phenix写作小组2号第七次作业A

wu-intrepidUID: 2659758

TOPIC: ARGUMENT169 - The following appeared in a letter from a department chairperson to the president of Pierce University.

"Some studies conducted by Bronston College, which is also located in a small town, reveal that both male and female professors are happier living in small towns when their spouses are also employed in the same geographic area. Therefore, in the interest of attracting the most gifted teachers and researchers to our faculty and improving the morale of our entire staff, we at Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire. Although we cannot expect all offers to be accepted or to be viewed as an ideal job offer, the money
invested in this effort will clearly be well spent because, if their spouses have a chance of employment, new professors will be more likely to accept our offers."



In arguer's opinion, Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty in order to increase the most gifted teachers and enhance the morale of entire staff. Though this method is effective in some degree, it is not a proper project, for its fair high expense and the low potency.

First, the research reveals that the professors would like to live in small towns, if their spouses have a job in the same town. We can infer that the spouse getting jobs are the one of the conditions that professors will teach in small town. While the research does not tell us that it is the only one factor that influence the professors' choices of schools. In general, when choosing a school, the professor considers teaching equipments, the level of income, and the academic ambiance and so on. The research does not provide what effects the decision of professors most. Supposing Pierce University with poor teaching devices, which a most gifted professor consider to be the essential, then even providing his wife an appropriate employment, he may tend to other university with advanced equipment. Therefore, not compared with other factors, the validity of offering jobs to mates of teachers is hard to identify.  

Second, even this means is actually valid, there is no need to offer employment to spouse of each faculty member.Since the intention is to attract the most talent professors, as long as apply the method to these ones instead all. Further, if the university put this means into practice, may even not increase teachers’ initiative, rather hurt that of some teachers. For examples, two teachers’ wives get jobs by this university’s effort, and the one’s job is better than that of the other. In this case, the teacher, whose wife getting worse job, may complaint the unfair of this school and consider himself not be appreciated. However, the different standard of offered jobs is unavoidable. In actual, to enhance the positivity of the staff, the university can take some other solutions to increase teachers’ sense of duty and belonging. Such as holding activities of student-teacher interaction, communicating with teachers more often to know their need and troubles.
  
In addition, this method may cause finance difficulty. Because the university would pay great amount money to aid the teachers’partners getting jobs. Lack of money, the university would decrease the expense of researching and equipment, even the wages of teachers, which may lead to some possessed learned teachers, leave to pursue the better conditions or higher wages. Thus, the method may make the university lose the capable teachers actually.

In conclusion, the arguer does not provide the sufficient evidence to prove the advantages of offering employment to teachers’ partners. On if taking other factors into consideration, such as the teaching equipment, academic atmosphere, and the finance capability, the arguer can make a compelling conclusion. .

ningbo1990UID: 2641538

In arguer's opinion, Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty in order to increase the most gifted teachers and enhance the morale of entire staff.（这句话有人质疑过这样的开头，因为他是由中间一堆的推到举出的结论，你下面攻击的是推到过程，而不是这个结论本身，所以直接攻击结论是不对的。推荐换一种把，如何换问9号） Though this method is effective in some degree, it is not a proper project, for its fair high expense and the low potency.

First, the research reveals that the professors would like to live in small towns, if their spouses have a job in the same town. We can infer that the spouse getting jobs are the one of the conditions that professors will teach in small town. While the research does not tell us that it is the only one factor that influences the professors' choices of schools（college or uni）. In general, when choosing a school, the professor considers teaching equipments, the level of income, and the academic ambiance and so on. The research does not provide what effects the decision of professors most. Supposing Pierce University with poor teaching devices, which a most gifted professor consider to be the essential, then even providing his wife an appropriate employment, he may tend to other university with advanced equipment. Therefore, not compared with other factors, the validity of offering jobs to mates of teachers is hard to identify.  (推荐看看官方范文，不是这样写的，这里给你看看ETS发来5港币的文件里那本绿书上的官方解释：You are not being asked to agree or disagree with the position stated; instead, you are being asked to comment on the thinking that underlies the position stated. You are not being asked to express your own views on the subject being discussed; instead, you are being asked to evaluate the logical soundness of an argument of another writer and, in doing so, to demonstrate the critical thinking, perceptive reading, and analytical writing skills that university faculty consider important for success in graduate school.看到了吗，所以作者看所有官方范文里，就是直接点下逻辑错误，后面跟几个maybe, maybe，也就是反驳的情况。作者这样写完全分析是不对的。)

Second, even this（另外一段this指的是什么？） means is actually valid, there is no need to offer employment to spouse of each faculty member. Since the intention is to attract the most talent professors, as long as apply the method to these ones instead all. Further, if the university put this means into practice, may even not increase teachers’ initiative; rather hurt that of some teachers. For examples,（不是issue!!!!!这里要用maybe there is a condition that ）two teachers’(这个撇不是单引号，而是键盘1旁边那个键) wives get jobs by this university’s effort, and the one’s job is better than that of the other. In this case, the teacher, whose wife getting worse job, may complaint the unfair of this school and consider himself not be appreciated.（根据上面ETS官方说明，这里不允许你表达你自己的思想，举出反例就可以） However, the different standard of offered jobs is unavoidable. In actual, to enhance the positivity of the staff, the university can take some other solutions to increase teachers’ sense of duty and belonging. Such as holding activities of student-teacher interaction, communicating with teachers more often to know their need and troubles.
  
In addition, this method may cause finance difficulty. Because the university would pay great amount money to aid the teachers’ partners getting jobs. Lack of money, the university would decrease the expense of researching and equipment, even the wages of teachers, which may lead to some possessed learned teachers, leave to pursue the better conditions or higher wages. Thus, the method may make the university lose the capable teachers actually.

In conclusion, the arguer does not provide the sufficient evidence to prove the advantages of offering employment to teachers’ partners. On if taking other factors into consideration, such as the teaching equipment, academic atmosphere, and the finance capability, the arguer can make a compelling conclusion.

1.下次作文提纲写出来把，这样好看。
2.内容的话，我把我的列出来，可以参考下，因为每个人都不一样，所以不能说哪个对哪个错：
1.研究未必具有代表性
2.happy的程度只能主观意识，因而未必由于spouse原因，可能有其它原因，工作，家人，收入，环境等
3.即使是由于spouse的原因，未必能够吸引到有天分的老师，也未必能improve morale
4.B未必能用于P学校
5.没有信息说P学校对教授有需求需要招聘。
以上仅供参考。