1006G 备考日志 by 环游世界----让每天充实快乐

环游世界UID: 2743584

浅谈提纲系统性
1写ISSUE要有全局观。
2 列关键词
3 有必要的重定义，以此为基础展开论证
4 总结，适当升华
引用：全文论证到这里，算是基本完结了。可以发现，中间甚至没有一个“我赞同……”或“我不赞同……”。但是，这样看下来，作者态度不言而喻。对于教育是应该怎么样做，怎样做才是有效的，始终贯穿全文。这样做的原理是，把事物本身应该如何发展提出来，就无须再去解释为什么“那样做是不合理，或者狭隘的”。无须去纠结于“专门为个人有什么害处”，也无须去批判教育的失衡。这些一，显得很狭隘，出题者心里不是希望你告诉它这个；二，你说不完整。如果不找到一个系统，一个上下浑然一体的通路，你永远都是在挂万漏一。

【写作是一门艺术,请端正态度】
修改作文的标准：
请，先并且时刻修缮基本语法。文法的不通顺比意思的浅显更让人觉得胸闷；
请，尽量选择同一难度和表意范围内的词语。文学性的词在论述文频繁的出现有时会很怪。并且，越是文艺，微妙的差异就越多，用错几率越大；
请，不要试图用一句很长的套句说完所有的意思。句子越长，成分越复杂，错误也就越多，误读也越多，指代模糊，单复数混淆，从句两头时态不符，都是长句的后果；
请，尽量不要用过多的BE动词，“BE”在英文里仅仅表达一种状态，I am here. You are there.都是状态，是没有什么感情色彩的。不如直接用实意动词来的更有色彩和力度；
请，不要轻易的动用废话和套话。宁字数不到，也别滥竽充数。积极的效果没有，还让人觉得态度投机；
请，不要事先假定读者会心领神会你的每一句潜台词。交待完整，限定清晰；
请，保持阅读（我指的是规范的英文作品）的习惯。这是写作的永恒真理。虽然说三人必有我师，但写作毕竟是比较个人化的事，同为习者，还仍然缺乏对作品的判断优劣的能力，也许对方的优点并不一定能教会你，可缺点常常让你对自己的错误更加包容；
请，时刻警醒你的逻辑。哪怕每一种论述方式都是先观点后说明，先论述谁后论述谁，重点论谁简要论谁，甚至是段落的摆放，都最好先想明白这样做是为什么？因为如果平时练习就没有培养这种习惯，在考场上就更没有多余的时间来训练你的逻辑。不要指望读者会自动为你找出逻辑。

ieyangj08UID: 2743219

楼主加油！

环游世界UID: 2743584

56"Governments should focus more on solving the immediate problems of today rather than trying to solve the anticipated problems of the future."



Millions of years ago, there are no governments at all. With human culture developed, governments, made to defense and pursue it interest, emerged. Even now it still preforms almost the same function. As both immediate and anticipated problems are concerned with people's interest, the government bears the responsibility to tackle them at the same time.

Government should solve the immediate problems such as poverty and medical care. Each of them has a close association with people's daily life. Poverty made the biggest barricade for economy growth and happiness, as people has no money to consume and purchase what they want. What's more, it's just the trigger of a vicious circle. People, eager for money but have no access, would go extremes, for nobody would sit to die. This would cause a tremendous negative effect on the society construction. About every government in the world is striving to make fortune for its people. For example America has come up with an economy-boosting strategy, with ostensible intents: give more jobs and prevent companies from bankruptcy. A little further this also prevents people from poverty. Not only poverty, but also terrorism and transportation have deep connections with people. As a responsible government, it should not blind to these immediate problems.

When dealing with near problems, government should not neglect the anticipated ones, which is definite to take its toll in the future if left alone. This coming-late impairment may also go later and have a chronic but fundamental side influence on the society. The population of China is a good case, which is just 100 million at the 1950 but at sky-rocketing speed to 700 million in 1978 due to then domestic policy that more people more power since China needs a lot of labors. The gigantic population became the heaviest burden of Chinese economic progress after that. A neglect of all-around estimation of a large population make Chinese go through the past but lag its children. However, if this policy was more moderate, things would go different at all. So a full consideration of immediate and anticipated problems is a good choice of governments.

In conclusion, both immediate and anticipated problems are associated with people's interests. And governments should ponder their importance and influence at the same time to decide what to do.



Responsiblitiy responsibility
Voicious vicious
Tremandrous tremendous
Startegy
strategy
Futher
further
Terrorisim terrorism
Definte definite
Lagre
large

自评：
1篇幅短，细节不充实，逻辑连接词少
2从句使用不好，总是用多个陈述句
3，be动词太多，不生动。4句式单一，复习倒装

环游世界UID: 2743584

今儿看了下college writing skills with reading关于主题句和论据的指导。主题句范围要适当，for example, traffic jam causes a lot of problems is too broad.
There are many traffic jams in my neighborhood is too narrow. Traffic jam consumes a lot of extra energy may be good. 此外主题句不能是对下文的声明，要表达观点。此外起支撑的论据要有适当的细节，这样一是发展充分，问题说得清，二是凑字数^^。在段内句子的排放，感觉fundamantal里的3w不错。先说主题，介绍这样做的重要性(Why).不这样会有什么后果(how)。举个例子(what).下结论.相信细节丰富后，字数会上的去了。从句等句子的用法，多看看范文和优秀习作学习下吧。

环游世界UID: 2743584

69"Government should place few, if any, restrictions on scientific research and development"

We modern people benefit from the fruits of science researches a lot, with cellphones making it possible to talk remotely and computer simplifying everyday work and other numerous facilities making our life easy. However, some researches, at the same time, endangered the security of the whole society and challenge the masses' moral toleration which may result in social turbulence. Since the government bears the responsibility to protect its citizens, it should place moderate limitations on the effect-unexpected topics.

Some fields unknown for people and mostly dangerous or too moral-challenging for people should be limited. Many new trends in the advanced science branches come out every day, which may not be publicly known but have close relations with the public. These secret projects hidden from ordinary people, if let alone, may boom a bad effect in the future while restricted properly may give unexpected interests. For example, the atomic bomb studied by USA during the second war has cause a blood bath in Japan. Before this event, nobody outside Manhattan could anticipate the bomb and imagine such bleak ruins it would leave. While it was actually made and set off on a populated area with a shadow in the history. Of course, that atomic bomb was aimed to cease war, but should it be the proper choice according to that situation? Afraid not, since its desperate ruining power. And the reason why we adopt the last choice may lie in the fact we hold it and insufficient knowledge of its effect. If we had not hold this weapon, we may search for a better means from a whole perspective. What's more, nuclear weapons are becoming the pursuit of some irresponsible countries and terrorists, which may form a new threat to the security of the world. On the other hand, nuclear power stations working like a gradually exploding atomic bomb have offer a cleaner energy compared to coal and more efficiency than fire ones. In France energy of this kind takes most of its electricity supply. Thus nuclear science is both beneficial and dangerous for people, but at the beginning of its development no individual could foresee so far and have the ability to influence the field. In this case governments should play the role of prophets and play restrictions on the suspicious fields.

To what extent the restrictions would be remains a good issue too: too deep, hinder its normal development of good side while too superficial, no effect at all. Colon serves as a good example. In 1997, the first cloned sheep comes into birth with a worldwide watch and followed by a heated argument about whether we should try to colon people. This even spreads to the Congress. America made laws banning such research as it would destroy the basic human moral, respect lives. While this field develops, it’s possible that cloned organs may turn facts now. As it may also surpass someone's baseline, it may again become a hot topic. What attitude we hold to it remains to be seen. If we put too harsh restrictions, thousands of lives which could be saved may sacrifice. If we just turn a blind eye to its development, maybe out comes a disguised clonal human research. So when dealing with such problems government should ponder carefully enough for a winner-winner result.

In conclusion human in front of mysterious nature is still ignorant to some degree, and we cannot afford to pay price for wrong science research on the behalf of the interest of all the humans. So government should make the balance of whether and how to make restrictions.


自评，
开头，很棘手。中间写作时思路不流畅。想到了写不出来，而且思路转瞬即逝。结尾不知该明确改过全文思路。还是适当展开，重述观点更好。语言还是个大问题，写跟不上想。素材单一。

解决：
1多写形成风格。2I+1A
2坚决贯彻提纲，不能边写边改太多，思路要清晰，全神贯注。
3 看college writing,每日一评。精华总结思路。
4 TOEFL，词汇积累复习早起第一件事

环游世界UID: 2743584

每日一评Argument中如何表现行文逻辑https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1058651-1-1.html
第一段最好直接写出作者是在哪里出错了，而不是把作者的根据和结论直接复述一遍。因为第一段要给判卷者一种感觉是，看了你一段就要知道此篇写什么，如何写了。
每段写完中心句不要急着举例子，应该分析下作者什么地方错了，为什么会错（如果找得出）。argument并不是要我们单纯的举出一些例子来反驳提干的正确性，而是identify之后需要analyze，这里也是判分的重要标准。

每日一评A的论证如何深入https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1059003-1-1.html
注意指出错误，分析错误和举例的推进过程，做到coherence。

每日一评
审题立意深化，例证结合
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1059182-1-1.html
用A的方法分析I也是一个突破口。“按照ARGUMENT的逻辑，不攻击事实，攻击事实链接观点的部分”。审题立意深化，我觉得还是要多思考，多阅读背景材料。而例证结合又是一致性和过度的问题了。Coherence, unity, support.

每日一评 A的推断不能仅仅基于假设
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1059630-1-4.html
1注意潜台词，要写出来。”Also, perhaps Hopewell has less land than OV to build a golf course (还是没写清楚,我帮你加一句 has less land than OV to build a golf course, thus rendering the construction of a golf course impracticable)”;
同时要适当，像之前的History has rhythms.就不要解释了。
2 对于A的推断不能仅基于假设，其实在范文A1，however一段，说明有other possible alternatives时，用的都是假设，并且也没有举现实中的例子，但它们都与本段TS密切相关。所以假设一定要和TS联系起来。

每日一评 Issue清晰表达自己的观点
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1060099-1-1.html
“一篇成功的Issue要使读者很容易发现文章和每段的中心，而且看了文章的中心就知道本文要写哪些方面了；看了本段的中心就知道本段写的是哪个论点了。”

环游世界UID: 2743584

I题库总结
社会类
关键词：竞争，社会发展，法律，利益分配，个人隐私，领导才能，全球化
竞争与合作：2，46，70，75，95，209，175，194
社会发展：15，142 11
法律：174，178，180，17
利益分配：61，170
个人隐私：29
领导才能：160，89
成就评价：36，241，140
心理：41 33 77
全球化：13 197 116 111

行为类
关键词：价值观，成功之道，与人相处，创新，环境，责任，选择，计划，独立与质疑
价值观： 86 91 139 145 146 22 210 186
成功之道：99 118 141 188 236
与人相处：71 74
创新：87，199，165，216，187
环境：121自然 163人文
选择：136 163
责任与自由：162，206 211 234
独立与质疑：238 239 240


教育
分类参考了https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=132579，感谢。
关键词：目的，内容，方法，参与者，评判标准，资金
目的：52,78,90,102,104,153,213,232
内容：34，132，5
方法之素质教育：67 106 47 94 112 98 191 230 14（学习类）
方法之其他：228,134,222
参与者：父母154，教师50，学生39，223，
评价标准：51，55 80 100 128 191 201
作用：130


科技类
关键词：技术影响（抽象和具体），目的，技术双刃剑，科技限制，有效科研40
技术双刃剑：58, 135 31
技术影响之具体：7 38 66 150 38 151 155 107 159 219 233
技术影响之抽象：88 114 129 16 166 196 237
目的：30 124
科技限制：69
ELSE:115



学习类
关键词：知识爆炸，学科交叉，方法，实践，局限与突破
知识爆炸：183 23
学科交叉：4 9（分科过细）
方法： 217 229
实践：28 57 138 204 164（想象VS实践）
独立与合作：42，59，200，181
局限与突破：92
目的：179
影响：177 179 180
ELSE: 168

政治类
关键词：谎言与公正，有效领导，权力
谎言与公正：8 108 167 169 224
有效领导：43 45 79 105 202 20 56 195 3
ELSE：44 85 97 123 83

文化类
关键词：文化载体，
文化碰撞
文化载体：1，6，10，49，63，207，208 131 144
文化碰撞：147
创新：172，173，227



历史类
关键词：保护，研究，经验与价值，评价（文化类，时代差距）
保护：26
研究历史：48
110（storyteller）
经验与价值：120，133，84，137，54，103，125，189，221.
评价：76，241，36


传媒类
关键词：公正，广告
公正：60 161
广告：109




交叉类
政府对科技，艺术，生活，环境：44 85 97 123 83
科技对艺术，学习：176，205
ELSE:119 182 184 212(目标VS手段) 235（忠诚好VS坏）231（所有事都要和谐）
240（肯定VS否定）
1+1:225 226 231 225


未分清： 70

环游世界UID: 2743584

今天下午AW终于暂时结束了。ISSUE 50,高频。ARGUMENT18,也是很常规的题。运气还不错，不过写的一般：思路还过得去，就是语言不好，用的词大都很简单。可笑的是，这2个多月的准备中，我几乎把重点都放在提高语言表达上了，但过程中进入了一个误区：把写作和积累词汇分割开了。TOEFL写作词汇伴侣倒是过了N遍，但写的时候却总想不起来用。。。同时完整的文章考前只写了20篇，前50的提纲在考前3天才列完。这一切都使得最后的三天暗无天日：10个小时以上写英文提纲，翻译例子，还有分析范文。考前一天，对比自己硬套的三段式，每段开头TS，理证，例证，结论，发现6分范文大都没按照1+3+1的风格，但是过渡却很自然，而且论证也很紧密，一度想模仿这种风格，无奈时间不够了，所以范文是需要在写作的不同阶段重新拿来分析的，常看常新。 还有一个最大的体会，就是越是到最后这几天，越是发现还有这么多有用的资料要看，不是因为它们刚刚被总结出来，也不是因为不知道到哪去找，就是没有这个要去找，要把所有精华过一遍的意识。这里向后来的人大声推荐论坛里的精华帖，真的很有用：可以少走很多弯路，而且也是对自己写作方式的一次审视，找的方法很简单：进入各个子版块（备考精彩专题....），最上边有“精华”两字，选上。MS介绍这个方法介绍很多余，说它完全出于自己吃的苦头，真的不想再看到后来人犯同样的错误。精华要经常看才能升华。

考前几天偶然看到无夏姐姐的文章，说GRE只是生活的一部分，不管好与坏，我们都还要坚持往前走，重要的是坚持到最后，重要的是我们经历了这个过程，重要的是它带给我们的想法和提高。这次AW备考很大的收获就是完成一件较为复杂的“事”的方法：清楚自己的资源，明确计划，坚定地努力。 其中每一点又有很多细节。 资源包括网络的，身边的，书上的，网上的，有的，没有的；计划要考虑好时间分配，任务不能太少更不能太多，适当调整，多与他人沟通，吸取经验；坚定包括每天坚持，积极的态度，不断思考提高的方法，选择合理的放松方式。

最后，祝06G的XDJM高频！10G的XDJM，我就是前车之鉴，勿仿，AW备考中会有很多体会的，这个过程很动人，加油。

海王泪UID: 2673613

TOEFL写作词汇伴侣~我也弄过 不过真正有效的都是还是经常用的那几个···证明要常造句呀··SIGH

精华要经常看才能升华。

嗯嗯。。。同感 ^_^

环游世界UID: 2743584

恩，总是经历了才知道哪些是错的，笔试必须反思了。 24# 海王泪