the future of one country, because when they grow up, it is their duty to flourish their hometown. If they are lacking of necessary knowledge to make solutions for their nation, what is the future of the nation? The answer is on the surface: the country will remain undeveloped. In this way education for youth cannot be ignored Correspondingly, problems of future are crucial in peaceful time and should be solved at first time.

In addition, another problem involving environment has to be solved before some current affairs. In human history, there are several disasters involving environmental problems. For instance, the big smog, a severe air pollution event that affected London in 1952, comes to my mind. Collected airborne pollutants mostly from the use of coal form a thick layer of smog over the city. Thousands of people had died and tens of thousands people were ill due to the effects of smog on human respiratory tract. This example suggests that substantial development is essential thus anticipated problems of the future have the priority for being solved.

Considering all those facets, I draw the conclusion that we should not emphasis too much on one side of the total problem. In different situations, the ordinal work changes. Without solving present difficulties, our nation will not be stable; with future problems leaving unsolved, we cannot expect our nation flourishing

nanali19UID: 2658056

请楼主帮忙点评下我的argument， 第一篇，不太好，麻烦了。
下一楼是7*7=49楼，符合点评顺序的。

nanali19UID: 2658056

Argument174 The following recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff of Grove College, a private institution, to the college's governing committee.

"We recommend that Grove College preserve its century-old tradition of all-female education rather than admit men into its programs. It is true that a majority of faculty members voted in favor of coeducation, arguing that it would encourage more students to apply to Grove. But eighty percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted the school to remain all female, and over half of the alumni who answered a separate survey also opposed coeducation. Keeping the college all-female, therefore, will improve morale among students and convince alumni to keep supporting the college financially."

        In the argument, the administration of Grove College (GC) suggests that the college keep its status quo, according to the statistics of two seemingly reliable surveys, mainly. However, the argument cannot convince me with the following reasons.

     First, the two statistics are not sufficiently credible without more detailed information. It is true that 80% of the respondent students and over 50% alumnae respondents are in favor of all-female education, but we are not informed the proportion of the respondents. Obviously a few respondents’ preferences cannot represent most of the others. Perhaps the student government selectively investigates some clubs that are made up of girls who dislike males. And perhaps only a few alumnae response the survey in time, most of whom are in support of all-female education.

     Secondly, no explicit evidences prove the relationship between the improvement of students’ moral and all-female education. Lacking comparison with co-education and impeccable survey statistics, it is difficult for me to trust that students’ moral would be better if the GC keeps status quo. Maybe a period of time later, the students of GC find that they prefer co-education.

     Thirdly, alumnae’s financial supporting to the college is not merely decided by the policy of recruiting students. Perhaps, they donate because they love their alma mater, take pride in GC, would like help the juniors, or desire a good fame. What is more, maybe the majority of financial supporting comes from a small part of alumnae who happened to miss the survey, and actually, they considered that co-education would be a better form for GC. Thereby, they would donate more money if GC changes its policy of recruiting students.

     In sum, lacking more detailed information concerning the proportion of respondents in the two surveys, the methodology of the surveys, the evidences that can indicate all-female education’s influence on students’ moral, and the desire of main donators, the argument cannot convince me that keeping the college all-female is better than changing into co-education to GC.

quechuangyiUID: 2761926

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1059070-1-1.html
这是我写的第二篇issue，觉得自己写的太烂了，可是在过差不多两个星期就要考试，我也觉得已经来不及了，希望大人赶紧帮我指点指点！！

海凝冷月UID: 2604584

issue15 第一次写作文，希望帮着修改一下
Issue 15- The stability of a society depends on how it responds to the extremes of human behavior.

用时：53分钟   字数：434

The speaker claims that the response of a society towards the extremes of human behavior determines the stability of it. I fundamentally agree with the speaker's assertion, however, I also admit that this kind of response is not the sole warrant of the societial stability.

The treatment of a society towards the extreme human behaviors, especially those evil ones such as murder or arson, mirrors the bottom line of its moral value. Though differs from countries to countries, almost all communities show their determination to eliminate severe crimes as thorough as possible. Governments enact rules and regulations, and punishment if necessary, to regulate the behaviors of their citizens China, as well as some states in the United States, allows execution for those who commited unforgivable crimes. These punishments, though seem brutal to some extend, help to establish the basic societal order which can contribute to the harmony of the society.

The extremes of human behaviors, on the other hand, represent not only the evil ones. Tremenderous contributions are also included. The encouragement and reward given by the government towards those who have devoted their lives to making contributions to the welfare of people and the prosperity of society can also serve as the stimulus for its citizens in persuit of achivements beneficial both themselves and the whole community. Firstly, the government can by this way provide those misery teenagers with a shining beacon of advancement. In addition, it will trigger grown-ups to strive for acomplishments in assorted fields, which will fortunately enhance the overall living conditions the the society. Last but not the least, a favourable atmosphere where respects knowledge and talent and outstanding people can be established, which can lead the society to the track of sound progress.

Admittedly, how a society responds to the extremes of human behavior plays a consequentail role for its stability. There are still other matters, however, contribute to the hamouny of a society. So long as the poverty still exists, so long as the hunger and starvation are not eliminated, so long as discrimination is not thoroughly gone, there will still be potential threat for the stability and harmony of society.

In sum, the social stability, to some extend, relies on the government's response towards the extremes, whether evil or admirable, of human behavior, though it is not the sole matter that affect the harmony. Governments should take measures to ensure equality of rules and regulations, to amplify incentive scheme for those who have made their marks in respective fields, and to trackle enduring problems such as starvation and poverty, so as to ensure the stability and promote the prosperity.