ARGUMENT203

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

TOPIC: ARGUMENT203 - The following appeared in a newspaper feature story.

"At the small, nonprofit hospital in the town of Saluda, the average length of a patient's stay is two days; at the large, for-profit hospital in the nearby city of Megaville, the average patient stay is six days. Also, the cure rate among patients in the Saluda hospital is about twice that of the Megaville hospital. The Saluda hospital has more employees per patient than the hospital in Megaville, and there are few complaints about service at the local hospital. Such data indicate that treatment in smaller, nonprofit hospitals is more economical and of better quality than treatment in larger, for-profit hospitals."
WORDS: 489
TIME: 00:05:00
DATE: 2010-1-23 17:18:12

The newspaper feature concludes that the hospital which nonprofit and smaller treatment is cheaper and better than for-profit and larger treatment hospital. To support this conclusion, the author cites three facts: Saluda's average length of a patient's stay is shorter than Megavile's; Saluda's cure rate among patients is about twice that of the Megavile; Saluda's complaints about service are few at the local hospital and their each patient has more employees than Megaville. However, the argument suffers a series of logical flaws and critical problems, and is therefore wholly unpersuasive.

To begin with, the author only provide the average length of a patient's stay for the two hospitals, however, the number of samples and the condition of subjects are both vague. Unfortunately, some other possibilities may lead to the average length increase or decrease besides the better quality. For instance, perhaps the Saluda hospital is too small and poor to treat those grave diseases and they can only treat small ill such as cold, fever and headache. Therefore, the condition of patients in Saluda hospital is slight and those serious patients totally send to Megaville hospital for the reason that it is larger and better. Thus, the Saluda's average length of a patient's stay is undoubtedly longer than Megaville's. In addition, the error of second fact about the cure rate among patients is similar to the first fact. So, these two facts are both unwarranted.

Moreover, the third fact that the Saluda hospital has few complaints is also questionable. The author only cites the fact, but without any further support to prove that fact. More importantly, the author begs a pivotal data-- the amount of patients in every hospital. Without this vital number, the author cannot simply obtain the number of per patient’s employees and the total count of complaints about service. It is possible, for example, that the Saluda hospital has only a little patients and a myriad of doctors, on the country, Megaville has vast patients. Therefore, even though Megaville also has a number of employees, their patient's per employees cannot compare with Saluda's. Similarly, the huge amount of patients unavoidably could lead to more complaints no matter how great of their service.

Finally, even if we assume that all the facts as mentioned above are whole truth, we cannot conclude the Saluda hospital is more economical just for the reason that it's smaller and nonprofit. Perhaps, the operational coats of the Saluda are higher than the Megaville’s, such as the price of medicines, the salary of doctors and the expense of hospital’s rents. Thus, the Saluda’s cost of whole process of treatment must higher than the Megaville, though it’s smaller and nonprofit.

In conclusion, the statement cannot be taken serious as it stands. To better evaluate the argument we would need to know the number of each hospital's patients to exactly count the average and per data. Moreover, it must show the fee and the treatment quality of each hospital to support is conclusion.

昨天发上来的ISSUE有很多人帮忙改，提出了很多宝贵的意见，让我受益匪浅，也受宠若惊
对于只有十几天的我来说，现在每一篇练习对我来说都很重要，所以希望好心人帮我批改一下
我真的不知道除了谢谢我还能怎么表达自己的感激之情了。。。。。。

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

先去写一篇ISSUE去了~这次我打算试试随机~在还没看完题库的情况下~
希望写完回来能有好心人回我~嘿嘿~是不是太贪心了~

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

issue写不下去~argu的提纲也看不下去~烦死我了现在~

flearUID: 2533174

确实太贪心了。。别人帮你改的文章 你自己要重新改过 不然太对不起人了
tOPIC: ARGUMENT203 - The following appeared in a newspaper feature story.

"At the small, nonprofit hospital in the town of Saluda, the average length of a patient's stay is two days; at the large, for-profit hospital in the nearby city of Megaville, the average patient stay is six days. Also, the cure rate among patients in the Saluda hospital is about twice that of the Megaville hospital. The Saluda hospital has more employees per patient than the hospital in Megaville, and there are few complaints about service at the local hospital. Such data indicate that treatment in smaller, nonprofit hospitals is more economical and of better quality than treatment in larger, for-profit hospitals."
WORDS: 489
TIME: 00:05:00
DATE: 2010-1-23 17:18:12

The newspaper feature（搞清楚主语 主语是feature story） concludes that the hospital which(+is) nonprofit and smaller treatment is cheaper and better than for-profit and larger treatment hospital.(没把握的话还是原文吧 此句语法错误太多 原文比较的是treatment而你上来就是hospital which，就算语感好这个句子也写不下来) To support this conclusion, the author cites three facts: Saluda's average length of a patient's stay is shorter than Megavile's; Saluda's cure rate among patients is about twice that of the Megavile; Saluda's complaints about service are few at the local hospital and their each patient has more employees than Megaville. However, the argument suffers a series of logical flaws and critical problems, and is therefore wholly unpersuasive.（太绝对 如果你列出了作者的三点论据 只有你彻底的把没有条都推翻了 才能这么说。一般好的argu都是指出漏洞并提出弥补漏洞的方案）

To begin with, the author only provide the average length of a patient's stay for the two hospitals, however, the number of samples and the condition of subjects are both vague.（不要去追究平均数sample这些问题 毫无意义 想写好a 要看出的是作者逻辑上的破绽 就是因无法即果 导致论据失效 你后面提到的小病去小医院 大病去大医院才是关键 小病人多 所以average length短 cure rate 高 complains少 而与treatment quality无关 这才是着力论证的） Unfortunately, some other possibilities may lead to the average length increase or decrease besides the better quality. For instance, perhaps the Saluda hospital is too small and poor to treat those grave diseases and they can only treat small ill such as cold, fever and headache. Therefore, the condition of patients in Saluda hospital is slight and those serious patients totally send to Megaville hospital for the reason that it is larger and better. Thus, the Saluda's average length of a patient's stay is undoubtedly longer than Megaville's. In addition, the error of second fact about the cure rate among patients is similar to the first fact. So, these two facts are both unwarranted.

Moreover, the third fact that the Saluda hospital has few complaints is also questionable. The author only cites the fact, but without any further support to prove that fact.（fact is fact 不要质疑fact的facticity 而要质疑由此fact 得不出作者的结论--saluda的treatmentl更好） More importantly, the author begs a pivotal data-- the amount of patients in every hospital. Without this vital number, the author cannot simply obtain the number of per patient’s employees and the total count of complaints about service. It is possible, for example, that the Saluda hospital has only a little patients and a myriad of doctors, on the country, Megaville has vast patients. Therefore, even though Megaville also has a number of employees, their patient's per employees cannot compare with Saluda's. Similarly, the huge amount of patients unavoidably could lead to more complaints no matter how great of their service. （人家说了average patient stay, 此段全删）

Finally, even if we assume that all the facts as mentioned above are whole truth, we cannot conclude the Saluda hospital is more economical just for the reason that it's smaller and nonprofit. Perhaps, the operational coats of the Saluda are higher than the Megaville’s, such as the price of medicines, the salary of doctors and the expense of hospital’s rents. Thus, the Saluda’s cost of whole process of treatment must higher than the Megaville, though it’s smaller and nonprofit.（此段有理~nonprofit 不代表economical ）

In conclusion, the statement cannot be taken serious as it stands. To better evaluate the argument we would need to know the number of each hospital's patients to exactly count the average and per data. Moreover, it must show the fee and the treatment quality of each hospital to support is conclusion.

语法问题我没去改 感觉改了也没有意义 A的练习关键就是训练对于论据与论点之间的逻辑关系漏洞的嗅觉。感觉只要你不刻意去尝试能力以外的长句、难句的话 语法问题不大
A的高频不好使 所以 当年感觉你的嗅觉够灵敏了的时候 A的练习就到位了
我A不好 只浅谈此一二 凡事还要靠自己领悟

银落UID: 2632560

二毛亲改了。。那我就不该了。。嘻嘻。。

lz啊。。我已经说过了。。越是急躁越是复习不进的。。

被改过的文章要好好地再去修改对比。。然后从中学到东西。。不然。。自己白写。。别人白改。。

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

4# flear
哈哈~我也是着急着的~现在真恨不得一天当42个小时使~
对了~主体第二段我反驳的是第三个事实~就是S的投诉少且每个病人的医生多
我反驳是说可能S本来病人就少，那可不投诉就少么？
然后M的病人多，那么即使他的医生也很多，但是也不能跟S比
这里面没说average的事儿啊？为什么要全删？我还觉得我反驳的挺有道理的呢，5555~
打击还是挺大的~本来还觉得这篇ARGU我写的挺好的呢，而且发上来之前我都改过了的。。。。。。

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

5# 银落
恩呢呢~你们帮我改的我都认真看完后存好了~隔天再从写~这样是不是好点儿？
现在确实有点急躁~不知所措~

flearUID: 2533174

我自己A本来就不太好 为了不误导你 你去看这几个帖子 看透彻了 在此基础上练好了 A就差不多了
但很难看透彻 也很难练好 而这些只能靠自己琢磨
师傅带进门 修行看个人
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-661181-1-1.html
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-274535-1-1.html
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p%3Bfilter%3Ddigest
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p%3Bfilter%3Ddigest
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-692647-1-1.html
有两个链接可能有问题 打不开的话你直接去搜irvine666的帖子 她对a理解的还是很透彻的

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

8# flear
所有连接都能打开~我都仔细的看完了~除了那个问句的~我觉得我现在没时间升华自己的文章了。。。。。。
说实话~受益匪浅~我原来真的觉得argu套套模板就完事儿~大都能得5分左右~看来完全不是那么回子个事儿~还得下功夫啊~
PS:那个三段论不是苏格拉底的么？我们这学期离散刚学完~哈哈~

flearUID: 2533174

多看几遍
argu普遍受轻视 所以aw分今年来也普遍偏低
你吧argu当回事了 你也就有些优势了

xiemeng2370UID: 2749773

10# flear
我原来确实是轻视了~而且很多人都跟我说多看issue
argu背模板就成了~
结果我那俩同学一个3.5~一个才2.5~去年10G