argument45 求拍

ella_dylUID: 2595060

45.
The following appeared as an editorial in a wildlife journal.
"Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of a year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed, and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the decline in arctic deer populations is the result of deer being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea."


In the argument, the author advocates that the decline of the deer population in Canada is exclusively due to the warming trends which check the deer's regular moving between islands for fodder. To support this claim, the argument cites the reports from local hunters that deer populations are declining while global warming has caused the sea ice to melt. Although this argument might seem reasonable at first glance, it is in fact ill-conceived.

The threshold problem is the credibility of the reports from hunters. Limited to time and living range, it is quite difficult for hunters to keep the pace of deer's migration. Perhaps the mass deer confine in one large island where there is enough food for them to live by, and there is less chance for hunters to see them. Moreover, the job of hunters reminds us that over-hunting is likely to be responsible for the decline of deer population.

Besides over-hunting, there may be other reasons which contribute to the decline. Ecology tells us that over-breeding would cause the lack of food, which may cause the population decrease afterwards. So does the existence of natural enemy. The author fails to consider all these possible causes, which seriously weaken the author's claim.

However, the crucial flaw the author commits is that global warming trends do not necessarily result in the temperature rise of where deer live. Since the warming trends are global, they may not reflect the authentic situation of arctic region. It is highly possible that temperature there remains the same as usual or even lower. Even assuming arctic region is getting warmer, it is arbitrary to affirm that deer population is getting smaller. Climate change may influence the lifestyle of deer and their habitat, but not to the extent of extinction. For instance, they could migrate to other areas that are more comfortable. Therefore, there is no convincing evidence to prove that there is a relation between the global warming and the decline of deer population.

To sum up, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To strengthen the argument, the author would have to provide persuasive evidence that it is the temperature rise that was mainly responsible for the decline of deer population. Moreover, the author should also prove that other cause which may lead to the same situation is subordinate after carefully examining them.

hurongchildUID: 2595535

最大的问题是三个段落的安排吧~最主要的问题应该第一个说~
另外第二段写的不是太好。开头说有可能是其它原因，不如直接说作者没有考虑到有可能是其它原因好~我觉得啊~再一个就是其它的原因只给出了两个，其实还有很多的，自己想~
还有第一段最后一句说有可能是过度捕杀，这个放到第二点应该好一些~
还有就是第三点，看看你写的两个分论点到底是不是围绕主题句来的···嘿嘿，你就知道应该怎么稍微改一下这个开头的句子了~
总的来说还可以啊~我觉得~