3/4 agrument 101 第一篇习作,大家狠狠拍

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The following appeared in a memo from the president of a company that makes breakfast cereals.
"In a recent study, subjects who ate soybeans at least five times per week had significantly lower cholesterol levels than subjects who ate no soy products. By fortifying our Wheat-O cereal with soy protein, we can increase sales by appealing to additional consumers who are concerned about their health. This new version of Wheat-O should increase company profits and, at the same time, improve the health of our customers."


In this argument, the author raised a proposal that the company fortify our Wheat-O cereal with soy protein. To support his argument, the author claims that soybeans are effective to lower the cholesterol levels, and concludes that profits could be increased. It is also suggested that new version of Wheat-O would serves to appeal more consumers thanks to its healthy function. It might be true at the first glance; logical mistakes, however, can be found in a close scrutiny.
It seems convincing that soybeans taken indicates a low cholesterol levels, but it might be a false in that the decrease could be brought by other factors which the subjects shared, such as their healthy eating diets and sport habits. Moreover, even assuming that soybeans did have certain influence on the cholesterol levels, the author falsely suggested that soy products, soybeans, and soy protein are equally effective, because it could be distinguished in the passage that lower levels of cholesterol are the result owing to eating soybeans as soy products. Also, it is then automatically concluded the soy protein is the ingredients affecting the cholesterol levels. Without ruling out these possibilities, I cannot be persuaded that the reduction in cholesterol is caused directly by the taking of soy products.
Even it could be conceded that the soy proteins are the reasons that contributes to the drop of cholesterol levels, it still might be unsubstantiated that the new version has an influence in keeping healthy for the undetermined dosage. Perhaps the protein contained might be not enough to act effectively, or it is more than enough to cause grave disaster. Without carrying out prevention of disaster, it is unwarranted to me indeed, let alone some other attributes.
Admittedly, given that more and more consumers are taking health into consideration, it could be correctly oriented to add soy protein in the cereal. Nevertheless, the author fails to realize other aspects in adding the protein. Perhaps, the cost of producing the cereal is likely to increase, leading a side effect that consumers who used to buy the cereal for its low price may lose considering it not as absorbing as it was. Or perhaps adding other ingredients will change the original taste. Without the tasty flavor, profits cannot be earned as expected. Therefore, I cannot be thoroughly convinced that the new additive will have a positive influence on the profits.
Even assuming that the ingredients added will not cause any side effects, the numbers of consumers will increase are probably only the imagination of the author, for the reason that consumers in this area might be not actually frequently concerned about health diets. Or it is certainly possible that they keep healthy by doing certain kinds of activities not the healthy food. Could these factors be exactly figured out in a scientific way, I can then accept the conclusion established by the author.
To conclude, it cannot be verified that the new version of cereal is a method to increase profits and attracting consumers, unless these following questions are answered. The proof (1) soy protein is the effective ingredients instead of other possibilities that lead to the decrease in cholesterol levels. (2) The dosage of soy protein is exactly correct and without negative results. (3) Consumers are concerning about health diets more than other ways of keeping healthy. (4) Consumers are favor of new flavor caused by adding soy proteins. (5) The cost might not be increased due to the additive.

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麻烦哥哥姐姐了,第一篇,很稚嫩,还不是很有感觉,大家狠狠拍!问题很严重啊!谢谢啦!